I Give a Rat's Ass
by dreamkent
Summary: Brucas...light, fun, good times.  Lucas was an ass that Brooke fell hard for. When he comes back into her life, how does that go for them?  Better summary inside, I'm sure everyone will love it. READ ME! Rated M just in case...
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Okay guys this was meant to be a ONESHOT but I wanted to make it longer. So I know I have two other stories out there, but I have to admit, I am a little bummed out by all of my depressing stories that I figured I would do a slight AU fun, light story (with the occasional sappy moments)! A lot of inspiration came into this story for me. This will be a mini story….like less than 20 chapters, maybe fewer!**

**So here's what you need to know…**

**The original five are all 21. **

**Brooke, Nathan, and Haley live together in Durham, NC where they all attend Duke University together.**

**Brooke is an aspiring fashion designer, Haley a teacher, and Nathan a basketball player with a minor in history.**

**Nathan and Haley are NOT married so sorry no little, sweet Jamie, but they have been dating for four years.**

**After a year of modeling around the world, Rachel moves to Durham and attends Duke as well and lives two streets away from BNH. She plays the same storyline as she did on the show in season 2…and after Brucas breaks up, Rachel and Brooke become best friends.**

**Peyton lives in LA interning at a record label company.**

**Lucas left senior year to become an aspiring writer and moved out to New York and attends NYU. **

**Brooke, Lucas, Nathan, Haley, and Peyton all pretty much knew each other when they were in middle school. Brooke and Peyton have the same story about their childhood from the show as well as Lucas and Haley. Nathan and Lucas have always been good brothers but with different mothers and lived with Karen...I'll get into that later. **

**Brooke and Lucas became best friends when they started high school and tried to date senior year. It ended badly due to the fact that he cheats on Brooke with who else? Peyton. (I know ass hole)**

**Lucas is a little more edgy in this story….I am kind of crossing him with Chad M. Murray based solely on his looks and personality with a mixture of Nick from House of Wax. (Can I just say I am EXTREMELY excited to write Lucas this way WHOOP).**

**Brooke is Brooke…minus the whole sleeping around but with the same personality…so pretty much the way we all love her!**

**Also for the sake of this story…Duke is near the beach, just because I said so! **

**I hope all of that was clear as other things will be revealed in the story.  
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**Okay let's get this masterpiece started! ENJOY!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 1: Come Together<strong>

"**You can feel his disease  
>Come together, right now<br>Over me  
>He roller coaster<br>He got early warning" **

–**Come Together, The Beatles**

"What!" I couldn't believe this. This was not happening.

"Oh Tigger, come on. It's been nearly four years. You're going to have to get over it. I mean he's Nathan's brother and my best friend."

"And _my_ ex-boyfriend." I couldn't believe this was happening.

"Come on Davis. Stop whining like a little bitch. You two were pretty much best friends before you crossed over into the dating world. You knew better!" Nathan came pounding down the stairs and stole one of my pancakes and I smacked his hand with my spatula.

"That's not the point! Were either one of you going to discuss this with me before you three decided to plot against me?" I went back to my pancakes and went searching for the chocolate chips.

"No." They said together.

I turned around and my mouth dropped.

"Hey! I live here too and might I add pay rent here as well."

"Yes, but majority rules on this one Brookie." Nathan said with his mouth full of pancakes.

I walked over to him, threw my arm around his neck, and grabbed his mouth.

"Spit it out, Scott! My pancakes don't go to traitors!" I tried to make him spit it out and I was failing big time.

"Children!" Tutor girl snapped into mom mode on us and Nathan and I pulled away from each other.

I glared at him.

"Brooke, it is going to happen sooner or later, I mean you will be my maid of honor and he will be Nathan's best man one day. Better rip off that band-aid sooner rather than later." Haley had a point.

I hated that they were both right. They were _always _right. I knew better than to let things get the way they did between Lucas and me but I couldn't help my stupid heart that had always been madly in love with him. I fell for his charms, fell head over heels in love with him just to have him rip my heart out and stomp on it! It also didn't help that he cheated on me with my best friend who I haven't talked to in months. Just thinking about all of it made my body shutter.

"Well ladies, I am off to the gym. Honey, I love you. Brooke, take it easy. He's going through some shit." He ruffled my hair and I pushed him away from me.

"I can't believe you two are doing this to me." I said drawing my attention back to my pancakes.

"Did you not just tell me a little while ago that you were over him and I mean you were dating Chase for the longest time."

Chase and I were serious, but he had to pull a dick move too and just say that he didn't love me anymore.

"Whatever." I said under my breath. I felt her get closer to me and I turned to look at her.

"There's more." She said.

"Please…tell me he isn't bringing a chic with him." I said.

"Haha…no, but since Nate is going to be at practice and I'm going to do my observing at the high school…someone needs to pick him up from the airport."

I dropped my spatula and turned to look at her. I sent daggers piercing through right through her.

"You have got to be kidding me? So not only do you make plans without me, but you want me to be his chauffeur as well? Get him a cab!" I spat out.

"Brooke, come on, be the mature one here. Maybe it will help you. You have to start somewhere." She said placing her hand on my shoulder.

She was right. Yet again she was _always_ right. How they became best friends was beyond me, they barely have anything in common except for their love of literature, but she would always look out for him.

"Fine." I scowled.

She handed me his flight information and kissed my cheek.

"Love you Tigger." As she grabbed her keys and purse.

"Love you tutor girl!" I called back out to her.

"Great." I breathed out.

I walked upstairs to the guest room and noticed that they already had it set up for him. Nathan had some of his old basketball gear sprawled out on the bed and Haley had his Steinbeck collection as well. How in the hell did they plan all of this without my knowledge? I grabbed the door and slammed it shut behind me. This was bull shit. Of course they know I would not have agreed to any of this, which makes sense why I was never brought into the conversation which made it all completely unfair. I realize that no matter what, that in this household I would always be outnumbered by Naley. Always…unless it had to do with girl problems and Haley always had my back.

I read over the flight information and scolded myself for giving my shift away at Bella Rue. His flight would be landing in about three hours. I had three hours to make myself look absolutely breathtaking and make him realize that he was a moron for cheating on me and destroying what we had.

I took a long bubble bath letting the vanilla and jasmine bath salts caress and exfoliate my skin. I washed my hair and shaved my legs, as well as maintaining other parts of my body. My luscious locks were chopped off about a few months ago and were now a hint of burgundy. It was the new me once and I loved it. I transitioned from that naïve high school girl to a hard-working aspiring fashion designer.

I curled my hair so that my curls bounced around my face and shoulders. I winked at myself in the mirror and strode over to my closet and pulled the white doors back and stepped inside. I wanted to keep it simple and casual, but sexy and independent. So I pulled out a black shirt that covered everything in the front and had an intricate braided design to show off the entirety of my back.

"Perfect." I said and reached for a pair of cute white shorts and put on some casual wedges to accent it off.

I looked down at my flashy watch and noticed that by the time I grab my purse, keys and head to the airport and become face to face with him for the first time in years.

"Just breathe, Davis. You are a strong, independent woman who can show just by looking at ya, that Lucas Scott lost the best thing that ever happened to him." I nodded at myself in the mirror.

I glided down the stairs, grabbed my red clutch, my Gucci sunglasses, and keys to my blue Beetle that is still running perfectly. As I drove through town, I found myself relaxing; I didn't need a man to make me feel amazing. I especially didn't need to impress myself to anybody the least of all him, even though I spent forever finding the perfect outfit.

I looked at the radio clock and the traffic was keeping me from being on time.

"Whatever." I breathed. He can wait on me if I show up late.

It was surprisingly a slow day at the small airport and I managed to swipe a parking space close to the entrance. I grabbed his flight information and started walking towards his gate. I took a deep breath and a few guys I walked past nodded or winked at me. Looking good so far Davis, I said to myself.

I got to the gate and people started to disperse and I arrived just in time. I held my purse close to me with my glasses resting on top of my head. I still didn't see him but I really didn't know what he would look like now either. The crowd started to die down and I was beginning to think he missed his flight, but then I saw him and I wasn't surprised at what I saw.

He had his arm around the waist of one of the stewardesses who looked about as dumb as a pile of bricks sitting along the side of the road. I found myself gawking at him, I smirked and shook my head. He had absolutely no idea that I was standing in front of him as he dropped his bag down by his feet and took that hand and let one of his fingers glide down from her chin, neck, and to the front of her blouse as his finger rested on the space between her breasts.

"It's nice to know that some things never change." I finally snapped him out of his gaze towards the blonde bimbo and she glared at me.

"I got your number." He said to the other girl as she blushed, giggled and walked away from him. Her attention went back to me and she glared at me for breaking them up from their moment.

I turned around to watch her leave and turned back to face him. He was definitely different. He was wearing a baggy grey beanie, a black t-shirt, dark blue jeans, and were those Toms? His facial hair was longer than I remembered him ever having it and his eyes were roaming my body.

"Pretty girl." He grinned.

My breath caught in my throat. I can't believe he had the nerve to call me that.

"Dick." I said.

He walked towards me and for a brief moment I saw the boy I fell in love with looking back at me.

"It's good to see you." His eyes were only focused on my face, nowhere else.

"Yeah." I found myself actually missing him just by having him so near.

He held his arms out and I couldn't help it. After everything we've been through, our friendship was more important in the beginning. Damn him for making the first move towards being more than friends all those years ago. I caved and allowed myself to fall into his arms. He enveloped me and lifted me off my feet. I had to tighten my grip around his waist. Some of his fingers managed to slip through the fabric in the back of my shirt and he began to rub them against my skin. I shivered.

"Okay, okay." I swatted his chest after he put me down.

"Come on." I started walking away from him and I could hear him following close behind me.

"You look good. I like the hair."

"Thanks." I said.

"It nice to see some things never change." I said as he dressed the exact same.

"Yeah well you know me."

He tossed his bag in the small trunk of my bug and we got into the car with our sunglasses on and started back towards the house.

"I have to admit I was a little surprised to see you." He said and I turned to look at him.

"Oh yeah? Why is that?"

"Nathan told me Haley was picking me up." He looked over at me and I could feel his blue eyes piercing through me.

"Well I am not surprised by that. I just learned this morning that you all went behind my back and plotted your move-in without my knowledge."

"What!" He said and it was my turn to be the surprised one.

"They told me you were okay with this."

I laughed out loud.

"Okay Scott, now I know you're lying."

"Davis, we both know I'm an ass, but if I knew you weren't on board with this, I would have made other plans."

My glasses were hiding the smile behind my eyes.

"It's okay, I mean it's not, but we were friends before everything that happened and I don't see why this can't work. We are both two different people now, or at least you're a _different_ person." I said to him as we got closer to the apartment.

"Well I don't know all about that, but I'd like to think my experience in New York has put a few things in perspective for me. I'm sorry for what happened back in high school. I was a dick and I felt that we were getting too serious and I didn't want that."

Yeah, he didn't want that with _me. _It hurt to hear him talk about it, but I knew better. I always knew better but I had been in love with him ever since I was thirteen years old.

"It's fine." I said not sounding too convincing.

"So why are you here?" I asked him.

I happened to look over at him and his face hardened, probably not the best time to bring it up.

"Maybe…I just really wanted to spend time with my favorite girl." The same finger he used on the blonde girl earlier started to glide up my thigh.

"In your dreams." I said pushing his hand away.

"You forget…I've already had the real thing." He grinned, licked his lips, and turned to look back outside.

I rolled my eyes at the fact that he ignored my question…but at the same time his touch always makes my insides melt.

"We're here." I chirped.

We both got out of the car and started towards the door.

"This is a nice place. I'm glad you guys are doing well." He walked in behind me and it was refreshingly cool throughout the apartment.

"Yeah. I'd like to think everything is going well for us. Rachel lives two streets over from us. She'll be over for dinner later." When I looked back at him, he had this huge grin on his face.

I shook my head. I remember that he had a little fling with her after she moved here at the end of junior year. It was purely sex between them. I remembered being crushed to know that he was fucking her when I absolutely hated her back then. But there was nothing I could do about because I was just his best friend then.

"So you're room is upstairs on the left across from mine." I sat my purse down and grabbed the latest fashion magazine from the pile of mail on our counter.

He walked upstairs and was gone for a little bit. I figured he probably lied down to take a nap. I started getting things ready for dinner that night. Haley and I were going to cook some salmon fillets, roasted green beans and artichoke pasta with a side of rosemary potatoes. So I let the salmon thaw out in the sink. I started going upstairs silently and when I opened my bedroom door, Lucas was lying down looking through my sketchbook.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" I stormed into my room and snatched my sketchbook away from him.

Just because he used to do this in high school didn't mean it was okay for him to do it now.

"Whoa pretty girl. I was just admiring your talent." He held his hands up and kicked his legs to the side of the bed.

"Look you can't just do the things you used to do with me. Things are different now, you and me, our friendship, relationship whatever it is now, is different." I put my sketchbook back in its rightful place and turned to look at him as he still sat on my bed.

"And don't call me that anymore." I didn't like him using my nickname he gave me in high school, the name he would purr in my ear during sex, the name he _only_ called me.

He shook his head and got up from the bed. He was dangerously too close to me and he leaned down to my ear.

"I _love_ that we share a bathroom." He pinched my butt and I smacked him on the shoulder.

He smirked and walked through my bathroom door and closed it behind him. My eyes squinted at the door in anger and I was livid. He had no right but yet he does it anyways. Hell, am I one to refuse him? No, never, that power is not in me to refuse his touch, let alone Lucas Scott no matter how hard I try to.

_I was sitting next to my best friend, Peyton Sawyer, by my pool as the love of my life stripped off his shirt and his Greek God body was displayed for everyone. He had a twelve pack of beer by his side as he reached for one he looks over at me and winks, my heart flutters._

"_You are in way over your head." _

_I snapped my attention to Peyton and she is looking down at her magazine while shaking her head._

"_What are you talking about?" I looked over at her and she was just grinning._

"_You're in love with him and everybody knows it including him." She said as she dropped her magazine to move her attention over to me._

"_I am not." _

"_Please, you are basically eye fucking the shit out of him behind your sunglasses and I would bet money he is enjoying every bit of it." Her attention went back to her magazine and I was about to say something but I was interrupted._

_Nathan and Lucas surprised us both when they grabbed us, tossed us over their shoulders, and all four of us were thrown into the pool._

"_What the hell?" I screamed as I resurfaced. My glasses were somewhere in the pool and Lucas was standing in front of me with his eyebrow raised._

"_Oh come on dimples, where's your sense of adventure?" He started moving closer to me._

_No, Scott! NOOOOO!" I squealed as he wrapped his strong arms around my waist and pulled me under the water._

_While we were under water as Nathan and Peyton had their own little water fight above, and Haley off to the side laughing, Lucas pulled me close and his lips were on mine. Before I could register what was happening his tongue found the entrance to my mouth successfully keeping water from entering. My eyes immediately shot open and his were open too and I felt him grin against my mouth. He pulled away and swam further from me._

_What the hell just happened?_

"Damn him to hell." I said.

I heard the front door close downstairs and God was I happy for someone else to be here in the house with us.

"Yo Luke!"

"Nathan!"

I heard the two brothers exchange their hellos. I took the stairs down and Nathan reeked of a foul stench. He noticed my crinkled up nose and made his way to me.

"No." I held out a finger.

The two boys exchanged a look. They both made their way slowly towards me.

"If either of you dare to touch me I'll chop your balls off among other things." I was seriously outnumbered and there was no way my threats would do me any good.

I screamed as they both ran towards me and I was trapped. Lucas's strong arms wrapped around my waist from behind and I was attacked by Nathan from the front. An extreme bear hug was taken place and I could barely breathe as his stench pierced my nose and I was now covered in his odor.

"LET ME GO!" I screamed and Nathan backed away but Lucas still held me close. His mouth went to my ear again.

"Hmm…" He said and I could tell he was taking in my scent.

I wiggled out of his arms and glared at the both of them.

"I hate you!" I screamed and pounded up the stairs.

I locked myself away in the bathroom and looked in the mirror. Deep down a part of me missed that. I missed having Luke around.

"_What are we doing?" I asked him as he had me pushed up against the desk in one of the abandoned classrooms._

"_Fun?" He said as his hot mouth was attached to my neck. _

"_Yeah but what does that mean about us?" I said trying to concentrate on getting my words out but his hands, his mouth, and his hardened dick was not helping me out._

_He pulled away for a minute and his breath was against my face._

"_It just means we're having fun, nothing serious." _

_I was going to say something but his lips attacked mine and I really didn't care anymore. I was finally getting what I wanted._

He was honest from the very beginning so I could never blame him for me falling in love with him, for letting it go as far as it did. He never really cheated on me even though that's what I always called it, but sleeping with my best friend is cheating…its crossing a line. I never should have opened my stupid mouth and told him that I loved him.

"Ass hole." I said.

I could not take the smell any longer. I stripped out of my clothes, turned the shower on, and let the hot water wash away the disgusting body odor Nathan just had to get all over me. I was going to prove to Lucas that he doesn't get under my skin anymore or at least pretend. Yes, that's exactly what I was going to do. I was going to drive him crazy. I cut the shower off and when I pulled the shower back I was not prepared to see what I did.

Lucas was standing in front of me shaving his beard and he was shirtless. He looked over at me and his eyes began to roam my body continuing his shaving and he smirked at me.

"What the hell!" I forgot to lock his bathroom door and I tried to reach for my towel but he took it off the rack and held it behind him.

I could not believe this was happening. He dropped his razor, wiped the remaining shaving cream from his face and I was hobbling trying to cover myself the best that I could naked in front of him as he was enjoying every bit of it, so I did the one thing I could think of to make him stop. I reached down and grabbed his dick and balls and squeezed them, he let out a hiss.

"Oooh…see there's the girl I've been missing." He twitched in my hand and I rolled my eyes.

"Scott, hand me the towel now." I squeezed harder and his eyes shut tightly.

"Only if you say please." He managed to choke out. He wasn't going to give up so I figured I would start my plan.

I leaned into his ear.

"Please." I said seductively.

He was putty in my hand. He dropped the towel as his head fell upon my shoulder. I reached for the towel hurriedly and rushed into my bedroom.

_Ohmigodohmigodohmigod _raced through my mind as I got a high from what just happened.

How was he able to sneak into the bathroom without me noticing it? I shook my head of it and just really wished that Haley would head home already. Maybe I could get Rachel over here quickly, ugh, I thought, I don't think I want her here yet either with the history between her and Luke.

I quickly pulled on a pair of jeans and an oversized t-shirt. No, I thought. I have to look good at all times. I grabbed a small tank and nodded towards myself. Looking good, I thought. I towel dried my hair to let it fall in waves above my shoulders.

I went downstairs and Haley was sitting at the kitchen island with the tub of ice cream in front of her.

"Whoa, rough day?" I reached for a spoon and started helping her.

"If you're digging in, I'm guessing your day wasn't any better." She scoffed and I smiled at her.

"Well it's nice to know that Luke is still Luke." I said.

"I'm sorry?" She questioned not sure if what I meant was a bad thing or not.

"What happened today?" I asked her.

"I don't know what I was thinking when I decided to become a teacher. I should have done something with music. High school kids are a nightmare." She scooped another large helping of the moose tracks ice cream and filled her mouth full of it.

"Do tell." I said digging in more of it myself.

"One of the boys in my class that I observe is always studying my body with his eyes and licking his lips. I finally had enough of it today and pretty much just called him out on it acting like a child myself." She shook her head at her disappointment in herself and I smiled.

"Well that actually sounds like my day but mine involved touching as well."

"Are you serious? I had a talk with him about that, I can't believe him." She said as she stuck her spoon back into the ice cream.

"It's okay, I mean it's not, but I handle Lucas." I said and speaking of the devil, he looked absolutely amazing.

"Haley Bob!"

"Lucas Eugene."

As he made his way over to her, she smacked him hard into the chest.

"What the hell was that for?" He rubbed the place she hit him.

"I told you no funny business with Brooke and you've been groping her all day?"

"And not to mention he just let himself carry on with his business while I was in the shower earlier and stole my towel." I loved it when Haley would get onto Lucas.

Like I said she was great at mom mode and everyone always listened to her.

"Lucas Scott. Are you kidding me?" Her eyes went wide and he looked over at me insulted that I would tell on him.

"It's fun." He said and received another smack from Haley.

"Leave her alone. Don't walk in on her when she's in the shower. Don't even touch her!" She pointed that finger in his face again and I just smirked at him as I put another spoonful of ice cream in my mouth.

He pulled Haley into a hug and held her close. I would never understand their bond but it was untouchable. I could not forget the moment he found out that Haley and Nathan…

_Lucas and I went to get pizza, beer, and the movie we were all planning on watching. Peyton was running late as usual which meant code for doing it with Jake. Lucas and I even fooled around a little bit in his car. Once we were back at the house, Nathan and Haley were not in sight. We both looked at each other, but when we heard the loud thud upstairs, we rushed quickly up to Nathan's bedroom. When Lucas opened the door to Nathan's room we were both surprised to see the scene before us._

_Haley was riding Nathan and my eyes were scarred for life._

"_What the **fuck** are you doing?"_

_I tried to stop giggling behind him, but he shot me an annoyed look._

"_Hey don't look at me. I didn't know this was going on." I held my hands up in defeat._

_Nathan and Haley hurried to cover themselves up. Lucas went to charge out Nathan, but Haley was blocking his way._

"_Lucas, calm down!" Haley said._

"_How can I calm down? This is like watching my baby sister having sex with, fuck, my **brother**!" _

_Lucas always considered Haley family and seeing her with his brother was making his blood boil. Lucas didn't care, he reached for Nathan and yanked him out of bed. Nathan was completely naked and I tried not to stare at his junk._

"_Lucas calm down!" Nathan was trying to calm Lucas down, but there was no doing that._

"_Lucas, stop it!" Haley reached for his arm and he softly pushed her away. _

"_Lucas, let him go!" I yelled out to him. _

_He looked over at me and he scowled and released the naked Nathan._

"_This is unacceptable." _

"_Lucas, damn it we're not just fooling around." _

_He looked at Haley and Nathan used part of the sheet that was wrapped around her to cover himself up._

"_I'm in love with her, Luke." _

"_I love him too." She said._

_Lucas looked over at me and then back at the couple in front of us. _

"_My brother and my best friend are together." He placed his hands on each of their shoulders and I couldn't believe his behavior._

It was like straight out of _Friends_ when Ross found out Chandler was sleeping with his sister. I was trying not to laugh the entire time but a naked Nathan wasn't helping much then. It made me laugh once his attitude changed from anger to sincerity. He knew Haley better than anyone and if she was in love and truly believed that Nathan loved her back, then he knew it had to be real, but it didn't help the fact that I saw them having sex, a visual that I never needed.

"Whatever, get off me." She said and this time playfully smacked him on the chest.

"Where's my boyfriend?" She questioned.

"He's probably in the shower." I said and she smiled at me and skipped down the hallway to their bedroom.

I started getting out pots and pans to start dinner. I could feel his eyes on me and I just ignored him.

"By the way you look amazing...better than I remembered." He said and I couldn't help the smile that crept on my face.

"You are definitely different." He said behind me.

I kept my eyes on the food and he walked over and picked up one of the woks and put it on the stove.

"I'm sorry for how things ended for us back in high school."

I still attended to taking the plastic off of the salmon and just listened to him.

"I feel bad but I told you from the beginning that it wasn't going to end well. I didn't know you were in love with me."

I slammed my fist into the counter.

"Lucas, don't worry about it. I knew better from the beginning and I allowed myself to fall in love with you and let things get as far as they did and—"

"I knew better as well, I just…I wanted you for so long and I had no idea you felt that way."

"So because you wanted me you thought it would just be okay? Lucas, wow, you are more of an ass than I thought."

He had finally removed the beanie from his head and his hair was long and shaggy and pointing in every direction. I couldn't breathe for a moment and we were interrupted as the front door swung open and the hint of apples invaded the house.

"Well, well, well…look what the cat dragged in."

"Hmmm…if it isn't my favorite red."

I took the carving knife in my hand and brought it down hard as I began to cut the potatoes. Tonight was going to be a long night.

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><p><strong>Thoughts? I am actually looking really forward to writing this one! :)<br>**


	2. New Beginnings

**PLEASE READ FIRST: So this chapter is in Lucas's POV…whew…**

**A little background: I am about to open up some personal experiences and memories through the eyes of Brooke and Lucas…like I said a lot of inspiration came to me to do this story and well it was my relationship with a guy of four struggling years of hell…so how Lucas is in this story is very similar to the love of my life who destroyed my heart…lol…but anyways so how Lucas's mind works when I write in his POV…is pretty much how my ex was….so I hope that clarifies his behavior and especially his thought process as how they are going to be two completely different things! So thanks guys!**

**A/N: WOW…the reviews are absolutely amazing! I wasn't going to post a second chapter yet so quickly but damn you guys are on top of it! So comments to your reviews!  
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**D: I am so glad that you are excited about this story…guess what me too! **

**Brucas4Ever12: thanks….I think this will be a great one!**

**CaseyJr: YAY! I am so glad that you feel this will be a great story! I think I am going to have so much writing this one and trust me Chase will be back…because come on…we have to have Lucas play overprotective, crazy, jealous…I am going to kick your ass kind of guy ;)**

**BrucasEqlsluv: I agree with you on everything you said! I can not stand Brooke to be weak or extremely forgiving towards Lucas…he put her through so much on the show that I never make it easy for her (that's why it takes forever in my other stories sorry) BUT I am so glad that you are in love with this story. I love how I am writing Brooke she is the embodiment of vulnerable and feisty at the same time…it's great! And yes I am going to try and stay away mostly from the sappiness my other stories are bumming me out! But there will be lots of flashbacks to get us to oh so that's how it happened…rant all day if you need too..I love it!**

**dianehermans: yes Brooke will not make it easy for Lucas…the flashbacks will only get hotter as well as the present ;)**

**justgoldworthy: you know I didn't think about adding Clay into this story…but I did have Quinn in mind…but I'm not sure…I want to keep it at a minimal of characters but I would love to see some who is the bigger, badder, tougher man between Clay and Lucas…and yes a bond that Lucas and Haley have would be an interesting twist to develop between Clay and Brooke…hmmm..the gages are working in my brain! I'll get back to ya!**

**pam: as always thank you thank you thank you!**

**sunshine: yes I immediately knew what I wanted the title to be! Classic Brucas. Yes I think I am MORE excited about writing Lucas as this hot dick/brooder. CMM was hot as Nick…loved him in that. Brooke I don't think is sad…I mean in a way yes….but haven't you ever just caved and knew it was wrong but you couldn't help yourself? I feel that, that is what Brooke did and a little secret…I am basing Brooke and Lucas sort of off me and my ex…so yes I was sad in giving into temptation! Lol…but I don't think that Lucas was using her and flashbacks as well as his thoughts will probably help that out in future chapters! And ah the Brachel relationship you'll love it in this story.**

**XHush-HushX: Thank you as always…one of my cherished readers **

**ImAnon: Thank you! Yes Lucas is kind of a bad boy…and I love bad boys…and he is definitely complex…in my story he is a hybrid of the Lucas on the show and my version as well…so basically the man of my dream ;) lol…**

**craxygirl54: trust me when I say he is only going to get more incredibly sexy throughout the story and it is going to be so damn hard for Brooke to refuse him…and yes this story is a breath of fresh air from my two other sappy/angsty ones so thank you! **

**OTHCharmfan: Brooke will in no way forgive him easily or quickly…the banter will only continue…and oh Hales…she is one of my favorites to write! She will burst into Mom mode a lot as well as keeping Lucas in line **

**Alysef: This will be a good, fun read…or at least I think it will be. The relationship and banter between Brooke and Lucas will be fun! Rachel isn't really an ex, but she has had sex with Lucas…so yeah sometimes it might get a little awkward between Brooke, Rachel, and Lucas, but it's always going to be fun as this next chapter will play out! Lol**

**ENJOY!**

**Chapter 2: New Beginnings**

I know how to keep my composure unlike the delicious Brooke Davis who stood in front of me for the first time in years. I really didn't care about the blonde twit next to me so I quickly dismissed her. Brooke was even more beautiful and sexy than I remembered. She transformed into this mature woman than from the girl she used to be. College and time away from me did her good.

I always enjoyed messing with her; it's what made our friendship back then so strong. She would keep me in line and I would try to bring out the wild child I knew she was, and I truly did love her. I don't believe in those types of feelings and when she told me she was in love with me, I nearly lost it. It scared the hell out of me. That's how I ended up in Peyton's bed. It was stupid, don't get me wrong, but if there was something I could do to make her hate me or not be in love with me anymore, I was going to do it, because I couldn't tell her that I didn't love her either or that I _did_ love her. I couldn't say those words out loud because damn it I do love her. I'm an ass okay, but don't judge me. I don't understand why I wouldn't embrace those kinds of feelings, my mom taught me that love is one of the most important things in life, but after seeing her get destroyed by many men she attempted to be with, I realized that love doesn't exist and love is just a word, not a feeling, but damn that girl, she made me believe in love, but my ego is too big to allow her to love me and allow myself to love her.

Of course teasing her all day was fun and I love to watch her squirm but she was surprising me. She was playing back and trying to keep her composure, but I knew she was battling an inner demon that she was gradually losing against. Walking in on her while she was in the shower was a little much but having her hands on me when she grabbed me made me want her even more. Her body was ten times better than it used to be, her skin was so damn soft, and she almost seemed like a completely different person.

I desperately wanted to be the nice guy she truly believed I was or even could be, but I felt that I was always going to lose that battle with her.

"So because you wanted me you thought it would just be okay? Lucas, wow, you are more of an ass than I thought."

I didn't know what to say to that because I didn't want her thinking that I was using her because it wasn't like that but I knew I had made a mistake by taking it as far as I let it. I was going to say something, anything but we were interrupted by a siren I had missed all these years.

"Well, well, well…look what the cat dragged in." Her words were like ice, I grinned and turned to face her.

"Hmmm…if it isn't my favorite red." I walked over to her and pulled her into my arms.

I heard Brooke start cutting the potatoes pretty roughly and I knew it was getting to her. So I figured I would play it up a bit.

"So how is my sexy red doing?" I still had my arms around her waist. I could see Brooke looking out of the corner of her eye and she quickly turned back to her task.

"I'm great, dickhead, and you?" Rachel knew what I was doing so she decided to play along and threw her arms around my neck.

Being this close to her reminded me of just how amazing our sex used to be, and that was great because it was always just sex with us.

"I'm doing pretty well now."

"Rachel, why don't you start doing what you said you were going to do!" Brooke turned around and held out a bowl of cake batter from the fridge.

Rachel smirked and released herself from my grasp. Yes, it's working. Brooke is already eating all of it up.

"Okay okay, I was just catching up with an old lay."

"Hey, I would prefer for you to call me by name." I said sounding hurt. I walked over to the two girls and stood between them.

"Whatever." They both said and I couldn't help the huge smile on my face.

I started taking the salmon fillets from Brooke and she smacked my hand.

"Just go do something else. Haley, Rachel, and I got this." Brooke never once looked at me.

"Whatever you say pretty girl." I let it linger in her ear as I walked away.

"Damn it, stop calling me that!" She called out and I went into their common area and cut the TV on just in time for Nathan and Haley to come around the corner both with wet heads.

"I guess this is something I am going to have to get used to…_again." _Even though I was okay with them being together, knowing in the back of my mind that they were having sex just grossed me out. I still thought of Haley as like a sister so it was just weird, but ultimately I knew that Haley was being taken care of and as well as my brother.

"Have you seen the backyard yet?" Nathan asked me as Haley walked into the kitchen and said hello to Rachel.

"No, Brooke didn't let it get that far."

"You're a big boy Luke, you have two feet."

I rolled my eyes.

"God, I've missed you!" I said to her and I could feel her eye roll.

Nathan shook his head and we walked down the hallway by the stairs and out a backdoor that led to their backyard. I was impressed. You wouldn't expect this from the front of the house, but they had a pool and a small basketball court behind it.

"This is pretty impressive. Was this here when you moved in?" I pointed to the court.

"Ha, hell no, the pool was but with some of the inheritance money from Dan, I had the basketball court put in…it's nothing special, but it gets the job done." He ran over and grabbed a ball from the small storage shed off to the side. He tossed it to me.

"Do you miss it?" He asked me.

I instinctually reached my hand over my heart and gave him a crooked smile.

"Everyday." I bounced the ball once and shot for the goal, nothing but net.

"Nice." Nathan ran after the ball and began to dribble it.

"So…" He began.

I really didn't want to get into this.

"Nate, I thought we weren't going to talk about this." I held my hands out for the ball and he tossed it over to me.

"Oh just like how we never talked about you and Brooke."

Ouch, but true. After what happened I refused to talk about it…but Nathan knew me better than anyone else and if I didn't want to talk about it, it was pretty serious to me and Nathan didn't talk to me for almost two months after I broke Brooke's heart.

"Whatever man, one of these days you are going to have to talk about these things whether it's to me, Haley…hell even Brooke."

I dribbled the ball a few times and when I looked back towards the house, I could see into the kitchen window and see the three girls in a heated argument….my money was on the topic of me. It's not because I wish to believe it's about me…I just know.

"Wow…you know I tried to believe it wasn't true, but you are beginning to prove me wrong."

"What?" I turned back to face him.

"Have you not been listening to a word I've been saying or are you too busy staring at Brooke?"

I threw the ball back at him hard.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"You _love_ her…it was obvious then…but you are just too much of a jackass to let someone as amazing as Brooke in…I mean do you really just like being alone?"

I furrowed my brow and pinched the bridge of my nose.

"I am not in love with her."

"Whoa…I didn't say in love…I just said you love her."

I shook my head.

"What the hell is the difference?"

He caught me…but I was never going to admit it.

"Wow…you've got issues." He tossed the ball into the goal and made it without even trying.

I didn't want to talk about this. I don't talk about my feelings and I wasn't going to start now especially here. We started a friendly game of horse as Nate wasn't going to allow me to play any rougher. Damn this stupid heart condition, damn Dan Scott to hell.

"_BITCH!"_

I dropped the ball as Nathan and I both looked towards the house.

"Should we?" Nathan questioned.

"Hell yes!"

We both hurried inside to see a full on cat fight break out between Brooke and Rachel as Haley attempted to break the two apart. We stood there and enjoyed every minute of it.

"Jesus, put your dicks away and help me break this up!" Haley shouted and Nathan and I exchanged looks.

I went for Brooke and Nathan tried to get Rachel. In one swift motion I wrapped my arms around Brooke's waist as she still had a handful of red hair clutched tightly in her hand.

"Brooke let go." I exclaimed.

"NEVER!" She screamed.

Rachel tried to pry Brooke's hand free from her hair but it was no use. Haley got in between them and was finally able to get Rachel's hair from Brooke's grasp. Nathan pulled Rachel as far away from Brooke as possible.

Brooke's head fell back against my chest and it felt so good to have her in my arms again. I brought my mouth to her ear.

"That was so sexy, pretty girl."

She scoffed and began to fight me as she turned in my arms and started pushing me away. I reluctantly let her go.

"What was that all about?" Nathan asked as he still felt it was not safe to let Rachel go.

"Should I tell them or should you!" Rachel spat out at Brooke.

"Don't!" Brooke and Haley said together.

Nathan and I exchanged a look and Brooke just walked away and hurried up the stairs.

"Rachel, I'll never understand you." Haley ran after Brooke and Rachel released herself from Nathan's arms.

"Rachel, what the hell did you do?" Nathan asked.

Rachel looked over at me, smirked and turned back to Nathan.

"Come on you guys, you know how me and Brookie are." She walked over to the fridge and pulled out a beer.

I motioned to her to get me one and she tossed me the one that was already in her hand.

"Come on red, what did you say to her?" I will not forget the first day Rachel made her presence known to Tree Hill.

_I love cheerleaders. Nathan and I decided to hang out with Brooke and Peyton during the tryouts to give our opinions on the fresh, hot girl that could take the last slot on the squad._

"_Sorry am I too late?" _

_All of our attention snapped to the fiery redhead that strode like she owned the place to the front of the table wearing nothing but a two piece that showed off every favorite part of a woman's body I enjoyed. She winked at me. I winked back._

"_I'm Rachel by the way." She walked over to me and held out her hand for me to take._

"_Pleasure's all mine." I said. She kinked her eyebrow and I wasn't about to give her my name that easily._

"_Excuse me but you are not trying out for __**him**_**. **_You are here for the cheerleading squad." Brooke snapped at her and I couldn't help but smirk._

"_Okay you are late and now I feel like you are wasting my time, so if you would rather make googly eyes at blondie over there rather than do your tryout, I have better things to do." Brooke snapped her book closed and I had to admit I enjoyed seeing this side of Brooke._

"_I'm ready for my tryout." She placed her attention to Brooke and pulled out a CD._

"_What is this?" Brooke asked._

"_I brought my own music. It's how I play." Rachel placed her CD into the stereo and hit play. _

"_This should be interesting." Nathan whispered to me. I nodded as we both kept our eyes glued to the red in front of us._

_I felt my pants become instantly too tight for my liking. That girl belonged on a pole not a high school cheerleading squad. She kept eye fucking the shit out of me and I only reciprocated it. _

"_Dude look at Brooke's face." _

_It was hard for me to take my eyes off the redhead in front of me but to see Brooke's face was priceless. Brooke realized that she met her match when it came to the battle of top dog in the school. Brooke's mouth dropped as Rachel dropped to her knees and began to grind slowly and Peyton laughed at Brooke whose mouth, if it was even possible, dropped lower. _

_The song was over as Rachel fell seductively into a split…I knew in that moment that I was going to find my way in between those legs._

_Brooke held her hand over her mouth and shook her head. Rachel jumped up quickly._

"_I'd like to thank you on behalf of myself and the group and I hope we passed the audition."_

"_I'm sorry, what?" Brooke let out harshly._

"_John Lennon." Peyton chimed in. Peyton was impressed by the redhead which was hard to do. Brooke looked over at her confused, "The Let It Be album. Girl knows her music."_

_Rachel nodded towards Peyton and this chic was becoming hotter by the second._

"_Too bad she was late, sorry Betty was it? We'll be in touch." _

"_It's Rachel and I hope so." _

"_Hey number 3, want to show me where my chemistry class is." _

"_My pleasure." I knocked knuckles with Nathan and winked at Brooke. _

_She huffed at me and I held two thumbs up at her to let her know she had to place her on the team._

I smirked over at Rachel as she closed the fridge and started drinking her beer.

"What did you do Rachel?" Nathan asked as he crossed his arms.

"Nothing. It was nothing." She placed her beer on the counter and started tearing the strings off the green beans.

Nathan shook his head and ran after the two girls who were doing God knows what upstairs. I walked over to her and stood beside her.

"Come on…it's just me and you. What did you say to upset Brooke?"

"Why do you care?" She bitterly asked as she continued messing with the beans.

"I've always cared…in one way or another." I found myself sometimes opening up to Rachel a little at a time and she understood and never opened her mouth about it to anyone.

"Wow, you have always had a great way of showing it." She scoffed at me and I rolled my eyes.

"Look I still don't even understand how you two became friends at all, but it's really weird." I drank more of my beer and she slapped me across the face.

"What the _fuck_ was that for?" I hissed at her.

"You know I _always_ knew you were an ass hole and Brooke, bless her, but she just couldn't help it. She actually believed that _you_ could be someone better…but wishful thinking on her part, I guess and that was her mistake."

If I could slap a girl, I would have done it. She has no idea who the hell I am or what I am capable of, and for her to even think that I don't care at all, well maybe I had been wrong about her.

"You're just stupid and selfish. You may lie to her and hell even yourself but deep down you knew how she felt and you used her up until you got what you wanted from her. It must have been some conquest for you. You are just like every other guy. You want the poor, helpless, innocent virgin and you would do what it takes to get what you want and then toss it away."

I had never heard her speak to me like this before. Rachel and I were never close, but we were one in the same and I couldn't believe what I was hearing from her.

"You have no fucking idea what the hell you are talking about. You don't know me and you sure as hell don't know how I feel about Brooke either, so whatever it is you are telling her or what you believe, you are full of shit!" I spat out at her and walked away from her towards the door.

"Do what you do best, Scott, walk away…this time around try to stay away from best friends of Brooke…hell even bar sluts you are used to fucking."

I slammed the door behind me and started walking down the street. If there was one thing I hated about people was their judgment of me. Yes, I was an ass hole, yes I would sleep around a bit, but that doesn't mean anything about me. Did anyone ever take their time in getting to know me or try to see past that part of me? No, never, although I would never make it easy on anyone. That was one rule I always taught myself: never let your guard down. Make people fight for you, to earn your respect and gratitude. There were only a few people in the world that saw that in me and they were all in the house behind me, the only problem was I destroyed the only person who ever truly mattered in every way possible: my Brooke.

"_I'll give you my cookie for that PB&J." I held my sandwich out to her and her face fell._

"_I do like cookies, but I want to keep my sandwich." Her face fell a little bit and my friend Haley chimed into the conversation._

"_I have an extra sandwich, Brookie. My sister didn't want it so you can have it." _

_I smiled at my friend and turned back to the girl sitting beside Haley._

"_Okay, but only this once." She handed her sandwich over to me and I gave her my cookie that my mom made._

"_Thanks! I'm Lucas." I smiled at her._

"_Brooke Penelope Davis." She insisted on using her full name and I laughed at her._

"_Well if you are Haley's friend then I guess you can be mine too. Nice to meet you." I used my manners that my mom had taught me and she smiled as these little indents on her cheeks appeared making me smile._

"_Thanks." She said._

Even at thirteen years old, I knew that Brooke Davis was something special and I would spend every day protecting her from ass holes and jerks, only to allow myself to be that person I tried so hard to protect her from.

I sat on the curb outside their house and finished the one beer I had. I should have gotten more to help me forget…

I heard feet rustle behind me and I immediately knew who it was.

"So I am guessing Ray told you what happened?"

I shook my head forcefully.

"No, she was just a bitch as usual."

She laughed behind me as Rachel was not her favorite person but apparently she meant a lot to Brooke and that was all that mattered.

"Yeah…well that's Rachel but in the end she takes care of Brooke and always has her back."

We sat in silence for awhile and without looking at her I spoke.

"Is she okay?"

"Yes, Brooke is fine. Brooke and Rachel can get into these heated arguments that sometimes lead to physical fighting but they immediately get over it. It's like you and Nathan sometimes, it's really strange, but they always work it out and laugh it off." She giggled and let out a long sigh.

"Lucas, what's on your mind?" She started drawing circles on my back and I closed my eyes.

"Tell me what you think about what happened between me and Brooke. I know we never talked about it. So tell me what _you_ think." I didn't want to see the disappointed look on her face. It was one of those looks that crushed me.

"I think you were both stupid, selfish, and naïve, but I think you knew better more than her. Lucas, you don't believe in love and for you to go after one of your best friends like that, and Brooke of all people, you knew better but you just couldn't help yourself."

My head fell and shit, yes, I did know better, and I don't know, I saw how Brooke could be with other guys, I mean it would always make my blood boil and my skin crawl when she would sit next to a guy and play footsie with them or run her fingers so gently over a guy's arm, I thought it would be harmless to get attention like that from her as well.

"I'm sorry." I said quietly.

"It's Brooke you should be apologizing too." She released her hand from my back.

"No, I am sorry for disappointing you Hales."

"You both disappointed me, but Brooke and I have had this talk too. I told her that if anything she teased you a little bit and we all know you can't help yourself in that way." She clasped her hands together and looked over at me and for the first time her sitting next to me I made eye contact.

"Really? You said that to her?" I grinned.

"Wipe that grin off your face Lucas. Brooke was always a major flirt and I mean I noticed things, Nathan even noticed things, but for you to go after one of your best friends like that…you just shouldn't have done it no matter how tempting it was for you."

We sat in silence for a little while longer. Haley and I sat out on the curb and just talked about the past few years. I only ever really spent time with her and Nathan on the holidays and they made a trip out to New York once for a basketball game. Brooke and I never crossed paths once. She was never in Tree Hill around the holidays. She would always visit my mom during the week or most weekends since Durham isn't that far from Tree Hill. Her holidays were spent luxuriously with her parents in California. So to avoid me, she would make sure she never got a chance to see me, and I never blamed her for that.

"Come on, Luke. I am sure dinner is almost ready especially if we left Nathan alone with those two."

I held my hand out for Haley and helped her up from her spot on the curb. We walked back into the house and seeing Rachel and Brooke laughing and having a good time almost made the fight earlier seem like a dream.

"We thought you two had gotten lost or something." Nathan walked over to Haley and pulled her into a kiss.

"Okay brother alert here! Don't do that in front of me…it's still too weird." As I was walking towards the fridge for another beer, Brooke was slightly walking backwards and didn't see me.

She would have dropped the entire contents of food she had in her hands if I didn't catch her from bumping into me. I felt her body jolt as my hands came in contact with her waist.

"You were going to bump into me. So I helped prevent you from dropping what looks like an amazing meal you've made tonight." I was going to ease up on the torture for awhile especially after hearing everything Rachel and Haley had to share.

"Thanks." She said as she looked over her shoulder quickly and then walked away from me.

"Okay who's drinking what?" I called out.

"Wine!" Rachel, Haley, and Brooke said together.

"Beer!" Nathan shouted.

I grinned and pulled out a few beers and the bottle of Chardonnay. I reached for three wine glasses and walked over to the dining room table. I poured each lady in my life a glass and they all thanked me. I somehow managed to get a seat next to Brooke with Nathan on my other side.

"Okay I want to say a few words!" Haley said and the rest of us groaned a little.

"Hey, HEY!" She snapped and there it was her mom mode.

"This is the first time since high school we are all here together."

"You're forgetting Peyton." Rachel said as she inhaled her entire glass of wine.

"Peyton doesn't count right now." Haley snapped back.

My face fell at the mention of Peyton and Brooke tensed up beside me. I didn't even realize what I was doing, but I slowly reached over and gave her thigh an apologetic squeeze. She brushed my hand away.

"Anyways everyone that _matters_ is here and I just want to say that we are all different people now….well most of us."

We all knew she was specifically excluding Rachel. Rachel helped herself to another glass of wine.

"I just want to say to new beginnings!" She held her glass up and we all tipped our drinks together and started eating the food.

Casual conversations began to take place between the four in front of me. They were talking about college and how I should enroll in some of the writing classes Duke has to offer and I didn't think it was a bad idea. New York was something I was trying to forget right now and with my withdrawal from NYU, Duke would be something fresh.

"So Lukie why are you here and not in New York?" Rachel was on the verge of being drunk and I rolled my eyes at her.

"New York isn't what I want anymore." I quickly said and Nathan gave me a sad look.

Nathan was the only one who really knows why I left New York and it wasn't something I was ever going to share with the group.

"Sure it is." Rachel said as she killed the rest of her wine.

"Okay wine-o no more booze for you." Brooke took her glass away.

We began to clean up our dirty dishes and the kitchen.

"I'll drive her home." Haley stated.

"I am fine! I can walk."

"The hell you're not!" Nathan and I said together.

"Awe my boys! Wanting to take such good care of me."

Haley shot Nathan a look.

"Maybe I should go with you two before Haley decides to ditch your body in the ocean. We'll be back in a few guys!"

The three of them left and Brooke was attending to a pot she was scrubbing.

"So have you talked to her?" She asked quietly. I leaned against the kitchen island behind her with my arms crossed.

"Are you referring to Peyton?" I asked her.

She nodded and I could see her whole body tense from behind.

"No."

"So you don't talk to her at all?"

"I haven't seen or spoken to her since graduation." I walked over to stand next to her and I took the pot from her as she was near to scrubbing the Teflon off it.

"Why don't you go upstairs…do whatever girly thing you want. I think you've done enough hard work today."

She looked at me surprised and gave me a small-dimpled smile.

"Thanks." She began to walk away and stopped at the foot of the stairs.

"Lucas, what happened in New York?" She asked me so softly and the sound of her small voice gave me goose bumps.

"Goodnight Brooke."

"Goodnight Lucas."

I heard the disappointment in her voice. She walked up the stairs and I heard the faint close of a door.

My phone started buzzing in my pants and I reached for it.

_**Lana **_

It flashed across the screen and I ignored the call. I can't believe she had the nerve to call me after what happened. I went back to cleaning the rest of the dishes waiting for Nathan and Haley to return.

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><p><strong>Thoughts? Dun dun duuunnn...<strong>

******So a small crossover here if you don't know who this Lana person is I may be referring too...lol...I am using her because I absolutely loathed that character! And this secret that Lucas is keeping has nothing to do with the him being in love with Lana or anything but it is something important and Lucas took it very seriously...can any of you guess what his secret is? **

**Stay tuned! **


	3. Fun in the Sun

**A/N: It's because I love you guys so much...here's another chapter...I really should have been reading Eco, but instead I put that off to write one ore chapter for you. There's sort of a lot in it, but I think it was worth it! Yes the Lana in my story is from Smallville and we will get a lot of flashbacks from Lucas with her in it! Also Lucas I initially just had Lucas have one secret...but now he has two...so he has secrets he's keeping from Brooke...but they will come out!  
><strong>

**Replies to feedback:**

_**Lanae96:**_ **So you got your wish in this chapter ;). And trust me Lucas will eventually tell Brooke how he feels about her, but that will be several chapters away.**

**_XHush-HushX:_** **you were right Lana from** **Smallville, one of my least favorite characters even more hate for her than Peyton. Let's just say what she did didn't hurt his male ego. You will get to see a lot more into Lucas's head!**

_**BrucasEqlsluv:**_**Yes Brooke and Rachel fought but they got over it...that's what I love about them or writing about them! I don't think that Haley was necessarily putting any blame on Brooke but the fact she thought it wasn't fair to berate Lucas continually and not get a little upset with Brooke too (or maybe that is the same thing). I mean we all know what kind of flirt Brooke is! ****lol. Yeah Lucas definitely caved and broke a cardinal rule and made the moves on his best friend! Sleeze...I'm glad you love this story! YAY**

**_dianehermans:_ thank you so much! Lana isn't his doctor...but that's all I'll say about that! ;)**

**_OTHCharmfan: _lashbacks are always fun for me to write and especially with this story there are endless possibilities for this story and trust me there will be tons of those especially in chapter 3! There will be more of Rachel too!**

**_craxygirl54: _Luke's secret is a good one it's kind of a two-parter secret! dun dun dun...**

**_pam:_the secret is good and it's a two-part secret...I think I will bring Clay in this story maybe in the next chapter or a later chapter. I like the idea of having Clay and Lucas have like a macho man who's badder or tougher thing. Brooke is learning to control her anger around others when it comes to Lucas...or at least I feel like she will...I'm glad you agree with Lana being a bitch! Hoorah! This chapter has lots of boys and jealous Lucas is in true form!**

**_ImAnon:_Yes this story is partially based on my personal experiences and I am writing my ex in true form through Lucas. Brooke has a little bit of me in her as well, but I am trying to keep Brooke, Brooke. lol. There are several sides to Lucas and they will all come out especially in this chapter! **

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><p><strong>Chapter 3: Fun in the Sun<br>**

**You say that I'm messing with you head**

**All 'cause I was making out with your friend**

**Love hurts whether it's right or wrong**

**I can't stop cause I'm having too much fun**

**All my life I've been good but now I'm thinking what the hell?**

**-"What The Hell"-Avril Lavigne**

_His hand runs up my thigh and I can't help the shiver that courses throughout my entire body. His touch, his warmth, the roughness of his fingertips makes my soft skin tingle in every way possible. _

_I reach behind me and run my fingers through his rough hair and I yank harder to force his mouth to attack my neck. His arms wrap around me from behind pulling me close to his chest. His right hand quickly attaches to one of my breasts as the other finds its way into my panties. God, I love this man. I love everything about him. _

_His fingers begin to work its magic on my sensitive clit. I lean back against his shoulder and I pull his lips to mine. I let my entire mouth devour him. His sweet, salty tongue licked and played with every inch inside of my mouth and I found my eyes rolling in the back of head. His grip on me tightens and he lets two fingers slip inside of me easily and I moan in his mouth. His hard dick digs into my backside. I turned in his arms so my front side was facing his. I let my hands roam all over his body._

"_Hmmm…Lucas." I turned over and I was now on top of him. He released his fingers from me and his tongue dived deeper into my mouth.  
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_"Fuck Lucas, don't stop."  
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"Open your eyes pretty girl."

I opened my eyes and something felt weird…his hands reached up under my shirt and he dragged his fingers up and down my back and his mouth...that fucking mouth I thought I would long forget about was attached to my neck and it made its way up to my lips and for a moment I wasn't sure if this was still a dream or not.

Then I became aware of the fact that…yep…this was no longer a dream as his masculine hands…hands that I love so much reached down and squeezed my ass roughly bringing me closer to him as I straddled his waist.

He grinned against my lips and I began to look around us. He was fully clothed, I was half naked, and he was in my bed.

"WHAT THE FUCK!" I screamed as I quickly jumped away from him pulling the covers over me as much as I could to cover every inch of myself.

He turned on his side and placed his hand on stomach. I wanted to get out of the bed but I had nothing I could wrap around me beside the sheet he was still sitting upon.

"What the hell are you doing in my room?" I demanded of him.

"Well I knocked several times, but you didn't answer. So I walked through your bathroom door to find you in what looked like a really, really sexy wet dream." His hand started moving up and down my covered stomach and I smacked his hand away.

"And!"

"You called out my name. Twice...and told me to not stop." He smirked and placed his hand back on my stomach and I froze.

"And that gives you the right to take advantage of me like that?" I was livid.

"Brooke, you had your hand down your pants…and you think I am not going to join in on that? Besides I could have turned your dream into reality." He looked up at him and I went to gouge his eyes out.

"AGH! Okay okay!" He shooed my hands away and sat upright on the bed.

"Damn! I brought you breakfast." He pointed over to the tray on my nightstand that had the latest fashion magazine, eggs, bacon, and a cup of coffee. He got up off the bed.

"It felt good to have you on my lips again." He ran his fingers over his lips as he smiled.

"Thanks for a good morning, Brooke." He winked, walked out my bedroom door this time and closed it behind him.

I leaned back down in my bed pulling the sheet over my face and I let out a small squeal. I didn't realize how much I had missed everything about him. His body, his touch, those hands…and that mouth…that sexy mouth that did things that I thought were never possible. I needed to get a padlock to my bathroom door so he couldn't sneak into my room. I pulled the sheet back and looked over at the breakfast tray he brought in.

I reached for the magazine and sure enough it was the newest issue of Vogue that I have yet to read. I grinned at the fact that he has remembered the simplest things about me. Surprisingly the breakfast was still warm and I immediately reached for the cup of coffee. He made it just the way I liked it. Damn him for still remembering those little things. I closed my eyes to remember the moment he asked me.

"_Since when do you drink coffee?" I asked him as he reached for a cup and poured him a large amount of black coffee._

"_Since Rachel keeps me up all fucking night." He reached his hand behind his neck and I cringed._

"_Please…I do not want any details of you and Little Red Riding Slut." _

_He laughed and looked up at me._

"_I like that. I may just have to use it in our next—"_

"_Lucas Scott shut your damn mouth! It would figure you would mess around with my sworn enemy." I sat the Vogue magazine I had in my hand down and he made his way over to sit next to me at the kitchen bar._

_Lucas had a key to my place…obviously just like my other three friends did. My parents had allowed me to stay in our house by myself if I abided by the rules of Karen Roe and Lydia James. The two women who I considered more of mothers than my own would stop by occasionally unannounced to check up on me. I loved them more every single time they did proving to me that there is such a thing as motherly love. He somehow managed to sneak into my house during the middle of the night and I found him face down on my couch. _

"_It's just sex, pretty girl, nothing more or less." _

"_And you're okay with that?" I realized that, that was probably the stupidest question I ever asked him as he pulled his lips away from the coffee to give me that look…that look that said you're kidding right._

"_That was stupid of me. Of course you are okay with that." _

"_Well just know you are always my number one girl." He ran his hand roughly through my hair and I swatted him away._

_No, if I was your number one girl Lucas Scott, it would be me in your bed, not **her**._

"_Whatever, we're going to be late for school. You driving?" I asked him as I hopped off my bar stool._

"_Sure. Wait how do you take your coffee?" He asked me and I furrowed my brow._

"_Well…I am taking a liking to coffee…so for future coffee runs…how do you take yours?" _

_I smiled and shook my head._

"_Two creams." _

I finished the food he brought me which was always delicious and I took my coffee in my hand and made my way down the stairs. It was Lazy Sunday…we all called it. Sure enough, Nathan was sitting on the couch with Haley's legs across his lap as he clumsily ran his hand up and down her legs. Lucas sat opposite them in an arm chair and had a cup of coffee as well. They were all laughing at something Lucas said and I walked over and made Nathan scoot over a little as I was not going to sit anywhere near Lucas after what happened this morning. Haley's feet rested in my lap and I tickled one of them.

"Did Rachel cool down when you took her home last night?" I asked feeling Lucas's eyes bore into me.

"Yes…she just drank too much which normally means bitchy Rachel comes out. She tried to kiss Nathan." Haley spat out.

"She just couldn't stand not ever getting with the other Scott." Lucas winked at Haley as she rolled her eyes.

"Trust me there were some times she tried really hard." Nathan said and Haley leaned up and smacked lightly on the arm.

"Hales, come on it was before you and I started dating!" He said nursing his arm.

"So what's the plan today?" Lucas asked.

"Well its Sunday which usually means we don't really do anything but lie around and be lazy." Nathan said still rubbing his hand up and down Haley's legs.

"Oh come on guys! I've never been here, the least you can do is show me around or something. Please?"

Nathan, Haley and I exchanged a look. If there was a possible way for me to ignore Lucas today, it would make me very happy. I am still trying to get over what happened this morning in my bed.

"We could go to the beach." Haley offered.

Damn it. The beach was one of my weaknesses…BUT could totally be at my advantage as well. Hot half naked boys. Yes!

"That's a fantastic idea!" I chimed in finishing off the rest of my coffee.

"It's settled." Lucas said and winked at me. I gave him a disgusted face like a school girl would if a boy tried to give her cooties.

We decided to give everyone an hour to get ready. Which meant that Haley and Nathan wanted to get fool around before we headed to a public place which might I add never stopped them before but with Lucas here it was a little different now.

I walked over to my chest of drawers and opened the top left one to reveal piles and piles of bikinis. I knew exactly which one I wanted to wear to drive Lucas wild. I reached for the plum colored two-piece. The bottoms barely covered anything and I was just glad that I maintained little Brooke because if not there was no possible way I could wear it. The top was strapless and in the center of my breasts the material twisted leaving pretty nothing to the imagination and covering what needed to be covered…barely. Lucky for me this fashionable two hundred dollar bathing suit was made to hug the body and keep everything in secure.

I grinned at myself as I locked my bedroom door and barricaded my bathroom door with a chair. I quickly undressed and put the barely there bathing suit on. I French braided my hair into two small pigtails. This would definitely drive him crazy. I grabbed my cover and placed my feet into a pair of beach sandals. I grabbed my towel and tanning oil and walked out of my bedroom to be met with the body of a Greek God. Lucas had on a pair of dark blue swim trunks that only enhanced his baby blue eyes. His hair was ruffled around his face and he had on his aviators. I could feel his eyes on me and his lips were parted barely. I could feel his wink behind the lenses of his glasses. Lucky for him I was going to make him wait until we were at the beach for him to get an eyeful of Brooke Davis in her finest.

I walked straight past him downstairs to find Nathan and Haley flirting at the kitchen table. I rolled my eyes and Nathan had already packed the cooler full of the essentials…chocolate, beer, and snacks.

"Let's go! I haven't seen the beach in months." Lucas smacked his towel on me and I punched him in his bare chest.

He smiled and Haley snapped in mom mode again. We locked up and headed to Nathan's black Jeep. The boys took the doors and top off as the weather was perfect for driving the Jeep naked. I grabbed Haley's hand and made her sit in the backseat with me. She laughed at me because she knew I was trying to distance myself from Lucas.

We drove for about fifteen minutes until we made it to the beach and I let out of huge sigh of relief as there were several hot bodies to use to make Lucas jealous. We all carried what we needed and headed to "our spot".

Lucas placed his towel down first, then I laid mine next to his, Haley was on my other side, and Nathan camped out next to her. If I was going to use other guys to make Lucas jealous we shouldn't have set up our arrangement the way we did. Haley and I were sandwiched in between the two guys and it made us look like we were taken…or at least me anyways and I'm not!

I rested on my knees and it was show time. I reached for the hem of my cover up and pulled it slowly up and over my body. I immediately heard the low growl in Lucas's throat and I smirked to myself.

"Damn Brooke!" I heard Nathan choke out.

"Brooke you may as well came to the beach naked." Haley said.

I didn't hear anything from Lucas and I was almost upset by that. So I just ignored it and went about my business. I started applying my tanning lotion and of course couldn't reach my back.

"Lucas would you mind?" I asked him.

I turned to face him as he held his book over his crotch. I knew it! He was pretty much sporting a hard on for me. He laid the book over his dick and reached for the lotion.

"With pleasure." He said his voice an octave lower.

I lay on my stomach and he straddled me with his slightly hard dick digging into my butt as his hands worked my back. He took his time and I couldn't lie when I say I didn't enjoy every moment of it. His fingers slid up under my bathing suit to cover the flesh the fabric hid. As his hands glided down my sides to make sure he got every inch as possible, his hands grazed the sides of my boobs slowly.

"Lucas, that's enough!" Haley piped in and I immediately came back to reality.

"What! She asked me to do her back."

"Yes her back! Not her side boob."

I quickly started to wiggle underneath him and he removed himself. I smiled at him and began to sunbathe. I figured I would wait to get a rise out of Lucas; there was no need to rush anything as we would be out here for hours. Lucas went back to reading his book and I let the sun bathe my skin as Haley and Nathan carried on a conversation about doing a date night.

"Hmm…I think I'm going to jump in the ocean. Any takers?" I asked as I stood up and stretched.

"I'll join ya." Lucas placed his book down on his towel and stretched as well. He reached his hand down for me to take and pulled me up.

"Lucas, keep your hands to yourself." Haley pointed sternly.

"Yes _mom_." He said.

We started to walk away but Haley spoke up again.

"Oh and play nice!"

"We got it mother!" I hollered back.

Fun time. I dove into the water and as I emerged I made sure I resurfaced from the water slowly and sensually. I ran my hands through my hair and down my body. When I opened my eyes Lucas was wading ankles deep and staring at me like I've never seen before.

"You do realize that you are playing a dangerous game." He said as he walked slowly towards me.

"I'm not playing any games Lucas…that's what _you_ do." I had to keep my cool and under any circumstances could not let him realize that indeed I was playing a game.

"Then why are you constantly teasing me."

"It's not teasing, Lucas. I love my body and I'll show it off if I want to." I said. That wasn't very clever but I didn't know what else to say.

He got closer to me.

"I can see that." He was so close that his breath hit my face.

I went to walk past him but his arms wrapped around my waist and tossed me into the water.

"Damn it, Luke! I'll tell _mom_ on you!"

"Oh don't be such a baby." He splashed water at me and I splashed back.

"Don't do—" I got a mouthful of water and that was it. I swam under water to his feet and yanked as hard as I could and pulled him out from under his feet.

I hurried out of the water and looking behind me to make sure he was still in the water I bumped into what felt like a brick wall.

"Whoa. I am sorry." I said as I looked up to see a good-looking guy.

"Don't worry about it. I love it when a sexy lady bumps into me." His eyes began to wander over my body and I grinned at him. Perfect timing.

"If you'd like…we're about to play a game of volleyball."

I was about to speak but Lucas cut me off.

"Sounds like fun…isn't that right babe?" He had his hand on the small of my back and his mouth near my ear.

"Oh sorry didn't realize you were taken."

I went to speak but Lucas cut me off…again.

"So how about that game?" Lucas said.

"Yo Nathan! Beach volleyball you in? Hales?"

Damn him! I pushed away from Lucas and wrapped my arm around the guy's in front of me.

"So what's your name?" I asked him.

"Caleb. And you?" He asked never taking his eyes off of me.

"Brooke. Don't worry about Lucas…just a little overprotective." I said and I could feel Lucas catching up with us and I heard Nathan and Haley following close by.

Caleb began to introduce us to everyone and I introduced the four of us to his group of friends. I mentioned Lucas last and I have never seen him act the way he was now. His jaw was constantly clinched and his eyes were cold. I smiled to myself when he wasn't looking.

With me, Nathan, Haley, and Lucas, it made nine of us total which meant someone had to sit out. Haley said she would sit out as she would rather watch her man play. So I insisted that I be on the opposing team as Nathan and Lucas as it would be more interesting. Lucas had pulled Nathan to the side and said something to him and Nathan looked right at me and smirked. What the hell did Lucas say to him?

"So you going to watch my back during the game?" I winked at Caleb and he winked back.

"Of course, darling."

Lucas was up to serve first and he went to serve the ball and drilled it straight to Caleb. Caleb was quick, fast and immediately hit the ball back over the net. Nathan came in for a spike and the other guy to my left went in for the hit and spiked it back over and we got the point. I jumped and squealed as I held my hand up to Michael, the guy who got us the first point of the game.

"Alright gorgeous, how about you take the first serve?" Caleb tossed me the ball and if looks could kill right now…Caleb would be dead as Lucas was trying to bore holes into his head.

"I am not that good at serving so what's my best approach at doing this?"

Lucas was eating it up. Caleb walked behind me and showed me using his hands and arms to demonstrate with mine the best way to serve the ball.

"Okay…so overhanded is the easiest way?" I asked him turning to look at him. He nodded.

"Just go for it." He said and walked back to his spot up front.

I tossed the ball up gently and hit it as hard as I could. It barely went over the net. Nathan set the ball up for a spoke. Lucas went for it and spiked it hard in front of Caleb hitting him square in the face.

"LUCAS!" I screamed and ran over to Caleb.

Caleb was down on the ground holding his hand against his nose. It was bleeding a little bit and Caleb's friends began to walk towards Nathan and Lucas.

"Wait! Stop!" I shouted. It was like a power I possessed because all the men stopped and turned to look at me.

"Get your friend taken care of. I'll deal with _him_!" I said fiercely.

They finally let up and went to assist Caleb. I stormed over to Lucas and Nathan went to join Haley.

"What the hell was that about?" I pushed him back forcefully and it barely did anything to him.

"It was an accident."

"Bull shit!" I stammered.

"Brooke that jerk had his hands all over you and you just let him do it!"

I honestly didn't think he would actually admit to saying he did it on purpose but my plan was obviously working but I didn't want anyone getting hurt because of it.

"Maybe I liked having his hands all over me. Now I want you to go and apologize…now!" I demanded.

Lucas hesitated but I knew him better than he thought. He began to walk over to the group of guys and I followed close behind. Caleb just glared at him and Lucas shook his head.

"I am sorry. I really didn't think it would hit you in the face." Lucas was actually being very gentlemanly about it.

"It's a game. Sometimes shit happens." Caleb said and I was impressed.

You don't meet many guys like him these days. Lucas held out his hand and Caleb shook it. Lucas helped Caleb to his feet.

"Alright come on. The game isn't over." Caleb patted Lucas on the back and winked at me.

I was getting more impressed by this stranger.

"Are you sure?" I asked him.

"Definitely darling."

Nathan pulled Lucas back on their side of the net. We played a little longer and Lucas and Nathan's team ended up winning by two points. Lucas still didn't enjoy the fact that Caleb and I were flirting and I also didn't plan on actually taking a likening to this guy either.

"So I see that it worked."

I turned around to face Caleb.

"Excuse me?"

"I mean did I not help you succeed in pissing off your boyfriend." He whispered. I looked over at Lucas who still had his eyes on me.

"I'm sorry." I said and turned to face him.

"It's okay, just as long as I can get your number."

I really didn't know what to do. I mean yes, this guy totally surprised me and ended up being totally different than most guys I meet but was I ready to date again?

"Um how about you give me your number?" I asked him knowing very well what that line meant.

"So you won't call me?" He asked laughing a little bit.

"It's not that…it's just I just got out of a rough relationship and Lucas over there is an old ex I just wanted to make jealous. Seriously, give me your number and we'll see." It was as honest as I could get with him.

He nodded, reached in his bag and pulled out a pen. He held my hand out and wrote his number down. He blew softly over the ink.

"Just in case, I guess. Nice meeting you Brooke." He walked away and I went to meet up with Haley.

"Wow, Davis, you work fast." Haley said.

"It's not like that."

"Oh so you weren't doing everything you've been doing today to get a rise out of Lucas? Brooke you overdid it a little bit."

I knew she was right but after awhile it just wasn't me. Caleb obviously knew what I was doing and only made it worse, but if Haley knew what I was doing then Lucas knew he was right all along.

"He gave me his number."

"Yeah, I can tell. Are you going to call him?" She asked me.

"I don't know. I briefly told him about Chase and Lucas. He was still willing to give me his number." I held my hand out to not smudge the number or anything like he said…just in case.

"Yeah and what about Lucas?" Haley asked as we got closer to the boys.

"I'm just trying to one up him on his game he's playing." I said bitterly.

"Brooke I love you both so much and I know that what happened around graduation sucked, but don't hurt him. And trust me I am going to do whatever it takes to keep him from hurting you too."

I never heard Haley defend him like this and I was beginning to think that not only did Nathan know Lucas's secret but Haley did too. She kept walking and jumped into Nathan's arms. I stood back and watched Lucas. He sat back in his place on his towel and went back to reading his book. I finally looked over at the title of the book he was reading: Jack London's _The Call of the Wild._

"_What are you reading?" I asked him as I sat next to him on my couch. _

_He has been staying here for the past few days._

"_Jack London's The Call of the Wild." _

"_What's it about?" I looked over his shoulder to capture a few lines from the book._

_He shrugged and his face hardened._

"_It's about a dog."_

"_A dog? That doesn't even sound like something you would read." I laughed as it sounded absurd that someone like him who loves Steinbeck, Faulkner and Shakespeare to read a book about a dog._

_He scoffed and I knew I had upset him._

"_Seriously. What is it about this dog?"_

"_His name is Buck. He was taken out of his comfort zone and thrown into a brutal life as a sled dog. He struggles to fit in and receives harsh treatment from humans as well as other dogs. He's an outcast and he does whatever it takes to survive." He turned the page and I began to understand why he liked this book._

_Lucas always felt like he was an outsider even though he had an amazing group of friends, a mother who loved him more than anything and a brother who didn't inherit his hate and scorn from their father. Lucas and Nathan would spend time together without Dan's knowledge and how Dan never found out was a shock to us all…or maybe he did know…_

"_It sounds like a really great book." _

_A few days ago Dan and Deb Scott died in a car accident leaving Nathan an orphan. Surprisingly enough when Dan's last will was read, Lucas's mother, Karen was granted guardianship of Nathan. None of this made any sense to any of us especially Karen. Karen and Dan never really talked but she was close to Deb. Maybe that's where that came from? Dan didn't want to be a part of Lucas's life, but yet in the will he placed Karen as Nathan's guardian and left over half of his money to Nathan and Lucas and even left a huge sum to Karen as well. Here we were at sixteen and Lucas had never secluded himself like he has been in my house for the past few days. Dan had left Lucas a letter in the will and Lucas still hasn't read it. I was almost tempted to snatch it from his backpack and read it myself. I promised Karen that Lucas was doing fine as he asked to be left alone. Nathan had stopped by a few times, but Lucas didn't want to see him. He felt that Nathan knew about this all along, but Nathan was just as surprised as Lucas had been._

"_Maybe when you've finished reading it, I could read it?" I asked him as I wrapped my arms around my legs._

"_Yeah, I think you would like it." He said never taking his eyes off the book._

"_Do you mind if I sit here for awhile?" _

_Even with Lucas in the house with me, it still felt so empty and cold. He nodded and for the first time since he had been staying here, he wrapped his arm around my shoulders and brought me into his side. I buried my head into his chest._

"_Thanks." He whispered._

"_For what?" I asked in his chest._

"_For letting me stay here and for not pressuring me to go back home or to read that damn letter." _

_I nodded. He began to read the novel aloud and as he did I found myself being comforted by his voice and the words escaping from his mouth that I drifted off into one of the most comfortable slumbers._

God did I miss moments like that with Lucas. He never told me what was in that letter from Dan and I tried many times to get him to tell me but he never did. Something was wrong. I could feel it. He wouldn't be reading that book if something wasn't bothering him. I walked back over and took my spot next to Lucas. I saw him tense up and I ran my hands over the old worn cover of the book.

"You know I have a copy of that book in my room." I said quietly.

"Oh you're talking to me now." He snapped at me.

I deserved that…I guess.

"Lucas, please tell me what you expected from your stay here with me?" I turned to face him.

"You know what…I think Haley and I are going to take a walk." Nathan and Haley stood up and began to walk down the beach.

I let out a frustrated sigh and turned back to Lucas.

"Honestly Luke…did you think things would go back to the way they were before we slept together?" I almost wanted to cry because he has been frustrating me since he came here yesterday.

"In some ways yes. Damn it, Brooke, I am sorry for what happened and believe me if I could take it back I would. I never wanted to destroy our friendship, but I did. I'd like to think we are different people now or whatever but can we at least work on rebuilding or something?" He closed the book and turned to face me.

I wasn't going to cave but I found myself wanting to give in.

"Maybe." I said biting my lower lip and his eyes immediately went to my mouth.

"I'll take a maybe." He said as he smiled and went back to reading his book.

"Lucas what did Dan's letter say?" I didn't look at him and hoped that he would tell me. Tell me everything but predictable Lucas he threw up his walls.

"Nothing."

I sighed angrily and turned on my stomach and unhooked the back of my bathing suit to tan my backside. I turned my head away from him as I could see Nathan and Haley in the distance. I wanted what they had. I wanted that love, that passion, that fire that never altered between them. They were the real vision of true love and I desperately wanted that with Lucas, but I don't ever see that happening for me…us.

It was getting late and I had to admit I got a lot of sun today which made me happy. I had put Caleb's number in my phone and when we got back to the house and I was so exhausted. Who knew that lying around pretty much all day in the sun would be tiring? It was nearly time for the sun to set and Nathan and Haley already stated that they were going to bed early. I was still downstairs putting away everything we didn't use at the beach. I drained the water from the cooler and proceeded upstairs. I stopped as I heard Lucas in his bedroom.

I stood outside his door and listened.

"_I don't care what you think! You knew what I wanted!...Oh so you thought you would save me the heartache and the burden? Please…no one was supposed to know anything about __**that**__ and then you drop news like that on me and then take it away? Lana, for the last time, I don't ever want to speak to you again!" _ He paused for a moment.

"_No I never loved you but that never gave you the right to do what you did! Well I guess I will just do that. Don't ever call me again!" _

He slung his phone against the wall and it made me jump. I heard him walking closer to the door and I did my best to quietly hurry into my bedroom. Once I did, I let out a sigh of relief only to have him come through my bathroom door.

I screamed and he stood there with his arms crossed.

"What did you hear?" He asked me.

"Nothing." I really didn't. All I heard was him yelling at a girl he didn't love.

"You're lying." He walked closer to me.

"Lucas all I heard you say was that you didn't love whoever you were talking to on the phone. I promise."

He had backed me into a corner and if I needed too I would react instinctively. I saw the look on his face, the same look he got when he found out his uncle Keith died.

"Lucas." I said softly scared for him.

"Goodnight Brooke." He said coldly.

He walked away from me and I heard him slam his bathroom door shut. I sunk down to the ground and tears started to form in my eyes.

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><p><strong>WHEW! Okay a lot just happened...what are your thoughts? Up next we meet Clay...Haley talks to Lucas about Lana. <strong>

**Stay tuned!**


	4. Replacement

**A/N: You guys are aaawwweeesssooommmmeee! (In NPH's Barney voice)**

**Replies to reviews:**

**So a lot of you like Caleb and Brooke possibly getting with him for a little bit...maybe...you'll just have to wait and see ;) ALSO a lot of you wanted Clay...well congratulations guys...he's introduced in this story briefly but you get to know exactly who he is... ;)  
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**_dianehermans:_ I love jealous Lucas too and the dreams are always fun to write! I'm glad you love this story**

**_pam:_ I actually wished I had snow...spring has started here in Georgia and I loathe it bugs are everywhere and that cursed pollen! Jealous Lucas always fun...Definitely going to spill a little at a time what the deal is with Lana.**

**_justgoldworthy:_ Brooke is partially based on how I handled my feelings and actions towards my ex...so I am kind of projecting myself on her so when things start going down south...yeah that was stupid ole me, but I promise she stands strong. She doesn't give into him like that not just yet anyway lol**

**_FaithHopeLove:_YAY you love this story and I have to admit I am a little surprised I am updating quickly...but don't get used to it though lol**

**_OTHCharmfan:_Jealous Lucas is always fun and he will come back a lot promise! The beginning was fun to write and I am sure you are going to love this chapter as well! Trust me Lucas feels bad for making Brooke cry...and I love writing Haley as momma to Brooke and Lucas and I love having them respond to her like her children...I love Haley!**

**_XHush-HushX:_Hopefully you might pick up a little on what Lucas's secret might be...and yes Brooke's teasing is fun and I will be sure to write more...Caleb will probably be back...maybe unexpectedly...**

**_Jenny:_ possibly ;)**

**Thanks again everyone! I loved writing this chapter...by the way. I love writing flashbacks of Brooke and Lucas back in high school! :)  
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><p><strong>Chapter 4: Replacement<br>**

**I know that it's time for a change**  
><strong>Mmm but when that change comes<strong>  
><strong>Will you still feel the same?<strong>

**I don't want to give up**  
><strong>But baby it's time I had two feet on the ground<strong>  
><strong>Can you release me<strong>  
><strong>Can you release me<strong>

**"Release** **Me"-Wilson Phillips**

I couldn't get any sleep not after today's events. First thing, this morning, I knew it was wrong to _join_ in on Brooke's fantasy but damn did I miss that girl. I missed her small, petite hands that would draw blood down my back. I missed her mouth that worked wonders on my body especially my throbbing member she always knew to give special treatment. I was completely throttled by her ways during sex. She was a virgin when she slept with me but that mouth…that mouth did not belong to a virgin. After spending time with her sexually it made me realize that she did other things with guys besides sex. I wanted to track down every guy she had given hand jobs, blow jobs to and break their necks. I should have been the one that experienced all her firsts in that way, but I knew I couldn't be _that_ selfish.

It was around eleven at night and the rest of the household was asleep. The only thing I really wanted to do was burst through Brooke's room and tell her everything. My feelings. Everything that has happened in New York…and to me. I rested my hand against her door and turned around and went down the stairs quietly. I knew I had made her cry because she knew something was wrong with me. She saw right through me. When she said my name in that soft, broken voice, I couldn't do it. I couldn't stay and comfort her; I wasn't that type of person. I used to be for her, but when things changed between us I knew I couldn't be that guy for her, that friend she always leaned on. At some point, I was going to try and make things right by her, try to find a way to prove myself to her. I _needed _and _wanted_ to be that guy for her.

I reached into the fridge and grabbed a beer. Memories flooded my mind as everything about Brooke rushed through my head. I remember the moment that I fell in love with Brooke and it took me four years afterwards to make me realize that I was indeed in love with the feisty brunette upstairs.

"_What cha doin?" _

_I looked over the top of my computer to see her in my grey Keith Scott Body Shop hoodie and a huge grin on her face._

"_I am doing our English assignment for Peterson's class, something that you should be doing as well."_

"_Oh come on since when are you the responsible one, isn't that my job?" She pointed to herself._

_Something was different about her. She was bouncing in place and I wanted to reach out to her and take whatever she was on. _

"_True, but you do remember that I actually **enjoy** English." I continued to type and she immediately closed my laptop._

"_Brooke…" I said sternly._

"_Come on! Come with me." She said as she grabbed my hand leaving me no choice but to follow._

_I had never seen her like this before. She grabbed my keys and got in the driver's seat._

"_Um you are not driving my car." I pointed out._

"_Come on pretty boy! I am giving you a huge surprise; now get your ass in the car." She pointed towards the passenger seat. _

_I hesitated. No one __**ever **__drove Keith's car except for me but this was Brooke. I caved and walked over to the passenger side and got in. She immediately sped off._

"_Damn it Brooke, slow down!" I yelled at her._

"_Oh zip it! I promise nothing is going to happen to us or Keith's car. I promise." _

_I smirked at her and tried to figure out where we were going but I had no idea. We were driving out of town and I was getting more excited. This was usually a move I would make. I would sometimes kidnap her and take her out of town to a bar or a club and I felt like maybe that was something she was doing for me._

"_Are you taking me to a club, Brookie?" _

_She shook her head._

"_Better."_

_I kinked my eyebrow._

"_An orgy?" I crossed my fingers._

_She smacked me on the back of the head._

"_Pervert and ew, gross. No, just shut up and let me drive." _

_I was getting more intrigued and excited by the moment. Thirty minutes outside of town we pulled up to a huge amphitheater. I looked over at her and I felt like her eyes were going to pop out of her head. She stripped the grey hoodie off and was wearing this black strapless dress that she had bunched up. She pulled it down over her jeans as she removed them throwing them in the backseat. My mouth dropped as I've never seen her do anything...so sexy._

"_COME ON!" She was so excited. _

_I got out of the car and she held her hand out for me. I took it and I was smiling like a kid in a candy store because that's how I felt. At seventeen years old I felt like a five year old. We reached a door that had these huge bouncers and Brooke pulled out what looked like two tickets and one of the guys nodded. I was about to speak but once we were inside the amphitheater, my mouth dropped. _

_There was a huge banner on the backdrop of the stage and in huge black and red letters it spelled Incubus. I turned towards Brooke and she handed me one of the tickets in her hands. I looked down at it and it was definitely a concert ticket for row one for Incubus, September 3, 2005. _

"_I spent all day yesterday on two different phones calling into the radio station to get these tickets and I won them! I won! HAPPY BIRTHDAY LUCAS SCOTT!" She was bouncing and I threw my arms around, picked her up and held her in my arms. _

_No one has ever done anything like this for me before. Haley has done ridiculous things for me, but to spend all day avoiding a paper that was due in less than twenty-four hours to win tickets for a concert to my favorite band. Priceless._

"_Brooke Davis, what would I do without you! Thank you so much!"_

"_No problem!" _

We spent the entire night rocking out, laughing, meeting some amazing people, and I got to give Brandon Boyd so many high fives and Brooke even got a shout out from the band, calling her the hottest chic in the front row, which I believe she was the hottest chic in the stadium no matter if Angelina Jolie was in the crowd somewhere. It was a night I would never forget and that was the moment that I fell in love with her, it just took me four years to see it.

Haley had left a Duke Campus catalog on the table for me and I started to look through some of the writing classes. I nearly jumped out of my skin when a hand rested on my shoulder.

"Fuck, Hales, you could have given me a heart attack."

I reached for my chest. She placed her hand over my heart and gave me a sad face.

"Lucas, I am so sorry, I really didn't mean to scare you."

I grabbed her hand and brought it to my lips and kissed it.

"It's okay. What are you doing up? Did I wake you?" I sat my beer down.

Haley looked at my beer and shook her head.

"No, you didn't wake me up. I just wanted a glass of water." She poured herself a glass and sat next to me on the couch.

"Lucas, what are you doing up so late? What's bothering you?"

I wasn't sure if I wanted to get into it with her, but she accidentally overheard me talking to Nathan on the phone and he ended up spilling everything to her, well almost everything and she just said that whenever I wanted to talk to her about it, I could.

"You know I just…I am angry and upset and I have nowhere to channel my anger. I am trying so hard to be the better person, the person I have hoped I could become being away in New York but I find myself gradually slipping back into that ass hole. Hell, I haven't even had a chance to show Brooke the man I've become." I finished my beer and sat the glass on the coffee table.

"Brooke, I think deep down, she knows you're a different person, but you know you don't really help much with all the messing around you do with her, but I've talked about you over the years and how you've changed." She drank some more of her water and I looked over at her curiously.

"Like what?" I really wanted to know what Brooke knew about me.

"I told her about the volunteer programs you were a part of in New York. I also mentioned to her that you aren't as selfish as you used to be and I truly believe that you aren't. You are just stubborn like she is and you are never truthful with your feelings. Lucas you need to work on that or Brooke will never understand or know what's really in here." She placed her hand over my heart again and if she only knew what was really going on in there.

"Lana has been calling non-stop since I've gotten here and this is only my second night gone from New York." I scoffed and ran my hand over my face.

"What does she want?"

"My forgiveness. I mean how can I possibly forgive her for something like that? She was there that day in the hospital with me. I didn't want her to be but it just happened. Then two weeks ago she just…" I couldn't bring myself to say it out loud then it would only make it real.

"Lucas, I'm sorry. No one deserves to be left out of something that important. What happened at the hospital? Nathan didn't mention anything to me about that part of the situation?"

I looked over at my long time friend and I couldn't bear to tell her. I pulled Haley into a hug and held her tight.

"You're my family Hales and I love you."

Haley, my mom, and Keith were the only three people in the entire world I've ever muttered those words too. I have never once said it to Nathan, my brother, but we were guys, we knew it was understood, that it was there between us, and Brooke. There were so many times I wanted to say it to her even when we were just friends, but with her it always felt like it would mean something different... something more.

"Lucas you're scaring me. Should I be worried about you?" She placed her hand on my cheek and I closed my eyes.

"No. I will be fine. Haley go back to sleep and please don't worry about me." I kissed her forehead.

"Still I do worry, Lucas, please go back upstairs and get some sleep yourself. Forget about her, she is not worth your anger or pain at all." She squeezed my arm and walked back to her bedroom.

I didn't want to go back upstairs because if I did I was going to walk into Brooke's bedroom and crawl into bed with her and cuddle up to her. That was all I wanted. She made me feel safe when no one else could…but I ruined that for us…for her.

I got comfortable on the couch and tried to doze off. I fell into a sleep that brought me back to a memory…

"_I am Professor Moriarty, yes exactly like Sherlock Holmes arch-nemesis, but I promise I am not bad." _

_A roar of giggles fled the room and I smiled. I think I will enjoy this class._

_A door was heard slamming shut and then a loud curse._

"_Shit!" The voice echoed through the room and I looked up to see the most beautiful raven-haired girl. _

"_I'm…I'm sorry." She made her way down to my row and lucky for me, she sat beside me._

"_Nice entrance." I whispered to her._

"_Thanks…is this Advanced Fiction Workshop?" She asked me._

"_Yes it is." I looked over her body quickly and she was very petite. I found myself comparing every woman I meet to Brooke. _

_Brooke was a different kind of beautiful. Everything about Brooke made her the most beautiful woman in the world to me. So far this raven-haired woman just had a natural physical beauty._

"_I'm Lana." She held out her hand._

"_Lucas." I placed my hand in hers._

_She smiled and we carried on a small conversation not really paying any attention to Professor Moriarty for the rest of the class. We walked out together and she stopped me. I had gotten to the point where I didn't make it a habit to sleep with women, but just wait to see what happens. _

"_Would you want to grab a coffee or something? I just transferred here from Kansas and this is a whole new world for me." _

"_There's no place like home." I mocked and smiled at her and nodded for her to follow me. She smiled in relief._

_We had a lot in common. We were both from small towns with a history of drama. She was the complete opposite of me. She was shy, innocent, and proper. I was outgoing, innocence wasn't even in my vocabulary, and I hardly ever used my manners. There was just something about her though. I couldn't really say, but I didn't have many girls who were just friends and that was the proposition she laid out on the table and I gladly accepted it. _

_I could never really be friends with a girl except with Haley, but with this one I could see it happening. We spent the rest of the day talking about the people in our lives and she mentioned this guy named Clark from her past and I openly rambled about Brooke. Every single time I talked about her, I found myself realizing just how much I was in love with her and how I could never see it before I wasn't sure. _

I woke up to the sound of squealing. When I opened my eyes I saw Brooke Davis fly past me out the front door. I looked over to the clock and it read ten thirty. Did I really sleep that late? There was a sticky note on my empty beer bottle from Haley.

_I told Brooke and Nathan not to wake you. Sleep in, Luke. I'll see you after my class. Love you, Haley_

I sat up and immediately lay back down. I didn't realize how much I drank yesterday as the hangover started to sink in.

"Good you're awake."

I looked over and saw Nathan sitting at the kitchen island eating a bowl of cereal.

"What was that all about?" I pointed towards the door Brooke just flew through.

"Oh…Clay's in town."

My ears perked up immediately at the name of a guy and to see Brooke's reaction to him was unsettling.

"You should see the look on your face." Nathan giggled and I rolled my eyes.

"Should this be someone I should be worried about?" I asked him.

"Not if you're in love with Rachel." He went back to stuffing his mouth full of cereal.

"Rachel?" I questioned.

"He's sort of sleeping with her, but Brooke met him first and they've been like best buddies ever since. He's a year older than us and graduated early as well. He plays basketball for The Bobcats. So damn jealous."

I closed my eyes and rested my hand over my face. Great! I thought. I heard the door open and two voices laughing and carrying on a conversation.

"I am so glad you're in town. Rachel must be thrilled."

I stayed hidden behind the couch as I am sure Brooke didn't realize I was laying here.

"Sure she is. You know how Rachel is, hot and cold. Fuck that. If one of us needs a quick lay, we're it for each other."

I rolled eyes. So far he seems like a replacement of me.

"I will never understand you two. I mean you don't sleep with other people and it's obvious you are in love with her and Rachel, she's just too damn stubborn to admit having any feelings like that."

I really wish I could see how she was around him whether a lot of touching was involved or if she gave that one and only gorgeous dimpled smile that usually was meant for only me.

"Cookie. Rachel in love? Fuck, you think I'm in love…you have lost your mind, B."

"Whatever. One of these days Silly Boy, one of these days."

Silly Boy? Really? She sure did love giving out those nicknames that all sound way too familiar to mine. I was about to make my presence known until my name was mentioned.

"So where's the infamous Lucas Scott, I've heard so much about?"

"He's—" Nathan started but Brooke cut him off.

"Really? I haven't seen you in three months and one of the first things you ask me is where Lucas Scott is?" She sounded hurt but it was more in a joking manner.

"B. Davis. Lucas Scott is someone that you could not stop talking about and when Rachel told me he was in town, I had to stop by and see this douche for myself."

That was it.

"Well congratulations, here I am." I didn't care that I had a raging headache but to see the looks on Brooke's and Clay's faces were priceless in that moment.

Nathan started laughing and Brooke shot him a look.

"I was going to mention he was there but you so rudely interrupted me." Nathan patted Brooke on the shoulder.

"So this is Lucas. Clay, nice to meet you." He held his hand out and I knew this had to be a joke.

"Douche, that's a good one. Geez, Brooke, what have you been telling this dick here about me?"

"Hey!" Brooke snorted.

Clay just grinned at me and did I ever want to smack a grin off someone's face it would have been right here and now. There were some characteristics that resembled me in him, but he didn't stand a chance against me in a fight. Hot shot basketball star or not. I'd beat his little pansy ass into the ground.

"It's alright Brooke, he almost seems a little jealous. I know all about you Scott, so it's okay to have the little green monster on your back." He patted me on the shoulder. I went after him but Nathan forcefully held me back.

"Okay, you're hungover Luke. Clay, it's always nice to see ya, but right now, not the best time." Nathan started pulling me away and the look on Brooke's face. It seemed like she wanted to apologize but I just gave her my brooding look, the look to let her know that she had hurt my feelings. I never once thought of replacing her as that person in my life, but it seemed she had no problem doing that to me.

I followed Nathan into his bedroom and he closed the door. I plopped down on his bed and he leaned against the door.

"Dude, what the hell? Were you really about to start a fight with Clay? Someone who has become a great friend of Brooke's?"

I shook my head.

"No." I said quietly.

"Well I'd hope not…if I were you I would save that energy for Chase." He walked over to his dresser and pulled out a t-shirt.

"Chase? Who is Chase?" I sat up and waited for him to reply.

"Chase is the douche bag that broke Brooke's heart and told her that he didn't want anything to do with her." He slammed the drawer shut roughly and slid his shirt on over his head.

It was like a knife in my heart. I felt my whole body tighten at the thought of someone hurting her. It also made me angry because it only reminded me of what I did to her as well.

"Where is he?" I asked.

"He moved to Florida six months ago for an internship, but I heard he was moving back soon."

I clinched my fists together. I wanted to channel my anger on him. I wanted to beat the shit out of him until he couldn't see anymore.

"When he comes back you let me know." I got up from his bed and walked out of the room.

Once I was out of his bedroom, I saw Clay and Brooke still in the kitchen. I made brief eye contact with her and started up the stairs.

"Lucas!" Nathan shouted out.

I went into my bedroom and slammed the door. I began to pace and I grew angrier by the moment. Brooke never really had a relationship in high school, but every once in awhile she would go on dates, kiss a few toads, but I never experienced anyone hurting her except for me. Knowing that there was some prick out there that had broken her, I wanted to kill them.

I went to take a shower. I smelled like the beach and alcohol. I got into the shower and let the water stream over my body. I leaned my hands against the tile and closed my eyes. All I saw was Brooke. The images of her from high school, her face during sex, her hands running down my back, her moaning my name when she had an orgasm flooded my head. I immediately reached one of my hands down to my dick and began to rub my hand up and down my shaft. I grunted as I wished it was Brooke's hand…her mouth around my dick, but I lost that privilege years ago. I remembered the first night we had sex and it only made my hand increase in pace.

"_I want to be with you Lucas." She moaned in my ear as I kept my mouth on her pussy. _

_Her hands yanked my hair forward and I released my mouth from her and made my way up to her face. Her shaky hands went down to my pants and reached for my dick. I stopped her._

"_Brooke, you don't have to do this." I brought her hands back up._

"_I want this Lucas. I've always wanted you to be my first." She said as she bit her lower lip. _

_That was the fuel I needed and I crashed my lips onto hers. Her hands went back down to my pants and I stopped her again. _

"_Don't. I want this to be right for you, Brooke. I do. Are you sure this is what you want?" I loved that she wanted me to do this, to be her first, but there was something in the back of my mind that was screaming no, don't do this._

"_Please Lucas, I want it to be you." _

_I looked into her eyes once more and there was no regret, she wanted this, and I...wanted this too._

_I kissed down her neck between her breasts giving both of them attention, and made my way down her stomach. Her hands found their way back to my hair. I loved it when she would pull on my hair. I found her wet center again and kissed her passionately and she let out a loud moan as my name rolled off her tongue. I grinned against her pussy and kissed my way back up her body. _

"_Do you have a condom?" She asked me quietly. _

_I nodded and reached down by the bed to reach in my wallet. I pulled out a single condom and began to unwrap it. She watched me as I placed it around my hard member and she smiled as her whole body shuttered. I placed myself back on top of her and held my dick in my hand. _

"_Pretty girl, you tell me at any point if I'm hurting you." I said to her as I positioned myself over her center._

_She nodded and brought her hands to my shoulders. _

"_I'm ready, Lucas." _

_I entered her slowly never taking my eyes off her face. She inhaled sharply and shut her eyes tightly still biting that lower lip of hers. I pushed further inside of her and her eyes opened._

"_Brooke?" I questioned as I felt her whole body tense._

"_Keep going Luke." _

_I did as she requested. I pushed myself all the way in her and I heard her let out a soft cry. I froze._

"_Brooke, I'm pulling out." I couldn't stand to see her face crumble like she was in pain._

_Her nails dug into my shoulders._

"_Don't you dare!" She hissed and she surprised me. She began to move her hips and I moved with her._

_I rested on top of her and began to thrust in her slowly. I brought my hands to her face._

"_Open your eyes pretty girl." _

_Her eyes snapped open and we locked eyes. I began to move a little faster in her and her mouth opened wider and her face contorted into pleasure. Her head arched back giving me access to her flesh. I brought my lips to her skin and kissed and sucked lightly._

"_Faster Luke." She begged. I increased my pace plunging into her deeper and quicker. I could feel a liquid between her legs. She was bleeding. Brooke froze and realized what was happening. _

"_Oh my God, Lucas, I'm, I'm sorry."_

"_Hey, hey…ssshhh, pretty girl, it's okay, it happens, it just means you're not a virgin anymore." I reassured her by kissing her softly. _

"_Do you want to stop and clean it up?" I really didn't want to pull out of her yet, but I didn't want to make her uncomfortable at all._

_She shook her head. _

"_I can just wipe it up with the sheet." _

_I nodded and she pulled one of the sheets in between us and began wiping it away. I helped her. She began to get over her embarrassment and looked back up at me._

"_You okay?" I asked her surprised I was still hard inside of her._

"_Yeah, please keep going." _

_I started to find our rhythm again and I could feel myself getting close but I would do whatever it took to let this last longer for her. I wanted to make her come until she couldn't stand it. I started pumping harder and faster and I brought her legs up and placed them on my shoulders giving me better access to push into her further. I thrust every inch of me inside of her and she arched forward and I hit a spot because the noise she let out was unbelievably sexy. _

"_Lucas, I'm…"She bit her lower lip again and I went harder and faster and her eyes shot open once again and I leaned back pulling her with me. Her legs fell from my shoulders around to my waist. She wrapped her legs around me and I pulled her as close as I could against me. Her forehead rested against mine. I wrapped one arm around her back holding her upright and my other hand rested on the back of her head._

_"It's happening Lucas, I'm…I—" She screamed as she came and I was right behind her._

_I silenced her screams with a kiss. Her moan protruded into my mouth and I let my tongue mate with hers. I moaned as well as both of our bodies started to shake. Her forehead rested against mine once again and I ran my hand through her hair pulling back the strands that stuck to her face. I was breathing just as hard as she was and her eyes were still closed._

"_Open…your…eyes… pretty girl." I breathed out trying my best to find my composure._

_Her eyes opened slowly and she looked back at me._

"_Lucas, that was amazing." _

I groaned as I pumped my hand harder and faster and my release flooded through my body. That night I would never forget. She was absolutely beautiful in every way possible.

I leaned against the shower wall as I let my juices squirt out. I finished my shower and turned off the water. When I opened the shower door, I was taken a back by what I saw or more so who I saw.

Brooke sat on the counter with my towel in her hand. How long had she been in here?

"Brooke, my towel." I reached out for it and for a moment she seemed flustered. Her face was a little pale and I was beginning to wonder if she…I smirked at her.

"Did you…"

She didn't say anything and I didn't need to finish my sentence.

"You're very vocal Lucas, you know that right." She said and I grinned.

"If I remember correctly so are you." I wasn't ashamed to be naked and walk around in the nude so I just stepped out of the shower and walked into my room.

She didn't follow me but I knew she was hoping I would fight her for it. I found the towel I used yesterday on my dresser and started to dry myself off with it. I heard her behind me and I smiled.

"Can I help you with something?" I asked as I kept my back to her.

"I'm sorry about what happened earlier. Clay is just overprotective when it comes to me."

It stung a little to hear her talk about someone else in that way. Someone that wasn't me.

"So it was just okay for you to tell him everything about _me_?" I asked as I dropped my towel. I heard her inhale sharply and it brought me back to our first time together. I had to think of dead babies to keep my dick from getting hard again.

I reached for a pair of boxers, slipped them on and turned to face her.

"Over the years yeah I talked to him about you, but he didn't have to call you a douche and I'm sorry." She said as she fiddled with her thumbs.

"It is fine, Brooke. I was a douche back then. I'd like to think I have changed or at least working on it." I turned back around and reached for a plain tee and pulled on a pair of jeans.

"Well Rachel and Clay want to take us out to dinner tonight and we _all_ want you to come with us."

"And be a fifth wheel? No thanks." I said as I went over to my laptop and cut it on.

"Um hello…I'll be there and for your information I am more of the fifth wheel than you. I am sure you might find a hot waitress to flirt with then I will be like the seventh wheel." She chuckled.

"Be my date." I said nonchalantly.

I looked up at her and her mouth was parted slightly as she didn't know what to say.

"It's not going to be a date Luke. It's friends hanging out, catching up, and eating dinner."

"Well if Nathan is going to be there with Haley…and if I heard correctly this morning, Clay and Rachel are pretty much smitten with each other…why can't we just go _together_?" I asked her and sat down at the small desk and looked up at her.

"No, Lucas, just friends."

"Come on…humor me." I said challenging her.

She stood there for a moment thinking about it as her thumbs hooked on her pockets, she was doing that pigeon-toed stance, and biting her lower lip.

"Okay…just to humor you." She pointed out and went out the door.

I smiled…it's a start.

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><p><strong>Thoughts? I am actually enjoying writing more in Lucas's POV than Brooke's but next chapter I'm thinking I'll do it in both...<strong>

**Up next: the six of them go out to dinner and get a surprise that's really unexpected! Any idea what it might be? :D STAY TUNED!**


	5. Dinner

**MUST READ: So I posted a link of a photo of what I wanted Brooke and Lucas to look like at this dinner it's from season 5 episode 4 during Brooke's store opening. This was by far one of my favorite looks for both of them. I thought Sophia was absolutely beautiful in this scene and Chad was so handsome. So check it out because i didn't do a great job of describing her dress or her hair...of course just forget that Peyton is in the picture lol...sorry Hilarie B, you were gorgeous but Peyton blah! Of course get rid of the spaces between the letters and symbols! It's worth looking at how adorable they are! :)**

** h t t p : / / w w w . s o p h i a b u s h f a n . o r g / g a l l e r y / d i s p l a y i m a g e . p h p ? p i d = 4 4 9 2 9 & f u l l s i z e = 1  
><strong>

**You guys are killing it on the reviews! I love them sooooooooo much! You guys are awesome for reals! love love love love love them! Also, I did say this story was going to be a semi-short one so some things will pick up but at a slower pace...if that makes sense! lol this chapter is a step in the direction it needs to go!**

**Enjoy!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 5: Dinner<strong>

**Heart beats fast**

**Colors and promises**

**How to be brave**

**One step closer**

**Time stands still**

**"A Thousand Years" -Christina Perri  
><strong>

What have I gotten myself into? I have yet to figure out what I am wearing tonight. So I made up an excuse to go out and buy a new dress, Haley and Rachel came with me as I needed their opinion.

"I can't believe you agreed to do this. Brooke, this isn't even a date, we're all friends hanging out catching up with each other." Haley browsed through a rack of dresses and I rolled my eyes.

"That's what I said, but think about it. Clay and Rachel are going to be all over each

other—"

"I resent that." Rachel cut me off.

I laughed at her.

"And you and Nathan are together as well, I mean believe it or not, no one is going to believe that we are all just friends with you four groping and hanging all over each other, so yeah I guess I agreed to treat this like a date, but it's nothing serious. It's to humor him as he put it."

"Then why are we out shopping for a new dress when you have a closet full of amazing designer pieces." Rachel said as she leaned against a rack and Haley crossed her arms as they both waited for a response.

"Because I love to shop why not buy a new dress."

This time my two friends both rolled their eyes.

"Whatever slut, you're not over him and that's cool because I know he's not over you." Rachel started looking through some dresses.

I stopped and looked over at her. He's not over me? He would have to have feelings like that towards me to not be over me. I didn't say anything as I kept looking through the dresses. Why was I doing this? This was pointless. I should just go home and find something in my closet that I've already worn, but where was the fun in that? Then I found the dress that would be the one to wow him tonight. I didn't even try it on because I knew that it would be perfect. I went to the check out line and paid for the dress.

"You didn't even try it on." Haley said as we drove back to the house.

"I know." I said not looking at her.

"She knows what she's doing Hales." Rachel said from the backseat.

"So what is the deal between you two?" Haley asked Rachel. I was also dying to know the answer to that question.

Rachel was silent and I just knew.

"Oh my God. You're in love with him." I said tossing a glance over my shoulder at her.

"Keep your eyes on the road, slut!" She hissed at me.

"Well, well, well. I never thought I'd see the day the devil fell in love. It's almost touching." Haley brought her hand to her chest and I grinned at her.

"Shut it, James."

"Rachel why don't you just tell him how you feel? I mean I know Clay, I know he feels the same way." I said genuinely. I would be more than thrilled to see them together. I don't understand why they are torturing themselves like this.

"Fine. I'll tell Clay how I feel when you tell Lucas how you feel."

I glared at her through the rear view mirror and she just kinked her eyebrow.

"Ray, what happened between me and Lucas is different than you and Clay. It's not even fair to compare our situations."

"B, you're in love with him and he's in love with you. You both are just too stubborn and stupid to admit to anything. I'm actually glad you two are going on this date or whatever it is to you." Rachel leaned back into the seat and the rest of the car ride was silent.

Lucky for us, the guys were still gone and I was able to sneak in my new dress without the guys knowing that I bought one for tonight's dinner.

"Well skanks, I'm going to go get ready for our dinner in a couple of hours. Clay and I will meet you guys here." She walked out the door and Haley turned to face me.

"What?" I asked her.

"Oh Tigger." She disappeared into her room and I went upstairs.

I took a fresh shower and started figuring out what I wanted to do with my hair. There was a knock on Lucas's side of the bathroom. I smiled at the courtesy he showed by knocking.

"Come in." I hugged the towel around my body.

Lucas popped his head in and my breath hitched in my throat. He had gotten a hair cut. His hair was short on the sides and he had a small faux hawk in the front. He looked so gorgeous.

"Yes." I said to him.

"I wanted to use the bathroom." He said stepping inside and waiting.

"Oh yeah, sure. Sorry." I grabbed my hair brush and started to walk away.

"Hey, I'm excited about tonight. Even if it isn't a real date." He said and I smiled at him before leaving the bathroom.

What is wrong with me? Why didn't I say anything? Or would it have been worse to say something rather than keeping my mouth shut? I shook my head and tried to subdue the butterflies that were tumbling in my stomach.

I began to blow dry my hair and I wore one of Nathan's old button down shirts and put on a simple thong. I was trying to figure out the best way to wear my hair and I ended up pinning it back in loose curls. I reached for the black bag that held the dress. I unzipped it and pulled out the dress. The background color was a dark fuchsia with an intricate exotic design. I smiled to myself as I took off the shirt and slipped into the dress. A perfect fit. I zipped up the dress that showed off most of my back. I slipped on a pair of heels in matching color to the dress. I knew I bought these shoes for a reason. I grabbed some dangly gold earrings and a large black ring.

I heard Clay and Rachel downstairs and I knew that it was time for me to head down as well.

"Take a deep breath." I said to myself. As I reached for my clutch and started towards the door, there was a knock.

I opened the door to find Lucas in a classic grey button down that was tucked into some very nice, expensive charcoal slacks with a matching belt. He shaved and I have never seen him look so amazing.

"Hey." I said.

"I got you something." He pulled out from behind his back, one single lotus flower.

"Lucas, it's beautiful." I took it from him and brought it to my nose.

"Come on." He held his arm out for me to take and I found myself blushing.

As we reached the top of the stairs, he stopped us and his mouth lowered to my ear.

"You look absolutely stunning."

I looked up at him and smiled.

"Thank you. You look very handsome as well. Who knew you could clean up so well?"

We walked down the stairs together to find what I knew would happen, Clay and Rachel in their own little world with Nathan kissing down Haley's neck as she giggles. For a minute I found myself uncomfortable because Lucas and I were the only two people not running our hands all over each other.

I cleared my throat to make our presence known.

"Are we ready?" I asked.

"Let's go." Clay said as we all made our way outside.

There were two cabs waiting outside for us. Rachel, Clay, Lucas, and I took one and Nathan and Haley took the other. The car ride started in silence before Clay spoke.

"So my girl over here tells me that you two had a thing back in high school." Clay said running his arm up and down Rachel's bare leg.

Lucas's arm around my shoulders tightened.

"Rachel and I just had sex. That was it. It seems that is a lot like what you two have, right Red?"

Lucas and Clay were staring each other down.

"Yeah Lucas and I shared something pretty amazing. I mean the sex was fantastic." Rachel said only aggravating the situation and making me uncomfortable.

Rachel and Lucas exchanged a look and Clay spoke again.

"Yeah well Rach here is a sex pistol." Clay gritted his teeth.

"So break any girls' hearts up in New York?" Clay asked Lucas.

I immediately felt Lucas's hand grip my shoulder. He didn't mean to do it. I looked over at him and there was something in his eyes I've never seen. This sadness washed over him.

"Clay cut it out." I snapped.

"Awe, come on B, I just want to know all about him. I mean I want to know the guy who broke your heart, see if I can find any reason why he would have done that."

"How about you deal with your own problems? You don't think I see how you look at Rachel and what it does to her? You like her, get over your fucking ego and ask the damn girl to be yours, although frankly I think Rachel deserves better."

The cab stopped and Lucas got out of the car holding his hand out for me. I placed my hand in his and got out of the car. I looked over at Lucas.

"Are you okay?" I asked him.

He nodded and Clay and Rachel were arguing in the cab and Nathan and Haley were close behind us.

"What's going on with those two?" Nathan asked.

"Nothing, let's just go ahead and head inside." I said pulling Lucas with me.

I felt the need to keep him close to me. That need to protect him. The feeling that used to possess me in high school. Whatever happened in New York, Clay's words got to him and I had a feeling it had to do with a girl, but not the way Clay assumed it was.

"Party for Clay Evans." Haley said as Nathan came back with Clay and Rachel who seemed to be in a better mood.

We followed the server to our table as we all sat down. Clay ordered two bottles of wine and we ordered a few appetizers. Rachel and Clay began to roam their hands all over each other once again, but this time it was different.

"Lucas, I want to apologize. I don't know you and I would like to get to know you."

My mouth dropped and I looked over at Rachel who just winked at me. What the hell happened in that cab after we got out?

"That's right you don't know me." Lucas said.

I turned to look at him and his face changed. He was beginning to brood and I rested my hand on his leg and gave it a small squeeze.

"How about we play nice, please? I would like for all of us to get along." I tensed and this time Lucas's hand went to my leg and he gave it a reassuring squeeze.

"I hear that you play for the Bobcats, Clay. How is that going for you?" Lucas's tone changed and he focused mainly on Clay.

I looked over at Clay who changed his position in his seat to face Lucas more.

"It's good. We do a lot of traveling but if we're ever close to Durham I do my best to stay in town and see everyone. Nathan and Brooke told me that you used to play ball. Do you miss it?"

I went back and forth watching Lucas and Clay. Lucas's face fell at the mention of basketball.

"I miss it everyday thanks to the heart condition." He placed his hand over his heart and it was like out of habit whenever the mention of his heart condition came up.

"I'm sorry man, I don't know what I would do if I had to give up something I love."

The table fell silent for a moment and then Nathan spoke.

"Well Lucas has one of the best hearts I know." Nathan smiled at his older brother of three months.

"Yeah." Haley reached over and took Lucas's hand.

I was shocked. If anything Lucas doesn't have the best heart but it made me realize that I don't really know Lucas anymore. Nathan and Haley knew what Lucas was hiding and it was killing me slowly to not have him be able to open up to me.

"You guys are killing my buzz." Rachel downed her glass of wine.

"Do you guys remember junior year right after I showed up into town?" Rachel said as she cracked a laugh.

"Who doesn't?" Haley asked.

We all began to smile.

"Tell me about it." Clay said.

Clay knew the story about Rachel and how she came into all of our lives, but Clay also realized that he was trying to make the situation better. We began to laugh and share stories and Lucas wasn't as tense as he had been. He started talking about the food fight we had at my house and I nearly spit up my wine until my eyes fell upon a person I haven't seen in a long time.

"Brooke what's wrong?" Haley asked me as she followed my gaze.

Everyone at the table turned their heads.

"Oh my God." Rachel said.

"Who is that?" Lucas turned to face me and I began to form tears in my eyes. He started walking towards us not noticing us yet and I began to panic.

"I, I have to go." I got up and started to walk away but the moment I did I heard my name.

"Brooke?"

I froze. I turned around and did my best to keep my composure.

"Hey Chase." I said trying to remain calm.

There was a gorgeous blonde attached to his arm and she was glaring at me.

"How are you?" He asked me and it almost seemed like he didn't really care, it was just something he had to ask me because he caught me.

"Great." That was a lie. I've been eating tubs of ice cream every week since the day you crushed me.

"That's good. You look good. This is Samantha." He turned to the blonde next to him and she held her hand out for me to take.

As I was about to reach it, two arms wrapped around my waist and then a pair of soft, strong lips were on mine. He pulled me close and I found myself wrapping my arms around his neck. His tongue asked permission to enter my mouth and I allowed him to do so. It's been a long time since this has happened. I couldn't resist deepening the kiss further until Chase cleared his throat. He smiled against my lips and turned to face Chase.

"I'm sorry who are you?" He held out his hand towards Chase and I still faced him with my arms around his neck as his other hand pulled me closer to him.

"Chase Adams and you?" Chase shook his hand firmly.

"Lucas. Lucas Scott and how do you know _my_ Brooke?" He leaned over and kissed my cheek

"I am…" Chase began to stutter.

"Chase is my ex-boyfriend." I finally found my words.

"Oh pretty girl, I thought you told me his name was Chuck." He looked back at me and brushed a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

"No, babe, it's Chase." I laughed a little and I could feel Chase shooting daggers at me.

"How about you and your date join us? We have plenty of room." Lucas said and I squeezed his arm in protest.

"Luke, they don't have to join us, they obviously came here for a date." I said giving him a stern look.

"We'd love to!" Chase piped in and Samantha looked at him like he was crazy.

"Great!" Lucas said leading us back to our table.

We all walked back over to our table and we had just got done eating our appetizers.

"Hey guys, you remember Chase." I said.

It seemed that they were all smiles except Clay. Obviously this was all an act they planned before Lucas came over and made out with me in front of him.

Chase said hey to everyone. The dinner was pretty awkward but Lucas didn't keep his hands off of me. I knew what he was doing and I ate it up. I played along and Chase couldn't stand it. Besides Chase and his slut of a girl, we had a great time. I wasn't sure if Clay and Lucas were playing along or actually coming to some kind of understanding. I had my money on the fact they were both ganging up on Chase to make him feel like shit.

When dessert finally came, Lucas kicked it up a few notches. He ordered a cheesecake with some strawberries, whip cream, and chocolate on the side. This almost seemed very inappropriate but Rachel and Clay ordered the exact same and decided to play along as Nathan and Haley shared a piece of chocolate cake. I could catch out the corner of my eye that Samantha was throwing herself at Chase but he just watches me and Lucas.

Lucas dipped a strawberry into the chocolate sauce and the whip cream and brought it to my lips. As I took a bite out of it, Lucas leaned over to my ear.

"So what does this remind you of?" He whispered.

I closed my eyes for a moment to remember.

"_Who are you and what have you done with Brooke?" His arms held my hips in place and I bit his ear._

_I reached behind me and grabbed a strawberry from the fridge and brought it to my lips. He licked my lips for a taste._

"_Hmm…sweet." He said licking his lips._

"_How about we make it sweeter?" I kinked my eyebrow at him._

_I pulled out whip cream and chocolate sauce._

"_Okay seriously where is Brooke Davis?" He pulls back and holds his hands up._

"_How about we just pretend she's on vacation?" I said seductively._

We had mad, crazy sex and I almost let it slip that I loved him that night. That's a whole other story and night that almost made tears form behind my eyes. I looked over at Chase who was so red in the face with anger that it made me smirk. I reached for a strawberry dipped it in chocolate and cream and brought it to Lucas's lips. I copied his action from earlier and I brought my lips to his ear.

"Thank you." I said.

He pulled away and looked at me.

"You're welcome."

Clay paid for everyone including Chase and Samantha's dinner. Lucas started kissing me again as we all headed out of the restaurant.

"Okay well we are going to take a cab home." Nathan said with his arm around Haley.

"It was good seeing you guys again." Chase said strained.

"Yeah." Rachel said as she clung to Clay's arm.

"It was nice meeting you, Chuck." Lucas held his hand out to Chase.

"It's Chase." He hissed.

I wrapped my arms tighter around Lucas's waist and smiled at Chase.

"Have a good night." I said to them.

Chase and Samantha walked in the opposite direction from us. Clay hailed down a cab.

"Hey let's go for a walk." Lucas whispered in my ear. I looked up at him and nodded.

"Hey we'll see you back at the house." I said to Rachel and Clay.

Clay gave a stern look and Rachel winked at us. Lucas and I began to walk and it was getting a little chilly. Lucky for me Lucas brought a jacket and placed it around my shoulders.

We walked in silence for a little bit before either one of us spoke.

"I'm sorry." He said and turned to look at him.

"For what?" I asked.

"You know what for Brooke." The most sincere passion escaped with those words.

"Lucas—"

"What did he do? The last time I saw you with that look on your face is when you walked in on me and Peyton."

I looked over at him and his jaw was clenched and I could see his hands clutched into fists in his pockets.

"He made me fall for him and then he ripped the rug out from under me. He just left me and said he didn't want me anymore." I hugged the jacket tighter around me as we continued to walk.

"If I could take that back for you I would. You never deserve to be treated that way. I should have never treated you that way."

"Lucas stop it, damn it!" I said harshly.

"Brooke."

"Stop it okay? I knew what I was getting myself into when I went as far as I did with you. I just, I don't know I thought that maybe if you knew how much I loved you maybe that would change things."

I could feel his eyes on me.

"Damn Brooke, I give a rat's ass about you trust me! It's just—"

We stopped and I looked over at him.

"Lucas, thank you for what you did tonight with Chase. Let's go home." I couldn't hear anymore.

He gave a rat's ass about me. I wanted to start crying. He got us a cab and we rode home in silence. Once we got back to the house I gave Lucas a small smile before walking inside. Haley and Nathan were sitting at the kitchen counter eating some ice cream.

"You two are still eating?" I asked.

"Well we just got done having sex so yeah craving after sex food."

I rolled my eyes and went to get a spoon. Lucas walked in, smiled at everyone and went upstairs.

"Everything okay?" Haley asked.

"Yeah." I said and we stayed up a little while longer talking and I didn't see Lucas again for the night.

Nathan kissed Haley and me on the cheek and headed off to bed.

"Talk to me Tigger, I mean you've had a big night."

I looked over at Haley and shook my head.

"I'm grateful for what Lucas did for me, but it doesn't change anything." I said eating some more of the ice cream.

"Yeah, but you at least can see that he's trying to correct the wrongs he's made. You should have seen him at the table when Chase finally caught up to you. Clay and Nathan were getting ready to beat his ass, but Lucas said just to follow his lead. Of course, Clay wasn't too happy about it, but it seemed to work." She said as she giggled.

I rolled my eyes.

"I'd be lying if I didn't say that it felt good to kiss him again and _be _with him again, but I don't think I can ever go back to that." I said and I placed my spoon in the kitchen sink.

"He'll come around and so will you." She said as she placed the ice cream back in the freezer and her spoon in the sink.

"Brooke he wants to be that guy for you. I mean I think it will take time for the both of you, but he's working on it." She winked at me.

"Goodnight Hales." I pulled her into a hug and she walked to her bedroom.

I walked upstairs and saw that Lucas's light was off. I walked into my bedroom and finally took off the heels I tried to ignore weren't killing my feet. When I cut my light on, I saw something on my bed. I crinkled my brow and walked over and reached for the envelope. There was a sticky note on top of it.

_Baby steps pretty girl. –Lucas_

I pulled out the piece of paper within the envelope and I gasped.

_Lucas, _

_If you are reading this then I have passed on. I remember when your mother told me she was pregnant with you. I was seventeen and heading off to college to play basketball. I panicked and just left. Then three months later I found out that Deb was pregnant and then it made me realize that I couldn't leave another woman and child behind. So I made a sacrifice. I chose Deb and Nathan over you and Karen. I know there is no justice in that, but sometimes second chances are available and you have to take them while you can. It got to a point where your mother didn't care to have me in your life and I respected that. I've always respected that. So when you were around five, I decided to start putting money away for you and your mother. I know it doesn't make up for all the years I've missed in your life and all the time I could have been a father to you. I also know that you and Nathan have been spending time together, you both don't hide it that well and that's okay. I never hated you Lucas, you have to believe that. I put on a front so that you would hate me. That you wouldn't question if I just made a mistake or anything. I wanted you to hate me because nothing I possibly could have said or done would have changed the fact that I abandoned you and your mother for another family. I just hope that you will always be there for Nathan. I want to leave you enough money to make up for the small things and the big things I've missed out on. Your mother deserves to be taken care of for the rest of her life and I can provide that for the both of you. The only fatherly advice I'll leave you with is this…I see you with Brooke Davis and I know how you act like you are a tough guy with no feelings, trust me I was that kid in high school. Learn to open your heart to those who love you. Let Brooke in and let her see the love I know you possess. I've always been looking out for you and checking in on you. You're a good kid and I'd like to think you didn't inherit all my bad qualities. Maybe in another life you could love me and I could be there for you always. _

_I love you son, _

_Dan_

While I was reading the letter I had managed to fall to my knees and I was shaking with tears. I wanted to reach out to him. I wanted to pull him in my arms and tell him that I love him. I wanted to tell him again and let him know that I was here for him. That I never stopped loving him. It seemed that everything was making more sense to me. Lucas believed that he was like Dan. Lucas was nothing like Dan and I will do anything to help him see that.

I looked back at the sticky note. _Baby steps pretty girl –Lucas. _

He was trying and he started with this: the letter from Dan. I changed clothes and walked through the bathroom into Lucas's room. He was in bed and I could hear his breathing. I tiptoed over to his bed and sat down on it. His chest rose up and down as he breathed. I leaned over and kissed him on his forehead.

"Thanks Luke." I whispered and started tiptoeing back to my room.

"You're welcome." I heard him say through a sleepy voice and I smiled.

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><p><strong>AWE! YAY! Thoughts? Next up: the chapter will focus on Lana (puke) and Lucas...Brooke runs into a familiar person! Any guesses? :)<strong>

**Stay tuned!**


	6. Lana and

**A/N: Alright first of all! I have a Brucas one shot posted up right now and I expect all of you to read it! ;) It's called Leave Him...and I figured I could squeeze in one more chapter before I get serious with finals and papers! So here you go!**

**Review replies:**

**_XHush-HushX:_you are so right! Baby steps indeed and we are getting to understand and see things a little more clearly with Lucas, but this chapter...ha you might hate me lol**

**_xXal__ienatedXx:_yay I'm glad you like it and I am glad you will read my other stories!**

_**pam:**_** Hey thanks for just reviewing! I don't care if it's short! **

_**alysef:**___**WOOHOO! I am a favorite author! Awe shucks! yes, you and I have become besties with the reviews of each other's stories lol, I am glad you enjoy my writing as I enjoy yours... thanks for loving my writing as I hope to only improve with each new piece I write! Yes Lucas is indeed starting to open up little by little but of course at what cost? This chapter it seems will take a few steps back you know the saying...two steps forward and then two steps back**...**seems to be a slogan for Lucas!**

_**heartskipsabeat:**___**Yay a newbie review! I'm glad you like this and I also love that they are still young and enjoying their lives in their early twenties! It's how it's supposed to be! Yeah there will be some more Naley but of course 90% focus on Brucas ;)**

**_craxygirl54: _Yes Luke was awesome in the Dinner chapter...in this one...I'll let you be the judge of that :) **

**_ImAnon,  rockdragon293, Brucas7, OTHCharmfan,  dianehermans: _thank you allll so much for loving this story and reviewing! It means alot even if it is one word! **

**Enjoy!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 6: Lana and...<strong>

A few weeks has passed since our dinner and run in with Chase. Classes have started up in full swing and Lucas was able to get into a couple of writing courses. It was so strange to watch him as a college student. We were all seniors now and Haley, Nathan, and I will get to graduate at the end of the semester. Lucas and Rachel will get to squeeze in some more classes over the summer term to get their full credits and graduate in August. I was sad. College was almost over for us and where were we all going? I have no idea. Part of it made me sad, because I didn't want to lose what we had here in Durham. I loved living with Nathan and Haley, the couple who can't keep their hands off each other. I love having Rachel live in walking distance and I can see her whenever. I loved that Clay would visit any chance he is given and deep down I loved having Lucas under the same roof as me as well.

After that night at dinner when Lucas and I pretended to be dating in front of Chase things got weird. Lucas became the one to drift away a little. He was becoming that guy I didn't like very well, but at the same time he was there for me as a friend. I don't know what my problem is but I just wanted him so desperately to flirt with me, be in my bed when I wake up and he have that cocky ass grin on his face, but no, he wasn't doing that anymore.

I was walking back to my car from my last class for the day and I saw Lucas arguing with a girl I've never seen before. I kept my distance to not act like I am listening to their conversation. Lucky for me, Lucas's back was to me. I could hear what he was saying to her, but I could barely hear what she was saying.

"I don't give a flying fuck what you thought was the best decision for either of us!" He said raising his voice. Most of the students were in class, my class let out early so they didn't have an audience…well except for me.

"Lucas, I'm…it's just not what I wanted and I was really worried about you."

I managed to get closer to hear what she was saying.

"Lana, it should have never happened to begin with. I told you if we slept together, it wouldn't be serious and near the end you made it serious!" He held his hand up in the air.

I flinched to hear him say those words. I remembered hearing those exact words or a version of those words so long ago.

_I can't believe I told him that I loved him. The look on his face didn't help matters either. After we had amazing sex yet again…I dressed and left his place. I just really needed someone to talk too. Nathan and Haley were out of town with her family so I walked the familiar steps to the old white house with the black door and let myself in. It's what I've always done. The music would be too loud so knocking and ringing the door bell would be useless. _

_I heard something…and I wasn't sure if I should keep walking or just turn around to leave, but I found myself compelled to see what the hell was going on. I turned the corner to her room and I felt my heart break into a million pieces. _

_Metallica was screaming in the background and I watched the love of my life fucking my best friend. He was on top of her pounding into her ferociously. Her legs were wrapped tight around his waist as her nails dug into his shoulders. He hissed her name in ecstasy when she did that and I flinched. I thought that was only something he did with me, or so he told me. _

_I wanted to scream! I wanted to run away but my body wouldn't move. Not only was he fucking her, but with his hand he brought it up to her face, brushed the hair away, and kissed her intensely. _

_I let out a cry and it was like a trigger to them both. They both released their orgasms and Lucas fell on top of her. The song ended and my cry was finally heard. They both looked at me. I was shaking. The looks were one in the same. Guilt. Peyton started to form tears in her eyes and Lucas still on top of her and inside her probably just looked at me like, 'this wasn't supposed to happen' and it was more directed to me than with Peyton. _

"_Brooke." Peyton spoke and I was finally able to find my drive to move. _

_I ran out of the house. _

"_Brooke!" The rough voice screamed my name._

_I stopped and turned to face him in just his boxers._

"_How could you do that?" I asked him tears streaming down my face. I don't even know why I bothered. I knew this was going to happen. How could I have been so stupid to believe that I, me, Brooke Davis, pure of heart, could change the bad-boy, I don't have a care in the world, Lucas Scott. _

"_It just…fuck, this wasn't supposed to happen." He motioned between me and him._

"_Oh I'm sorry. It's all my fault! May I remind you, you were the one to make the first move!" I pointed at him._

"_You're right, Brooke, I was, but damn it, you teased me, you always teased me and I fell for it!" He stopped and I just scowled at him._

"_Fuck you Lucas!" I started to walk away again and he spoke._

"_It wasn't supposed to get serious! I told you it wasn't and when you said you loved me!"_

"_Don't!" I hissed at him, "Don't you dare fucking bring that up! Of course, I love you, you fucking ass hole. You are my best friend, of course, I am going to love you. I am just a fucking idiot for falling **in** love with you!" I ran off and he didn't follow me. _

That was the last time I ever really spoke to him face to face. A tear dared to leave my eye, but I squeezed my eyes tight and focused on their conversation again.

"I know okay? But a baby Luke? I couldn't have that with you and everything that is going on with you!"

I dropped my books at the mention of a baby. She was pregnant? The two beauties turned to look at me and I was caught. Fuck!

"Brooke?" Lucas asked angrily.

"I'm…I'm sorry…I was just leaving my class and…" I was on the ground not making eye contact and trying desperately to pick up my books and papers.

He was by my side helping me. I touched his hand and he jerked it away. The gorgeous raven haired girl was by our side.

"You're Brooke. It's finally nice to put a face with the name." She said innocently.

I was finally able to get back on my feet and I looked at her and then at Lucas who was not happy at all.

"Yes and you are?" I asked not really understanding any of this.

"Lana. Lana Lang. I went to NYU with Lucas." She held her hand out and I shook it.

"Brooke, why don't you head home. I'll see you in a little bit."

"Lucas." Lana and I both said at the same time.

I became enraged with jealousy. Who does this girl think she is? She doesn't know Lucas like I do…nobody can ever possibly know Luke like I do and it killed me for her to speak his name the same way I do. I was going to speak again, but Lucas cut me off.

"Brooke, go home." He said roughly and grabbed Lana by the arm as they walked away.

She looked over her shoulder at me and then jerked her arm from his grip. They disappeared out of my sight and I felt my body shake again. I needed a drink. I walked to Charlie's, our favorite bar and grill, we always go too.

"Brooke Davis. Haven't seen you here in awhile." Owen tossed a cardboard coaster that had a picture of a four leaf clover on the bar in front of me and I let out that pout.

"Ah, a dry martini kind of day?" He asked me.

"Try a tall stout kind of day." I said to him and his eyes went wide.

"Well, not to sound too cliché but I am a bartender and a good listener if you want to talk about it. You want any food?" He asked me as he placed the dark, black, homemade beer in front of me and I nodded.

"Okay, one sloppy cheeseburger and fries coming right up." He winked at me and I smiled.

An old basketball game was on and I watched it absentmindedly. Four stout beers later, I was extremely buzzed.

"Why do you all suck?" I bitterly coughed out. Owen chuckled.

"Excuse me?" He said wiping a glass he just washed.

"You boys, men, no you're boys, you are such ass holes! I mean are you just incapable of love from a woman who will do anything," and I leaned closer to him, "and I mean _anything_ for them and for you dicks to just toss it away like it's nothing." I had my beer in one hand and using it, I gestured around the room.

"Angel, I'm sorry if a tool broke your heart, but you're better than this. I mean do you remember your all mighty highness ass strutting in here like you owned the place. What happened to her?" He asked with a smile on his face.

"She realized that she's still in love with the one who broke her heart and it's never going to be anybody else."

"That sucks. That ass hole still being an ass hole."

My head snapped away from Owen to see a familiar face. He sat next to me and smiled as he ate one of my cold fries.

"I know you." I said slurring my words.

"I sure hope so. I am still a little upset you never called me." He said winking at me.

I studied him for a moment. He had dirty blonde curly hair and gorgeous caramel eyes. His skin was tan and his body was fit. He was nothing like Lucas, but close enough for my standards on the scale of gorgeousness.

"The beach!" I said cheerily and he nodded.

"Yes, but do you remember my name."

"I am sure she doesn't remember her own name." Owen chimed in and I glared at him.

"Caleb." I said quickly and smiled at Owen as he rolled his eyes.

"I'm impressed. So sweetheart, why are you in here mid afternoon drinking your sorrows away about that idiot who drilled a ball into my face." He said as he ordered a drink from Owen.

I brought my hand to my mouth.

"Oh my God, I am so sorry. Are you okay?" I placed my hand on his arm and he began to laugh.

"Well considering that happened weeks ago, yes, I am fine."

I began to laugh too.

"I'm sorry, it's just…I found out something today…and well I don't even know what it means, it just really upset me." I said turning back to my beer and Owen and Caleb were very close to me.

"What did…Lucas was that his name? What did he do?" Caleb asked as he started to drink his beer.

"Nothing, that's the problem, I just…I want him to be able to talk to me like he used too…and I feel like after him catching me eavesdropping on him today…that I have ruined that." I began to sniffle and I was doing my damnedest to hold back the tears.

"Sugar plum, am I going to have to kick some ass." Owen said throwing his towel on the countertop.

"No, Owen, it's fine. We were on the path to becoming the friends we once were, and I feel I may have broken that today."

Caleb, Owen, and I carried on a conversation about life, college, and sports. I was actually having a great time and forgot about Lucas, but then again seven beers of stout beer will do that to you. My phone began to ring continuously throughout my time here at the bar and I ignored every last call including the text messages.

"Brooke Penelope Davis!"

I cringed at the motherly voice and Owen laughed and leaned in.

"You're in so much trouble." He said and I swatted gently at his face.

"Yes mom." I said and turned to face an extremely pissed off Haley.

"I have been freaking out. You wouldn't answer your phone. Nathan and I have been looking all over for you! Lucas is pacing a hole in the floor at the house."

My ears perked up to hear Lucas sound worried about me.

"What did he say?" I asked and the two guys around me were listening intently.

"He came home and asked where you were. He said that you were supposed to be there and then you didn't show up for your shift and Angela called me and said you never miss work."

"Shit!" I grabbed Caleb's wrist and looked down at his watch. It was six thirty and I was supposed to be at work at five.

"I can not believe I have been here for three hours." I brought my hand to my face and it all started to sink in…I was feeling sick.

"Don't worry about it. I lied for you and covered for your ass, but Tigger, what happened today?" She finally noticed Caleb.

"Oh hey, beach boy." She said as she held out her hand.

"And you must be Mom?" He said making them both bust out in giggles.

"To this one anyways. Haley." She said as she sat next to me at the bar.

"Glass of water, Owen, please." She said and she took my hand in hers.

"What's going on?" She asked me.

"Well, I am going to head out. It was good seeing you again, Brooke. Maybe you'll use my number one day." He said paying Owen and I stopped him.

"Wait!" I said a little too quickly and my vision blurred.

I grabbed the pen from behind Owen's ear and scribbled as neatly as I could my phone number on my coaster and tossed it to him.

"Are you sure?" He asked knowing that the feelings I spilled to him today about Lucas was a complete mess.

"I had fun today and you took my mind off things. Call me some time." I said.

He nodded and said bye to us all. I turned back to Haley and she grinned like the devil.

"I thought you were holding out for Lucas?" She asked me and my face fell.

"Oh honey, I'm sorry, what happened?"

I looked over at her and tears started to form in my eyes.

"So you know about Lana and a baby?" I asked her.

"Yeah, I do. I'm sorry I didn't tell you but like I said I wasn't really supposed to know either and I would have told you, but it wasn't my place too." She said stroking my hand in a motherly fashion. I smiled at the gesture.

"I know. I know. I was leaving campus today and I saw that Lucas was arguing with some girl and I just started listening to their conversation. Lana mentioned a baby and that's when I freaked and dropped my books. My presence became known."

"Wait, wait a minute. Lana is here?" She asked and I turned to look at her and nodded.

"Did Lucas not say anything when he came to the house?" I asked him.

"No, he came home in a broody mood. Went to your room and asked where you were. When I told him I haven't seen you, he seemed to go in panic mode. He tried calling you several times and then when Angela called, we all started to worry."

I still can't believe I missed work. I never miss work. I also can't believe that Lucas was worried about me. Well, I mean I know he cares, but after what happened today, I figured he would hate me.

"Come on, Tigger, let's get you home and into bed. Nathan and Lucas are worried sick about you."

Haley went to pay for my tab and as I began to protest, Owen held his hand up.

"It's on me, seriously. Angel, it will get better. Bring your ass around here a little more often, I miss my favorite girl."

I smiled at him and tossed him a fifty as a tip. I hurried out of the bar so he couldn't give it back and when the sun hit my face, I ran to the curb and threw up.

"Oh Tigger." Haley was by my side and helped me into her car.

We drove in silence and I had my eyes shut tightly. Haley's phone rang and it was Nathan.

"Yeah, she's fine, we'll be home in a few minutes." She said and that was the end of the conversation.

The car stopped and the car was spinning. I felt sick again but then there were two strong arms around me, carrying me into the house. I wasn't sure if it was Nathan or Lucas, but I had my money on Lucas. I haven't been this disoriented since Chase broke up with me.

"I found her at Charlie's." I heard Haley's voice drift off as Lucas carried me up the stairs.

My eyes opened slightly. We weren't in my room, we were in his. He laid me gently on the bed and began to take my shoes off.

"You had me worried." He said sternly and I just groaned and flipped on my stomach.

"So." I said nonchalantly.

"So? Damn it, Brooke. I don't worry about people. I don't drive myself crazy wondering if people are okay, but damn it, I drive myself crazy worrying about you."

I sat up too quickly and just looked at him. He looked like a mess. I could tell he's been crying; now whether that was over me or Lana and the baby talk, I wasn't sure but he looked awful.

"Whatever Lucas, why don't you run along and tell that to your girlfriend." I said like a nine year old who was jealous that the boy she likes gave his cookie to another girl.

"Damn it Brooke. You weren't supposed to be listening in on my conversation. If anything I should be the one who should be mad."

I looked up at him again and scowled.

"Well it seems like everyone else knows your dirty little secrets, so that doesn't prove much to me about you caring!" I yelled and yelling was not the best thing for me at the moment. I fell back to the bed and I heard Lucas go into the bathroom.

He came out with a glass of water and two painkillers. I jerked the glass from him and took the pills and lay back down.

"Why were you drinking?" He asked me.

"Does it matter?" I asked him.

"Well again Brooke, if anybody should be at a bar drinking it should be me. What's going on?"

The painkillers were working and I found myself falling into a deep slumber.

"Lucas, I lo—" I fell into a sleep.

_I had my eyes closed as his sweat dropped along my breasts. It was a feeling I loved. I made him sweat, I made him cum harder than most, and I made him scream for breath. His dick slid in and out of me with force but with care. I arched my back up and stuck out my breasts for his eager mouth. He quickly ran his tongue over each of my breast before taking one in his mouth. I gripped his shaggy hair tightly encouraging him to suck harder and fuck me harder. He did both. _

_I opened my eyes to find him looking up at me with my breast still in his mouth._

"_I love fucking you." He said breathlessly as if it was possible increasing his speed._

"_Me too." I strained._

_I lifted my legs and wrapped them around his waist squeezing and pulling him closer to me._

"_Fuck, baby…I…am…almost there." He struggled to get out._

"_Me too." I said again losing my fingers in his hair. I dragged one of my hands across his face and he took one of my fingers into his mouth and sucked on it gently and then bit it tenderly. I smirked._

"_Lucas…" I moaned and he increased his pumps._

"_Brooke…fuck…baby…" And he removed his dick and exploded on my stomach. _

_It was something I actually enjoyed. I made him do that, I was the one who made him release in ecstasy. Then I found myself doing something…that I never thought I would do. I reached down, took one of my fingers, dipped it in his juice and brought it to my mouth and licked it._

"_Fucking shit, Brooke." He said as he crashed his lips on to mine. _

_I got lost in his touch along my sides and his tongue was controlling mine. When he pulled back away from my mouth and attached it to my neck, I just said it._

"_I love you, Lucas." _

_His lips stopped moving against my neck. He pulled away from me, grabbed a towel, and wiped his liquid from my belly. I went to speak again, but he just brought his lips to mine almost causing it to bleed. We had sex again and it felt different this time. It was rougher, more animalistic. When we were done, he kissed me once more passionately and brushed the wet locks from my face._

"_My mom needs my help at the café tonight…I really should get ready." He said and I couldn't read his emotions. He kissed me and pulled out of me._

_I started to get dressed and he went into the bathroom and cut on the shower. I walked towards him with his back to me. _

"_Lucas…about what I said, I—"_

_He cut me off with a kiss._

"_Brooke, I'll see you tomorrow." _

_I left and little did I know that tomorrow when I was going to see him, he would be fucking my best friend._

I woke up quickly and looked around the room to find a half naked Lucas lying next to me in his arm was wrapped around me protectively and almost territorially. I lay back down and turned on my side to face him. He stirred and his eyes opened briefly and then closed again.

"You sober?" He asked sleepily.

"Are you going to talk to me?" I asked him.

"Are you sober?" He asked again with his eyes still closed.

"Yes." I said quietly looking up at him. His arm squeezed my waist and he turned on his back, rubbed his eyes, and looked up at the ceiling.

"I met Lana in one of my classes. We actually made a deal just to be friends because we had so much in common." He stopped and ran his hand across his face.

"I told her everything there is to know about you." He let out a small chuckle and I began to draw circles on his chest. He let out an appreciate moan and wrapped his arm around me pulling me against him.

"I don't even know how we ended up sleeping together. She had gotten a phone call from back home and got some devastating news and she just asked me to spend the night with her, just be with her. She started kissing me and I just felt compelled to give her one night where she could forget everything."

I continued to draw circles on his chest to encourage him to continue talking.

"The next morning it wasn't awkward, but I knew it would change things…it always changes things when you sleep with a friend." His arm tightened around me and I flinched a little.

"We continued to sleep with each other and she tells me she's pregnant and then aborts it before I have any say in any of it."

I felt his chest constrict and I knew he was holding back tears.

"You wanted a baby?" I asked him and he flinched underneath my touch.

"It's not that I just wanted a baby…I…" He stopped talking and released his arm from around me and sat up slowly in the bed and turned his back to me. He gripped the edge of the bed tightly.

"Lucas, what else is going on? I mean I did hear Lana say something like you didn't need a baby with everything else that is going on…Lucas talk to me." I scooted closer to him and placed my hand on his lower back.

I did something I shouldn't have done. I lowered my lips to his shoulder and kissed it. He let out a small moan. He got up from the bed and turned to look at me.

"It's nothing. Hell, now I'm not even so sure I wanted a kid. I am going to take a shower." He walked into the bathroom and I lay back down in his bed.

What the hell! I mean just when I think he is finally able to open up to me about everything…he clams up again. Whatever, I am not doing this. I gave Caleb my number and I just hope that he calls me, because I can not keep torturing myself like this. I heard the water cut on and I got up from his bed and walked downstairs. I can't believe I slept for fourteen hours. It was nearly nine in the morning and I felt like shit once I came into the kitchen.

"You doing okay, Davis?"

I turned to face Nathan and he jumped back.

"Whoa…you look like the crypt keeper."

Great, so I look like shit, and I was all cuddly with Lucas a moment ago, no wonder he pulled away from me.

"Thanks, Nate." I said as I rolled my eyes. I started a pot of coffee.

"I am heading out for practice. I'll see ya Brooke."

"Hey Nate." I said and he turned around.

"Is Lucas okay?"

His face fell and he looked upstairs and then at me.

"Brooke…I—"

"You can't tell me. I get it." I turned away from him and then I heard him walk closer to me.

"Brooke, he will tell you, I promise."

"I know about Lana and the baby." I said still staring at the coffee pot.

"No, it's not that…he'll _tell_ you when he's ready. I mean I don't support every decision Lucas makes, but with this one, just…just give him time." He rests his hand on my shoulder and gives it a firm squeeze and then leaves.

I pour myself a cup of coffee and look upstairs as I hear him come out of the bathroom. I just want him to tell me. I want him to tell me everything but is it fair for me to put my life on hold for him when I don't even know what I am supposed to be waiting for?

I started walking back upstairs and into my bedroom. I swing the door behind me but I never heard it shut. I turn around and Lucas is standing in between my door and the hallway.

"Would you want to grab dinner tonight with me?" He asked almost like a shy teenager.

"What's the occasion?" I ask turning away from him and setting my cup on my nightstand.

"Just two friends grabbing dinner."

I noticed the blinking light on my cell phone and I pick it up and checked my messages.

_Hey Brooke, it's Caleb. I tried calling but you didn't answer, but I was thinking maybe you and me could grab dinner tonight? _

I bit my bottom lip and I sent my reply and turned to Lucas.

"Um, actually I can't tonight. I have plans." I said as I dropped my phone onto my bed. I saw his face fall a little and he waved his hand.

"It's fine. I'll see ya later."

He had his satchel slung over his shoulder and he closed my door. My phone rang and I answered it.

"Hello?"

"_Hey, I'm glad you agreed to go to dinner with me tonight. How about I pick you up around seven?" _

I bit my lip again and wondered if that was a good idea. I mean I am not sure if Lucas would be here or not, but why would it matter? I am single and I can do whatever I want.

"Uh sure. I'll shoot you a text of my address." I smiled.

"_Good deal. I'll see you tonight, Brooke." _

I smiled and hung up the phone. Maybe this is what I need, to get back into the dating world. I called Rachel.

"Hey lady, um, I have a date tonight and…I need your help."

* * *

><p><strong>Thoughts? Now a lot of you wanted to see where Caleb and Brooke could go...so I am writing that in the story...and I think it will be a useful push for Brooke and Lucas. So dinner for Caleb and Brooke. Lucas goes to see Lana...(oh yeah she'll still be around a minute)...and someone else pops their head into town...who is it? Guesses? Stay tuned!<strong>


	7. The Old Me

**A/N: I hope everyone checks out my Brucas one shot, It Never Ends! It's new and it's great...I think. :)**

**I was able to have a night off tonight so I wanted to get a chapter in on one of my stories! Alright this one is fun and I have decided to leave my spite of Lana alone and use it towards someone else who may be appearing in this story! ;) We are getting closer to the rest of Lucas's secret!  
><strong>

**ENJOY!  
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><p><strong>Chapter 7: "The Old Me"<strong>

"**This is the best party ever!" –Tipper, What Happens in Vegas**

It is time to be _me_ again! Owen said it, "_Do you remember your all mighty highness ass strutting in here like you owned the place. What happened to her?"_

Well guess what world, she's coming back in full fledge and is going to make everyone know that she is worth everything.

"Okay so I brought pretty much everything!" Rachel strutted in my bedroom carrying tons of dresses and a bag which I assumed were overstuffed with stripper heels.

"Okay Ray I don't want to actually look like a slut." I said with a giggle.

She dropped her hands by her side as her mouth fell open slightly.

"Then what the hell am I doing here?" She asked me confused.

I couldn't help but laugh at her again. I turned to face her and I smiled.

"Well everyone keeps reminding me even you that I'm not really myself anymore so I have a date tonight and I want to look like the old me." I said it as I did a quick little twirl and she just stared at me dumbfounded.

She smirked and kinked her head to the side and placed her index finger in between her teeth as the gages and dials began to turn in her pretty little head.

"I got it!" She did a 'ta da' gesture and began to rummage through her bags of goodies as she tossed me a black as night dress and pulled out a pair of suede hot pink heels.

"I like where this is going." I said as I grinned from ear to ear.

I began to change into the dress and Rachel stopped me.

"Um take it off!" She demanded and at first I wasn't sure what she was referring to, but knowing Rachel she was pointing to my undergarments.

I removed my bra and then slipped the dress over my hips and slipped my underwear down my legs and kicked them off to the side. I ran my hands along the silky smooth material of the dress and grinned. I remembered this dress from one of Rachel's modeling shows in Paris.

"Rachel, I can't wear this." I said to her as I turned to face her.

"Bitch, wear the damn dress." She kinked her eyebrow and I smiled.

She walked over to me and ran her hand up my leg.

"Okay legs are smooth, now raise the arms."

I did as I was told and she examined my under arms. She nodded and began to work on my hair. My hair had grown along my shoulders over the past few weeks. She began to curl my hair in waves and she did my make up. I looked at the time and it was getting close to seven. I walked in front of my mirror and I had to take a step back as I almost didn't look like myself. I looked older but in a mature, fashionable way. I loved it and I loved being able to feel like _me_ again.

"Damn lady I think I might just take you out on a date."

I looked over my shoulder and smiled at her.

"You know Lucas is downstairs." Rachel plopped down on her stomach across my bed.

"So?" I said as I checked myself out again in the mirror to make sure I did look breathtaking.

"So? Wow you really are turning back into the _you_ we all miss." She grinned and I turned to face her as I went to search for the perfect clutch to match.

"You do realize that you are going to give Lucas a heart attack when you walk downstairs and you might even kill him when he sees that you are going on a date."

Giving Lucas a heart attack is the last thing I ever want to do but I can't put my life on hold for him any longer. I wanted to feel alive again and be the girl I worked so hard to become before I dated Lucas. I found the perfect purse and began transferring my belongings to it.

"Lucas is a big boy. He can take care of himself. Tonight is about me and besides he has his own problems to worry about." I did a touch up on my lip gloss and Rachel followed me down the stairs.

_Pretend like he's not here. Pretend like he's not here. _I had to keep telling myself that. When I came into view I got a round of whistles and "ow ows." I rolled my eyes.

"Damn B. Davis." Nathan said with his mouth hitting the floor.

"Sexy momma!" Haley said as she walked over and smacked my ass.

I never once looked at Lucas, but looking out the corner of my eye I could see his face turn a deadly shade of red, his lips in a thin hard line, and his eyes…those cobalt eyes were burning holes through my body. But I didn't care, _pretend he's not here_.

"Thanks guys! I thought I would get back into the old me. I miss the old me." I said with a grin.

"Yeah…where has she been this entire time?" Nathan mocked me as his head kinked towards Lucas unbeknownst to him.

"She's been on vacation but she's back and she's ready to play." I said in my sultry voice and as Lucas was about to speak, there was a knock on the door.

"I'll get it!" Rachel said gladly. I smiled.

She opened the door and damn did that boy know how to clean up. Caleb's dirty blonde waves hung loosely around his scalp. He was wearing a gorgeous shade of royal blue with a pair of black slacks that hugged his figure very well. He looked great and for a moment I felt extremely overdressed. His eyes fell on me instantly.

"Wow." The only thing he needed to say to make the smile dance gracefully across my face.

"Right back at ya handsome." I walked over to him and pulled him into a sensual hug.

"Caleb, you haven't met Rachel, but this is Rachel. Rachel this is Caleb."

They shook each other's hands and then the other sets of eyes zoned in on us quickly.

"Caleb, you remember Haley, Nathan and…Lucas."

"Yeah good to see you guys again." Caleb said genuinely.

Lucas got up and charged over to us. I slinked my arm through Caleb's and pulled him closer to me.

"She's a very special girl. You take care of her tonight." Lucas held out his hand and Caleb placed his in a firm handshake between the two men.

I looked over at Lucas and for a brief moment we made eye contact.

"Okay well we're heading out. Don't wait up." I said playfully.

Everyone said their goodbyes and when I walked outside I was surprised at the type of vehicle Caleb was driving. It was a hunter green '66 Chevy Impala refurbished to its glory days.

"Wow nice set of wheels." I said as he went to open the passenger door for me.

"It's something that I do. I rebuild cars with my dad."

I slipped in smoothly and he closed the door.

"You know cars?" He asked me.

"_So what are we doing today?" I asked as I sat on the spinning stool._

"_Keith and I are going to rebuild this 1967 Ford Mustang." A fifteen year old Lucas Scott looked over at his uncle with the largest grin I've ever seen him display before._

"_We sure are. Brooke would you like to help?" _

_I went to open my mouth to speak but Lucas cut me off._

"_Uncle Keith come on, she's a girl, I am sure she would rather read one of the girly magazines you have up front when ladies want to wait on their cars to be fixed." _

_My mouth dropped in anger at him and I pulled my hair back into a messy ponytail and walked over to the two Scotts._

"_Instruct away Uncle Keith." I said pursing my lips at Lucas as his mouth dropped in surprise._

"_The lady wants in...good thing."_

_I was supposed to meet up with Peyton later that afternoon but I ended up spending the rest of the evening with Lucas and Keith helping out as much as I could to fix up the car I have fallen in love with. _

_Keith taught me everything I know about cars and Lucas and I would quiz each other all the time on who knew cars better._

"I know a thing or two about them. I helped Lucas and his uncle, rebuild a '67 mustang." I said as I looked over at him and he gave me this look.

"I'm surprised."

"In a good way?" I asked as I fastened my seat belt and he started the engine.

"Of course." He said and we began driving down the streets of Durham.

I was really hoping we weren't going somewhere too fancy. I've had my share of fancy treats over the past few weeks. I just wanted to have fun, feel young and care free again and as if he could read my mind, he pulled into _Sergio's Italian_.

"It's like you read my mind." I said as I looked over at him and he smiled.

"Well I figured there would be no surprise if I took you somewhere you expected me to take you." He said as he cut the engine off and walked over to my side of the car and opened my door. He held his hand out for me and I took it.

Sergio's was like a chill, fun place to grab cheap, great Italian while still feeling you are out for a special occasion. Once inside, we got a booth near the back and we ordered a bottle of wine.

"How about I order you my favorite dish and you order yours for me." I said with a cheeky grin.

He smiled. I ordered him the spicy romano shrimp and he ordered for me the Italian sirloin with a mushroom gorgonzola sauce.

"You do realize there is no pasta in that dish." I said as I took another sip of my wine.

"I love their sirloin here." He said as he leaned up on his elbows on the table and leaned near me.

"So Brooke Davis, where are you from?" He asked me.

"Well, we are all from Tree Hill. Actually none of us planned to all head to the same place but we kind of did with the exception of Lucas and Rachel." I said as I took another sip of wine and he refilled my glass.

"Oh yeah, well they're here now." He said a little confused.

"Well Rachel initially got a modeling gig and traveled all over Europe doing shows and Lucas went to NYU. He recently moved here after some hardships, but I really don't want to talk about him." I said as I leaned over the table and began to glide my finger along the inside of his wrist.

"I agree."

A few minutes later our food arrived and we began to dig in. Of course like always when I start drinking I can't help but eat everything in sight. Everything he didn't finish, I used my share of the bread to dip in his sauce and ate the rest of it.

"Dessert?" The waitress asked us.

I looked over at Caleb and grinned.

"Check please." I said.

"No dessert?" He asked.

"Let's go and have some fun." I said leaning into him.

* * *

><p>I had no right getting jealous or upset. We weren't together but that doesn't mean it still doesn't hurt. I was talking to Nathan with my back to the stairs when Nathan and Haley started whistling. When I turned around it was like I forgot how to breathe. She looked absolutely to die for. Everything about her was perfect. She reminded me of the care free spirit from high school. She was the girl who when she turned a corner every guy within sight wanted to fuck her and every girl begged to be her. I felt my pants getting tight just by the sight of her so I had to think of dead babies to keep my boner away.<p>

I wasn't sure what was going on but as soon as the doorbell rang I knew that she had a date. She never once looked at me directly and when Rachel opened the door, I recognized the guy immediately. It was the guy from the beach a few weeks back and a part of me was crushed that she chose to go out with him but I pretty much pushed her in that direction. I found myself charging towards them and I stopped and thought about what I was going to say.

"She's a very special girl. You take care of her tonight." I held my hand out to him and he shook my hand firmly and confidently.

I looked over at Brooke quickly and I saw a flicker of surprise and she mouthed me a thank you and we all said our goodbyes and they walked out together.

I gripped my phone tightly in my hand and turned to Nathan.

"Can I see your keys?" I asked him.

"You better not follow them." Rachel held her perfect little finger in my face and I shooed it away.

"Relax Red. I have my own priorities to deal with."

She held her finger up again wanting to protest me because she didn't believe me. I bit it hard and she was able to get it free and smacked me lightly on the chest. I grinned at her and she winked. Nathan tossed me his keys.

"Luke, be careful." Haley said.

"I will. See ya guys." I grabbed my beanie and my jacket and hopped in the Jeep.

I drove the roads that took me a little over a week to register my surroundings and get used to where I was going. Now it was like a second nature to me. I could close my eyes if I wanted to and I knew exactly where I was going. I reached my destination, took a deep breath, and knocked on the door.

The door opened and there she stood in her plaid pajama set and her hair tied high in a ponytail on top of her head.

"Lucas?" She questioned.

"Can I come in?" I held my lips in a hard line and she stepped aside.

I walked in and saw that the room was very bland and her stuff was still packed in her suitcase. That was always Lana keeping everything in order and neat.

"What are you doing here?" She questioned.

"What are _you_ doing here?" We never finished our conversation yesterday as I wasn't ready to deal with her and then Brooke never came home.

"You know why I'm here." She said as she crossed her arms across her chest.

"Lana actually I don't! I told you everything I needed when I left New York and then you come here and seek me out!" I found myself yelling at her.

She stomped her foot.

"Damn it Lucas. With your heart, I was just worried about you and I have a feeling none of your friends know what's going on!" She yelled back at me.

"My brother knows and honestly you have no fucking right to know my business about this either." I shouldn't have snapped at her like that but I still couldn't get over the abortion.

"Why did you really do it Lana?" I stepped closer to her and it was almost as if I was cornering her.

"Because I didn't want _your_ child Lucas!" She screamed at me and her hand shot up to her mouth.

The way she said it. The way it just easily came out of her mouth. It's like she's known all along that even carrying my offspring was so revolting to her. I turned my back to her.

"Luke, I'm…that didn't come out the way I wanted it too."

I turned to face her and I felt the hot tears fall down my face.

"No I get it. I am such a fucking screw up that why would anyone want a part of that in their child." I started to walk past her and she reached for my arm.

I snatched away from her touch.

"Lucas, no, please, I didn't mean for it to sound like that." She said and she stopped me again.

"Lana, I want you to go back to New York." I reached for the door and she grabbed my arm again.

"Lucas I don't want kids and I don't want a child with you because you don't love me." She looked up at me and I still couldn't talk to her about this.

"Just go back to New York Lana, there's nothing here for you." I walked out the door and slammed it shut behind me.

"Fuck!" I said as I ran my hands through my hair.

I reached for my phone and sent a text.

_I need to drink. Meet at Charlie's?_

Not even two seconds later…

_On my way_

I drove to the bar and was able to get a parking spot in front of the bar. I locked the Jeep and walked inside. I walked up to the bar and was glad that it was packed with people drinking, smoking, and having a good time.

"Hey man! What can I get you?" The buff guy behind the bar tossed me a cardboard coaster.

"Beer." I said looking over my shoulder.

"Seems like you're not having a good night?" He said and I turned to face him and for some reason I didn't care to unload my problems on this guy.

"Yeah the shittiest." I said as he placed a dark ale in front of me.

I started sipping my drink when a slender arm draped around my neck and I immediately knew who it belonged too.

"Owen, babe, get me a double vodka on the rocks."

"Anything for you Red."

She plopped down next to me and I turned to face her. She was wearing the tightest hip hugging jeans and an emerald green top that exposed the lower half of her stomach.

"What's going on dickhead?" She said as she finished her drink in one sip and nodded for another.

I grinned at her and shook my head. There was something about Rachel and me. We had this bond that no one not even Brooke could understand. We were both full of ourselves and she would keep my secrets from Brooke like it was nothing.

"Lana didn't want my kid. I mean can I blame her? I am a complete fuck up with no potential to make any woman happy especially the one I really want." I chugged my entire beer and nodded towards the bartender.

"Shut the fuck up!" Rachel shouted as she smacked me across the back of my head.

"First of all, I don't know this Lana chic and if I did I would slap her across her face. Lucas, stop putting yourself down no wonder why Brooke went out on this date." Rachel finished her drink and still looking at me tapped the bar and the bartender refilled her glass.

"What are you talking about?" I asked her.

"You aren't manning up! Seriously Luke. You have known Brooke for forever and you really have to take baby steps with her?"

I couldn't believe this. I sometimes wondered if Rachel told me personal things about Brooke in spite of her or because she really wanted this to work out between us.

"Rachel you don't understand. I don't do relationships, I don't do love and I…" I killed half of my beer and she finished my sentence for me.

"You love her! Is it really that hard for you to say it out loud?" If she had said it any louder I am sure the whole bar would have known.

"It's not that simple Rachel." I said finishing my beer and copying Rachel's actions. I tapped the bar and the bartender immediately sat a new beer in front of me.

"What are you so afraid of?" She asked me.

"Everything. Rachel, there are things you don't know, things that nobody knows except for Nathan. I am having problems with my—"

"Oh shit!" Rachel was staring at the door and I followed her gaze.

In walked Brooke and Caleb and that gorgeous smile of hers lit up the bar.

"Brooke Davis!"

I turned to the bartender and he walked from around the bar and towards Brooke. He wrapped his huge arms around her spinning her around. He gave Caleb a manly five and the three of them started walking towards the pool tables.

I looked back at Rachel and she smirked.

"Just act like we're not here and didn't notice. Trust me it will get under her skin." She whispered to me.

The buff bartender came back and made two drinks and brought them over to Brooke and Caleb. He walked back and looked at Rachel.

"Hey Brooke is here. Are you going to say hi?" He said cleaning a beer glass.

"She's on a date! I'm not going to intrude. Get my man Lucas here a shot on me!"

It was like a something clicked in the bartender's head as he heard my name. I raised an eyebrow at him.

"So you're Lucas." He said with a shake of his head.

"Yeah and you are?" I questioned.

Someone was obviously talking about me and I had one particular brunette in mind. He slid two shots onto the bar and Rachel and I clinked our glasses and took them together.

"Owen, nice to put a face to the name." He said sternly.

"Shut it, O. Come on broody, be giddy instead." She winked.

I looked over at Brooke who still had no idea I was here and she was flaunting herself around the pool table around a bunch of guys and I turned my attention back to Rachel.

"Let's do this." I said.

We carried on drinking and laughing and about thirty minutes after Brooke and Caleb's arrival, Caleb came to the bar and spotted us.

"Lucas?" He questioned.

I had my back to him and Rachel looked over my shoulder. I turned around.

"Caleb!" I said a little too drunk and he just grinned.

"Hey man! I didn't know you guys were here. Would you want to join us?" He said pointing over to Brooke who seemed like she was having the time of her life.

"Thanks Caleb, but we're actually thinking about going back to the house. Pool party?" Rachel questioned as she slinked her arm around my neck getting very close to my face.

"Yeah pool party! You are more than welcome to come back, I'm sure Brooke would love to join. Hey invite the whole group over there!" I pointed to their pool table and Brooke finally noticed my presence. We locked eyes and I grinned as big as I could.

Rachel and I battled over who would pay the bill and I wrapped my arm around her waist and brought her close to me.

"See ya at the house!" I yelled over at Caleb and Brooke and I saw her give him a questioning look.

Once we were outside I looked over at Rachel.

"You do realize that Nathan and Haley are going to be pissed."

She looked at me with that devilish grin of hers and winked at me.

"Luke, you forget who I am. I'm Rachel Fucking Gatina. I'm already five steps ahead of you."

I raised my eyebrow and drove us back to the house and I was surprised to already see tons of people parked outside the house. I looked over at her and her smile got bigger. Once inside there were people everywhere, a few I recognized from a few of my classes and then faces I only knew from the television. Pounding down the stairs Clay had on some sunglasses and holding a large beer funnel. Half of the Charlotte Bobcats were in my apartment and I had a star struck moment.

"You already planned this?" I turned to Rachel and she was just a grinning.

"Lukey come on, it's _me_." She winked and bounced over to Clay and jumped in his arms.

Of course she didn't plan _this_, she knew that Clay was coming home and she has somehow managed to get him on the Brooke and Lucas train. Haley and Nathan were already outside drinking and having a good time. Having half of the Bobcats team face to face with me and Nathan was heaven for us. I hurried upstairs and changed into a pair of swimming trunks. Once back downstairs, there was still no sign of Brooke, but I knew Brooke would be here.

* * *

><p>I was having a great time flaunting my body and getting every guy in the place to watch me. I was looking for Caleb and as I spotted him my heart nearly sank as I saw him talking to Lucas with Rachel sitting next to him. What the hell? How long have they been there? Lucas gave me one of his biggest grins and was pointing towards me. I saw Caleb nod and shake Lucas's hand as Lucas patted him on the back. Rachel and Lucas argued over paying the tab it seemed and Caleb finally made his way back to me as Lucas and Rachel were leaving arms wrapped around each other. I knew it was innocent but Lucas never wrapped his arms around me like that in public.<p>

"See ya at the house!" I heard Lucas shout out to us as he winked at me.

I turned to Caleb.

"What was that about?" I asked him as I rested my hands against his chest.

"There's a pool party going on at your place tonight. They invited me and you of course." He smiled.

What were those two planning?

"Do you want to go?" He asked me.

It didn't really matter did it? I mean by the time we are done with our night, I would end up back at the house anyways with the party still going on but I didn't plan on bringing Caleb with me.

"How about we hang out here a little longer and then head back. I mean I live there, I'm sure the party will continue forever into the night." I smiled at him.

We stuck around a little longer as some of Caleb's friends from the beach showed up and we played a few games of pool. I asked them all to come back to my place for this supposed pool party. We carpooled in Caleb's friend, Paul's SUV as I became squished in between Caleb and Barrett. Caleb's hand was dangerously low on my backside but I didn't mind.

As we got closer to my house I was amazed at the cars that were parked along my street and the noise that radiated from the music. There was definitely a party going on.

"Damn Davis, your friend sure knows how to throw a party." Paul hollered over his shoulder.

I smirked. This was all Rachel's doing.

"Yes, that's Rachel for you." I said as I rolled my eyes.

Paul jumped a curb and parked on a dirt pile across the street from my house. We all climbed out and I had to admit I was a little afraid at what the inside of this house contained. I only hoped that one of my dear friends locked my room so no one could enter.

"Okay don't judge me for what may be going on behind this door." I said and everyone became curious.

I opened the door and I was shocked at what I saw. There was nobody inside which meant everyone was outside which scared me even more. We all walked towards the back door and when I opened it. My mouth nearly dropped. Half the Charlotte Bobcats were running around half naked dancing, flirting, and grinding half naked girls. Rachel and Clay were pretty much having sex on the basketball court as they swayed to the music. Nathan was dancing by himself to the music as Lucas chased Haley around the pool. Then there was a floating beer pong table in the pool and people playing. Surprisingly it was working for them. Floatation devices were everywhere, one of them was an oversized penis.

I turned towards the guys behind me.

"Um get naked!" I said with a large grin.

I rushed upstairs and changed into a bathing suit. I headed back downstairs and heard some rummaging in the kitchen. Someone was in the fridge and when they pulled back it was Lucas with a bag of limes dangling from his mouth, a bottle of tequila in one hand and sour mix in another. Our eyes met and I smirked at him and walked away.

"Hep pwease." He said through his teeth gripping the bag tightly.

I stopped, walked over and gently grabbed the bag from his mouth and he followed me out. Once we were outside Clay tackled me to the pool and I was soaked. I resurfaced for air and we started a water fight. I saw Lucas pouring Caleb and his friends drinks and I began to calm down a little.

Everything was going great. We were all drinking and having a good time. I was beginning to get very, very drunk. Nathan and I played a game of beer pong against Caleb and Rachel. Clay and Lucas clumsily played around with some of the guys from the team a little bit of basketball. Nathan and I won our game and he was rewarded with sloppy kisses from Haley. Rachel pouted and high-fived Caleb and Caleb swam lazily towards me. I smiled against the rim of my cup as he got closer.

"What the hell is going on here?"

We all looked towards the back door and there were two very good looking females and one good looking male.

"Someone called in a complaint and said that you aren't making enough noise!" The male cop yelled and the three of them started ripping their clothes off.

Rachel squealed and everyone got excited. We all began to dance and have a good time.

Caleb was beside me again and I smiled wider against my cup.

"You having fun beach boy?" I asked him as I could feel his breath along my neck.

"Hmmm mmm." He nodded.

He was just as drunk as I was and my breath got caught in my throat.

"Oh yeah?" I questioned and he was getting closer to my mouth.

I could feel a particular set of eyes staring at me but I didn't care because the next thing I knew Caleb's lips were on mine and I felt…

* * *

><p><strong>DUN DUN DUN...cliffhanger BIG TIME! <strong>

**Thoughts? So this is going to end up being one wild party as an unexpected guest shows up and some shit goes down! Any guesses of what's to come? Stay tuned guys as I fill in some more true events from my life! :s that's either good or bad lol! xoxo  
><strong>


	8. Last Night

**A/N: So I have been listening to a lot of Lana Del Rey lately, my new favorite girl crush and I have also got lost and bewitched into the world of Christian Grey (kudos to all who know of whom I speak) so my writing may be reflected by these two individuals! Also I mentioned that this was going to be a shorter story compared to my other two...so we dive straight in with this one and some of these events are true but may not be portrayed exactly as I have mentioned them in this chapter ;) I am giving too much of my personal life away but just wanted to let you all understand Brooke's actions and emotions are a reflection of me and Lucas's actions and emotions are a reflection of my ex!  
><strong>

**SO ENJOY AND THANK YOU FOR THE LOVELY REVIEWS!  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 8: Last Night<br>**

**"And we took too many shots**  
><strong> Think we kissed but I forgot<strong>

**We went streaking in the park**  
><strong> Skinny dipping in the dark"<strong>  
><strong> "Last Friday Night"-Katy Perry<strong>

My head was killing me. I felt like someone took a large, heavy object and beat the shit out of me. My eyes finally opened and I noticed that I was not in my bedroom. To be exact, I was not in a room at all. I was outside and I was surrounded by bodies. My legs were tangled with someone else's and my head was lying against someone else's chest.

_Oh shit!_

I looked at the legs I was tangled up in and they belonged to Haley. I looked at the person's chest I was laying against and it was Nathan. I let out a sigh of relief and when I sat up I noticed other bodies passed out on the concrete and lawn chairs. Haley was holding a naked Lucas tightly. My eyes went wide.

_What the fuck happened last night?_

I heard Lucas groan. He opened his eyes and as they adjusted to the bright light of the morning sun and he realized that a passed out Haley in a skimpy bikini held onto Lucas tightly…surely she thinks its Nathan as she begins to slowly grind into Lucas's naked body.

"Uh." Lucas groaned but not in pleasure…

I rolled my eyes and reached for Haley. She grunted and I placed her in Nathan's arms. When I looked back at Lucas, yes, he was definitely naked. He looked up at me and smirked.

"You like what you see mi lady?"

At the mention of _mi lady_, I got a flash of last night.

_I was topless tossing a ping pong ball into a cup and I made my shot!_

"_Hell yes! Suck on that, Scott! Take it off!" I screamed as Lucas took off his bathing suit. _

_In all his glory, Lucas Scott was naked in front of me and all the other guests who were just as drunk as I was. _

"_Are you happy mi lady? You have managed to get me naked just as you wanted."_

I realized I was wearing his t-shirt and I was definitely naked underneath it. _Oh shit. _I was completely…naked.

"What the hell happened last night?" I whispered to him.

_Fuck, where the hell is Caleb?_

His brow furrowed into a frown and he shook his head.

"You tell me." He ran his hand over his face and got up.

His amazing ass was in my eye sight and I really wanted to reach out and bite it. Hard.

"Put some clothes on." I scoffed and got up myself and made sure the shirt covered me completely.

Several of the basketball players were half naked as well strewn about the lawn. When I walked back inside, Clay and Rachel were wrapped up in themselves on the couch in the sixty-nine position. Rachel was snoring in Clay's crotch as Clay had his arms wrapped tightly around Rachel's thighs as her calves were hugging Clay's neck. _Oh this is too perfect_.

I found my phone where I knew I left it and took a picture. _Blackmail._ As I started for the kitchen, I noticed something…or should I say someone. As I neared the sleeping body, I saw the familiar head of wild blonde hair and she wasn't sleeping alone.

_WHAT THE FUCK!_

She was tangled around Caleb…

_What the fuck happened last night? Where the fuck did she come from?_

Then as I looked through my phone, I saw that Peyton called me last night around midnight. Then it slowly started coming back to me.

"_Hello? Peyton, holy shit! Hey girlie, what? No, look I am really drunk right now! Wait, what? You're in Durham…holy fuck…come over we're having a party! It's pretty wild…just get your skanky, skinny, blonde ass over here and then we can talk." _

"Fuck!" I whispered to myself.

I know that Peyton and I have improved on our friendship since what happened between her and Lucas, but things were still strained. I studied the two bodies tangled up in each other and then I remembered what happened.

_"You having fun beach boy?" I asked him as I could feel his breath along my neck._

_"Hmmm mmm." He nodded._

_He was just as drunk as I was and my breath got caught in my throat._

_"Oh yeah?" I questioned and he was getting closer to my mouth._

_I could feel a particular set of eyes staring at me but I didn't care because the next thing I knew Caleb's lips were on mine and I felt…_

_There was absolutely no spark at all…as his tongue asked permission to enter my mouth, I nearly cringed…it was like I was kissing Nathan, hell even Clay, weird, disturbing and completely wrong. _

_When he pulled back, it was like he felt it too._

"_Well that was probably the worst kiss ever." He said and I couldn't help but laugh wildly._

"_You don't have to tell me. Look you are a great guy, let's just be friends." I smiled to him and I pulled him into a hug._

_I happened to catch out the corner of my eye, Lucas glaring at us. I'll let him believe that Caleb and I are pursuing this and not deciding to be friends._

"_Let's make this game interesting." Lucas shouts out. _

_The strippers are having fun with the basketball players and girls that had to be on the cheerleading team for the Bobcats. _

"_Oh yeah." I challenge him. _

"_Yeah, naked beer pong. Definitely heat things up around her or at least make them interesting." _

Naked beer pong ended up being a success as I got Lucas naked and I remember a little time after that, Peyton showed up.

"Oh shit."

I jumped at his sexy voice echoed behind me sending a shiver down my body. He was close, too close for my liking and we both stared at Peyton and Caleb.

"What is she doing here?" He questioned in a whisper and I pushed him back from me.

"She came to town last night and apparently I invited her over. I'm kind of surprised to not see you under her." I smirked at him and walked back to the kitchen.

"Hey, I'm not the one whose dating you…I mean you made it quite obvious last night you and Caleb were together. It seems Sawyer is back in full swing." He whispered harshly at me.

I turned to face him and threw the only thing I was able to find at him. I threw the plastic penis shaped ice tray at his head. It hit him directly in the middle of his face and I smirked at him stirring the two people on the floor. Lucas was about to retaliate but stopped once she spoke.

"What is going on?"

I looked over the counter at Peyton who sat up clutching her head. When she noticed Caleb next to her, she hurried away from him bumping into Lucas and she quickly ran away from him too and was next to my side.

The air became thick with tension and I was pretty sure that this was the first time Lucas and Peyton have seen each other since graduation.

"Who is that?" She pointed to Caleb who was still passed out on the floor.

Lucas grinned.

"Brooke's boyfriend." He said bitterly and stalked up the stairs. I glowered at him.

"WHAT!" She squeaked and began to apologize and I held my hand up.

"P. Sawyer, you are in the clear." I held my hand up to reassure her she was not repeating the past.

The look of relief washed over her face.

"Thank God, seriously Brooke…I…"

We haven't really talked in some time and there was still a lot that needed to be said especially with Lucas here now too.

"Look we all obviously had a very long night…let's just take the day off…recuperate. Jeez, Peyton, what the hell happened to your face?" I asked as I reached for her eye as it was turning an ugly shade of blue.

"What?" She questioned.

Caleb grabbed his head and winced in pain. Clay and Rachel noticed the position they were in and Clay was about to start something and I cleared my throat to restrain him.

"Oh sorry ladybug, I didn't realize we had company." Clay said and I rolled my eyes at him.

I looked back down at Caleb as he started looking around the room.

"Damn, did I really drink that much last night?" He said as he laid his head back down to the floor.

"I think we all did." I said to him.

Rachel and Clay finally sat up straight.

"Peyton, you have a black eye. Does anyone remember what happened last night? I only remember bits and pieces. Oh my God!" I looked at Rachel's face and she furrowed her brows.

"What?" Rachel said as she turned to Clay.

"Babe! What the hell happened to your face?"

As I looked between Peyton and Rachel and when they saw each other, it was obvious these two got into a fight last night.

"What the fuck happened last night?" Rachel demanded as she was more pissed that her face was bruised and her ego as well.

"I don't know. If it was my guess you were probably the one to start the fight!" Peyton hissed back and just as I would have imagined it last night, the two started for each other.

Clay quickly grabbed Rachel to hold her back as Caleb and I stood in front of Peyton.

"That's enough!" Lucas shouted from the top of the stairs.

He was freshly showered and irritated as he stood in the middle of the five of us.

"Rachel and Peyton fought because Peyton kissed pretty boy over here and Rachel called Peyton a slutty hussy bitchshit…something like that and we all stood back, enjoyed the show and watched! Get the hell over it!" He threw his hands up and brushed past Peyton, me, and Caleb and proceeded to make himself something to eat.

"Okay, if you don't live here, please get out!" I had had enough.

Apparently shit went down last night and Lucas was the only one who remembers it all. Between Clay, Rachel, and I, we managed to get all the people outside out of the house and proceed their own way. Nathan and Haley did not seem fazed by any of the commotion and moved their love fest to the hammock further out in the yard under the shade. I was so envious of them. Once everyone left, Caleb finally got his friends together and he and Peyton exchanged a few words and he kissed me on the cheek and left with his friends.

"I guess I should leave too."

Lucas sat at the island eating his sandwich and rolled his eyes. I glared at him and turned to Peyton.

"I'll call you later Peyton. I promise." I smiled to her and she left right after Rachel and Clay did.

I was standing behind Lucas after I saw Peyton out the door and the one burning question that was eating away at me was _did something happen between us?_ Of course, I refuse to ask that question and give him the satisfaction of enjoying a moment between us that should have never happened to begin with IF it did.

I decided to keep my mouth shut and carry on with my day as well ignoring him. I reached for deli meats and cheese to prepare myself a sandwich. My back was to him and I could feel him watching me.

"Aren't you going to ask?" He said amusingly.

"Ask what exactly?" I said relaxed.

I looked up at him and saw him tense.

"I guess nothing." He finished his chips and walked around the island towards the trashcan.

His body brushed against mine because of the close proximity and another flash crossed my mind.

_I was panting. I was naked from the waist up and panting. I have wanted this for too long and I was getting it behind our pool shed with several strangers on the other side. It was a thrill that I've missed for so long and he was the only one who gave it to me._

"_Fuck, you taste so good." His tongue caressed my bottom lip and I reached for his bare ass._

I jumped immediately as my eyes nearly popped out of my head, but I made sure he didn't notice my reaction.

"It's nice to know some things will never change." He muttered under his breath as he pounded back up the stairs.

I was about to speak when the phone rang. The only reason we had a land line was in case of emergencies. Who the hell could be calling at nine in the morning? I read the caller ID and it said _Grace Memorial_. That was the hospital.

"Hello?"

"_Hi, this is Doctor Jansen, I need to speak with Lucas Scott. We tried reaching his primary number, but there was no answer."_

My heart leapt in my throat and I almost felt I was going to choke on it.

"Yes, one moment please." I placed the phone over my chest and proceeded up the stairs and knocked on his door.

He opened it with force and a small breeze slapped me in the face. My mouth was dropped slightly and he frowned at me.

"What?" He asked.

I shakily held the phone out to him.

"There's a Doctor Jansen on the phone for you." I said quietly and when I mentioned the doctor's name, his face went pale and he quickly grabbed the phone from me and slammed the door in my face.

I was appalled at his behavior. How dare he slam the door in my face? I have had enough of his childish antics. He locked the door and I smirked.

_Oh yeah!_

I walked through my bedroom and walked through our adjoining bathroom but stopped once I heard him speak.

"No I understand. Yes, I'll be there this afternoon. Dr. Jansen, I appreciate everything you are doing for me, but please don't ever call this number again."

I pushed the door opened and glared at him.

"How dare you Lucas Scott slam a door in my face? I have had enough of your bull shit! You have no right to treat me this way! You arrogant prick!" I really wanted to know what the hell was going on but the moment I saw his face and the dark glint of anger, it only upset me so I decided to lash out at him as opposed to express my concern for him.

"Look go run off to Caleb, I am sure he can lick your wounds and make you feel better!" He tossed the phone onto his bed and turned his back on me.

Like a bull as I saw red, I charged at him. I jumped on his back, wrapped my legs around his waist, and tightened my arms around his neck. I wanted to strangle him, it's what he deserved! He reached his hands to my arms and tried prying me free, but I was like a death trap, nothing was going to set me free.

"Damn it, Brooke!" He hollered and I brought my mouth to his ear.

"Apologize, you bastard!"

He hissed and did the only thing he thought could help him in this situation. He dropped us to his bed, his body crushing mine but I wasn't going to budge.

"Brooke!" He scolded and managed to turn in my arms and he was face to face with me.

Everything became primal in that moment as I freed one of my arms around his neck, grabbed his chin digging my nails into his skin and slammed my lips onto his. As I opened my mouth, his tongue forced its way inside. Everything became animalistic between us. My body was craving, devouring, needing him and his body was aching, pining, begging for mine.

Forgetting that I was completely naked under his tee, he slinked one of his hands under the shirt and managed to slip not one, not two, but _THREE FUCKING FINGERS_ inside of me. I screamed in pain and pleasure. His fingers began to move with a force unlike any other. I moaned in ecstasy, he was the only person who gave me this kind of feeling and I hated him for it. He didn't deserve me, I am not supposed to be in love with someone like him, but it's what my heart, body, and mind wants: him.

As his fingers continued their assault on my lower region and his mouth took control over mine I remembered almost everything from last night.

"_Pretty girl, you ready to get naked?" He winked at me with those devilishly blue eyes._

"_Aren't **you** ready to get naked?" I challenged him and he licked his lips._

_I teamed with Clay and Rachel teamed with Lucas._

"_This just doesn't seem fair. I think it should be boys against girls." Clay said wickedly._

"_You do realize that if Rach and I team up, you're going to lose." I said._

"_I don't think so." Lucas said so sure of himself._

"_Get your sexy ass over here, Gatina." I cooed at her and Rachel glided in the waist high water._

"_You boys are going down." _

_The game got heated. It almost didn't make any sense really; we were all in bathing suits and not much clothing to remove. So the point was since us girl had two pieces of clothing, as we got down to the last few cups, Rachel and I were to remove our tops. Well we had three cups left and I took the plunge and removed my top first. Lucas' eyes nearly popped out of his head and Rachel scolded Clay for staring._

_Always remember folks, you can't go up against Rachel and me together and expect to win. Clay and Lucas got naked and went streaking down the street. It was glorious and exhilarating. We continued to drink and I finally started to look for my bathing suit top._

_As I was searching for it, I realized that it must have gotten lost along the way and that's when a naked Lucas grabbed me and pulled me behind the pool shed._

"_What are you doing?" I chuckled and he became serious._

"_I miss you." He said as he brushed the hair from my face._

"_Lucas, no, we can't, I'm—" Before I could say anything else, he cut me off with a kiss._

_His lips were intoxicating and his hands roamed my body. My hands found his bare ass and squeezed it bringing him closer to me. His hands left my face and moved to my breasts, oh him and those hands. He removed my bathing suit bottoms and I flushed. We were attempting to have sex behind the pool shed with thirty other people on the other side. It was exciting and mind-blowing. _

_We stopped once we heard the commotion. We pulled back and Lucas growled. He found his shirt and handed it to me. Lucas never cared to walk around naked so we proceeded around the shed and saw Peyton and Rachel going at it. When the fuck did she get here? Jeez, has she been here this whole time?_

"_You fucking hussy!" Rachel pulled at Peyton's hair._

"_Damn it Rachel!" Peyton punched Rachel in the face and everyone gasped. _

_I went after them but Lucas stopped me._

"_We don't want your pretty face getting in the middle of that." He whispered along my ear. Everything hit my center and I became completely wet._

"_You fucking bitchshit fucker!" Rachel charged Peyton into the pool._

_Everyone started cheering for the other._

_I noticed that Nathan and Haley were in their own little world, of course like always._

I wasn't quite sure how the night ended with me being sandwiched in between Nathan and Haley or what may or may not have happened between Peyton and Caleb, but none of that seemed to matter as Lucas's mouth found its way to my wet, needy center.

"Fucking shit!" I breathed out harshly.

His forceful hands gripped my hips.

"Stay still!" He commanded and I sucked my bottom lip in between my teeth to concentrate on holding still for him.

His tongue assaulted my pussy as wet as it was and my eyes rolled into the back of my head. I buried my fingers into his hair and forced him to dive deeper into me. What the hell was I doing? What the hell were _we _doing? I somehow managed to control myself and I pushed him off of me. He growled at me like a wild animal pissed that another took his meal away. He was a predator and I was his prey.

I reached for the shorts that were on the ground and quickly pulled them on.

"Damn it, Lucas." I said flushed trying to regain myself.

"You started it!" He hissed back at me caressing his chin that was bleeding from my nails earlier.

"If I remember correctly, sir, you started it last night!" I hissed back.

We stood in front of each other glaring at one another. Then the phone call from the doctor came back to me and I became concerned.

"Damn it, Lucas, why is the hospital calling you? You better tell me now because it's easy to do a Google search on Dr. Jansen." I crossed my arms over my chest and his eyes softened and from one moment being a predator, he turned into a helpless creature.

He sat on the bed and held his hand to me. I wasn't sure what he was going to do.

"Don't try anything with me." I said. I can't have him distracting me from what I needed to know.

"Do you want to know or what?" He questioned me with his hand still out waiting for mine.

"Get your ass over here."

I placed my hand in his and he gently pulled me to him.

"You were never supposed to know until I knew for sure what was going to happen." His voice was small and quiet.

"Lucas you're scaring me."

He looked up at me and I saw the innocent boy I knew years ago.

"You know I have HCM…"

"Yes." I held my breath.

"I have a really bad heart, Brooke." He began stroking his fingers along my knuckles.

"Luke?" I said trying to hold back the tears.

"I need a heart transplant."

At first I wasn't sure I heard him right or if I heard him speak at all. I looked into his eyes.

"What?" I questioned again.

He dropped my hand and got up from the bed. He ran his hands through his hair and held his back to me as he spoke again.

"They have given me about six months, Brooke, unless I get a heart transplant."

I felt like I was going to throw up. It all made sense now. His attitude, well that was never going to change, but him trying, wanting to be a better person, a better man, and all the cryptic talk between him and Lana. She knew? How could _she_ have known? Nathan knows too! That son of a bitch has known all along and didn't tell me. I wonder if Haley knows.

He turned to face me and I didn't realize that tears were running down my face.

"Brooke, I—"

I slapped him across the face and brought the hand I just hit him with to my mouth.

_Shit!_

I ran out of the room and down the stairs. Nathan and Haley were inside now and cleaning up the mess. When they saw me they stopped what they were doing.

"Brooke, honey, what's wrong?" Haley asked me.

"How long have you known?" I demanded of both of them.

Nathan's face fell and Haley looked between us confused.

"What is going on? Brooke what are you talking about?" Haley was becoming scared as I let the tears run freely down my face.

"He told you." Nathan said relieved and frightened.

"Yeah only because he got caught! You son of a bitch! You should have told me!"

"What the hell is going on?" Haley cut in becoming afraid as well.

"Tell her Nate!" I couldn't be here.

I grabbed my keys and even in Lucas's clothes, I got into my car and drove away. I couldn't even say it out loud. Lucas…was dying? No, no this is not happening.

I kept driving and found myself pulling into the beach. I walked out to the sand and lucky for me it was mostly deserted on this cloudy Saturday morning. I sat down close to the waves and closed my eyes. I stretched my legs out and let the small tide glide along my naked calves. Even though I have been so angry at him, so hurt and emotionally abused by him, I can't bear this to happen.

"Lucas…is dying." I brought my head to my hands and started crying.

He has to get a heart transplant. He has too because I lost him once and I can't lose him again.

* * *

><p><strong>I am so evil but we're making progress with Lucas! Up next: I am not sure yet going to surprise myself as well! Review away my loves!<strong>


	9. Doctor's Visit

**So I have recently discovered that I can check to see how many people are actually reading my story and I have to say I am amazed! Thank you all for taking the time to stop by and read my work! It would be something to hear from you all, I could only imagine! But thank you indeed for reading and checking in on my story! :)  
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**Enjoy!  
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><p><strong>I will love you till the end of time<strong>

**I would wait a million years**

**Promise you'll remember that you're mine**

**Baby can you see through the tears?**

"**Blue Jeans" –Lana Del Rey**

I took a deep breath and I was about to tell her the one thing I hoped I would never have to…

"They have given me about six months, Brooke, unless I get a heart transplant." With my back to her, I was almost afraid at what she might say or do. I turned to face her and tears started to fall down her face. It immediately broke my already shattered heart.

"Brooke, I—"

Then her hand came hard across my cheek. I raised my hand to my face and she brought her hand to her mouth. She gasped and bolted out of the room. I was going to chase her but I sunk to the floor in front of my bed.

Not even a few moments later I heard shouting between Nathan and Haley and I knew that she finally found out the truth herself.

"_Nathan, don't talk to me right now!" _

I heard her tiny feet pounding up the stairs and I closed my eyes and waited for the wrath of Haley James.

I heard her feet stop in front of me and I couldn't hold it in any longer. I can't remember the last time I cried, but I let my own tears fall down my face. I began to shake as when you say it out loud to the people who mean the most to you in the world, it makes it all real and scary and to know that you may never see these people again.

"Oh Lucas."

With my eyes still shut, I felt her slink down next to me and pull me into her arms.

"I am so sorry, Haley. I should have told you, I just didn't want to scare anybody."

She began to brush her fingers through my hair and draw soothing circles along my back.

"She hates me." I said as I remember the look on her face when she slapped me.

I have done everything wrong by her and I wanted so desperately to fix _us _before learning if I had a fighting chance at getting a heart. Heart transplants are the hardest to come by, it seems there are more people out there in the world who need them and less who are able to provide them.

"She doesn't hate you; she's devastated that she may lose you, just…just like me. Damn it, Lucas Eugene Scott! Why didn't you tell us? Tell me?" I could tell she was crying and I finally opened my eyes to see her look so fragile and heart wrenched that I pulled her into my arms.

"I just didn't want to scare anybody and I…I really didn't want any of you treating me differently. Hales, come on, you know I don't do sappy love and hugs. It's not my thing." I tried to make light of this with her, but my concern still remained with Brooke and how she just left.

"She doesn't hate you, Luke." Haley pulled back from my chest and looked up at me.

"She's devastated because even though she is so stubborn she is still madly in love with you. I don't think her heart could go through losing you again."

I flinched at her words and took in a deep breath.

"Don't be mad at Nate, Hales, I begged him not to say anything to anyone. Believe me he hated keeping it from you all, but I made him not say a word." I kissed the top of her head and she pulled back.

"I know…I am mad at you!" She pulled out of my arms and swatted me on the back of my head.

"You stubborn ass hole! You just should have said something! Things...yes they would be different but come on, it's _us_. The four musketeers! We would have tried to make the best of this."

I knew what she meant. Our bucket lists. I laughed to myself. I remember those days sitting on the roof of my mom's café and making goals, plans, and things we wanted to do before we die.

My mom…

"I haven't told my mom yet. I don't…I don't think I can bare it. It was already nerve wracking telling Brooke…I don't know if I can face her too." I finally got myself under control.

My body wasn't shaking as bad and my tears definitely stopped flowing. Haley rested her head on my shoulder and took my hand.

"Your mom will not hate you, she may be mad that you didn't tell her about it but none of us hate you for it. Lucas you are an arrogant ass who can't listen to his own heart, but this world would not be the same without you in it."

"Hales, this heart is flawed, it's probably wrong." I chuckled and she didn't find it funny. It really wasn't because I knew that everything in my heart was real and true.

"I have an appointment today. The doctor just wants to see how I'm doing, give me an update. Would you come with me?" I looked over at her and she nodded.

"Of course."

"I have to find Brooke first."

* * *

><p>I wasn't sure anymore if I was crying because of Lucas or because the wind picked up and it burned my eyes. I wrapped my arms tighter around my knees burying my head into my legs. The clouds still hid the sun but the temperature in the weather was still nice. At this point I wasn't sure how long I had been out here. I watched a crab surface from the water and crawl across the sand and out of my eye sight. I saw a couple play fetch with their dog. Then I saw something made me cry because it made me sad.<p>

A husband and wife carrying their infant were showing her just how beautiful the beach can be. They had gotten closer to me and I could see the precious baby's eyes be bewildered by her surroundings. Then it brought me back to Lucas and how Lana decided not to have his baby and then that he only had six months to live unless he was able to get a new, flawless heart.

I shuddered and buried my head further into my legs. I felt someone close to me and then they were sitting next to me. I knew it was someone I knew, but I wasn't sure who it was as I kept my face hidden.

"What ya doing out here Davis?"

I didn't say anything at first and I started to cry again.

"If you're calling me Davis, then this is truly very serious." I pulled back to look into the amber eyes of one of my closest friends.

"Nate called me wondering where you might have gone to and this was about one of the few places I thought you might be. He told me what's going on. I have a right mind to kick Lucas in his mouth, but that wouldn't help anything." She wrapped her arm around me and I buried my face into her shoulder.

"I've been angry, mad, disappointed, hurt, happy, sad and thrilled because of him, but Rach if I lose him again…I don't know if I could survive without him around." I looked up at her and she grinned.

"That's what being in love truly is my dear. I mean I know that you've been torturing him the past few weeks, which now with a bad heart may not be the wisest thing, but since he's been back, it shouldn't change anything but you have to give him credit!"

I pulled out of her arms and I didn't understand what she was trying to say.

"Are you saying that I should just throw myself at him completely because there's a possibility he's dying?" I was appalled that she would even consider that.

"No slut! I am saying that it's obvious he's been trying with you and he was trying to do it without your pity or obligation to be with him. Brookie, he was trying to get you back by just being Luke, I mean come on!" She threw her hands up in the air and looked at me like I was an idiot.

It was true. Lucas was trying to start over with me by being his self, not by telling me that he may only have six months to live and that I should be with him because of it. I took in a deep breath and started to cry again.

"Brooke."

It was so strange to hear Rachel actually call me by my name so many times in one conversation, it just made the topic so much more serious and it is!

"I slapped him." I said as I looked over at her.

"Well you reacted. It's normal. He probably knows that. He was wrong in not telling you, but right because he didn't want your pity, he wanted your heart."

I titled my head to the side to get a better look at my friend. This was so unlike her, but everything she was saying was leaking with truth. I did have to give credit to Lucas for trying to do this because he wanted too, because he wanted it to be real and honest, not to have a crutch to help him.

"I just…I don't know what to do. I can't just go jumping into his arms and say yes, I want to be with you, but it's exactly what I want to do."

She let out a sigh as did I.

"I mean you do still have time to get there, Brooke. He _may_ not get a heart transplant and then there's a big hell yeah he'll get it. There is time and if I know Lucas the way I do, that man is not going to go down a pussy. He's going to fight until he can't fight anymore and if he knows that you are there for him, well I say he'll last longer than six months."

I started crying again as every emotion possible was bursting through me. Of course, I want Lucas, I don't think I've ever stopped but bad heart or not, it doesn't change anything although it could. I wrapped my arms around my legs once more.

"Nathan told me that Lucas has an appointment today and I really think you should go with him. I am sure he would want you there."

I look over at Rachel and just realized that she looks like shit. She had a rough time last night and she was still willing to come find me and sit on the beach in the sun that now wanted to shine.

"I love you bitch." I said.

"I love you slut."

I pulled her into my arms and she giggled.

"Come on, my hangover has decided to stick around and I want a chili cheese dog."

I laughed at her as my tears were now crossed between joy and sadness. I drove back to my house as Rachel met up with Clay. I parked outside and my palms became sweaty. I was so nervous because I wasn't sure what I was going to do or say when I saw Lucas again. I took in a deep breath.

"Just breathe." I said to myself and got out of the car.

I slowly walked inside to find Haley and Nathan sitting on the couch together and Lucas staring intently out the window in the armchair. When my presence was noticed all eyes turned towards me. Lucas stared at me. He was anxious, frightened, and most of all scared. For the first time I was seeing him be _real_. Not the bad boy 'I just brush it off' this was scary for him and he was opening up about it.

"Can we talk?" I asked him.

He nodded and motioned towards the stairs. He started walking and I stopped and turned towards Nathan.

"I'm sorry." I whispered to him.

"It's okay." He said reaching for my hand and giving it a gentle squeeze.

I smiled at him and followed Lucas up the stairs. We both weren't sure whose room to go into so he proceeded into his. I walked in behind him and shut the door. We stood awkwardly in front of each other and it was almost like two hopeless, innocent teenagers waiting for the other to make the first move. When we made eye contact, I couldn't help the tears that welled in my eyes.

"Oh God, Brooke, please don't cry." He reached out to me and I stopped him.

"It's not that I don't want you to touch me. It's just that if you do I may cry harder and I've done enough of that already today."

He flinched and I hated that he looked so hurt.

"I'm sorry." He said quietly and I almost didn't recognize this Lucas standing before me.

He seemed so innocent, shy and reclusive and then I remembered when I left earlier I slapped him surprising both of us.

"I had no right to hit you. I am sorry." I said quietly trying to control my tears.

"No, you did. I should have told you. I just didn't want this." He pointed at the tears on my face and refused to listen to me when I told him not to touch me.

"I didn't want to see you crying for me. None of you to cry. I don't do well with this and for fuck's sake I am freaking out just a little bit now! I mean I thought I was okay in the beginning but now that everyone knows, it just scares the hell out of me." He releases his hands from my face and I immediately miss his touch.

"It's the HCM, isn't it?" I asked him.

He nodded and shoved his hands in his pockets.

"I am guessing you found out before you came here?" I asked and he nodded again.

"I passed out in one of my classes and Lana was there. She came with me in the ambulance to the hospital since I had no next of kin nearby. They ran tests and concluded that my heart was pretty much running low on battery." He got quiet near the end of his statement.

I scowled. He noticed.

"Why are you scowling, pretty girl?"

I was jealous! I was crazy jealous knowing that some stranger, well a stranger to me was there for him in one of his most vulnerable moments.

"I am jealous of her." I said and looked up at him.

He became confused.

"Of Lana? Why?"

"She was there for you, with you when this happened. I would give anything to be there for you, to console you, take care of you. Lucas, it's what I've always done, it's what I always want to do."

He shook his head in confusion again and I smirked.

"You just don't get it, do you?" I said now getting a little agitated.

"Lucas, I love you. I've always loved you and I always wanted to be that person for you to always come to. Finally getting a chance to be with you back in high school was a dream come true. I finally got what I wanted but you just didn't want it. You weren't ready for it and I feel that you still aren't. I hate that this is happening to you, you have no idea, but I don't think it should change anything or make me say, yes, Lucas, I want to be with you, I want to love you until your dying day." I started crying again thinking about it.

I said those words to him again, those three little words…that I haven't said to him in four years. This was real. This was more real than anything and the more we talk about it, the more anguished I get.

"I know and that's why I didn't tell you."

I nodded because I know that.

"You can't die, Luke." I began to sob uncontrollably now.

He pulled me into his arms and held me tightly. I buried my face into his chest wrapping my arms around him because I was afraid that he may disappear. He brushed his fingers through my hair and he kissed my temple. I closed my eyes and breathed in his scent. Lucas always smelled like Old Spice and lemon. I never knew where the hint of lemon came from but it made him smell wonderful, it made him smell like _Lucas_!

"Brooke, I'm not going anywhere." It was like he knew I was savoring the moment as if it were my last.

I pulled back and reached up and gently kissed him.

"I should have told you I just didn't want to worry anybody until I knew something for sure, but I found out the six months part when I moved here. I heard Dr. Jansen was one of the best."

We both took a deep breath and when I looked down I saw that I was still dressed in his clothes.

"I heard you had an appointment today. Do you mind if I tagged along?"

He let out the breath he was holding and smiled.

"I would love for you to be there with me."

I still had my arms loosely around his waist and I began to feel him shake.

"Lucas, I am going to be there for everything, I promise." I squeezed my arms around him and rubbed my hands against his back.

"Brooke, you have to understand that I want us to try again but I just…I am trying really hard, learning to do the right thing by you and I, you know I care…I—"

"I know you give a rat's ass." I chuckled and he blushed.

"Let's just see what happens today and let's just work on trying to be friends…like we used to, we can not be having random make-out sessions or you know." I said trying to be cool about all of this.

His hand started to caress the small of back under his shirt I was wearing. All the heat he was generating by his touch on my back started to radiate to my sex.

"Lucas, we can't do this." My breathing became rigid and he drew in closer to me.

"Brooke…" His lips brushed against mine and I became lost in him.

His hand rose higher up my back between my shoulder blades bringing me closer to him. My arms automatically went around his neck and I clasped my fingers tightly in his short hair.

Our tongues battled for dominance like always but this time, it felt different. He was being tender, soft, and affectionate. Was it possible that Lucas was showing me how he really _felt_?

He pulled away from me and rested his forehead against mine.

"If we just forget for a moment about my heart condition, do you think there is any possible way for you to let me back in here?" He let his other hand slide from my neck, between my breasts, and to my heart.

I looked up at him and tears dared to leave my eyes.

"We'll see, Luke."

* * *

><p>The four of us get into Nathan's Jeep and we begin our trip to the hospital. Brooke sat in the backseat with me and I stared out the window. It was finally happening. The truth was out and now everyone was a part of it. It made me extremely nervous. The first few times I came to Dr. Jansen, I wasn't nervous and it didn't really bother me, but now…I was freaking out. I started bouncing my leg and I rested my chin on my propped up elbow resting on the car door. I jumped as I felt her tiny hand rest on my knee. I looked down at her hand on my knee and turned to her. She was looking out her window and I couldn't help but let a small smile appear. I rested my hand on top of hers and she gripped her fingers around my hand and gave it a small squeeze. I saw her smile and I looked back out the window.<p>

We got to the hospital and went to the west wing where I would meet with my doctor. Nathan, Haley, and Brooke looked at me with somber eyes. This was one of the reasons why I didn't want anyone knowing yet. We reached the nurse's station and I walked up to the counter alone.

"Hi, Mrs. Beckie, appointment for Lucas Scott." I said as I cleared my throat.

"Good to see you again, Mr. Scott, Dr. Jansen is running late with an appointment, but I'll come and get you immediately once he's done."

I nodded and went to sit in between Brooke and Haley. I started bouncing my knee again and this time Haley placed her hand on my knee.

"Luke it's okay." She whispered.

"Stop looking at me like I'm dying."

The three of them looked at me like I was stupid and I rolled my eyes.

"Okay, yes, I realize that it may happen, but damn it, stop looking at me like that!" I raised my voice and people started glaring at me.

"You know I was thinking."

We all turned towards Nathan who let out a long sigh and was lost deep in thought.

"Fuck this shit!"

Haley gasped, Brooke giggled, and I was intrigued.

"Oh yeah?" I sniggered.

"We have spring break coming up in a couple of weeks. We're going to pack our bags and we're going on vacation. A two weeks vacation, we all can afford to miss a week of classes."

I laughed.

"Fuck yeah." I said and reached over behind Haley and lightly smacked him on the back.

The two girls just gawked at us and then bust out in their own fit of giggles.

"Oh yeah Captain and where are we going?" Haley asked Nathan and he grinned.

"Well between Lucas and myself I am sure we can pay for the whole trip easily with Dan's money. I was thinking we could go somewhere exotic, does anybody have any specific place in mind?" Nathan grinned from ear to ear.

"St. John." Brooke spoke up quickly.

We all turned to face her and her face became one of reminiscence.

"Where?" I asked her.

"Well with absent parents you don't have many memories, but when I was younger, before things got strained between them, we would always take an annual trip to the Virgin Islands and St. John was my favorite. We should go there; it's beautiful, fun, and peaceful."

I couldn't help the large smile on my face and I was about to speak when the nurse called my name. We all started shuffling to stand and she held her hand up.

"I'm sorry, it's great that you have huge support unit with you, most patients don't have that, but you are only allowed one person with you to come in." She said kindly.

I looked between the most important people in my life.

"Brooke." I reached my hand out to her and her mouth dropped.

It made sense that I should ask my brother, or even Haley but I wanted Brooke to be there with me every step of the way, just like she promised. I looked over at Nathan and Haley and they both smiled and nodded. They understood.

"What? Luke, no you should take Nate or Hales…"

"Brooke! Come on now." I instructed and she placed her small hand in mine and I led her through the white door and we followed the nurse down the white corridor.

Hospitals only bring fear, pain, and anxiety to me. There were no comforting colors, smells, or scenery. It was all white, cold, and sterile.

"Okay Mr. Scott. How have you been feeling since your last visit?" She asked as she held a clipboard and grabbed her pen that was in her hair.

Brooke and I sat next to each other in the small room.

"Fine. I've actually had no episodes or anything; the medication has been working very well." I said and clasped my hands together and took in a deep breath.

"Mr. Scott, relax, stress doesn't do you any good at times like these." She smiled and winked at me.

She reminded me of my mom, I would have to go see her this weekend and tell her everything. I really missed her. Even though my attitude was slightly bad back then, my mom was the one person I would always give my most respect to and I tried to never to disappoint her. It's a miracle I turned out the way I did.

"Yes mam." I said and released my breath.

"And who's your friend? We haven't seen you with anybody here before." She smiled at me and looked over at Brooke.

Brooke blushed.

"This is one of my closest friends and someone who means a great deal to me." I took her hand in mine and Brooke was surprised.

"I'm Brooke. Brooke Davis." She held her hand out to Beckie and she smiled…I blushed this time.

"Oh so _this_ is Brooke. She's more beautiful than you described."

"Okay Mrs. Beckie, anymore questions?" I became completely flustered as the older woman was putting me on the spot.

Brooke giggled and my face was all shades of red.

"Not at the moment, Mr. Scott."

"Lucas, please." I said to her always repeating myself.

"Lucas, he'll be in shortly. Please remember no stress!" She said sternly.

"It was nice to finally put a gorgeous face to the pretty name." She smiled at Brooke and Brooke waved goodbye to her.

We were left alone and I became so nervous I felt that my heart was going to burst from my chest. No other woman, girl had this affect on me and it was always so hard to show Brooke that unless we were having sex. That's how I expressed myself was through sex, it was all I've ever known but with Brooke I wanted it to be more, to show her and tell her in every way possible that she was the one and only.

"So you've talked about me to the nurse? Lucas you surprise me every day, maybe you really are changing."

I looked over at her and she was glowing. I went to speak but the door opened again. In walked Dr. Jansen and I immediately shut my mouth. This man always intimidated me because he reminded me of Dan. I sat upright and he shut the door behind him before pasting a huge pearly white grin on his face.

"Lucas you look well." He held his hand out to me and I shook it.

"Beckie told me that Brooke was here. Lucas, she's more beautiful than you lead on." Dr. Jansen held his hand out to Brooke and she was blushing again.

"It's nice to meet you." She said and that pearly smile was still glued to his face.

"So Lucas, I know it's only been about a week since your last visit, but how have things been. How are you?" He sat in his stool in front of Brooke and me and crossed his arms.

Dr. Jansen almost seemed like a therapist in some ways but I guess that's one of the main reasons he's brilliant at his job.

"Honestly a little stressful." I felt Brooke flinch beside me and I reassured her that it wasn't all because of her and I held her hand tightly and comforting in my own.

"I've just been dealing with some personal issues and I believe I have taken care of them."

"Are you referring to the Lana situation?"

I nodded. I guess in some ways Dr. Jansen _has_ become my therapist. Dealing with a heart patient all kinds of factors can hurt the situation or improve it and I've told him everything because honestly I don't know how else to deal with shitty situations and I will do whatever it takes to insure that I stick around for as long as I can.

"Well that's good. That is something you don't need to be worrying over. How are things with you and Brooke?"

We both flinched at his question that I felt he was pushing it a little.

"No offense, but can we please talk about something else?" Brooke finally spoke up and I actually agreed with her.

"Yes, Dr. Jansen, Brooke and I are fine and I'd really like to know what's going on with me and getting a new heart. Where am I at on the list?"

The fucking list. If there were ever a time where I cared to be on a waiting list it was now. It was important to get to the top and I was going to make it if I have to fight for it.

His face twisted into a frown and Brooke and I both tensed at his reaction.

"Bittersweet. I lost one patient and another one transferred to Seattle. So that puts you up two spots. Lucas, please try not to worry about where you are on the list. I can tell you this, the less stressed you are, the longer you can beat the six months timeline, trust me, I've seen it." He smiled again and grabbed his stethoscope and rolled his chair closer to me.

"Let's take a listen, shall we?" He placed the round object over my heart.

"Breathe normally."

I did as he asked and I couldn't read his face.

"It's a shame, you know? Your heart sounds fine, but the HCM in some cases just drains it. I am sorry but I am fighting for you, Lucas. I see a lot of myself in you." He rolled back away from me and I cringed at his words.

Because he reminds me of Dan in some ways makes his statement that much worse.

"Thank you, Dr. Jansen." I said.

"Can I ask a question?"

Dr. Jansen and I both turned towards Brooke who smiled nervously.

"Of course, Miss Davis."

This time she took in a deep breath.

"What…what if he isn't able to get a heart transplant in time…will he…will he suffer?" I could tell that she wanted to cry so I brought her hand closer to my heart and began rubbing my fingers across her knuckles.

Dr. Jansen's brow creased a moment.

"Honestly, Miss Davis, if and that's a big if, he doesn't get one in time, it just really depends on Lucas. Some patients live their last days in a state of bliss and happiness dying in a peaceful sleep or being around their loved ones. Others just give up and allow stress to put strain on their heart giving them cardiac arrest. It really boils down to Lucas and how he handles his life from now on. He's young Miss Davis and shouldn't really have anything to worry him, but Lucas is also a strong man and I think that is something that he has going for him." He smiled at Brooke and she looked over at me.

"Do you have any other questions, Miss Davis?" He asked gently and she shook her head.

"Okay well I'll have Beckie take a blood sample and then we will set you up with a beeper finally." He smiled and I remembered something.

"Oh Doc, we are planning a two weeks vacation, you know stress free, and will the beeper do fine outside of the country?"

He smiled and nodded.

"You could go to the moon, Lucas, and it will work, just if you are away, make sure you can get back quickly." He winked at both of us.

"It was nice meeting you Miss Davis, Lucas, care free and stress free." He waved and left the room.

Later on Beckie came back, drew some blood, and gave me the beeper. She told me that if the red light were to ever blink to change the batteries immediately. She gave me my paperwork for the day and Brooke and I met up with Haley and Nathan.

We drove back to the house and I could tell there was something different about Brooke. I guess talking to my doctor changed something in her. Like I told her, I don't want her pity for any reason. All I want is her and her amazing heart. Once we were back, Nathan immediately starting getting the trip organized and invited Clay and Rachel, the more that came the less it would cost us especially when he said that Clay would pitch in and help pay with his fat wallet from his basketball career. I smirked.

After Nathan got done talking to Clay, I cleared my throat to have all of their attention.

"Well now that you all know what's going on with me, I just really don't want any of you treating me different. As my doctor keeps drilling me I need to have no stress whatsoever and when you look at me with somber eyes or give me sympathetic smiles it stresses me out."

Everyone nodded and I knew it would be hard for them.

"I am also going to Tree Hill this weekend. I need to tell my mom." I said and they all nodded again.

"I think that's great, Luke. She should know." Haley said and smiled.

"I would come with you but we have a game this weekend."

"Nathan its fine. I just want it to be me and my mom. I appreciate the offer though." I smiled at my brother.

He and Haley went to their room and Brooke went into the kitchen.

"Hey Brooke."

She turned to face me and smiled.

"I know I told Nathan that I wanted to go alone, but I would really like for you to keep me company on the drive and I'm sure my mom would love to see you." I shoved my hands in my pockets.

"I would love to Luke. I have to work Friday but if you like we could leave when my shift is over." She smiled and I couldn't help the grin on my face.

"Brooke, you really aren't acting this way because of everything that has happened today, are you?" I didn't want to ask but I desperately needed to know.

She took in a deep breath and let out a sigh.

"Honestly, a part of it is, yes, but it's a reality check that I can't be mad at you forever or hold a slight grudge on you, let's just start fresh, be the kids we used to be with each other, except for you being a player. Besides I've missed our little road trips we used to take together." She winked at me and started to make herself something to eat.

This would be the first time Brooke and I would spend a whole weekend alone without ex boyfriends or potential boyfriends, or any of our other friends, it was just going to be me and Brooke and I realized I was extremely happy.

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><p><strong>Whew, okay that as a lot! So next few chapters! <strong>

**Peyton and Brooke talk...Brooke and Lucas take a road trip to Tree Hill where I will put real life events from my life in...you'll love it probably, lol.  
><strong>

**SIDE NOTE (if anyone is interested): When Brooke mentions going on her family's annual trips to the Virgin Islands, me and my family used to do that every year until I was about thirteen. My mom lost her VP job and we couldn't afford it any more...sad day, I haven't been there in 12 years, but I am going to enjoy remembering the place and describing it to you when I write those chapters of their two weeks in St. John, I can't wait!  
><strong>

**So stay tuned!  
><strong>


	10. Road Trip

**A/N: So I've decided to just not hate anymore in this story. I promised light and fun even though we have the possibility of Lucas dying going on...but you'll understand once you have read the chapter! Enjoy!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 10: Road Trip<br>**

I was in the back un-boxing the new line of clothing for the window display when my boss called out my name saying I had a visitor. I finished what I was doing and walked out front to see a familiar blonde. _Shit!_

"Hey you never called and I was afraid you didn't want to see me."

I completely forgot to call her after what happened two days ago with Lucas and I felt like a shitty person.

"Shit Peyton, I am so sorry a lot has happened in the past two days I forgot." I walked over to my boss and asked her if I could take my lunch break even though it was after two in the afternoon. She said I could have an hour since we were slow.

I grabbed my purse and Peyton and I proceeded to the nearest deli down the street.

"Is everything okay?" She asked as she shoved her hands in the oh-so familiar black leather jacket. She almost seemed like the girl I loved back in high school.

"Not really." I wasn't sure if I even wanted to talk to her about Lucas even if it was about his condition.

Peyton and I really never talked about Lucas; we both pretended that it never happened. She left for Los Angeles and I never really saw her anymore. She randomly called me about six months after graduation and it was weird it was like we talked but never once brought up what happened between her and Lucas and we would just keep in touch a little just seeing how the other was doing.

"Brooke, what's wrong?" She placed her hand on my arm and I inwardly flinched.

"There are some things going on with Lucas and I don't know how to handle them."

Once we were inside the tension immediately built up and neither one of us knew what to say.

"I'm sorry." It was like a burden lifted from her shoulders.

I turned to face her and I knew exactly what she was apologizing for. I took in a deep breath and turned my back to her as I found us a small table in the corner of the restaurant.

"Peyton, I don't…why did you do it?" I blurted out and I really didn't want to do this, not right now.

She took in a deep breath, removed her jacket, and sat down across from me.

"It was so stupid, and I shouldn't have allowed it to get so far. I was…" She took a moment and then stated with her story again, "Jake and I were having some problems. His ex was being a total bitch and he found out she had his baby. We got into an argument about it. He told me he had to leave and go see if it were true."

"That's why he disappeared?"

Jake and I were never really close, but I just assumed that when he found out about Peyton and Lucas he just bolted…like I should have.

"Yes. He transferred to another school and tried to sort things out with Nikki and now he's with her and their daughter." A tear slid down her face and I desperately wanted to console her, but I restrained myself.

"Okay where does Lucas fit into this?"

She let out a sigh and brushed the stray tears away.

"I went to the Blue Post to just forget about it, looks like he had the same idea. He was sitting at the bar alone. He looked like shit and when he noticed me, he called me over and we just started talking. He never once mentioned you and when I tried to ask him how things were going with the both of you, he shot me down. I knew something was bothering him. I knew he was having an inner struggle with something and then he just kissed me and told me he could help me forget, just like how he wanted to forget. So that's how it happened. When I saw that look on your face when you showed up I felt like the worst human being in the world."

She placed her head in her hands as I knew she was silently crying. I became infuriated and hurt all over again. The waiter who was going to take our order saw us and held his hands up saying he would come back.

"So you thought it was okay to forget about Jake and everything with your best friend's _boyfriend_?" I didn't mean to raise my voice, but I felt like that high school girl again right after the moment I walked in and saw them two fucking.

"I don't know what I was thinking, but I guess…I should tell you…" She removed her face from her hands.

"I've always had a thing for him, but I knew you were smitten and I knew he had a thing for you too, I never wanted to cross that line, but when he offered, I just…it was like I couldn't refuse him. I know that is so wrong and not an excuse but I guess my inner desire for him took over."

I was livid. I was about to speak but she cut me off.

"He told me you know? After you stormed off and you both got into that fight. He came back inside and started getting dressed and I just started screaming at him, punching him. I asked him, 'why would you do this to her? And with me of all people?' The look on his face, Brooke, I'd never seen him look like that before…so…so broken. He told me he did it because he knew you didn't deserve trash like him and then he just said it…he said that he loved you too much for him to ever hurt you."

My mouth fell open and I didn't know what to say or do.

"Well that's just it Peyton, not only did he hurt me, but my best friend did as well. Congratulations." I leaned back in my chair and crossed my arms.

I really just wanted to yell at her, scream at her, shake her until her head fell off, but that was years ago and so much has changed since then.

"I don't know if you and I can ever have that trust, that bond we used to have, but I am willing to forgive you because it happened so long ago and things are different now."

She nodded and she wiped her tears away.

"Brooke what's wrong now? I know you're upset about something besides us."

I looked over at her and she did look like my childhood best friend in this moment.

"Lucas is dying, Peyton."

She brought her hand to her mouth and reached with her other for my hand.

"Brooke, oh my God. I'm sorry, what's he—"

"He's waiting for a heart transplant…they have given him six months, but I just…I don't know. I want to put all my faith in the fact that he will get this heart and he will be okay, but that small, miniscule part of me is living in fear that if he doesn't make it, I don't know if I can survive without him."

We became a sobfest of emotion in the small deli and the staff became concerned and offered us a free meal. Peyton and I continued to talk about old times, LA, Durham, and of course, Lucas. It was odd, after talking with her, the Lucas situation with her seemed as if it didn't matter at all anymore. It was just nice talking to her about anything and everything and I got that nostalgic feeling with her again.

We both left the waiter a fat tip for his generosity, and we started back to the boutique arm in arm. We stopped in front of the store and I turned to my friend.

"P. Sawyer, I am glad you came today and I am glad that we could put things in the past where they belong. I want us to work on our friendship even though you are across the country." I sniffled and she smiled.

"Well B. Davis, I might be moving back to this side of the country. My label has been satisfied with my work that they might bump me up a position and put me on a new label they want to open in Atlanta."

I wasn't sure where the excitement came from that just exploded within me, but I squealed and pulled her into my arms.

"Peyton that's amazing. Congratulations."

We pulled back from each other with stupid grins plastered to our faces.

"Yeah, well, let's not jump the wagon just yet, I'm not for sure if it's going to happen but a little birdie told me it was a huge possibility. We should go out to celebrate tonight, on me!" She said and I smiled at her but shook my head.

"I would love it, but Lucas and I are going to Tree Hill as soon as I get off work. He's going to tell his mom what's going on and he wants me to be there."

She got this silly smile on her face and I cocked my head to the side.

"What?" I asked her.

"He's in love with you, Brooke. He was back then and it's obvious now. He's just an stubborn ass who doesn't know what love is and doesn't know how to express it. He'll get there…I promise."

Then I remembered that out of all the people to say it too, Lucas told Peyton that he was in love with me.

"He really said it to you?" I asked her.

She nodded.

"I was shocked but then I became angry with him you know? I mean was he really that scared of you and that feeling that he was willing to do what he did with me?"

A shiver ran down my spine and I tried to shake it away.

"Well I have to get back, but we'll talk soon, okay?"

"Okay! Be safe and thank you, Brooke, for forgiving me, I am going to do whatever it takes to make sure I never disappoint you again." She said as she pulled me into her arms.

I smiled and hoped I was doing the right thing. After everything that has happened in the past few weeks, I am tired of being angry with people. I want to have a stress free life as well and holding grudges against people doesn't help matters. Peyton and I would get to where we need to be again, it will just take time.

I finished up at the boutique and started driving back to the house. I parked my car in the driveway and walked inside. Haley and Lucas were in the kitchen and when I walked in I saw Lucas laughing like I haven't seen him laugh since high school. My heart fluttered and I couldn't help the smile that came across my face.

"Hey you two. What ya doing?" I tossed my purse onto the bar and Haley pulled me into a hug.

"Oh nothing we were just talking about that one time we TP'd Mr. Sullivan's house."

I shook my head and I remembered like it was yesterday.

"_I can not believe I am going doing this." Haley held a carton of eggs._

_I had several packs of gummy bears, sharks, and worms. Nathan had the box of forks and a jumbo pack of toilet in his other hand, Peyton had the Oreos, and Lucas had in each hand a jumbo pack of toilet paper as well._

"_Fuck him Hales. You did not deserve that F on your paper. He's just a dick." Lucas scoffed as we were all dressed in black gathered in a circle a block from his house._

"_Haley come on! You never do anything daring and this would totally make you feel better!" I said as I threw my arm around her._

"_Okay." She nodded._

_Nathan had this huge grin across his face and then he listed off everyone's task._

"_Okay here's the deal. Peyton is going to scrape off the Oreo filling under Sullivan's car door handles. Haley is going to help me fork the yard. Brooke you are going to place the gummies on all of his windows as well as his car and when the sun comes out, they'll stick! Lucas will start with the toilet paper and when everyone is done with their primary task, we'll all help TP, and then Haley will do the honors of quietly egging all around the house. We want him to wake up the next morning completely flustered!"_

_Haley, Peyton, and I giggled as Lucas wiggled his eyebrows. We all made our way towards Mr. Sullivan's house and lucky for us he was one of the last houses tucked away from the main road. _

_Once we were there, we all started our own task. Peyton started with the Oreos, I started with the gummies which took me some time because I had to lick each one of them as without the sun making them stick, I had to do my best. Of course, when Lucas caught me doing this it turned him on and I had to mouth to him, 'later' as he gave me his puppy dog eyes. Haley and Nathan were a whirlwind with forking the yard. Peyton was done quickly and started helping Lucas TP the trees, parts of the house, then we all started with the toilet paper. _

"_Okay Hales! Do the honors!" Nathan gave Haley a quick kiss._

_Haley had this devilish grin on her face and she began to throw the eggs against his door, she egged his car, and some of the last eggs she had she threw them on the roof. We all stood back and looked at our damage and I had to say I was impressed. We did good! _

"That was a great night. Do you remember the next morning? He was livid and he wanted to peg the whole thing on Lucas." Haley said as she laughed and Lucas was smirking.

"Yeah, well I had an airtight alibi, remember? Keith saved my ass because he remembered Sullivan when he was in high school. He was the ultimate douche."

We reminisced a little longer and then Haley changed the subject after Lucas went upstairs.

"I think it's great, Brooke."

I looked up at her and she was smiling.

"What?"

"Being there for Lucas like you are. I mean, duh, we know you're going to Tree Hill with him. I think it's great!" She made herself a glass of water and I grinned.

"Yeah, well I think it will be good for us. We really haven't spent any alone time together since he's been back, maybe it will give me a chance to see the Lucas I know he can be."

We talked some more and I mentioned my talk with Peyton. She was shocked but agreed with me that it's in the past and there are so many more important things in life than hold a grudge that happened so long ago. I walked upstairs and saw Lucas's door open, I peaked inside to find him clutching his heart and I panicked.

"Lucas, are you okay?" I ran in and was by his side.

"Whoa, yeah, I'm fine." He placed his hands on my arms to reassure me.

"I'm fine, Brooke, I was just thinking about facing my mother. It is already breaking my heart."

I released the breath I was holding and he smiled at me.

"Just please don't do that again, you scared me."

He chuckled and I grinned.

"Are you ready to go?" He winked at me and grabbed his bag.

"Uh, yeah just let me change into something more casual, and I'll grab my bag." I packed last night and laid out a change of clothes for me to wear on our two hour drive to Tree Hill.

I changed into a pair of navy shorts, a white blouse, and a pair of eco-friendly sandals. I grabbed my bag and followed Lucas downstairs. Nathan hadn't gotten back yet, and we said our goodbyes to Haley.

"You two have a safe trip and give all of our love to your mom and Lily, Lucas. It will be okay. She loves you more than anything." Haley kissed Lucas's cheek and gave me a quick hug.

Lucas rented a car for us as he planned on bringing back Keith's mustang. I had to admit I missed that car too. After Keith's sudden death shortly after Lily's birth, the car became something more valuable to him. Lucas took my bag along with his and placed them in the trunk. He gave me a smile, we both got into the car and he took in a deep breath as he rubbed his hands together.

"You ready?" He asked as he turned to face me.

I nodded and we started heading towards Tree Hill. Lucas turned the radio on and we rode in silence for awhile as different rock songs echoed throughout the car. We were on the road for about fifteen minutes when Lucas spoke.

"You want to make a pit stop? Get snacks or anything?" He was being awfully quiet and I knew this was really scaring him.

His mother was a mother to us all and she was the kindest person I knew. Lucas always tried to do his best by her and keeping something this huge from her is going to devastate her. Lucas tried his damnedest to never disappoint her and if I know him the way I do, he's going to think of this as a disappointment.

We pulled into a gas station and as he walked around the car, he held his hand out to me and I placed mine in his. It seemed so natural with Lucas. We didn't have to speak. I went for the chocolate covered peanuts, Reese's cups and Lucas grabbed me a Cherry Coke and him a Monster. We met up at the counter and he grinned at me.

"You remembered." He said. I smiled.

"As did you."

He paid and we went back to the car. Another twenty minutes on the road, I was honestly getting tired of hearing angsty rock music. As I flipped through the channels, the start of a familiar song started to play that made Lucas flinch and a huge grin come across my face. I turned to face him and I didn't have to say anything before he cut me short.

"NO!" He said never taking his eyes off the road.

"Lucas, pleeeeaaaasssseeee…" I held my hands clasped together over my chest and gave him puppy dog eyes.

"No." He said eyes still on the road.

"For old time's sake? For me?" I begged.

"I thought I saw a man brought to life. He was warm, he came around and he was dignified. He showed me what it was to cry." I started to sing and he began to shake his head.

"Well, you couldn't be that man I adored. You don't seem to know. Seem to care what your heart is for. But I don't know him anymore." I continued to sing and I could see the corners of his mouth form into a smile.

"There's nothing where he used to lie. The conversation has run dry."

"That's what's going on. Nothing's fine, I'm torn. I'm all out of faith. This is how I feel.  
>I'm cold and I am shamed. Lying naked on the floor." And just like old times, Lucas sang at the top of his lungs in the squeakiest, girlish voice he could ever possess.<p>

I immediately burst into a fit of cackling and he smiled at me.

"Illusion never changed into something real. I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn. You're a little late, I'm already torn." I began to sing with him in the same kind of voice.

"Take it away, babe." I said to him and he got all melodramatic with his facial expressions.

"So I guess the fortune teller's right. Should have seen just what was there and not some holy light." He said batting his eyes and I couldn't help but let out another cackle.

"It crawled beneath my veins and now I don't care I had no luck. I don't miss it all that much. There's just so many things that I can touch, I'm torn." Then he raised his voice higher and I began to sing with him.

"I'm all out of faith. This is how I feel. I'm cold and I am shamed lying naked on the floor." We continued to sing together in high pitch, off key voices.

"Illusion never changed into something real. I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn. You're a little late, I'm already torn, torn."

"Torn." He carried on as I couldn't help the tears falling down my face.

"Oooooooooooooooooh…ooooooooooooooooh…oooooooooooooooooh." If it was even possible his voice got higher.

"There's nothing where he used to lie. My inspiration has run dry. That's what's going on  
>Nothing's right, I'm torn." I sang in the softest voice.<p>

"I'm all out of faith this is how I feel. I'm cold and I am shamed lying naked on this floor." He sang again and I couldn't control the tears anymore as my stomach and sides began to ache.

"Illusion never changed into something real. I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn. I'm all out of faith. This is how I feel. I'm cold and I'm ashamed bound and broken on the floor. You're a little late, I'm already torn, torn." He continued and as the end of the song neared and the guitar solo came on, he made his own little sound with his voice to imitate the guitar and I was dying.

I joined in with him and we stopped as the song ended and I began wiping the tears away and he quickly changed the station back to angsty rock music.

"That's the last time I will ever do that!" He said and my stomach still in pain from laughing so hard, I shook my head.

"Whatever, Luke, you said that the last time." I looked over at him and his straight face broke into smile.

It was just like old times. I will not forget the first time that song came on and I began to sing it and to make fun of me, Lucas mocked me and it turned into a thing with us. He would make me laugh so hard where I would cry and my sides would be in pain from laughing and crying so hard.

"It's so good to see you laugh like that again." He said.

I looked over at him and studied him. He was my Lucas, but a new Lucas entirely; I couldn't help the smile on my face.

"Yeah you too." I said.

He smiled as he still faced the road and I looked out the window as we drove through a few small towns.

We drove in some more silence as it was comforting to us both. Some more angsty rock music played in the background as Lucas was afraid to hear yet another girly pop song I could coax him into singing.

The 'Welcome to Tree Hill' sign came into our view and I could hear Lucas's grip tighten around the steering wheel.

"Lucas, it's going to be okay." I reached over and gave his knee a reassuring squeeze.

We drove down the main street of Tree Hill and parked in front of the familiar café we would go to everyday back in high school. We sat in the car for a few minutes and I was about to get out, but Lucas reached for my hand.

"You're going to be there for me through everything?" He asked as he looked over at me.

Lucas was promised a lot in his life and a lot has been taken away from him. So I tightened my fingers around his hand and smiled.

"Every step of the way."

He smiled and we got out of the car and headed towards the entrance of the café. The little bell rang and the raven haired woman behind the counter had her back to us.

"Please take a seat where you like, I'll be with you in a moment." She called out behind her back.

"LUKIE!" The little girl sitting in the corner spotted us and ran towards Lucas.

"Lily pad!" He called out to her and swept her off her feet and gathered her in his arms.

Karen turned around quickly when she heard Lily and she began to cry.

"Lucas!" Karen said quietly.

"Brookie!" Lily said and I took her from Lucas and gave her a big hug.

Lucas smiled at me and walked over to his mom and embraced her as a loving son would his beloved mother. Lily buried her face in my neck and I kissed the top of her head as I watched Lucas with his mom. Karen finally opened her eyes and saw me. I smiled.

"Brooke?" She pulled back from Lucas, gave him a curious glance and he let out a huge sigh.

I placed Lily back on her feet as she ran back over to Lucas and Karen walked over to me.

"Hey Karen." I said quietly and she smiled and pulled me into her arms.

"Brooke it is so good to see you. Looks like you've got some explaining to do." She whispered in my ear.

Of course, Karen would be shocked to see Lucas and me together after what happened in high school.

"This is a surprise Lucas, I wish you would have told me you were coming, I would have had Anna or Kelly take over for me." Karen wiped her hands on her apron.

"Mom I wanted to surprise you." Lucas said.

"Well are you two hungry? Anything you want it's on me." She said.

"I would love your amazing pot pie, Karen." I couldn't resist this woman's amazing cooking.

"You still make that chicken casserole?" Lucas asked as he started to tickle a squealing Lily.

"Of course my boy. It will be right up." She winked at me and we went to sit with Lily who continued to read the book we interrupted her from.

Lucas and I enjoyed our dinner. It was like Christmas every time you were able to get your stomach full on Karen's delicious food. Karen insisted that we go ahead and head to the house, but Lucas stayed behind with his mom as I am sure he was going to take this opportunity to tell his mom while they were alone.

Lucas gave me his set of keys and Lily and I took the rental car to his childhood home.

"How are you doing Queen Lily?" I asked her as she still had her pretty, little face buried in the book.

"It's good, I am making a lot of friends now and I have the most points in my reading level." She said proudly.

I snorted at her and it made her giggle. She was a bright six years old and Lucas in every form except for his asshole ways. She was smart, bright, intelligent, and already at the age of six she was reading like a maniac. It made me smile because when I look at her, I know that she is Lucas's flesh and blood. We got to the house and with Lily's hand in mine, we headed towards the house and once inside, she ran down the hall and I followed her.

"This is where you'll sleep, Brookie!" She said as she reached on her tip toes to turn the light on.

My heart fluttered as the room was still the same. Although I visited Karen and Lily frequently over the years, I never once stepped foot inside Lucas's room because it only reminded me of high school and him. The walls were still the red and green plaid flannel, the music posters were still hanging, and I grinned as I walked to his chest of drawers. The pictures were still in their rightful place. One was of the five of us. Lucas had his arms around me from behind, I had one of my hands wrapped around his arms, and my other around Peyton's neck, she had one of her arms around my waist with her other around Haley, Haley had one of her arms wrapped around my arm that was around Peyton, and Nathan had Haley and Peyton enveloped in his arms as he reached out towards me. Those were the best times of our lives when we were all innocent and none of us were dating each other.

The other photo I took and it was right after Lily was born and he was holding the beautiful baby girl in his arms. I don't think I ever saw him so happy before until this point in his life. It was right before everything fell a part between us. The other was of a younger Lucas with Keith. I couldn't help the tears that began to form in my eyes.

"Are you alright Brookie?" Lily wrapped her arms around my leg and I smiled.

"Of course I am." I knelt down at eye level with her and she looked just like Keith.

"How about we watch a movie and wait for your mom and brother to get back?"

She nodded and she knew which movie she wanted to watch: Toy Story. We started the movie with Lily in my lap and about half way through the movie it hit me just how tired I was and I dozed off waiting for mother and son to get home.

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><p><strong>Song: "Torn" by Natalie Imbruglia.<strong>

**YES, that is a true story! My ex, Sean, caught me singing this song and started mimicking me and it became a thing that whenever it came on, he would sing it in a high, girly voice that left me laughing so hard that I would cry and buckle over in pain. (and this happened a lot with all types of girly, pop songs) So there ya go!  
><strong>

**Up next: Lucas tells Karen. Brooke and Lily have a little fun! I will also provide a flashback of Keith's death and what happened.  
><strong>

**Stay tuned! You guys are awesome!  
><strong>


	11. A Day in Tree Hill

**HEY EVERYONE! New chapter is up! I love all the reviews I am getting on this story...let me just say this much...there will be a happy ending...dun dun dun...lol**_  
><em>

**Enjoy!  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 11: A Day in Tree Hill<br>**

**"No regrets, just love  
><strong>

**We can dance until we die  
><strong>

**You and I, will be young forever"  
><strong>

**-Teenage Dream, Katy Perry  
><strong>

_I couldn't stop laughing. I honestly don't think I have ever laughed this hard in my life. _

"_This is not funny! I truly don't understand how I got into this situation in the first place!" He was whispering through the phone._

_I squirmed as the pain in my back intensified from all the laughing._

"_Just describe the scene to me." _

"_Okay I am looking at all different descriptions. What brand first of all?" _

"_I prefer Tampax pearls if you see them? Sky blue box." I balled up in the fetal position on my back to help ease the pain. _

"_It has been detected…good lord there are so many different types! Size?" _

_I could tell he was in total shock at the realization that there were so many different types to choose from. I could also hear him shuffling around from what I would assume is him trying to hide his identity._

"_Lucas focus! I prefer regulars at this point." _

"_Whoa…what does scented mean? Why would you want a scented plug?" _

_I laughed again._

"_Did you just call it a plug?" That sounded grotesque._

"_Well yeah…scented or unscented…" He said through gritted teeth._

"_Unscented preferred."_

"_Okay slowly walking away now." _

"_Did you get the Advil as well? And my chocolate ice cream?" I hurried out._

"_Yes! Can I go and embarrass myself at the register now?" He pleaded._

"_Okay, you did well Trooper!" _

"_Thanks I'm out!" _

"_Bye Luke." I lay back in his bed and tried taking deep breaths and relaxing. _

_Karen was eight months pregnant and I offered to cook dinner to save her some trouble. Of course halfway through cooking I realized I started my period. Lucky for me, Lucas was already at the store for Karen, so I called him and was relieved that he was still at there. He was not too happy about it but knowing that he was willing to do it for me was something special right? _

_About twenty minutes later, I was able to make it back into the kitchen to finish cooking. Keith arrived shortly before Luke did and not after Keith went to check in on Karen did the front door slam shut and Lucas was leaning up against it letting out a breath of relief. I giggled at him._

"_You know I am pretty sure you will be the death of me woman." He said and I smiled._

_It has only been about a week since we started seeing each other but Karen and Keith weren't aware just yet. He looked around and snuck a quick kiss before handing over my special bag._

"_I am not ever doing that again. Do you understand?" He said giving me another kiss._

"_Thank you!" I chirped._

_He rolled his eyes and took off his jacket. _

"_Do you need any help pretty girl?" Now that we were sleeping together when he called me that it sounded different, better._

"_No, but Keith just got home if you want to check on those two." I winked at him and he kissed the side of my face before leaving the kitchen._

* * *

><p>"What's going on Lucas?"<p>

I finished wiping down the last table and started placing the chairs on the tables.

"Mom, nothing." I started getting nervous and scared and I really wished I hadn't sent Brooke away.

She walked past me to the front door, locked it, pulled the curtains and walked over to me.

"Lucas, I haven't seen you since Christmas which was a couple of months ago and then you show up with Brooke of all people? Last time I checked you two weren't even talking to each other." She crossed her arms and I started to shake.

"Lucas, what is going on?"

When I looked down at the scared look on her face, I grabbed her hands in mine and brought her to sit down with me.

"I moved to Durham about a month ago, I've started taking classes at Duke, and I'm living with Nathan, Haley, and Brooke."

A look of shock came across her face and she pulled back from me.

"Wow, that's a surprise. And you being here with Brooke?" She questioned.

"Brooke and I have been working on our relationship, friendship, whatever it is." I said and I began to shake again.

"Lucas what are you not telling me?" She reached across the table and grabbed one of my hands.

"It's my heart, Ma. It's pretty bad."

She gripped my hand tighter with her small ones and looked up at me.

"Lucas I know about the HCM, I mean it is bad, but you are taking your medication aren't you?" She was getting scared and I didn't want to do this.

"Yes mom, but my heart it is just too fragile. I've been going to see one of the best doctors in the country about my heart. Mom…" I looked into her eyes as we both began to cry.

"They are giving me six months unless I can get a new heart."

She dropped my hand and brought hers over her mouth.

"No! You are healthy, strong, and you are so young, Luke." She got up from her chair and rushed over to me and pulled me into her arms.

"It's going to be okay." I said as I held her and she cried.

"I can't lose you too. I just…I just can't." Her grip around me got tighter.

"I am going to pull through this just like I do everything else." I said trying to stop crying myself but I couldn't especially when I'm with my mom.

"Why didn't you tell me this any sooner?" She was on the verge of angry.

"Because I was hoping I could get it taken care of before I got the worst news and I didn't want to worry you because I don't like seeing you this way, Ma, I mean after Uncle Keith's death…"

She began to shake her head and pulled out of my arms.

"Yes, Luke, I went through a lot after Keith died, but you are _my_ son! You and Lily are my life! I can not lose you…I mean your children are supposed to outlive you." She grabbed my face in between her hands and pulled me back into a hug.

"I promise mom, I am going to survive this. I am going to do this for you, Lily, Brooke, Nathan, and Haley…I am not leaving any of you, I promise!" I tightened my arms around her.

"I know you will because you are my son; you are the strongest person I know." She said into my chest.

After we both controlled our emotions, we finished closing the café and headed towards the house. As I drove, my mom held my hand the entire way.

The moment I unlocked the front door, Lily ran into the kitchen and put her finger over her mouth. Mom and I looked at each other and I tiptoed over to Lily and picked her up in my arms.

"Brooke is sleeping, be quiet!" She whispered and I smiled at her.

"Lily how about we get you ready for bed?" My mom said and Lily and I gave her a pouty look.

"Oh that look from the _both_ of you will not work on me." She walked towards me and pulled Lily from my arms.

She looked at me and kissed my cheek.

"I love you." She said to me.

"I love you both." I kissed my mom then Lily.

They disappeared down the hallway towards Lily's room quietly trying not to disturb Brooke who was sleeping on the couch as the Toy Story credits started rolling. She was balled up near one end of the couch and I could tell she was dreaming. I cut the TV off and kneeled down to pick her up. Her arms instinctually went around my neck. I started down the hall and opened the door to my room. I lay her down on the bed and she turns on her side and lets out a little whimper. I smiled and started for the door.

"I had a dream."

I turned around to face her.

"What?"

"I was dreaming about that night you went and got me tampons." She sat up on her elbows with sleepy eyes.

I laughed.

"Yeah that will _never_ happen again that one is a definite!" I pointed at her, she smiled and yawned.

"How did things go with your mom?" She asked quietly.

I leaned against the door frame and crossed my arms.

"Better than I expected. She of course cried and freaked out, but she loves me and she believes I will pull through this." I look at her and she lies back in the bed.

"Nothing has changed in here." She looks around the room and I furrow my brow.

"I haven't been in here since the last time we were together." She looks at me and blushes.

"Wow. I'm sorry."

"No it's fine Lucas, trust me I've been tempted but it helped me not think about you or remember the pain I went through."

I hated hearing her speak that way. Speak of the way I hurt her and to think of me…

"It's okay, Lucas really, things are so much different between us now."

I smiled at her, rubbed my hand on the back of my neck, and took a deep breath.

"Okay, well if you need anything, well, you know where everything is," I smiled again.

"I know. Goodnight Lucas."

"Goodnight Brooke." I walked back down the hallway and got the couch set up for me to sleep on. I cut the TV on and made myself comfortable on the sofa. I fell asleep instantly after a tiring day.

* * *

><p>I had a dream again last night. Well they aren't dreams; they are memories that replay in my mind. This one was actually a bad memory.<p>

_Lucas and I were at Haley's doing a History assignment, the least favorite subject of all of us. Lucas's cell phone rang._

"_Mom?" _

_I looked over at him and all the color in his face drained. _

"_Lucas what is it?" I rested my hand on his thigh and tears dared to leave his eyes._

_He dropped the phone and looked over at me._

"_You're scaring me." I felt my heart stop beating._

"_Keith, he's, he's dead." Lucas just stared past me not really revealing any emotion._

"_What?" Haley gasped and looked over at me._

"_Lucas, what happened?" I placed my hands on his face gently to make him turn towards me, he was like a zombie._

"_He, he was working at the shop and he had a stroke, he, they said it was probably painless, and he went quickly." Lucas got up from the table and walked out the door. _

_Haley and I hurried to our feet and when I got to the door, Lucas was nowhere in sight but the mustang was still sitting outside. _

"_Where did he go?" Haley asked in a panic. _

_I started looking around and Lucas was nowhere. _

"BOOOKIE!"

I snapped out of my memory and saw Lily running into the room in her pajamas and she jumps on the bed.

"Hey Queen Lily." I brushed the hair from my face.

"It's just me and you!" She said with a huge smile on her face.

I was about to ask her what she meant but Lily pointed to the nightstand and I saw a note scribbled in Lucas's handwriting.

_Brooke- Ma and I went to the store to buy food for dinner this evening. Take care of my Lily pad for me. –Always, Lucas_

"Mommy left me a note too saying I should be extra good for you." She giggled.

I picked her up in my arms and crawled out of the bed. She was giggling the entire time I carried her into the kitchen and I even started to bite her playfully along her neck and another fit of giggles filled the room. I sat her in the seat at the table and started looking around the kitchen.

"I'm hungry, Brookie!"

"Oh yeah? I am too." I looked in the fridge and the cabinets and was relieved that there was enough ingredients to make pancakes.

"Would you like the famous Brooke Davis pancakes?" I asked her and she nodded.

"Do you want to help?" I asked and she got this goofy grin on her face.

"Okay, well come on." I walked over to her, grabbed the chair she was sitting in and placed it against the counter so she could see what I was doing.

I rushed to Lucas's room quickly, grabbed his stereo, and hurried back into the kitchen. I turned on the music and a catchy pop song started to play in the background.

"What can I do?" She asked.

"Well, let's roll up your sleeves." I helped Lily roll her sleeves up and I braided her beautiful chestnut curls to stay out of her face and it fell along her back.

"Have you ever cracked an egg?" I asked her and she shook her head.

"Well this is what you do."

I instructed Lily how to do it and she did it perfectly. She helped me pour the milk, sugar, flour, and the rest of the ingredients.

"OH! I love this song." Lily squeaked as I started hearing what the song was and I looked at her appalled.

"Lily, how do you know this song?" I asked her and should have already known the answer.

"Whenever Rachel visits, she plays this song and we dance to it."

I shook my head because I am sure Karen would not approve. Lily started dancing in her chair and I laughed at her. In the beginning, Rachel was Karen's least favorite people. Of course hearing her story and how her parents were just as absent as mine, she took pity on her and actually saw where most of the behavior came from. Rachel began to work in the café shortly after we became friends and they both grew a respect for each other and Karen always invited Rachel to holiday dinners.

"I'm burning up and up, I'm burning up and up, so won't you sexy people burn it up." Lily sang and I burst out laughing.

Then as I got the frying pan heated up, Lily helped me pour the mix in the pan and she started dancing around the kitchen. Of course, I never really cared for this song but as it continued playing, I started to shake my hips a little and when I would catch Lily in the corner of my eye, she was shaking her hips side to side and she was absolutely adorable. I turned the heat to medium and started dancing with her. We started shaking our butts and I grabbed her hands and started twirling her and then she did a move only Rachel could have taught her. She started rolling her shoulders and then fist pumping and I was almost embarrassed and ashamed that I was letting Lily do this, but it was cute and it was intoxicating as I began to do the same thing.

I started humming the song and then doing my white girl dance and Lily was laughing at me and when I turned towards the kitchen door flopping my limbs and bopping my head all over the place, I was greeted with a sly grin on Lucas's face as he leaned against the door frame with Karen standing behind him with her mouth hanging open. I immediately stopped dancing and cut the radio off and Lily was giggling in the background and went back to her chair and flipped the second batch of pancakes.

"Hi, Karen, sorry." I said turning all shades of red and Lucas chuckled.

"No, it's fine, I was just more interested in where my six year old daughter learned how to dance that way." She said then winked at me and I let out a sigh of relief.

Lucas had his mouth by my ear and I shivered at his closeness.

"I thought it was extremely sexy…I sure do miss that ass of yours." He lightly caressed my lower back and winked at me as well.

He followed his mom further into the kitchen and helped her unload the bags of food. I blushed again and went to help Lily with the pancakes. We were able to cook six of them. Everyone got two except Lily because she couldn't even finish her first one.

Lucas insisted that he clean up the mess that Lily and I had created and I took this opportunity to take a shower. Once I was done, I pulled the curtain back and just like his first day in Durham, there he was shaving in front of the mirror, but this time he didn't turn to look at me. He kept his eyes forward and handed me my towel. I was appalled and disappointed at the same time. I was appalled because he was being a gentleman but disappointed because I wanted him to look at me and smirk at me. I wrapped the towel around me and even though I was the one who wanted to take things slow and work on our friendship I found myself flirting and aggravating the situation. I reached around him and got my toothbrush. He scooted to the side and arched an eyebrow at me. I didn't acknowledge him as I put the toothpaste on my brush and started brushing my teeth.

He continued shaving and when he was done, he rinsed his razor, and wiped his face down as I continued to brush. It was a nice silence and I loved it. We were having a lot of those moments lately and I couldn't get enough of them. Lucky for me, I noticed that some of his shaving cream fell against his naked stomach. I finished brushing my teeth, took my hand and slowly wiped it from his stomach. I felt him shiver under my touch and I looked up at him as his eyes were closed.

"What are you doing, Brooke?" He let out huskily.

"You just had a spot on your stomach from shaving…" I looked back down to my hand still lingering on his ripped abs.

"It's gone now." He choked out and then I noticed his bulge increasing in size.

"Brooke, stop." He grabbed my hand away from him.

"I'm, I'm sorry." I yanked my hand down to my side and started gathering my make up.

"Brooke, you have no idea how much I want you…I've been wanting you since the day I fucked things up, but you said you wanted to take things slow and work on our friendship and when you touch me that way…it makes it very hard for me to not be that guy you want me to be."

It almost pained me to hear him speak this way.

"I'm sorry." I walked out of the bathroom, dropped my stuff on the bed and just when I was about to turn back to say something to him, Lucas was pulling me against him and his lips were on mine. My hands snaked up his naked shoulders and reached the hair around the nape of his neck pulling him closer to me. The towel started to loosen around my body, but he held it in place as his lips devoured mine in a vigorous kiss leaving us both wanting more.

We pulled back from each other and he rested his forehead against mine and I still had my eyes closed.

"One day, Brooke…but I am trying my damnedest to do right by you…and I can't keep just kissing you like this…so for now…just remember it." He kissed the tip of my nose and walked away.

I was left speechless and breathless. My towel no longer covered my backside as I held it against my front side. He went back into the bathroom to get dressed and I got dressed quickly and left the room.

Karen was sitting at the kitchen table staring off into space as Lily was in her room getting dressed as well.

"Karen?" I sat down across from her and she gave me a kind hearted smile.

"Brooke, darling, how are you?"

I haven't really spoken to Karen since we got here and I figured this would be the perfect time for us to speak alone.

"I am doing okay…I have to admit I was a little shocked when I discovered Lucas was moving in with us…of course, Haley and Nathan would wait until the day of to tell me." I chuckled slightly and she smiled.

"Well I can see that you two have come a long way." She smiled as she took a sip of her coffee.

"Yeah, I guess, you know I am not even really sure we've dealt with the past just yet. I just know that the first week he was the usual charming ass hole and then with time he got a little better and then he dropped the heavy news on me a few days ago." I clasped my hands together and I saw tears surface behind her eyes.

"Well it is so good to see you around my son again. I think about you as the kids you once were. You were all so innocent." She grinned and I smiled.

"How are you doing with everything that is happening?" I reached out and touched her hand.

"I just keep thinking about Keith and how sudden he went. We didn't have any notice and just like that he was gone. I mean we were barely together when I got pregnant and we worked the whole nine months working on a relationship and then he was taken away from me." Tears started to stream down her face and I tried my best to not let mine fall as well.

"Although there is a slight possibility that Lucas may not make it, I believe strongly that he will pull through this. Lucas is the strongest, willing, driven person I know. I mean when he has his eyes set on something he will succeed no matter what the cost." I said with all the strength and assurance I had in me.

She smiled and clutched my hand in hers.

"I am so blessed that you are in our lives, Brooke. I always wanted a daughter and although I was finally graced with my precious Lily, you were always considered my own Brooke and you still are." She smiled and I got up and walked over to pull her in a hug.

My parents are still very much absent in my life. They pay for my tuition and majority of my bills, but they are never there like how Karen has always been. We were interrupted by Lucas holding Lily and flying her around as if she were a plane.

"Wow, why is everyone crying?" Lucas asked very well knowing why but nobody wanted to worry the young six year old.

"They are happy tears my son." Karen stood up and kissed Lucas's face and pulled Lily from his arms.

"So…what's the plan for today?" I asked as I shoved my hands in my pockets.

"You know I am not too sure. Now that we're here I think I just want to spend time with my mom and Lily. So whatever they want to do." He crossed his arms and smiled at me.

We spent majority of the day at the River Court while Karen and I were both concerned about Lucas running around with Lily playing basketball but he reassured us he was fine. It was so sweet and wonderful to see Lucas as playful and happy as he was being around the little bundle of joy that was Lily. Karen asked me about the future and where I see myself and honestly I wasn't sure. With everything that has happened in the past few weeks I couldn't lie to myself and not say that Lucas was not involved in my future because he was.

After spending a breezy day at the River Court, we met up with Mouth and Skills at the ice cream shop and it turned out to be a fantastic day. Once we were back at the house, Lucas and I both cooked dinner. We glided around the kitchen in sync. If I forgot to add the hint of cayenne pepper to the vegetables, Lucas read my mind and added a pinch for me. If Lucas forgot to flip the chicken in the sauté pan, I would beat him to it as he finished chopping up the bell peppers. It was blissful being able to work this way with someone besides Haley. Karen even noticed it and it made me blush and roll my eyes at the same time.

Lucas read Lily a bed time story while I got ready for bed. Once I was settled under the sheets I started reading a worn out copy of _The Winter of Our Discontent_.

"I knew you always loved that book."

I looked up to see Lucas standing in the doorway leaning casually against it like he always does.

"Well once upon a time someone begged me to read it and I never wanted to give him the satisfaction that I enjoyed it." I never once looked up from my reading as I could feel his smirk from across the room.

"Yeah, well I guess I have to admit that I actually enjoyed those dance classes you made me take with you."

My head shot up quickly from the book and I eyeballed him. I zeroed in on him.

"You lie."

"I am dead serious, Brooke. I really did enjoy them and what made it even better was being there with you."

"Please, I bet you don't remember anything about those dance classes." I said burying my face back into the book as I flipped the page.

I heard Lucas move around the room. I watched as he pulled out a CD I wasn't familiar by its cover and he placed it into his stereo. The melody started to play and I instantly recognized it. He held his hand out to me and it was like I was sucked in his trance. I dropped the book delicately on the bed and placed my petite, soft hand into his callous, large one and he gently pulled me to my feet.

His right arm went around my waist as I let my left hand rest on his shoulder. He began to lead us around the room in the basic steps of the waltz we learned together. I have never seen him be so graceful in his movements. Lucas has always been rigid, rough, jagged with his movements and actions, but this was soft, delicate, and elegant. I let him glide us across the small space between his patio door and his bed.

We were interrupted by Karen clearing her throat.

"I don't mean to interrupt, I just wanted to say goodnight to my son before I go to bed." She said and the moment Lucas released me from his arms, I desperately wanted him back.

I watched as Lucas embraced his mother with all the love he had in him and she held onto him for dear life.

"I love you my son."

"I love you too, mom."

I flinched inwardly and outwardly as I heard him speak those three little words I have longed to hear him say to me ever since I was thirteen. It killed me to hear him say those words to anyone knowing that it's not ever been to me. I quickly got myself together and got back into the bed.

Karen waved bye to me and left the room. When Lucas turned around he became confused.

"I am tired Lucas, I think I am going to read a little bit more and then just go to sleep. I'll see you in the morning." I quickly looked back down and started reading again.

Lucas let out a long, frustrated sigh. I think he knew what was bothering me, just by his posture and the lines crinkling across his forehead.

"Goodnight Brooke. We'll head back to Durham tomorrow after we eat breakfast."

I nodded and he closed the door behind him. I dropped the book to the bed and let my head fall back onto the pillow.

What the hell is wrong with me? I initiate something inappropriate earlier that led to some heavy kissing…then we are in an intimate embrace dancing a casual waltz and the minute I hear him say those small three words, I shut down and my heart breaks all over again. Was he ever going to say those words to me? Was I ever going to hear, _I love you Brooke_? Maybe it is just best that we remain friends and don't let it go any further because I am not sure if I will ever be able to give him what I desperately want if I can't believe that he'll ever say those words to me.

"_I am trying my damnedest to do right by you..."_

Could it be possible that he could say those words to me someday? I pulled the vacant pillow beside me and covered my face as if I was going to suffocate myself and screamed into the pillow.

Just let him be the one to make the first move…who knows maybe someday soon he'll say those three little words…those three little words you have whispered in his ear to him before.

"I love you, Lucas." I breathed.

* * *

><p><strong>The song Lily was singing..."Burning Up" by Nick Carter...GOD I thought that song was terrible and stupid when I first heard it, and then the more I heard it...the more it turned into a guilty pleasure of mine...it's the song I do my white girl dance in my underwear...oh yeah I said it and I do it! lol<strong>

**But anyways...Thoughts on this chapters? I loved writing it...I love the overwhelming, confused feelings going through Brooke as I have done this over and over from time and time again...lol**

**Up next: BL returns to Durham...and Brooke runs into a familiar person again...stay tuned!  
><strong>


	12. Too Close

**A/N: Sorry I've been a little M.I.A. My brother was in a bad car accident last Wednesday and I've been a wreck, but after some physical therapy, he's going to be fine, so I was able to work on a chapter for one of my stories. This chapter is a just a bit of a filler as the next episode skips to the spring break fun to begin!**

**Thanks! Enjoy!  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 12: Too Close<br>**

**"And it feels like I am just too close to love you**

**There's nothing I can really say**

**I can't lie no more, I can't hide no more**

**Got to be true to myself**

**And it feels like I am just too close to love you**

**So I'll be on my way"**

**-Too Close, Alex Clare**

The morning we had to leave Tree Hill was almost saddening. Even though we were here less than forty eight hours, it seemed like we had become comfortable here. This time I made breakfast for everyone. Lily wanted to show Brooke her new bike and as my mother and I sat on the porch drinking coffee watching the two, my mother rested her hand on my shoulder.

"I never understood." She shook her head as she took another sip of her coffee.

My attention immediately turned to her and I looked at her like she was stupid.

"What?"

"Why you would cheat on Brooke in high and ruin a perfectly great friendship? I knew you were keeping the relationship part a secret those first couple of weeks; I mean she has made it very clear how she feels about you and Lucas…" She rests her hand on my forearm and takes a deep breath.

"It's written all over your face how you feel about her. Why do you not tell her how you feel? Why did you cheat on her back in high school?"

I never told my mom why I did it even though she pestered the hell out of me about it. I looked up again and saw Brooke laughing as her dimples gleamed in the sunlight and her eyes were squeezed tight as Lily began to tickle her.

"See, Lucas! Your face is glowing as you look at her. The only time I've ever seen that look on your face was when Lily was born. You are in love with Brooke."

I stopped breathing for a moment and looked back over at Brooke who was now just sitting on the lawn talking to Lily.

"Of course I am Ma."

"Then why can't you go over to that amazing young woman and tell her that? Lucas what is holding you back from this?" She sounded so heartbroken to know that I've never confessed my feelings to Brooke.

"Because I watched you lose the one person you ever really loved with all of your heart. I saw you date men who only destroyed your heart and then when you are finally given a chance to be with a man who loved you more than anything else, bam, just like that, he was gone and you were left heartbroken again."

"Lucas!"

I turned to face her and she started to shed silent tears.

"What I went through was my own fault. I knew some of those guys were not the greatest and I chose to never tell your Uncle Keith how I felt until the last moment. Yes we had an amazing year together and he gave me one of the most precious gifts: your amazing sister." She pulled me into a hug and I wanted to cry myself.

"I just…I never wanted to feel the way I saw you feel after these guys broke your heart. I definitely never wanted to go through what you went through after you lost Keith. I just…I could never bear it if I lost Brooke—"

"Lucas, she's right there!" My mother pointed towards Brooke who was now braiding Lily's hair as she told her a story.

"Brooke has always been there despite your dickhead moments and jerk off attitude."

My mouth dropped at the language my mother was using to describe me of all people.

"Yes my boy, you heard me correctly. It's how you acted back then and it's how you are acting now. Now only is she here Luke, but God forbid it, but if something _were_ to happen to you in six months…let the girl know how you feel before it's too late Luke, because you already know how she feels."

"Or felt."

"No Lucas, it never left her. Allow yourself son for once in your life be happy and in love."

I stared into my mother's eyes and saw all the love she could ever possess shining through to me. I have seen that same look before in Brooke's eyes. I looked back over at Brooke who finally made eye contact with me and she gave me that amazing smile that I felt always was only meant for me.

"See Luke that love is in her eyes right now. Tell her Lucas before it's too late."

It's been a week since Brooke and I went to Tree Hill and it's a week before we go on our two weeks spring break in St. John. Brooke is extremely excited and we have the condo and flights booked. Everything is set and ready for us to go. It was true that all of us were doing pretty well in our classes even Rachel although her design and PR classes were meaningless, she was still doing very well. All of our teachers said that we could miss the extra week and be fine.

I had become pretty close with one of my professor who knew the condition I was in and spread the word to a few of the other professors that they actually felt pity for me. It wasn't sorry pity, it was more of a 'fuck this kid is young and doesn't deserve this.' It seemed that being in a smaller area other than New York, the people were more consoling and attentive to your needs and it was actually nice to see others be concerned about me.

I walked through the door of the house and saw Nathan and Brooke talking in the living room.

"Hey!" I said as I walked into the kitchen to grab a bottle of water.

"Oh! Can you get me one too?"

"Anything for you pretty girl." I called back out to her and I almost froze because I have never really called her that in front of other people besides my mom a few times when we were dating in high school.

I saw the look on Nate's face and lucky for me it went unnoticed by Brooke. I sat down next to Brooke, handed her, her water, and looked back over to Nate.

"What's going on?" I asked.

"Well we were talking about what we could do in St. John seeing as to how none of us have been there except Brooke."

Brooke smirked and sat upright and crossed her legs Indian style.

"There is so much we can do. There's amazing places to eat, shop, and the beaches are absolutely breathtaking. The water is an amazing shade of blue and crystal clear. I mean I really couldn't tell you what we could do seeing as to how I was a kid when I went there all those times. I am sure we can do so much and I wouldn't be surprised if there was so much more to do now then there was for me back then."

It was so great to see her face light up remembering special moments to her as a child. Like she said it was one of the last few moments that she remembers as a kid being happy with her parents.

"I think we should just show up and be surprised. I, for one, am very excited and interested in enjoying our time away in an exotic place." I said and they both looked at me like I was crazy.

"Okay dude who are you?" Nathan asked and I shook my head.

"Look this whole thing with my heart and shit is just putting things in perspective for me. I've been a completely douche bag apparently all my life and I am trying to change my ways."

Nathan's mouth dropped and Brooke was gazing at me in admiration.

"I agree!" Brooke said and turned back to Nathan.

We carried on with some more conversation and Haley came home a little later on. She began to cook dinner and like always Rachel randomly showed up. We both decided to get a beer each and we walked out in the backyard and dipped our feet in the pool.

"So how was the trip to Tree Hill?" She asked nudging me in the arm.

"You're one of Brooke's best friends. Shouldn't you know already?" I laughed at her and she rolled her eyes at me.

"Not always. Just because we talk all the time doesn't mean we talk about everything. Besides if I wasn't here for class, I was with Clay in Charlotte." She got this look on her face that I remember very well after we would have sex sometimes.

"So you and Clay. Serious?"

She let out this sigh that only Rachel can perform so casually and she shakes her head.

"I don't know. I mean we are so much alike and yet so different. He's the only guy that doesn't even flirt with other girls when he's with me." She finished the last of her beer and began to kick her feet around in the water.

I smiled.

"Rachel, it means he really likes you and you're not just some fuck on the side."

She turned towards me and gave me this look. I rolled my eyes.

"I feel like I should not even consider your advice because you know nothing about dating."

"True, but I know guys especially guys like him and me. He likes you, so if you like him whom I believe you do, hell, make it official. I know for a fact you are not fucking around behind his back and it sure as hell seems he isn't doing it either. Everyone deserves to be happy even devils like us." I twirled my finger around the rim of the can in my hand and Rachel placed her hand on the back of my shoulder.

"Well that much is true. Devils like us do deserve to be happy, it's just when a devil comes across an angel, they are just too chicken shit to spread their broken wings and give that said angel a look into their black heart."

I looked over at her and I was still so amazed to see and hear Rachel defend and speak up for Brooke. High school was torture living through their battles with each other and then all of a sudden those two became inseparable.

"Black heart, huh?"

"Pretty much now anyways. I think when you get your new heart it will bring some clarity to you."

We sat outside a little longer just the two of us and I had to admit that somewhere over the years Rachel became one of my best friends without me even realizing it. Brooke and Haley had dinner ready and we all sat around the table and enjoyed ourselves. Slowly and gradually, Haley was becoming less annoyed of Rachel and enjoying her company. It was nice and comforting being surrounded by people who care about you. I think I've always taken that for granted.

Nathan and I were on clean up duty while Rachel took the girls back to her place to show them all the neat clothes she bought in Charlotte. Nathan and I played a few video games and after I kicked his ass, he turned towards me and gave me this look.

"What?"

"You man, you." He adjusted his position on the couch next to me.

"Fuck, not you too."

"Oh so you already know what I am going to say." He smirks at me and I roll my eyes.

"Look whatever is going on between me and Brooke is going to stay just that: between me and her." I already didn't like people being in my business and honestly that may have been one of the biggest factors in our disaster break up as well.

I didn't enjoy people knowing what was going on between us, what we did or didn't do because it wasn't anybody else's fucking business. Hell, Haley and Nathan both knew the next day that Brooke had said those three little words to me and I still didn't have enough time to process any of it myself.

"Yes, I do know what you are going to say and I've already had to deal with it between Rachel and my mom. At least of all, I figured you wouldn't bring it up."

"Lucas, it's not just that, but it's just….you called her pretty girl? Pet names…really?"

"I gave it to her back in high school, long before we ever even dated."

"I didn't know that."

I turned to look at him and I really wanted to just punch something or even him.

"I know and I actually enjoyed that. Look, Nate you of all people should know I like to keep my personal life private and I don't know, I feel like with everything that has been happening and Brooke…I just really want people to stop telling me what I should or shouldn't do when it comes to her and my feelings." I don't know why I was getting so upset with him about this, but I guess it's because I really don't know what I should do and bottom line, I really didn't want anyone to know about our business.

"I know, Luke, I do, but like you said with everything that has been happening. I would just hate for you not to tell her how you really feel and maybe, just maybe something happens or goes wrong and she was never able to hear the truth." He patted me on the back lightly and got up and walked away.

I slivered back into the couch and heard the door open and slam shut. I peaked over the couch and saw a stumbling Brooke.

"Brooke?"

"Sssh." She held her finger to her lips as she let out a little squeak.

"What are you doing?" I said with a small smile as I got up to face her.

"Well, Rachel made us some shots and let's just say we turned it into a drinking game."

"So you walked home!" I was a little upset that she would be so careless and especially when it was dark outside.

"Nathan!" I called out and he came into view.

"Go get Haley from Rachel's." I said to him and he walked over to Brooke and shook his head.

"Silly girls."

After Nathan left, I went towards Brooke and she ran away from me.

"Pretty girl, you are playing a dangerous game." I chased after her as she ran out into the backyard.

I was a little concerned that she may fall in but I would be able to help her if it were to happen.

"Come on Lukie! Where's your sense of adventure."

Before I could reply she threw one of the beach balls at me.

"You're dead." I chased her around the pool and wrapped my arms around her and tossed us both into the pool.

It became a war as we splashed each other and she was laughing like I haven't heard in a long time. Was she actually happy? Was I part of the reason for that?

* * *

><p>I woke up with a pounding in my head and when I turned towards my bedside table. There was a glass of water with two Advil and a note.<p>

_You drink too much. Take these and feel better. –Lucas_

I rolled my eyes at his comment and did as the note said. Rachel and I were taking the day off from school and work and going shopping. We both wanted to get a few new swimsuits and clothes for our trip. It was amazing at how excited I was for this. I have been trying my best to not think about Lucas's heart, but it was always there. I also tried not to think about the fact that he still has never uttered those three little words to me.

"What's on your mind buttercup?"

I was looking through some racks of bathing suits when Rachel noticed something was bothering me.

"Lucas." I let out a sigh and she giggled.

"Of course. Isn't it always?" She rolled her eyes making me roll my eyes.

"I just…this whole thing with his heart. I am trying my best to not think about it but it is constantly eating away at me." I looked up from the racks to find Rachel leaning against another.

"Yeah, I think about it too. Lucas will be fine, you have to believe and feel that or else it will eat away at you until there is nothing left."

I shook my head trying to take her advice but this is Lucas we are talking about. If it were anyone else…maybe I could do that…but it was Lucas and I couldn't just stop.

"I think I am going to get this."

I turned to look at the ridiculous amount of clothing or lack thereof, of lingerie she held up. I had failed to realize that we had left the clothing store and were now in one of the naughty stores.

"Ew!" I said as I saw the holes in certain areas of the outfit.

"I'm getting it!"

I dropped my mouth as that was the obvious reaction she wanted from me. Clay was like a brother and picturing let alone know that those two were sleeping together grossed me out.

We left the store after about another twenty minutes and Rachel told me a funny story that happened in Charlotte. We pulled up to my house and I immediately recognized the person sitting outside my house.

"Hey Brooke."

Rachel and I both stared at the person addressing me and my face fell a little.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Rachel hissed.

"I was in the area."

Rachel rolled her eyes.

"Hey." I said noticing the small circles under his eyes.

Rachel rolled her eyes yet again.

"I am going to go inside and get a drink, B, you want one?"

I shook my head, handed her my keys and she walked inside.

"How-how are you?" He asked and there was just something off about him.

"I'm great." I started walking around to the back of the house so we could sit on the patio, he followed and sat next to me on one of the benches.

"You look great too." He said as he brushed the hair from my face and I turned away from him.

"I'm sorry."

"No, its fine, I mean it's not, but what do you want?" I was still bitter and upset with him after everything he put me through.

"Brooke, I am sorry." This was an apology for how things ended between us that I could tell.

"Chase what do you want?" I looked over at him and he had this bitter grin on his face.

"Nothing, I just wanted to see you and say hey."

"Well, you know you try to show off your little blonde friend in front of me that night at the restaurant about a month ago and you don't even really talk to me or try to talk to me at all after that and now you look like shit and I don't know what else to say."

"I know and I'm sorry. How's Lucas?"

I let out a sigh and even though I have desperately wanted to be with Lucas in every way, shape, and form, Chase still had an affect on me.

"He's good."

"I miss you." He brushed his fingers against my arm and it sent a shiver down my spine.

That feeling I used to get with him was coming back to me and I didn't like the way it was making me feel.

"Stop it Chase." I said wanting to run away but something was holding me back.

"That girl meant nothing to me…but I've always thought about you…I still do…I was so wrong and stupid to ever let you go."

Was this really happening? Was he about to kiss me and was I going to let him? I could only picture the way things used to be between Chase and me and they were good but there was also some bad ones…

"Brooke…" His lips brush against mine and before I can even say anything or do anything to stop this situation, a voice clears and I freeze in position.

I only hope and pray that it was Rachel and nobody else. I turn to find Nathan and Lucas glaring at us both. Lucas gripped the basketball in his hands tightly and walked past us to the court. I watched him as he never once looked at me or looked back at us.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Nathan asked Chase.

"I came here to see Brooke, Nate." Chase stood up and I instantly became dizzy. I couldn't take my eyes off of Lucas.

"You've got some nerve Adams showing up here after what you put her through." Nathan said as he poked Chase in the chest.

"Yeah well why isn't her boyfriend over there doing something about it? It seems he doesn't care at all about her."

"Because he's not my boyfriend." I said still with my eyes on Lucas as he put his headphones on and started playing ball.

"Chase I think you should leave." I said.

"Brooke, I want us to talk."

"Leave Adams before my fist goes through your face." Nathan threatened him and Chase smirked.

"Whatever Scott…I don't want to fight you, I am only here for Brooke. We should really talk Brooke." He said and I waved him off as I wanted to run over to Lucas and explain what he saw which meant nothing to me.

"Go home, Chase." I started walking towards Lucas and my heart started to clench as Lucas never once looked at me.

The ball went into the hoop and bounced towards me and still not even looking at me, I beat him to the ball, and held it away from him. He removed one of the ear buds and held out his hand.

"Give me the ball, Brooke."

I stepped back from him, ball in hand, and glared at him.

"No."

"Brooke." He warned me.

"Not until you talk to me." I said tightening my grip around the ball.

"About what?" He said this time a little more coolly.

"About what you saw."

"What I saw is none of my business. So please give me the ball." He reached out to me and just the Lucas I've always known, he is closing himself off and not wanting to talk about it.

"No!" I demanded.

"Brooke, give me the ball or I will remove it from you." He warned again and I wasn't scared of him.

"NO! We are going to talk about this!"

"Brooke, damn it, there is nothing to talk about! If you want to get back with Chase that's fucking fine. I really don't give a flying fuck! We're not dating therefore you have nothing to apologize for or discuss with me, because if I remember correctly like I said we are not dating. We're friends remember?" His voice was coated in bitterness and cruelty.

Tears started to fill in my eyes and I threw the ball forcefully into his chest.

"You're right! You are always fucking right Luke! But just a little FYI, I didn't invite Chase over here and I definitely did not want him to kiss me nor did I enjoy it!" I stormed away from him as the tears finally fell from my face.

* * *

><p><strong>Thoughts? Reviews are awesome! xoxo<strong>


	13. Paradise

**OMG! It has been so long and I am truly sorry for the long awaited update! So much has happened, I've got roommates now that keep me busy and I work longer hours now! So I tried to put together what I could for an update for one of my stories! So here ya go! Thanks again to those who have been concerned and checking in on me****!**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 13: Paradise<br>**

I dropped my large, oversized suitcase on the sidewalk and pulled my shades over my eyes to hide my face. It's been a week since Lucas and I argued about Chase, it's been three days since I spoke even a word to him, and now was the day that we headed to the airport to fly into Miami, then board a plane to St. Thomas.

"Are you okay, Tigger?" Haley's soft hand clutched my arm and I smiled at her.

"Yeah." I sighed.

Haley was about to speak when Lucas stepped outside and placed his duffle bag in the trunk. Without saying anything to me or Haley, he started loading Haley's luggage and then mine. He was moving gracefully as he did it. He treated our belongings as if it were a small child. Nathan came out next carrying his suitcase behind him.

"Okay, does everyone have what they need? We're going to be gone for two weeks so whatever you need you better have it with you." He said pointing to all of us as if we were his children and he refused to turn the car around if we forgot something.

We all looked and checked everything.

"Looks like we're solid." Haley chimed.

Nathan nodded and turned around to lock the door. Rachel and Clay were going to meet us at the airport as Clay's house was closer. Peyton got the job in Atlanta and said she would come after the first week to check the house and make sure everything is safe and secure.

Before I could even call shotgun to force Haley to sit in the back with Lucas, she beat me to it. I heard Lucas grunt a little and I rolled my eyes. We haven't really spoken to each other since that day and the only time we did was to decide on which takeout we wanted while Nathan and Haley did date night.

It really irritated me that Lucas was being this way but had he ever really changed? Or did I just want to believe that he did? I got into the backseat and sat next to Lucas whose arm grazed mine and this shiver coursed through my body. I saw him adjust his position and he moved away from me just a little.

I turned to look out the window.

"Is everybody excited?" Nathan asked as he turned to look at us in the back.

"Yeah." Lucas and I said together and it didn't sound very enthusiastic.

Nathan shook his head and started driving towards the airport. It was then that I also realized that I would have to sit next to Lucas on both flights. I rolled my eyes and slouched down in my seat.

Once we arrived at the airport. I reached for my suitcase and Lucas grabbed it for me still not saying anything to me. I watched him as he slung his duffle over his shoulder and my suitcase rolled behind him. He was giving me migraines at his bipolar attitude towards me.

I was about to say something snarky towards him and take my suitcase back but a large hand gripped my arm tightly stopping me.

"Let him do it."

I turned to face Nathan.

"I know that you two aren't really talking since the whole Chase thing, but in his weird way this is him apologizing and I know it's not right or fair, but Brooke just let it be." Nathan was pleading with me and he usually never does this especially when it concerns Lucas.

I know that ever since that disastrous day with Chase, Nathan and Lucas have been spending a lot more time together. Maybe Lucas has confided in Nathan about something and that scared me a little.

The flight wasn't that bad as it was around an hour long. Once in Miami we boarded another flight and we were on our way to the Virgin Islands. Lucas was nice enough to give me the window seat this time and he did it without hesitation. I thought he would be mean and take it as he walked in front of me towards our seats, but he paused and turned his body so I could scoot into the window seat.

I stared out into the blue skies that resembled the shade of his eyes. My lids started to flutter shut as I began to notice just how tired I was. I waited until the last minute to pack everything and the excitement was too much for me so Haley and I stayed up, watched some movies, and cleaned the house. I rested my head against the wall of the plane and just like that, lights out for me.

I felt something nudge me and when I opened my eyes, Lucas was close to me.

"Brooke, look outside your window." He whispered calmly.

With drawn lids still heavy, I twisted my face to look out and I immediately sat erect.

The beautiful islands were coming into view and my heart began to flutter. I was feeling like that little girl I used to be all those years ago when we would arrive.

"Lucas, come look!" I said without looking at him and he leaned over against my back with his head barely above my shoulder.

I couldn't see his face but I felt like he was observing mine more so than the view.

"It's beautiful. I can't wait to explore them." He said and I finally turned to look at him.

His blue eyes were nearly a shade of navy as it was a sign he's had a rough couple of days including lack of sleep just like me. But just for a moment we locked eyes until the voice over came on.

"_Please fasten your seatbelts as we are getting ready to land in St. Thomas. I hope you've enjoyed your flight and have a great stay."_

I checked my belt and leaned back into the seat and gripped the armrests gently. It was always landing that I feared and like instinct, Lucas rested his hand on top of mine for reassurance.

The plane started getting lower and lower and if you looked out the window, it almost seemed like we were going straight for the water which always took my breath away and scared me, but just like that, we were on solid ground as the plane finally came to a halt.

I looked up over the seats in front of me to find a grinning Haley nearly about to explode. Clay and Rachel a little ahead of them were making out, of course. I turned to Lucas and he was looking away from me staring down the aisle, waiting for the stewardess to tell us we can unfasten our seatbelts.

Déjà vu, a stewardess who I assume has been flirting with Lucas the whole time I was asleep walked by and bent down in front of him.

"I'm Cassie, here's my number. I'm stationed in Durham, so you should give me a call."

And like the cad Luke is, his eyes travel towards her breasts and he takes a sharp intake of breath.

"Hmm…sounds delicious." He winked at her and Cassie turned towards me and gave me a sour smile while I gave her my brightest one.

Cassie walked away and the seatbelt light turned off and bodies started moving. A kid around the age of eighteen started walking back towards the restrooms and Lucas stopped him.

"Hey kid. You see that blonde stewardess up there."

The guy looked towards the front of the plane where the girl winked at Lucas, but the kid thought it was for him.

"Yeah, she's hot."

Lucas leaned closer to him and handed him the napkin.

"She wanted me to give this to you." Lucas this time winked at the kid and his face went huge.

"Really?"

"Yeah, just play it cool, act like you don't know anything and she'll be eating out the palm of your hand."

I thought the gesture was funny and sweet, but claiming that a woman will eat out of the palm of your hand, well, that was the cad Lucas.

"Thanks man."

The two guys did a fist bump and Lucas stood up and started gathering our carry-ons. He still never once looked at me but helped me with my bags and reached for my hand to lead me down the cramped aisle of the people out of the plane. Haley, Nathan, Rachel, and Clay waited on us in the gate exit and we proceeded to Baggage Claim. Again, I watched Lucas and after he gathered his bag and I proceeded towards mine, he would hurry in front of me and reach for it instead. I wanted to scream at him, shake him, and say what the fuck? But I bit my tongue and let him do whatever the hell it is he wanted to do.

I walked alongside Rachel and Haley as we acted like three kids waiting to go inside the candy store.

"Get ready, you'll need your shades." I said as we reached the doors to release us to the intoxicating air of the islands.

I was the first to exit and I took in a deep breath and filled my lungs with the island air. I flagged down a van.

"Where to Miss?" The island accent excited me.

"We need to get to the ferry to St. John." I said and he smiled.

"Ah, the most tranquil island. Let's get you packed in."

The guys helped the driver load our luggage which was a task considering we still needed places to sit ourselves. Clay and Rachel got in first followed by Nathan and Haley and Lucas got in as well and I was left with the passenger seat. We started leaving the airport and driving through the streets of St. Thomas.

"So any of you ever been here?"

"I have when I was a child. We're all here on vacation." I made very clear as we all looked out the windows to take in our surroundings.

"Well it must be exciting being back here."

"Extremely exciting. This was always like my greatest escape from reality. These islands are beautiful." I said.

"They are indeed and St. John tends to be the one that everyone really enjoys. It's smaller and peaceful."

Ah, peaceful, I can not wait to get there and enjoy the tranquility.

"How long have you lived here?" Nathan asked the driver.

"Well I was born in St. Croix, but moved to St. Thomas when I was eight and been living my life here ever since. These islands are amazing and you can find the beauty in everything."

I gazed at the different shades of people walking the streets enjoying themselves and I couldn't wait to be doing that myself. I happen to look in the rear view mirror and found Luke's eyes burning holes through me.

We finally made it to the dock and we unloaded everything.

"Thank you so much for the drive." I paid the man and included a large tip.

"Thank you missus. I hope your stay here is what you remembered and so much more." He nodded towards me and I smiled.

I walked with Nathan to the ticket line and the next ferry was leaving in ten minutes. We got six tickets and waited. Haley and Rachel sat off the dock with their feet dangling in the water and I started taking photos. I love taking pictures; it was one of my guilty pleasures. Lucas and Nathan were talking about basketball when Clay walked up to me.

"How ya doing Penny?"

I rolled my eyes at the horrendous nickname.

"Good. You?"

"Oh, I'm fantastic. We're here and I am already having a great time."

He stood next to me as I took a picture of Haley and Rachel laughing together.

"These islands must have some magic to it. Seeing those two laughing together. Scary."

I chuckled at Clay's comment and it was true, those two laughing, together? Need proof. I took another photo of the two valuable women in my life and turned my camera around to see Lucas standing alone staring out into the depths of the sea. His hand was over his heart and I took a photo. The caption would read, 'Lost' and that's exactly what Lucas Scott was: lost. Even thought there was a part of me that despised him for his past behavior and his current mood swings, I am always constantly worried about him.

I was going to walk towards him but the bell rang that notified us, our ferry was ready to be docked. We all gathered our belongings and started boarding the boat. Almost forgetting that I was not alone on this trip, I immediately climbed the steps to the open seating of the ferry. I dragged my suitcase up behind me and found the spot I remember sitting in when I was a kid. The boats were the same just as I remembered them.

Everybody else joined me and found their seat and we waited for everyone else to board the boat. Once all passengers were on board, the small boat came to life and started towards our destination. I stood up to stand slightly over the railing and watch the island of St. Thomas slowly get smaller behind us.

I notice someone move closer to me and lean over the railing a little as well and I instantly knew it was Lucas. Yet again, he doesn't say a word. I feel him and I can smell him. Why was everything so intoxicating and invigorating about him? All he does is make me feel bad or angry. I never once looked at him and I kept my eyes glued to the island getting closer to us. I could feel the calming vibe irradiate towards me.

"Wow, it's so beautiful out here." I heard Haley coo.

I smiled to myself. I was about to share something special with the people who meant the world to me. The ferry pulled towards the dock and the men started tying the boat safely to it.

We all began gathering our stuff and again without saying a word, Lucas grabs my luggage and wheels it behind him. Nathan gives me a weak smile and I roll my eyes at him, frustrated with both of them. All the passengers started unloading and scattering from the boat onto the dock going separate ways to get to their destinations to drop their things off and head straight to the beach.

It's like I was here yesterday. As you walked down the dock, to your right was the little old food shack that sold some of the best hot dogs I've ever had in this world. To my left was the pier where some of the local kids were fishing. Ahead of us was the restaurant that always had the chickens walking around the front of the restaurant that had really great French fries. Yes, this was paradise and the greatest escape in the world.

I hurried towards one of the trolleys and signaled for the rest of my crew to come along. We all cramped ourselves and our luggage into the car as I told the driver to take us to the nearest car rental. I stared out into the exotic colors of the island as everything was rushing back to me about this place. Once we were there, Clay and Nathan collected the keys and we were given two Jeeps. Obvious choice for this island. I knew exactly where we were going so I got into the red Jeep as Lucas and Haley got in with me. Clay, Rachel, and Nathan got into the white Jeep.

"Follow me!" I shouted out.

"Like we have any other choice." Clay crooned and I stuck my tongue out at him.

I started driving away from the town and my whole body jolted with excitement as we were making our destination up the side of the island.

Haley gasped in the backseat as she stared with bewilderment at her surroundings. We were basically driving on a narrow road on the side of the mountain. You could look straight down and see the ocean and the beautiful sandy beaches.

It was like we were driving through the jungle and that was something I loved about this place. It kept to its natural roots. It didn't industrialize, it was natural the way it was meant to be. A little further along, we ran into some goats and a huge snake. I had to remind Haley that we would probably see a lot of snakes, mongooses, and of course, the one thing I could not stand was iguanas.

"Like in the house?" Haley's eyes grew wide.

"No, well, possibly, but definitely around the house. I mean Hales, you do realize we are in the Caribbean surrounded by nature."

Haley chuckled nervously and it made me giggle and I finally caught sight of Lucas who was also grinning but kept his eyes on the road.

"Okay here we are!" I said as I pulled into a secluded driveway.

"This is absolutely amazing!" Haley said.

"Holy shit!" I heard Rachel squeal.

We parked the two Jeeps in front of the condo and to our left was a swimming pool with a Jacuzzi.

"You haven't seen the best part yet, come on!" I took the keys out of the mailbox.

"They just leave keys in mailboxes?" Clay asked.

"There is hardly any crime here if any at all and besides, it's a family friend's condo, he knew we were coming." I placed the key inside the door and opened it.

Once we were inside, we were in the common room with large open windows and bamboo ceiling fans. The kitchen was the size of my bedroom back home.

"Okay, Nathan and Haley get the master over there. Clay and Rachel, you have the bedroom downstairs and…." I realized that Lucas and I had planned to share a room because well, the other four weren't going to share with anyone else, but things right now were just strained between Lucas and me.

"We have the basement apartment with the best view." I said to Lucas and he nodded as he continued to look around.

The condo was technically three stories, but with an in ground basement apartment with glass sliding doors that lead to the beauty of the island.

"Oh my God!"

Rachel had made her way out to the balcony and the rest of us joined her. The yard was covered in Hibiscus plants in all different colors with the ocean in the background with St. Croix in the distance.

"Brooke, thank you! This place is absolutely amazing." Rachel said as everyone else chimed in with their gratitude except Lucas.

"Come on." I said to him.

He took his luggage and mine…again…in his hands and we proceeded down the steps of the balcony. We went under a covered area.

"What is that?" He asked speaking for the first time.

"It's our shower." I blushed.

It was an outside shower with a stone pathway and a waterfall shower head. It was beautiful but did leave you feeling a little exposed.

"Hmm..interesting." He walked further and stopped.

I walked up beside him as his eyes went huge.

The view I was telling him about. Yes, the field of hibiscuses was beautiful, but what we saw was a path that leads down the side of the island towards a secluded beach and the coconut trees with the birds and stoned pathway was just magnificent.

"This _is_ amazing." He said.

"Yeah when I was little and my parents were either arguing or not really paying me any attention, I would sneak out here and go all the way down the trail. Maybe I'll take you with me and show you where I went." I walked away from him and towards our room.

I opened the glass doors and walked inside. Tommy, the owner and close friend, already had the beds made and the A/C running. There was a large king bed in the middle of the room with couches on both sides and a huge wall length closet behind the bed. To the left wall was the bathroom with a garden tub that led to the shower outside.

I watched as Lucas walked further into the room and placed our luggage inside the closet. He looked over at me and we made eye contact.

"This is nice, thank you." He said.

As I was about to speak again, Rachel barged into our room wearing nothing but a copper colored two piece.

"Let's go Broody and Cheery. Beach time!"

I shot her a look that told her I was pissed for interrupting our moment.

"Correction, Broody and Bitchy." She hurried off and I turned towards Lucas who was out of sight.

He snuck off to the bathroom to change and I figured I would change in the walk in closet. I decided to wear one of my new two pieces. It was black, Lucas's favorite color with an intricate cobalt blue design that matched the color of his eyes. I grabbed two towels for us and walked out of the closet.

The moment I walked out, I bumped into Lucas. His hands held the small of my back gently, yet roughly. His hands were rough but he could have the tenderest touch to him. I looked up into his eyes and he was staring back into mine. No matter what has happened this past week, I still had the same rush of feeling to just kiss him.

"You look nice." He said as he released me from his arms.

I didn't want him to let me go. I followed him out of the room and up the stairs by the pool and Haley, Nathan, Rachel, and Clay were all waiting for us.

"So Brooke Davis, which beach are we going to?" Clay asked and I didn't even have to think about it.

"Trunk Bay."

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><p><strong>This is definitely an introduction to the island and their trip! Hope it was good! Thoughts? Review please! <strong>


	14. Wet and Dream

**A/N: i am slowly starting to come back with updates! I am sorry that it has been taking me awhile...I hope you are all still out there reading and remembering! lol...anyways...I have a new one shot up! It's called In My Veins...if you haven't already read it!** **Thanks! Also I was feeling dirty so there's some juiciness in this chapter! ENJOY!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 14: Wet and Dream<strong>

I loved that was I able to do most of the driving while we were here. Even though I haven't been here in over ten years, it was like it never left me. We were driving down the narrow roads on the side of the island that every time you weren't sure if the road continued or not.

Of course, we finally found the sign that said Trunk Bay, we pulled in and parked. We gathered all of our stuff we would need for the beach.

"This is interesting." Haley said and that word was one to describe the island.

To get to the beach, you had to walk through the jungle just a little bit. It wasn't really _the_ jungle but it wasn't like a forest either. There were coconut trees everywhere as we took the sandy trail towards the beach. Little creatures mainly mongooses and iguanas I warned them about were along the path.

There was a little shack off to the side that resided as bathrooms. As we walked further, a small little bungalow that served food came into view.

"Wow, they have a food joint here too? This is getting more and more perfect." Nathan said as he caught a glimpse at the handwritten menu on the blackboard.

Then a little clearing came to view and as we stepped through it, the beach and all its wonders were open to us. I heard everyone gasp including myself at the magnificence of this place. The water was crystal clear shades of green and blue. The sand was almost like silk as you dug your toes in it and the beach went on forever.

"Wow, see now I could get used to this everyday for the rest of my life." Clay dropped his and Rachel's things on the sand.

"Yeah, this is pretty great." Rachel said still in shock.

I looked over at Lucas as he looked peaceful. This is where he wanted to be: the sounds of the ocean waves, the wind blowing delicately in the background, and the light laughters of others around us.

We all took our places along the beach. About an hour went by and nobody said a word. It was nice. We all were just relaxing and enjoying ourselves. Haley had fallen asleep as Nathan and Clay began to carry on a conversation about basketball. Rachel was sunbathing and Lucas…he was reading a book never taking his eyes off of it for a second.

I, on the other hand, was sunbathing as well, but found myself staring, no, observing him. I had hoped he knew I was watching him, but if he did, I didn't notice.

"I think we are going to grab something to eat from that little shack. Does anybody want anything?" Nathan started brushing the sand from his swim shorts as Clay and Rachel started getting up as well.

"A chili cheese dog, please, they have some of the best ones, if I remember right." I said smiling up at Nathan.

"Make that two and I really want a Coke." Lucas said never letting his eyes leave the book, at least, he's alert to everyone else.

"Oh, a Coke does sound good." I chimed in.

"Okay two dogs and two Cokes. You coming with?" He turned to Clay and Rachel.

"I think I am going to walk down the beach some." Clay said.

"Hmm…I want to as well." Haley finally woke up and adjusting her eyes to the sun.

"I'll go with ya, Nathan, I am feeling like a fatty today." Rachel stood by Nathan.

It was odd. Haley kissed Nathan and smiled at Clay as she started to walk with him down the beach. Rachel said something that made Nathan laugh. Seeing those opposites walk off together, this island brings out the bizarre, but it also made me smile to myself. For Haley to always be irritated or uncomfortable with Rachel alone with Nathan, she just acted like she didn't care. Clay and Haley don't spend too much time together, but there they go off together exploring the beach.

"What are you smiling about, pretty girl?"

I closed my eyes as he still called me that precious name. Was the island beginning to work magic on Lucas as well? I turned to look at him as it seemed he still hadn't pulled his nose out of this book. How could he have known I was smiling?

"I am just so grateful we're here. I feel like it's helping all of us. I mean did you see how Haley didn't care at all that Rachel was going off with Nathan? And Haley and Clay? I don't think I've ever seen those two speak to each other alone, and now they are just walking down the beach together. I love it." I rolled onto my stomach and grabbed my brand new issue of Vogue and turned the page.

"Yes, it is…bizarre and nice. I am finding this to be very relaxing. My heart shouldn't explode or crap out on me here."

The tone in his voice as he said those words made me jump. I pulled my glasses from my eyes and glared at him.

"Don't say things like that." I scolded him for the first time since the Chase thing.

"It was a joke."

"Don't joke like that!" I demanded of him and turned away from him giving him my backside.

I couldn't believe him. I was angry and frustrated as I slammed my magazine on my towel and started walking towards the beach. I let my toes take a dip into the clear water and it felt amazing. I started to wade in deeper and deeper until the water was at my neck and I started to swim around a bit. I looked towards the beach and this time, Lucas had put his book down and he was watching me. I smirked and turned away from my view of him.

I finally submerged all the way and swam through the water. I resurfaced and Lucas was gone from the beach.

"This feels great." He was by me before I knew it.

"Yeah it is." I said not looking at him.

His hand brushed against my leg as we were both treading in the water. The waves brought me a little closer to him. Even in the saltwater, I could smell his scent.

"I am sorry." He said as he choked on the last word.

I scoffed at him.

"For what?" I looked back towards the beach and no one else was back yet.

"For the comment I made. I didn't want to upset you by it."

A part of me was a little disappointed that he wasn't apologizing for last week.

"It's okay." I said as I started to get out but he reached for my waist and stopped me.

"I don't want to upset you, Brooke especially while we're here." He said rubbing his hand along my flat stomach.

"Then don't." I said as I swam away from him and started back to our camped out area.

I didn't bother to wipe the sea away from me as it would help with the tan. I lied back down and let the rays beat across my skin. It felt refreshing. I heard someone coming back and I assumed it was Lucas until I smelled the most amazing aroma.

"One greasy, sloppy coney for ya." Rachel sat down next to me and I opened my eyes.

"Oh my God, it smells fanstastic." I took the dog from her and started munching on it. Best decision today ever!

"Why is Lucas sitting along the water?" Rachel nodded forwards in front of us.

"I don't know."

Rachel called out to Luke and waved his bag back and forth.

"Man that burger was awesome." Nathan sat on the other side of me.

"Yeah we got some fantastic islan' cookn' herr." I said in my island accent and they both laughed at me.

Lucas made his way back and sat beside Rachel, thanking her for the food and eating it before I had finished mine.

"Now to complete this meal with a bottled Coke." Bottled Coke was the best. Nathan popped the top off and handed me the glass bottle.

So refreshing. Everything about this place was refreshing.

Lucas and I finished our food and the four of us sat in silence looking out to the ocean.

"How's the water?"

"Perfect." Lucas and I said together.

"Great!" Nathan said as he got up and Rachel followed him.

They began to have a water fight and I smiled. I saw out of the corner of my eye, Clay charging towards them and dive in, picking up Rachel and slinging her further into the water. Haley skipped towards Nathan who pulled her into his arms. They were all so in love that it made me sad that I couldn't have that. I flinched at the feeling and Lucas didn't say or do anything.

We had spent five hours at the beach as it started to get dark. We decided to cook at the house tonight and go out another night seeing as we had thirteen more nights left. Nathan and Haley decided to go the store and I made the directions as simple as I could. You only make one turn. They left and Clay and Rachel were cuddled together in the hammock on the patio. Rachel giggled and I've never heard her giggle before. It was nice to hear.

I wasn't sure where Lucas disappeared to; maybe he was in our room or in the main part of the house. I was still standing in the driveway looking where Haley and Nathan just left and then turning to hear Rachel laugh again at something Clay said. I headed back to our room and noticed the lights were off, maybe Lucas was upstairs. I opened one of the glass doors and went to turn on one of the lamps. I walked up the bed and Lucas had passed out on his stomach sleeping. I could hear his steady breathing. I tiptoed towards the closet, stepped inside and pulled out a pair of shorts and tank. I walked out of the closet and heard Lucas groan in his sleep. It was one of the cutest sounds I'd ever heard.

I sat on the edge of the bed to charge my cell phone when I felt a shift towards me. Lucas had his arm around me pulling me closer to him. I wasn't sure if he was aware of what he was doing or just doing it out of instinct. I didn't resist him as he buried his face into the crook of my neck inhaling my scent. I was mad at him still, no frustrated and disappointed with him but I wanted to be near him. I couldn't help it, I never could as I always craved him.

I started drifting into a deep sleep.

"_What are you thinking about?" _

_We just got done having amazing sex. It was my first time and he seemed to enjoy himself pretty well and I had to admit that I loved every moment of it. I turned to look back at him._

"_I am glad I did this." I said wrapping my arm around his that held me against him._

"_Me too. Is it what you expected? Was it okay?" He seemed nervous. He seemed like this was his first time and he wanted my approval. _

_I turned in his arms so that I was facing him and brushed my fingers across his face._

"_It was everything and more. I have never been so happy in my life…were you…I mean was I okay?" I bit my lip anxiously awaiting his reply…that it scared me._

_His face changed and he ran his hand from my knee up my thigh across my stomach, between my breasts, and rested on my cheek._

"_Pretty girl, you were amazing, really. Although you do realize that if we continue to do this, I can teach you a few things, I mean practice is always good even for me." He leaned in and kissed me wildly. _

_It made my center ache for him. Never did I know my body could react this way to another person. Lucas drove my body crazy leaving me wondering if I had any control over it. He rolled on top of me and his dick became hard against my abdomen and I inhaled sharply as I loved that feeling._

"_Ready for round two?" He questioned me. _

"_Please." I hissed as he bit my ear which I was beginning to learn was one of my favorite things. _

_His hands started to roam my body and I was learning that my body responded in the most passionate way to his touch. I reached down and started rubbing my hand up and down his dick and he did his best to control himself from exploding. I could not believe I had this effect on him. _

"_Stop or else you are going to ruin this for me." He removed my hand and brought my hands together clasped above my head. _

_I had to admit I loved it when he took charge, made me **his**. With his free hand, he let it run down my stomach and rest on my hip as I bucked forward. Then he slowly inserted his dick inside of me and I couldn't help the jolt that coursed through my body. I leaned forward desperately wanting to kiss him but he pulled back as he thrust in and out of me. It was driving me crazy._

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><p>"Let me touch you please."<p>

Was somebody talking to me? I opened one eye and realized I was in the bed with Brooke. I looked over at the bedside clock over her and it read eight thirty. Damn did we really sleep almost two hours? I wonder if we missed dinner.

"Please." She murmured in her sleep.

It only made me think about the time we first had sex or well the second time. She was begging me to let her touch me but I held her hands together preventing her from doing so. Was she dreaming about that moment? Would it be rude and selfish of me to help bring her dream to reality? I wanted to touch her and be inside of her so badly. She turned in my arms and bucked against my hips and I couldn't help myself…

I let my hand glide from her neck down her arm and rest on her hip. She moaned in her sleep. The heat radiating from her body made me restless and my dick grew hard.

"Please." She begged in her sleep and I couldn't resist or deny her.

I let my hand slip into her shorts and I found her hot, extremely wet center that was begging to be touched. I watched her face as it contorted into pleasure and she surprised me as she brought her hand to mine in her pants forcing it to move. I did as she requested. I let my palm rub against her pussy slowly and then I increased my speed. I pushed her panties to the side and let my thumb run across her clit and her whole body shivered as she moaned again.

"Lucas."

So she was dreaming about me and my touch. She was breathing hard and I let a finger slid inside her pulling it in and out roughly and then slipping in another finger and she shuddered and clasped her fingers through my hair yanking me towards her. I let my face get lost in between her breasts. I buried my face down in her shirt letting my tongue enjoy her taste.

"Don't stop." She bucked in my hand as she rode my fingers.

She was unbelievably sexy even if she was still asleep. I was going to kiss her…

"Holy fuck! I am…shit!" The red head froze and instead of moving, she just stood there.

"Rachel, get the fuck out!" I yelled at her and Brooke finally came alert on what was going on.

"RACHEL!" She screamed as I still had my fingers inside of her.

Brooke moved closer to me to hide our situation but Rachel wasn't a fool.

"Finish her off Luke. Dinner will be ready in about ten minutes." She winked at us.

"Give it to her hard." She yelled out as she closed the door and was out of sight.

I knew what was coming; she was going to scream at me, scold me for taking advantage of her again in her sleep. When I looked at her face, I couldn't read her expression. Then she started moving. Did she want me to finish? Her hips started moving in a slow motion. Her eyes were closed.

"Brooke?"

"Finish." She demanded.

I did as she asked. I let my fingers work magic on her as she wiggled and purred my name. God, I loved it when she would say my name like that.

"Fuck, Luke, I'm…I'm…" She screamed as her juices flooded my fingers.

She was panting and I went to kiss her but she rolled over and walked into the bathroom. What the fuck just happened? I sat up on my elbows and waited. Now I had a hard on and got the feeling I would not be reciprocated. She knew what I did was wrong and she was going to punish me for it. I heard the tub cut on and just imagining her naked in the next room, I had to take care of this. I was hoping she would be in there for awhile and if not, she could walk out and watch me. I heard her splash in the tub and I imagined being in there with her.

I put my hand down my pants and lay back on the bed as I let my hand work on my dick. _Fuck_, I wanted it to be her so bad, but this is what I get. My hand was going at speeds that my brain couldn't comprehend. The only thing on my mind was Brooke.

"Fuck." I groaned.

I heard the door open and I knew I had an audience. I was doing this for her. I was going to finish myself off while she watched which used to be something I enjoyed. I loved it when she would watch and I knew it was one of her guilty pleasures as well.

"Brooke." I breathed. I wanted her to know she was doing this to me. She had this effect on me.

I reached my orgasm and I let my cum squirt against my stomach. I opened my eyes to see her watching me. She had that gorgeous bottom lip in between her teeth. She walked away from the doorway towards the closet completely ignoring me.

I grabbed my shirt and wiped my stomach off and held it in place. I walked into the bathroom to clean myself up. The bathroom air filled my nose with her scent. Vanilla and jasmine was so intoxicating.

I walked to the shower and the stars were amazing. I don't think I ever saw them this much in the states. The sky was so clear here.

I let the water wash over my body. I washed my sperm away and turned the water off. I put the towel around me and walked back into the room. Brooke was gone.

I was a little disappointed because I hoped she would have stuck around to talk about it or something.

I was an ass hole. I don't think that part of me will ever change. I just remember being so angry when I saw Chase kissing Brooke. I know we're not dating or anything but it made me see red. I wanted to strangle him for touching her, kissing her. Then I did something I shouldn't have. I ignored her. Well, not really ignore her, I just didn't want to talk about it and whenever she would try and speak to me it would be about that moment.

I don't do these kinds of things. I don't talk about relationships or other men because Brooke is not my girlfriend although I've always considered her _mine_.

"Damn it." I knew what I had to do but it was something I did _**not**_want to do.

I got dressed and went upstairs. Once in the dining room, I saw Rachel and Brooke talking and I knew Rachel was giving her a hard time about what she walked in on. Brooke never looked at me or even tried to make eye contact.

"Hales, it smells delicious." I said walking over to her and kissing her on the side of her face.

"So did you finish?" Rachel asked and I shot her a look.

The three other people in the room were oblivious as Rachel, Brooke and I knew what she was referring too.

"Yeah Red I did twice."

"Ew seriously?" Haley was the first to catch on or at least say something out loud about it.

Brooke drank her glass of wine with a smirk on her face. At least she still has her sense of humor.

We had dinner and us guys bonded afterwards. I am not sure how it got to this but Clay really wanted to shave his head and all three of us ended up doing it. I haven't had a shaved head since my first year in New York. I don't think Brooke has ever seen me with a shaved head but I liked it that way. Yes it was pretty fucking lame, but I got to know Clay a little better. We talked about basketball, movies, books, and Brooke. I didn't say too much but he told me some stories they shared and it made me smile to know that Brooke found someone like that in her life when I was absent for so long.

The girls were inside drinking wine and painting their toe nails when Rachel was the first to notice us.

"What the hell did you do to your hair?" Rachel sat up immediately and stormed over to Clay and brushed her hand across his freshly shaven head.

"I needed a change. Apparently we all did." He said winking at Rachel.

"I think it's sexy." Haley said as she grinned ridiculously at Nathan.

Brooke's mouth was parted slightly and I knew…I knew she loved it.

"Luke it's a good look for you too." Haley said _for_ Brooke.

"Thanks." I smiled at her and grabbed a beer and headed back outside to sit on the patio and look out to the sea.

This place was pretty incredible. I felt so at ease here even though things were strained between Brooke and me. I heard someone walking towards me and I knew it was her.

"You care to explain why you took advantage of me while I was sleeping…again?" She sat down next to me and hugged her knees to her chest.

"Please you liked it and yet again…you were begging for it. Don't think for one second you didn't know what you were doing." I said bringing the bottle to my mouth enjoying the taste.

"Hmm." She scoffed.

"And don't think I didn't notice you enjoying yourself while I was taking care of _my_ business." I looked over at her and I saw her blush even in the moonlit sky.

We sat in silence for a moment and I saw her getting ready to speak but I growled a little bit and then turned slightly to face her.

"I don't do these things. You know that but I am apologizing for what happened last time with the Chase thing. I shouldn't have done…what I did." I drank some more of my beer and turned back to the stars as they danced along the water.

She didn't say anything. She didn't move. I wasn't sure if she was even breathing. I figured I would talk again.

"I know we're not dating and stuff but I, I, something broke my heart that day when I saw him touching you and kissing you. That should have been me." I slammed my fist against the railing of the patio. She jumped.

She still didn't say anything. This is why I don't talk about these things. It just…it makes me nervous and embarrassed thinking I said something stupid or cheesy…she definitely wasn't helping by keeping her mouth shut. I was about to take it all back…

"Thank you." She said quietly.

I face her and she still has her knees tucked in between her chest and arms. She looked so beautiful and innocent.

"You're welcome." I wasn't sure what was happening. Which part of what I just said was she thanking me for?

She got up, placed her hand on my shoulder, and walked back inside. I wanted to go after her but I know in most ways I am still screwing up. I _should_ and _need_ to keep my distance from her in that way. She is going to make this extremely difficult for me sleeping in the same bed. I turned back to the view before me. Was I ever going to be able to leave this place? It hasn't even been twenty four hours and I'm drawn in to this wonderful place.

I stayed out on the patio for the rest of the night. Haley came out there at one point and we talked about a few things and for once none of it involved Brooke. It was a relief. We talked about everything and anything and not having to talk about Brooke and my feelings felt so good.

I opened the door quietly to our room and saw her sleeping soundly in the bed. I went to the bathroom, brushed my teeth, and turned my bedside lamp on and there was a note.

_Remember Luke, baby steps. X-Brooke_

I turned to look at the most beautiful woman beside me as her chest rose up and down as she slept.

"I…goodnight Brooke." I was going to say it, let her know how I feel, but I pussied out and leaned over to kiss her on the forehead.

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><p><strong>TA DA! Yeah I know...I'm good! lol...oh well there it is! Review and leave me some great choice of words!<strong>


	15. Waterfall

**A/N: Thank you all for being patient and to those who sent me messages. I can't begin to say how sorry I am that I've been this far behind with my uploads but a lot has been happening and just when I think I have a break to sit down and write, shit happens and I find myself getting lost in other things. I've been doing a lot of reading and have been uninspired to write but I promised myself I would get a chapter in for one of my stories! I hope you are all still out there waiting to read the rest to come!**

**ENJOY! **

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><p><strong>Chapter: Waterfall<strong>

A few days had passed since the night Lucas finally opened up a bit and apologized for the Chase situation. We did a little bit of exploring across the island and I've never seen Rachel this much outdoors unless she was drinking or posing for a modeling shoot. Clay became more calm and in tune with himself. Nathan shone in a different light appreciating the nature around him. Haley began to write music again, something I haven't seen her do since high school. And Lucas…

Lucas was beginning to transform into the man I always knew he could be. He was becoming someone who appreciated everything and everyone around him. He was writing more and more everyday. As for myself, I started sketching but not only that, but actually drawing. I never really thought about anything else but fashion. I was drawing everything. Trees, beaches, sand, by passers, sunsets, and my amazing friends.

Things were just magical here and everyday was a more beautiful day than the previous one.

With my sketchpad in hand, I heard the door open and someone skipping towards me.

"Tigger!"

"Tutor girl." I pushed my sunglasses further up my face as a small sweat formed along the bridge of my nose.

"Are you drawing?" She leaned over just a little to look at my sketch.

I nodded as I bit my lip and tried to keep my focus on the blooming hibiscus in front of me.

"It's amazing Brooke, you have a unique talent for making things so much more beautiful on paper." She smiled and winked at me.

"Thanks Hales." I never thought I could draw anything else except clothing designs but I began to realize that maybe, just maybe there was more to my talent than I ever thought before.

"So Nathan and I are probably going to explore the old church ruins would you like to join us?"

I knew what Haley was doing and I really did appreciate it. I told her about what happened that night between Lucas and me and for some reason she was being extremely overprotective of both of us. She didn't want Lucas and I rushing into anything and I kept repeating myself that, that wasn't going to happen not with everything that's going on with his heart. Haley wanted us both to be happy but not for the wrong reasons and I respect that.

"I think I'll stay here and enjoy the alone time. Clay and Rachel went snorkeling. Can you believe it? Rachel in the ocean doing something besides modeling?" I snickered and Haley giggled.

"Yeah it is strange but I am actually beginning to see her in a different light. I think we are even becoming friends." She smiled and shook her head at the sure idea of those them ever becoming friends.

"Yes Hales, it is a miracle." I rested my hand on her leg and she smiled at me.

"Well you know you're not alone. Luke is inside writing…" She nodded towards the main part of the house and I followed her gaze.

"I know and we'll be okay. You know we've been alone with each other a million times Hales. You don't have to keep an eye on us."

She grabbed my hand and held it in hers. There was something different about her touch just now. It was almost as if she was comforting me even though I didn't need it.

"I just…I love you both so much and in different ways that if anything were to happen to either one of you, I think I would lose my mind. I just…I love seeing you two get close again and I think it's great that you are taking what you both like to call, 'baby steps' it's just…and I don't like thinking this but we have to be realistic here, if something bad were to happen to Lucas, I think it would kill me even more to see you get close to him like you were before to only see that be taken away from you again."

Tears started to form in my eyes and I squeezed her hand. Haley has been the only constant person in my life. Even though when we were younger, it was always Peyton and me but when Haley did come into my life, there was never any tension, strain, or stress between us. We were always able to work out our differences and stay closer than ever. I pulled her into my arms and held onto her as if she would disappear away from me.

"I love you so much Haley Bob…but just know that if something were to happen to Lucas…I would want to cherish whatever moments I can have with him, romantic or not. Yes, it would probably kill me to lose him as a friend or a lover, but my world would never be the same if he weren't in it, no matter what he is to me." I couldn't help my tears. They flowed freely and I let them.

"Oh Brookie, I didn't mean to make you cry…it's just I can't help but worry about you both…I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything." She reached up and brushed the tears away.

"It's okay, I promise. I love that you worry about me the way you do. I don't know what I'd do without you. You've become the sister, the friend I've always wanted. Thanks Hales for never turning your back on me."

We pulled each other into our arms. I don't think I could love any other girl more than I loved her.

"Whoa, I'm sorry, I didn't know I was interrupting a girly moment."

I looked over Haley's shoulder to see Nathan looking slightly uncomfortable. Haley and I both laughed and pulled away from each other.

"It's okay my charming boyfriend. We were just talking." Haley brushed the tears that now cascaded down her face away.

"Is everything okay?" He questioned and we both nodded.

"Go have fun. The church ruins are gorgeous. You two deserve a getaway with each other. If you plan on staying out late, grab a blanket for more reasons than one." I winked at them and Nathan blushed.

"Mind out of the gutter, Miss Davis, although thanks for the tip." Haley winked at me and I winked back.

"I love you." I said.

"I love you too." She said back as they walked away from me.

I caught a glare of something reflecting above me. Lucas was standing on the balcony looking down on me. The sun reflected off his sunglasses and I wish I could read his face. He disappeared back into the house and I frowned and turned back to my flower. It had bloomed fully and I was mesmerized by it. Amazing, I thought.

About an hour had gone by and I ended up drawing the entire hibiscus garden. The one flower I started drawing was the center of my piece then it became surrounded by the greenery with smaller versions of the flower accenting it. It really was good and I was proud of myself.

"That's amazing."

I jumped a little as I didn't hear him come up behind me.

"I didn't mean to scare you." He said soothingly.

"No it's okay. I guess I had gotten too wrapped up into my work, I didn't notice you came down here." I looked up at him and he didn't have his sunglasses on anymore.

I could see his face clearly now and he looked tired.

"Thank you." I whispered almost forgetting he complimented my picture.

He sat down next to me and for a moment we both enjoyed the view with the sounds of the waves crashing in the background. It truly was a wonderful place to be surrounded by.

"So with everyone else exploring, I was wondering if you wanted to join me in doing a little exploring of our own." His voice became a melody in my head. His words had never been more calm and tranquil before.

"Sure." I became excited and nervous at the same time. It was like going on a first date with the boy you've been crushing on for forever.

"Well how about we explore this amazing trail you've been telling me about?" He leaned back in his chair and I saw his chest and torso muscles stretch leaving me wanting to run my fingers down them.

"Yeah." Since when was I only able to spit out one word sentences?

I went inside to change into more appropriate attire. I put on my tennis shoes and grabbed a tank and shorts to cover my bathing suit. I quickly braided my hair into messy pigtails and grabbed one of Lucas's hats. Not cute for a date but we were going to do a little bit of hiking and walking, so no need to look cute. I grabbed my camera, just in case.

When I stepped back outside, Lucas was waiting for me. He had a small backpack and I saw him loading a couple of water bottles, towels, and snacks.

"My you seem a little over prepared." I stood resting my hands on my hips.

"Yeah, well all I know is that we're walking that trail." He pointed to the tree enclosed path that led to a mysterious place to him.

"You won't tell me anything about it and instead of letting my curiosities get the best of me; I've waited to explore it with you." He said resting the pack across his shoulder. He never looked more handsome, almost like a hero getting ready for his long-awaited journey.

"True and thanks for waiting on me. I know how you don't like waiting."

We stood awkwardly around each other for a moment and at the same time we both moved towards the trail and stopped.

"Please lead the way; I don't know where we're going." He said with a chuckle. Did he really just chuckle?

I shrugged it off, smiled at him and began walking forward. It was like it never left me. Nothing about this island ever left me. It was like I was here yesterday walking down this path that led to my escape to freedom from my distant parents when they would fight or argue about stupid, petty things. We were walking for about ten minutes when I spoke up.

"When I was younger, I would run away down this path, my parents, of course, never knowing when I'd disappear but sometimes I would stop and sit on this rock."

We stopped before a rock that looked like it was made for sitting. I sat down on the rock and pulled my knees to my chest, Lucas stood in front of me.

"I would write in my diary sometimes here, or just curl up into a ball and sit here believing that I lived a different life." I let the sad, bittersweet memories flood me.

"I'm sorry."

I snatched my head up in his direction.

"Your parents were always worthless. You never deserved to go through all the bull shit you did." He reached his hand out to me and pulled me from the rock.

I lost my footing a bit because he was so strong; it was like I was weightless to him. My feet couldn't find the right place to stay grounded as I fell a little into him.

"I know." I said into his chest.

I pushed back from him just a bit and looked up at him. Not to sound vain, but everything about him fit me perfectly. His hands against the small of my back, how his arms molded along mine and his head was perfectly taller than mine, the way it should be.

"Come on." He took my hand and began to lead me.

"Do you know where you're going?" I asked him amused.

"No, but you'll let me know if I'm heading in the wrong direction."

A memory skirted across my mind…to those familiar words he's spoken before.

"_Are you crazy?" I yelled at him. I hardly ever yell at him._

"_Relax, okay." _

_He wants me to relax? How the hell am I supposed to relax when he's told me something like this?_

"_Fuck you." I stormed away from him and heard him run towards me._

"_Whoa, calm down. What's your problem?" He looked at me confused and just for a moment I couldn't be that mad at him._

"_I just…I just can't believe you would do that! I mean…" What was I saying? _

_I just always thought that Lucas and I would experience all the firsts together…well maybe not __**all**__ the firsts, but things like this…_

"_I just…" My awkward fifteen year old self began fidgeting with my thumbs._

"_I just thought that maybe we could have done something like that together, that's all." I looked up at him and this genuine smile came across his face._

"_Brooke, you really wanted to smoke weed with me? I didn't know that. Honest to God." He reached up and brushed the hair from my face._

"_I mean yeah, no, but if you're going to do things like that, I would hope you would want to do them with me…" I sounded so ridiculous and needy right now. _

"_Well okay how about this…" His hands left my face and glided down to my arms._

"_The next time I want to experience anything for the first time, I'll come to you." He smiled at me and shook his head, "although there are some things I can't experience the first time with you." Sex, of course._

_Was he mocking me? Making fun of me now?_

"_I get the feeling you'll let me know if I'm heading in the wrong direction…if I come to you first about these things, you'll forbid me to do them." _

_I shrugged him off and looked up at him._

"_Lucas, drugs are not something I would like to get myself involved in but if I ever do, I would want to experience them with you! At least then I know if something were to go wrong, you'd be there to make sure nothing __**does **__go wrong." I hoped he understood what I was saying, what I was trying to get across to him._

_His whole body began to relax and he nodded._

"_Of course, Brooke."_

"_You're one of my best friends, or at least my best friend who I know can protect me from certain things." I am sure Peyton couldn't prevent some dude from trying to rape me like Luke could, or punch out some guy who tried to get handsy with me…Lucas was that person for me, someone who could have my back in any situation._

_He smiled again and brought his hand up to my face._

"_Of course, Brooke, and I guess I can admit to something now." His tone became more serious._

"_I would love to come to you first about these kinds of decisions, because if I were to get hooked on something, God forbid it, I know you can help me go down the right path away from that." _

_I reached up and touched his face._

"_Of course I would!" _

I did end up saving him once from doing something extremely stupid…like heroin. Damn that Felix Tagarro for trying to get him to do that stuff. Ecstasy, weed, Xanex, and mollies were one thing…but heroin, cocaine, meth? Never would I let Lucas do such horrible things.

"Uh, no, take the left, not the right."

He looked back at me confused.

"Trust me. The left is where you want to head." I smiled at him and he nodded.

We walked farther and we saw some of the most beautiful birds I'd ever seen. I stopped and took some pictures hoping that maybe I could recreate them in my own vision. Then I began to hear it. My heart sped up a little as I hoped Lucas would become entranced just as I had all those years ago. He turned to look at me with surprise and curiosity etched across his face. I pushed his back making him walk a little faster and through the excessive amount of trees and overbearing leaves, we finally came into view of one of the most beautiful cites I'd ever seen. Lucas' breath caught in his throat.

What lay before us was one of the most enchanting waterfalls that flowed into a spring lake. The trees cast the appropriate amount of desired shade and you could hear the wonderful calls of nature in the distance and you could actually smell the crisp freshness of the water. There were several large rocks centered in the lake with one sanded area that the water danced across as it ebbed in and out gently.

"I…" Lucas's words got lost in his mouth.

"It's amazing, isn't it?" I looked over at him and I don't even think he realized it, but he pulled me into his side and brought his mouth to my ear.

"Thank you." He whispered sending chills down my spine in the most spectacular way possible.

"You're welcome." I said looking up at him and he began to lower his head towards mine and I just couldn't…not yet…

"Come on! I want to show you something else!" I skipped ahead of him, resting my camera in its bag along with my clothes and shoes.

He took off his shirt and shoes and placed his bag next to mine. I started climbing along the edge of the waterfall with my feet fitting perfectly along the rock pathway. The sound of the waterfall became louder and harsher, the closer we got to it. Lucas was close to me as he moved behind me. Then I saw it…the small opening behind the waterfall. I ducked inside and he followed in.

"Wow." He said as he looked around the small cave.

There wasn't much here, I was just glad no animal…or person was residing here…or at least at the moment.

"You're amazing…this place is amazing. Brooke, you have given me the most precious gift." He said not looking at me but looking ahead through the waterfall.

"I'd do anything for you, you know that right?" I said to him, the butterflies gathering in my stomach batting their wings like crazy trying to break free.

Then he got this look in his eye. I raised a brow at him. He held his hand out to me and with no hesitation I placed mine in his. He pulled me with him as we exited the small cave and we began to climb to the top of the waterfall. Once there we could see out as far as the ocean. Everything was just breathtaking. I wasn't sure how else to explain it. There was something about this place, these surroundings, sounds, everything about it almost made you feel like you were in a magical universe where nothing else mattered but you…or in this case, me and Luke.

"It's great isn't it, I mean…" A gush of wind blew past me as I saw him just jump off the edge.

"LUUUUCCCAAAS!" I screamed as I watched him fall a good, I don't know, fifty feet from the edge?

I held my breath waiting for him to surface. I began to panic as I still didn't see him.

"LU—"

His head popped up from underneath the water, he ran his hand over his shaved head.

"Woooooooooo!" He screamed and let out this giddy laugh.

"DAMN YOU LUCAS SCOTT!" I screamed from up above him.

He looked so small down below as he craned his neck up and yelled out to me.

"Come on pretty girl! Live your life! Jump! It's an unbelievable rush!" He was treading water and his hands were moving back and forth to keep himself afloat.

I wasn't expecting him to do that, let alone myself doing that. It was pretty high up but I knew the water was deep. I just never had the courage or the thought to jump from the top; I was only a kid when I was last here. Looking down at Lucas made me realize that he was having fun and he was smiling. I don't think I've seen him smile this much since he's been back in my life.

"Shit." I cursed as I looked down again and backed up a little.

"Shit, shit, shit, shit!" I took in a deep breath.

"Just breathe." I whispered to myself.

"One, two, three!" I squealed the last word as I ran and jumped over the edge.

The wind caressed my face as my two braids flew around my head and I wrapped my arms around my legs as I made a cannonball splash into the water. The sweet, cool sensation of the water kissed my skin and I felt so alive in that moment of pure insanity. I surfaced and inhaled a huge lungful of air.

I screamed in excitement. I looked around and Lucas wasn't in sight. I turned as I tread water.

"Lucas!" I called out, no answer.

Then a pair of arms came around my legs and pulled me under. Luckily, this spring lake was some of the clearest water on the island. I saw him grinning at me and as I resurfaced, I squealed as his body glided up against mine and his head popped out of the water. We were face to face and I don't think I have ever felt this nervous before in my life. It was like for the very first time, that feeling you get when the boy you've been in love with forever is finally _yours_. I began to shake.

"Hey, hey, are you okay?" If he wasn't holding me, I may have drowned.

"I know that we've known each other for a long time and that we've slept together, seen each other naked, kissed, done almost all that we can together, this just feels like the very first time I'm experiencing it with you." I began to cry scared tears, nervous tears.

He wrapped one arm around me and with the other he brought my legs around his waist and he held us in place, his legs kicking fiercely and steadily to hold us above water.

"I'm nervous too because…I've never felt this way about any other girl except for you. Brooke…" His mouth was getting closer to mine and I couldn't stand it any longer.

I crashed my lips into his, betting on my life, blood was shed. His mouth opened mine and his tongue found mine as if it had been searching for it all this time. We fought for dominance but I allowed him to take control over my mouth. He kissed me with a vigor that I've never felt before. This was the first time, _our_ first time. He may not be able to say it but right now in his movements, his touch, I knew that he loved me. Every ounce of him was in love with me. We began to sink a little as our bodies started taking over.

We both didn't want to pull away from each other but we also knew that we didn't want to drown. I pulled away from him already feeling like a part of me was lost for the rest of eternity.

I swam until I was able to touch the ground and I got out of the water with Lucas close behind me. I went to reach for a towel but he pulled me into his chest quickly turning me around in his arms. I rested my hands on his chest and I have never felt more at home than I did just now.

"Lucas."

"Brooke." His lips found mine again and I knew what was about to happen.

There was no way my body would reject him, hell, I wouldn't allow myself to reject him. For the first time in years I was going to have sex with this amazing man, this man who has always had my heart, no matter how he treated me.

"Luke…" I brought my hands to his shoulders as he picked me up and my legs automatically went around his waist.

He started walking forwards and I trusted him to lead us to wherever it is he planned on taking me. My bare back was up against a tree.

"Luke…" I was barely able to say his name as he removed my bathing suit top.

I started to lose my vision. This is the effect he had on me. It was so mind-blowing, so crazy how my body responded to him. His mouth found one of my breasts as he devoured it. I shook from his wet mouth sucking hard and gently along my nipple. I loved how he could be gentle but rough with me.

He set me down just for a moment to remove my bottom suit and I was completely naked in all my glory in front of him. His hands ran down my body.

"You are the most beautiful woman in this world. I, I don't deserve you, Brooke." He was breathing hard and as I removed his swim trunks, I let my hands snake up his torso, his chest and rested them over his heart.

"I love you, Lucas."

He was about to speak but I cut him off. I couldn't stand it any longer. I needed this, I wanted this and I am not sure I can go on without being with him in every possible way. He picked me up again and pressed me against the tree. One of his hands held me in place as the other found its way to my aching center. He rubbed me gently and then with more force.

"Brooke." He was hesitating.

"Please…" I begged him.

He removed his hand and then everything felt complete as he entered me. We both gasped at the same time as everything fell into place. This was right, it was more than right, it was meant to be. I didn't belong to anybody else but him, and he belonged to me. He stayed still for a moment remembering how it felt to be inside of me. I had forgotten just how big he was as I could feel myself becoming familiar to him filling me whole.

"Luke…" I needed him to start moving.

He began to thrust slowly in and out making my whole body spark with electricity. My body was on fire. I dug my nails into his shoulders as he increased his speed. I wasn't sure how much longer I could keep from exploding. I have had sex a couple of times after Lucas but I have never felt anything like this with any other guy.

"Brooke, I…I lo—" He increased his thrusts faster and faster and I screamed in pleasure as his hands tightened around me.

We both climaxed at the same time and he collapsed against me. I was pinned between him and the tree and I didn't care that the rough texture of the tree was cutting into my skin. It didn't matter because what I just experienced with him was unlike anything else.

"Brooke, I…"

"Shhh." I wasn't going to force him to say it; I didn't _need_ him to say it because I _felt_ it.

He looked up at me and I held his face in my hands. I leaned down and gently kissed him.

"So much for baby steps." He said quietly.

I smiled but knew he was right, this was too soon, but I didn't care anymore. After talking to Haley earlier and coming to terms that there is always a possibility that I could lose Lucas unexpectedly, I got to experience his love, his love that he would and could not give to any one else than how he did with me just a moment ago.

"Come on, let's get back, the sun will go down soon. I don't want Haley worrying about us." I said as I kissed his forehead.

He was still panting, taking in rough, ragged breaths. I started to walk away from him but he grabbed my hand and kissed it gently. I smiled to myself and we started gathering our clothes. We got dressed and started walking back. Mid way through our walk, the sun had set, and we were greeted with the moonlight guiding us back. All the lights were on in the house indicating that everyone was back and I was dreading the mother inside Haley worrying away about the both of us. At one point during our walk back, Lucas grabbed my hand and we walked all the way back with our fingers intertwined.

I let go of his hand as I took the steps first ahead of him reaching the deck. I saw Clay and Rachel playing a game of checkers and Nathan with Haley in the kitchen. I smiled. I opened the door and Lucas followed in behind me.

"Thank God! I was so worried about you two." Haley ran from the kitchen and pulled us both in her arms.

"Hales we just went for a walk." Lucas said as she held a death grip on us.

"Okay Hales cutting off my air supply." I coughed and she let us go.

Rachel was eyeballing me and she bit her lip and winked at me. I rolled my eyes at her. She always knew when I had sex and this time was no different.

"Did you enjoy your _walk_, Lucas?" She asked emphasizing on the word, walk.

"Yes." He said coolly.

"What's for dinner?" I asked.

"Lobster chowder. Thought I'd keep it simple tonight." Haley said.

"That sounds amazing." Lucas said as he winked at me and I smiled.

"How was snorkeling?" I asked as I gave Clay a hug from behind and he kissed my arm.

"It was pretty great. Rachel was greeted by a barracuda. I probably have permanent nail indentions on my arm." He pointed to his arm and it sure did look like she left her mark on him.

"I don't think I have ever been more terrified and excited in my life. It was scary and exhilarating. It was like ten feet long. I've never experienced anything like it before." She said as she flipped her hair in her hands.

It was very rare to see Rachel without make up and she was even more beautiful without it.

"That does sound like fun." I looked over my shoulder quickly seeing Lucas and Nathan talking.

He was laughing. I don't think I've ever seen him so happy before. He said something to Haley and she laughed, lightly hitting him in the arm. He kissed the side of her face. He started pulling out dishes for everyone and I never wanted to leave this place now. There was no drama, no fighting, and no stress. We were all happy and enjoying ourselves.

Clay went into the kitchen to grab something to drink when Rachel yanked me towards her.

"You better spill." She gripped me tightly.

"There's nothing to tell." I said.

"I'm calling bull shit. You had sex!" She whispered harshly and everyone in the kitchen noticed us.

"Rachel wants my bod." I said as Nathan and Haley snickered as Clay and Lucas tried to picture it in their minds.

"It's true." She said only encouraging the wakening image in their heads.

I pinched her and she cried out and thumped me in the arm. I turned only facing her and mouthed, _later_. Her mouth dropped and she bounced with joy.

"Okay you two what's the big secret?" Haley asked as she came around with the large pot of chowder.

"Like I said she's getting tired of Clay and she wants me." I said. I wasn't going to keep it from Haley but I also didn't want everyone at this particular moment knowing my business.

"Well, Rachel, keep it in your pants until dinner is over." Haley joked.

We all gathered around the table. I sat in between Rachel and Nathan, Haley by his side, Lucas across from me, and Clay next to Lucas and Rachel. Lucas's foot found mine and I grinned.

"Let's eat!"

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><p><strong>Soooo...what did we think? I figured I would give you what you've all been waiting for but like always...what will come of this? <strong>

**Up next... Brooke and Lucas talk. Haley and Rachel spend some time together. Brooke spills the details to the ladies while the guys talk, but what do the boys talk about? **

**Stay tuned! REVIEW PLEASE!**


	16. How Was the Sex?

**A/N: Thanks to all you lovely people for reviewing and all those who have stopped by to read the latest chapter and guess what? Here's another! ENJOY! Just know, sadly, we are getting to the end...told you this would be a shorter story...and we're getting there. :(**

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><p><strong>Chapter 16: How was the Sex?<strong>

I awoke to the faint laughter of a particular red head. I groaned slightly as I squinted my eyes at the sun trying to peak in through the windows. I rolled over to find the other side of the bed empty and cold. I sat upright quickly and looked around the room. Maybe the bathroom? I kicked my legs over the side of the bed, pushed myself off and knocked on the bathroom door. No answer.

"Lucas?" I peaked inside and he wasn't there.

I frowned. I was always the one to be up first so this kind of spooked me a little. I heard the glass doors slide open and I was figuring it was Rachel as I heard her voice getting closer.

"Hey Rach, have you—" I stepped back into the main room and to my surprise it wasn't Rachel.

"Nate and I cooked breakfast. You seemed to be sleeping very well so I decided I would bring you a plate." He held the tray in his hand firmly as he walked towards me.

The tray had a touch of Haley with the multicolored vase of hibiscus flowers. I smiled and he motioned towards the bed but I shook my head and skipped towards one of the sofas. He placed the tray down in front of me on the table.

"Thank you. This smells wonderful."

Since we'd been here, I hadn't really spent that much alone time with Clay. I mean Clay filled a void where Lucas used to be. He became that person I could turn to for the things I used to turn to Lucas for…I missed him.

"How you doing?" Clay sat across from me as I bit into the coconut pancakes.

I closed my eyes as the warm, gooey texture slid down my throat.

"Good…and you?" I asked him looking up at him with a mouthful of pancake.

He grinned.

"I'm doing pretty great actually. I—" He fidgeted with one of the petals of a flower then broke it off. I frowned.

"You…what?" I mumbled as I took another forkful.

"I told Rachel I loved her yesterday after we went snorkeling."

I dropped my fork and looked up at him wide eyed.

"Huh?" I was speechless.

"Yeah…I, I mean it just came out and it surprised both of us. She…was skipping down the beach rambling about the damn barracuda and I just said it." He was talking with his hands picturing it as if it was a movie on repeat in his mind.

I leaned over, squeezed his arm, and smiled at him.

"I've always known you loved her…what, what did she say?"

He smiled.

"She laughed at me first. But, when I realized that I meant it and she saw the look on my face, she stopped laughing and questioned me." He shook his head and leaned back in his chair resting his hands on his thighs.

"And?"

"She didn't believe me until I said it again and I really did mean it." He looked up at me.

"But what did she _say_?" It was like I _was_ watching a movie waiting with anticipation to see where the happy couple would end up.

"She said she loved me too." His smile broke out over his entire face.

"Oh, Clay." I got up, sat in his lap and pulled him into a hug.

"It's about damn time you both fessed up!" I smacked him lightly in the arm.

"Yeah well what about you and Broody boy?" He pushed me lightly out of his lap and I bounced back over to my seat to finish my pancakes.

I knew I promised Rachel and Haley that I would talk to them but maybe Lucas should have been the one to talk to Clay about it?

"Maybe you should spend time with him. Talk to 'im 'bout 't?" I said with a mouthful of pancake again.

He shook his head at me and leaned back in his chair again.

"Brooke, I just told you something very important about me and Rachel, something I am sure she would have preferred to talk to you about herself." He really wanted to know about this.

"You're right but it probably wouldn't bother Rachel that you told me. We've been friends for a really long time but Lucas…it's different…" I stuffed my mouth again with food cursing that it was my last bit on my plate.

"I don't see how it's different but I'll talk to him." He seemed annoyed and I didn't want him leaving like that.

"With everything going on with Lucas…" I cut myself off trying to figure out the best way to tell him this.

"Lucas has always been quiet and protective of me and our relationship we've always had and that was something I loved so much about him. It was only between me and Lucas at the time, I mean I wouldn't really spill details to anybody else about our relationship, but now, things are just different. Lucas really does like and respect you Clay. I'm sure if you talked to him about it, he would open up." I hoped that I was convincing about it.

Hell, Lucas and I really haven't talked about what was going to happen now after yesterday…why should everyone else know our business when we don't even know what _it_ is yet?

"Besides Lucas and I really haven't talked about _us_…I told Rachel and Haley I would spend time with them today. How about you plan something with Nate and Luke? It's time we had a girls day and you had a guys day." I suggested and he was beginning to think it was a good idea.

"Sure. Get Rachel to tell you all the awesome things about me and then later spill to me." He winked and I smacked him in the arm.

He stopped before leaving the room and turned back to me.

"Rachel told me about Luke and his heart. I'm sorry Brooke, but if he knows what's best for him, he's not going to go anywhere." He winked again at me and I smiled.

"Clay."

He stopped and turned back to look at me.

"I love you, you know that?"

He smiled.

"I love you too, Brooke Davis."

He slid the glass door open and then closed it shut behind him. I sank down into the bed and turned to face Luke's side. I reached my hand across the bed and closed my eyes.

"_Dinner was pretty good. I don't know what I'll do if I ever have to live without it." He tossed his hat on the couch and I stared at him._

"_Don't say things like that." I walked over to the closet and he followed me._

"_What?" _

_My back was to him. I turned around quickly and pointed at him._

"_Don't think negative. Nothing is going to happen to you!" A chill ran down my spine and I wrapped my arms around myself._

_He had a look of panic on his face and he walked towards me._

"_I'm sorry. I really didn't mean it like that…I honestly wasn't even thinking about that." He placed his hands on my arms and pulled me into his chest._

"_I don't see how you could forget. It's on my mind every second, just the thought that I could possibly lose you." As I went to wrap my arms around him, he tensed and pulled back._

"_It's on your mind every second? So when you fucked me earlier, was it on your mind then too?" He pulled away from me and started undressing, throwing his clothes around the room._

"_What the hell is your problem?" I stalked towards him and pushed him._

"_You slept with me out of pity! Didn't you? Giving me one last fuck before my heart gives out!" He started walking to the bathroom._

_Just when I thought that things were going the way they were supposed to that stubborn ass hole in him shows its ugly face._

_I picked up a pillow and threw it at him. Oh how this became like a routine for us. He turned around and glared at me. _

"_How fucking dare you accuse me of doing something like that! I told you I loved you and guess what I actually __**said**__ it and meant it! What did you do? You really didn't say or do anything! If anything I should be fucking mad at you but you know what that doesn't matter to me! Do you want to know what was __**really**__ going on in my mind when we were having sex!?" I was screaming at him and I am pretty sure everyone upstairs could hear now confirming that we did sleep together. _

_His chest was heaving up and down in angry breaths._

"_I was thinking I finally got to be with you again and there was nothing else in the world I'd rather be doing. Nowhere else I'd rather be and no one else I'd rather be with. Damn you Lucas Scott. I fucking love you more than anyone else and more than any other person should love another. Yes, the thought of losing you is on my mind all the time because if I do ever lose you, I don't think I could go on." I started collapsing. _

_I didn't realize that saying these things out loud would have this effect on me but my legs gave out on me and I started falling just in time for Lucas to run across the room and swiftly pick me up in his arms. I fell against him awkwardly. I couldn't use my limbs, everything was numb, and I just buried my face into him. _

"_I'm sorry…I didn't…" He took in a deep breath._

"_How could you not, you bastard?" I clutched at his bare chest. _

"_You're the only person who has never hurt me and I just, guess that maybe, just maybe, because of this problem I'm having, that you were doing me a favor? I know it sounds stupid but it's the first thing that comes to me because I know that others would do the same." He was having a hard time saying this. I knew him opening up like this was difficult._

_I looked up at him and new sets of tears started to fall._

"_Then you're an idiot for thinking I could be one of those people." _

_Did he really think of me like that? That I could be one of those people that would hurt him, use him like that?_

"_I know you're not like that…I've never thought that, I guess, I am trying Brooke, maybe just some things will never change about me." He slowly let me go and he walked away._

"_I'm no good for you, Brooke. The evidence has and will always be there. The way I treat you, talk to you. I—"_

"_How can you say things like that? You are everything I've always wanted and more. You're an ass hole because you choose to be. Don't be that person Lucas. Be the person I saw earlier today. The one I've always known you could be because guess what you've always been like that." I was able to use my legs again and I stood up and looked at him._

_I could tell all this heavy talking was wearing him out and I didn't blame him. I was tired too._

"_Let's just, just go to bed. Tomorrow is a new day and even though you've pissed me off tonight, I'll forgive you if you just go to sleep with me." _

"_Is there ever going to be a time when I don't piss you off?" He said with humor but I knew he was being serious._

"_Maybe that's what you're supposed to do to me because it still leaves me falling even more in love with you." _

_He went to speak and after a revelation like that from me, I really did just want to go to bed._

"_Let's sleep please." I cut him off before he could say anything else._

_We got into bed together and he pulled me close to his chest. I was able to fall asleep immediately in the comfort of his arms._

I opened my eyes as I clutched his side of the bed and got up. It's a new day.

* * *

><p>I held the piece of paper in my hands. I have probably read over my words a thousand times since I wrote it yesterday. The way the mangled paper looked seemed like this was written years ago.<p>

A particular laughter behind me caught my attention. I smiled and folded the paper quickly and stuffed it in my pocket.

"Oooooh what was that? A dirty, love letter?" Her feet skipped lightly along the wooden boards of the patio.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" I leaned against the railing and she puffed as she fell in sync next to me and bumped her hips into mine.

"Whatever, so how was the sex? Was it better than before?" She nudged me and raised her eyebrows at me.

I shook my head.

"I don't really think that's any of your business Red."

She let out this little whine and I laughed a little at her.

"You're no fun anymore."

I looked over at her for the first time since she came over to me. She looked _different_. I looked her up and down and there was definitely something different about her.

She turned around and leaned her back along the railing and closed her eyes as a small breeze blew across her face.

"You look different. You're glowing in a way. What happened?" I stood up straight so I could get a better look at her face.

She began to blush and now I was extremely curious.

"I finally said those three little words to someone other than Brookie." She looked over at me and my mouth dropped slightly.

She's always joked around saying it to me but with Brooke she actually meant it and it was real and pure. So she loved Clay…she was in love with him.

"That's great. I am happy for you. You two do seem made for each other." I smiled at her and pulled her into a hug.

Oh Rachel. I don't know what I'd ever do without this girl. She was my equal in the department of those who hated us but were secretly in love with us. When I wanted to be mischievous or evil, she was there to go through with the plan. Whenever I wanted to get a rise out of Brooke especially my first couple of weeks back, she would help me. My partner in crime.

"Alright now, if you start to play grab ass with my lady, I may just have to crack open your skull, Scott." Clay started coming up the steps from my room with Brooke.

"I'd like to see you try, Evans." I said in a mock tone and he grinned.

"Boys as much as I love two men fighting over me…I'd prefer it not this time." She leaned up and kissed my cheek and then skirted over to Clay.

They were happy. He leaned down and kissed her and she smiled against his lips. I began to wonder if Brooke and I could ever be like that and display it to the world.

Clay pulled away from Rachel a bit and looked over at me.

"Hey man so Brooke informed me that it was girls day today…so I was thinking you, me and Nate do something? Grab some beer, food, and take a boat out and do some fishing?"

Sometimes I hated to admit how much I liked this guy. He was cool and had earned my respect.

"Sure, sounds good to me." I said and he nodded.

"Alright the day is planned. I am going to go get Haley." Rachel grabbed Clay's hand and they walked past me and back into the house.

I reached my hands into my pockets and fingered the piece of paper carefully. I heard faint footsteps coming up the steps and I turned to see the beginning of Brooke's head come into view, then her shoulders, chest, waist, and her legs. She was absolutely breathtaking.

She wore a blue sundress with gold sandals that made her tan legs shimmer. I held my breath.

"What?" She questioned as she made it to the top step.

"You look beautiful." I said and I held my hand out to her.

She looked down at it like it was going to bite her, then she slowly walked over and placed her hand in mine. She smiled and I pulled her to me. We stood by each other and enjoyed the view. It's been a whole week since we'd been here. Just a week left of this escape, paradise…would things change once we left? Would all of this have just been a dream?

Brooke leaned her head into my shoulder as a small breeze swept across us; I felt the goosebumps along her arms. I pulled her into my chest and her face nuzzled my neck.

"Hey guys."

I looked over my shoulder, making Brooke turn more into me, and squinted my eyes to see Haley walking towards us. Brooke slowly but quickly removed herself from my touch and I felt lonely…and cold.

"I…am I interrupting something?" She asked as she looked between me and Brooke.

"No, we were just enjoying the view…together." Brooke brushed a strand of brick red hair behind her ear and how desperately I wished I had done that for her.

"So I guess you are getting ready to leave…and do your girly things today?" I shoved my hands in my pockets and for the first time I became awkward around them feeling like an idiot.

"Uh yeah, Rachel is grabbing her bag and then we're going to head out. We talked to Nathan and Clay about meeting up with you guys at the beach. There's a large bonfire celebration going on there tonight." Haley smiled and touched my arm giving it a comforting squeeze.

"Okay, you ladies have fun. Don't talk too much about me." I winked at them and they both smacked me in the arm at the same time.

"Ouch." I furrowed my brow in pain and they both rolled their eyes at me.

I looked back at Brooke one last time and she smiled a small smile for me. I smiled back and walked past Rachel as she came bounding down the stairs and Haley and Brooke met up with her at the car. They climbed in with smiles on their faces and faint laughter echoing in the distance. They drove off and I headed inside to find Nathan and Clay messing around with what I assumed would be our equipment for the fishing trip.

"Okay I have the cooler of beer and food…and a little something extra." He pulled out a bag of weed and my mouth dropped.

"Dude. What the hell? Don't they test you for basketball?" Nathan grabbed the fishing poles and started carrying them towards the door.

"Yes, but we just had a test and because I am so fit and don't carry much body fat, I can piss this shit out by tomorrow."

I grinned and I really haven't smoked since freshman year.

"I don't know." Nathan said as he let his finger poke the bag of what smelled like some good shit.

"You want in on this Nate. It's strawberry diesel and besides…Lucas could use some." He winked at me and for once I wasn't upset that someone was referring to my personal issues.

I assumed Rachel or Brooke would say something to him about my heart, and with Clay, it seemed like it was okay for him to know about it. He respected me and he didn't look at me at all if I might kill over any time soon.

"I'm in." I walked over to Clay, grabbed the bag, and inhaled the most pleasurable scent. One of the best smells I'd come across.

"Amazing. Can't wait to take a hit of that. Nate, come on, free pass on this trip."

He looked at both of us and finally caved.

"Well we are on vacation." He said and I smacked him in the arm as he smacked me back.

We started packing our things in the Jeep. We drove the only road we knew that led us to the nearest beach. Clay had placed our goods in a safe place, just in case the owners of the boat we were renting had any questions for us.

It was a piece of cake getting the keys to the boat and we rented it for the rest of the week. The owners were pleased with the amount of money Clay offered them and just asked that we didn't destroy the boat. It was a beautiful boat. Her name was _Dancing Dame_. How poetic.

I was about knee deep in the ocean as I passed our things from Nathan to Clay onto the boat. She was beautiful. Her name did fit her. She was made out of the best fiberglass and her sharp charcoal black body danced along the water. Her sails were not up yet, but I am sure her wings were just as magnificent.

"I can't believe you rented this boat? How much are we talking?" I asked Clay as I climbed the steps onto the boat and became even more overwhelmed.

"Don't worry about it." He cut on the engine and the boat came to life.

"Our beauty purrs. Let's get on out to sea shall we mates." Clay revved the engine and she skipped off on a slow start and then we were gliding like the waltz across the clear ocean water.

"Exactly how far are we going out?" Nathan asked as we watched the beach get smaller and smaller.

"Just far out enough where we're not surrounded by others and they did give me a parameter."

We were about maybe two or three miles away from shore which was a safe distance and if we did need help, the radio was working and we had plenty of gas.

"Alright let's do this." Nathan had beer and poles in his hand.

"First, let's smoke." Clay grinned as he started breaking the weed down.

It was so beautiful and even out in this open, crisp ocean air, the smell of the weed was rich and flavorful. He quickly filled the weed along the rolling papers and it was ready. He lit up first, taking his hit, and then passed it to Nathan.

I watched as Clay inhaled, savored it, and blew it out smoothly. My mouth began to water. Nathan took his turn and passed the joint to me. I inhaled its sweet aroma and placed my lips on the edge and inhaled sharply. The taste was amazing and my throat burned slightly in the best way possible. I exhaled slowly as the effects started to course through my body. I passed the joint back to Clay.

"So what's up man?" Clay passed to Nathan and leaned back in his chair.

"Not much man, you?" My eyes drooped a bit and the boat started rocking at a slow pace as my body became at ease, relaxed, numb to where it felt good.

Clay laughed and Nate did too.

"So no, like what's the deal with you and Brooke? You can't hide it, you two." Clay ran his hand over his face and stared at me.

I looked down at my hands and they looked really tiny, I began to lean to the left a little.

"Damn this is some good shit." I said as I rested my hand along the railing to keep myself from falling over.

"Thanks and Brooke…come on."

"Spill Lucas, I've been pretty curious myself." Nathan was high and I don't think I've ever seen him smoke before.

"She's amazing…she's my Brooke." I giggled and closed my eyes as she flooded my sight.

I knew I should talk about it. Talk about Brooke. I don't talk about her to anybody but myself really. I leaned closer to them and rested my elbows on my knees.

"Brooke is my air. I breathe her in and I'm alive because of her. She's…she's my heart." Things started to fade away and I was only focused on my Brooke as if she was standing right in front of me.

"Every moment that goes by when I'm not with her, my heart is gone. I may as well be dead."

"Do you love her?"

At first I wasn't even sure if Clay or Nathan had asked me that. Did I ask myself that?

"Of course."

Nathan's hand was on my arm and he smiled.

"Tell her man."

"You're so stupid to have waited this long to tell her…do you even plan on telling her?"

I looked up and Clay looked annoyed.

"Oh yeah, this coming from a guy who would pretend to mess around behind Rachel's back even though she was the only one for you. You just now confessed that you love her so don't tell me that I'm an idiot for waiting this long." I sat upright and all this talk was beginning to kill my buzz.

"You're right but guess what? I did say something and it's made everything so much better, more amazing." Clay took his fishing rod and tossed it over the side of the boat.

"You know I remember the first time I knew I had fallen in love with Haley."

My head snapped up quickly and I realized just now Nathan has never mentioned this before.

"We had just left school and dad was being a pain in the ass. We snuck off to the beach. She told me she needed to meet up with you, Luke, but she said you could wait a little bit." He grinned and twirled his fingers.

I shook my head only trying to figure out which time she left me waiting on her when she was off with Nate.

"Anyways, she was just laughing and telling jokes and at this point we had made out a few times both trying desperately to keep it from you and Brooke because we weren't even sure what it was, but it was in that moment that I knew I was in love with her and that there would probably never be anyone else in the world for me." Nathan leaned back, closed his eyes, and inhaled the fresh sea air.

"She is my everything but I don't understand why I am having a hard time saying that to _her_, telling her that I love her." Was that me finally confessing out loud that I loved Brooke?

"I don't see how it can be hard. When you know, when you feel it, there shouldn't be anything keeping you from saying it." Clay said now standing near the edge of the boat looking over the side.

I instinctively placed my hand over my heart. This is what's keeping me from saying it to her.

"Dude, don't let _that_ be the reason you can't tell her, if anything _that_ should be the reason you tell her." Nathan stood up to get another beer and sat down by me.

He placed his hand on my shoulder and gave it a small squeeze.

"She's been in love with you since we were kids; she's not going anywhere Luke."

* * *

><p>We walked down the cobble stoned streets of St. John's and came across a strip of stores. Rachel coaxed us into one, and then we proceeded to shop in every single store. One of them had all original clothing from local designers. I became instantly jealous. I wanted my own line one day and only hoped that it would be possible to achieve it.<p>

"So I can't take it any longer. What happened with you and Lucas?" Rachel flipped through some shirts on a rack and pulled out a gorgeous silk top that would look great on her.

"We slept together yesterday, okay." I don't know why I was being shy about it.

I guess talking about it out loud made it possible that maybe it could have been a dream? That it wasn't special anymore just between Luke and me?

"I knew it!" Rachel took the top off the rack and held it in her hand.

"Yeah, after the cozy set up I saw on the patio this morning, I assumed something happened. Are you guys okay? What does this mean?" Haley asked as she found a dress I had to force her to buy.

"You should get that. It would accent your eyes and give you curves you didn't know you had." I winked at her and she took it in her hands.

"Uh, stop changing the subject! Spill!" Rachel looped her arm through mine as we walked towards the dressing rooms.

"It…it was like the first time you know? It was like I was experiencing all the firsts with him all over again. His kiss, touch, and the first time being together. I was almost certain he was going to say the L word, but I don't want to make him say it, or because we had sex for the first time in years that he needed to say it." Although I desperately want him to say those words to me now more than ever.

"So romantic." Haley said with a dazed look upon her face.

"So how was the sex?" Rachel raised an eyebrow and I smacked her in the arm.

"Let's not forget that you've slept with him before. I really don't want to talk about that with you." I said blushing and almost not wanting to hear the comparisons if it were to come up.

"True but we were never in love with each other. I am sure it's different. God, I know it is with Clay." She beamed and there was a different glow about her now.

"I picked something out for you, Brooke." Haley walked beside me and pulled from behind her back a dress that almost seemed unlike any other.

It was an emerald green that was designed with intricate loops and swirls along the fabric. It was strapless and stopped below the knee at the appropriate length. The back had crisscrossed stitching that laced across the entire back. It did look beautiful.

"It's beautiful." I took it from her and we proceeded into the dressing rooms.

We tried everything on and of course everything looked great. Rachel probably bought out every store we went in and we were becoming extremely overwhelmed with shopping bags.

We made the decision to catch a light bite to eat at one of the nearby restaurants and we talked about everything. It turned out to be a lovely day. It was getting close to the time for us to meet up with the guys. We went back to the house, dropped off our goodies, and changed into more laid back attire.

Rachel drove this time as I gazed out the window letting the breeze sweep over my face. Haley leaned towards my seat from the back resting her chin on top of the seat near my head.

"I know he loves you, Brooke and you guys will work this out. I promise."

I turned and kissed her forehead. I hoped she was right because I wasn't sure I could live another moment without him being a part of my life.

Once we were at the beach, there was still no sign of them or their boat at all. People started gathering for the bonfire and we just kind of shrugged it off. If something was wrong, we'd find out soon enough. Local venders were setting up booths for local cuisines, bars for different types of drinks, and even some fun games you could play.

I decided to wear a pair of cut off jeans, a purple bikini, and a white tank that had a low cut off in the back. I wore one of my sun hats. Rachel wore a sarong leaving her chest bare with her bikini top with all the heads turning to look at her. She was made to be a model. Haley, always dressed like Haley. She wore a long, flowing skirt, with a strapless top with her bathing suit straps hanging down her neck.

We had about three drinks in us right as the bonfire was lit and the different events started. Rachel squealed as Clay came into sight. She jumped into his arms and he held her close. Nathan staggered behind him and walked towards Haley. I finally saw Lucas carrying a cooler.

I looked him over and noticed something different about him and I realized what it was.

"You've been smoking." I said as he grinned with his stoner eyes.

"Ah, Brooke we still have plenty left if you want to smoke with us later." Clay called out as Rachel started kissing down his neck.

"We'll see." I said and Lucas grabbed my hand and tugged me towards him.

"You look nice." He said.

"You looked stoned." I said to him, not that I minded but this sweet talk had a lot to do with his nice choice of words.

"Sshhh." He said.

We set up our own little spot around the fire and we met a variety of people. Natives, tourists, and we even met some people from Durham. The drinks started flowing and we were all having a great time. At some point, Haley and Nathan disappeared while Clay and Rachel danced seductively around the fire lost in their own little world.

Lucas went to get himself another drink as I sat on the cooler looking out to sea. I heard him coming back towards me as one of the songs turned into a slower, steady melody. He held his hand out to me.

"Dance with me?" He asked.

"Since when do you dance?" I asked as he pulled me to my feet and we started walking towards the other dancing, mingling people.

"Ssshh." He said to me once again.

He pulled me into him. My head rested along his chest, one of his hands on the small of my back as the other held my outstretched one. I gripped his shoulder tightly with my free hand. I didn't want to speak even though there was so much I wanted to say. We started moving in a circle and I forgot that there were other people around us including those who knew us very well.

His hand that rested on my back started creeping up towards the space between my shoulder blades. He pulled my hand that was in his towards his shoulder and brought his hand to my face. I held my breath.

"Brooke." He leaned in and kissed me for the whole population of the beach to see.

I didn't care. I was lost in him. I was so wrapped up in him that I didn't realize at first that he literally swept me off my feet as I dangled in the air in his arms.

"Now that's how you sweep a girl off her feet." Someone muttered as they walked by us.

I pulled back from Lucas and looked around. Rachel and Clay were still dancing but watching us with smiles on their faces.

"Lucas?"

"Brooke, I…" He paused and pushed me back a moment.

"Luke?" Fear started to surface as the look on his face was one I didn't like at all.

"I think, I think I need to lie down. Sometimes I just get a little overwhelmed." He said and I knew he was being honest and not hiding anything from me.

"Okay." I ran over and talked to Clay and Rachel and told them I was going to take Lucas home.

I told them not to worry and to stay and have a good time and wait on Haley and Nathan to get back. Clay helped walk Lucas to the car. Clay repeatedly told me to call him on his cell if anything was to happen and I promised him I would. As I drove back to the house, I kept glancing over at Lucas who was sleeping soundly. I reached my hand over to his and held it tightly. At some point, he noticed I was holding his hand and he brought his other one over to clasp mine tightly within his own.

We were back at the house and I helped him get into bed.

"I'm sorry." He said and I shook my head fiercely.

"No, don't be!" I said sliding into bed next to him.

"Sometimes I just get really tired, you know with a heart running on empty. I just need to recharge the old damned thing." He smiled through his closed lids.

I knew he was trying to make a joke to not scare me. But it still didn't make me feel better, because it is the truth. His heart was running low on battery.

"Just get some sleep and we can talk tomorrow."

* * *

><p><strong>YAY! Okay what did you think? Up next: Brooke and Lucas talk. Things begin to change but how? Stay Tuned! REVIEW please! :)<strong>


	17. Paradise Lost

**WOW! IT has been forever since I posted ANYTHING for ANY of my stories! I am truly sorry for this. My life has been a bit of a mess lately and instead of writing, I've been reading. But I am trying to get back in the groove of things so here's another chapter. THANK YOU to all that have been sending me messages even though I may not have gotten back to you, it has meant a lot soooo here we go! Enjoy.**

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><p><em><strong>If I should die this very moment<strong>_

_**I wouldn't fear for I've never known **_

_**completeness like being here **_

_**wrapped in the warmth of you**_

_**loving every breath of you**_

_**"Lamb" - Gorecki**_

There was a faint hint of jasmine lingering in the air stinging my nostrils in the best way. I leaned in and noticed the scent was touching my nose. I went to open my heavy eyes as the sun dared to shine through the window. There was something warm against my body and I smiled. She made a faint little noise that brought a smile to my face. She was here, in my arms. I couldn't believe it. She…was here…with me. I opened my eyes completely and looked down to see her enveloped in my arms.

She gripped her arms around me tighter. I bent down and kissed her on the forehead. It was something I never thought I would find myself doing. Being a sweet, caring, loving boyfriend? Wait, am I Brooke's boyfriend? What the hell am I to her now? I really didn't want to have this conversation. It would involve details, rules, and guidelines. Why can't we just _be_ together? Oh yeah, I remember now. I fucked her best friend in high school and pretty much ruined her and every chance we had at being happy together. I am a total ass hole and I don't deserve this amazing woman at all. But I am selfish and I want her all to myself. How damaged am I? How fucked up does one person have to be to treat someone like the way I did to _her_?

"Hmm…good morning." She said against my chest.

I smiled.

"Hey pretty girl."

She shifted in my arms and I felt her smile against my skin.

"I love waking up to that. I feel like this is our first morning waking up together here." She lifted her head towards me and it was true.

I don't think we've ever woken up together. I was either gone before she awoke and vice versa.

"Yes this is nice." I said leaning down again and kissing her lightly on the forehead.

"What are we doing Luke?"

Jump right to it. She's beating me to it and now I've become completely speechless. What the hell am I supposed to say? I don't have these conversations and I never have. Where do I start? What do I say?

"All I know Brooke is that I want to be able to walk outside right now, hold your hand, and hold you the way Nathan does with Haley and the way Clay kisses Rachel. I want to do that." It was the best I could come up with.

I could see tears shining through her eyes as she scooted closer to my face and let her lips linger gently against mine as she kissed me.

"Okay." She said on my lips as I deepened the kiss.

I pulled her closer to me as I rolled on my back and she fell flush against me wrapping her arms around my neck.

She moaned against my lips as I let my hands slide down her sides and grabbed her ass fiercely making her gasp against my mouth.

There was a knock on the door and it made us jump away from each other.

"I'm not spying on you, I swear." Haley said through the door and when I looked I saw that she had her hand over her eyes.

"I just wanted to let you know I made breakfast. Didn't want to leave you guys out. Continue as you were." She skipped away quickly.

Brooke burst out laughing and rolled on top of me again.

"As much as I would like to continue what we were doing, I am famished." She raised her eyebrows and I smiled at her.

"I am not going to lie, I am too, but not for food." I raised my eyebrows at her to take on my challenge.

"How about we give them a run for their money?"

I was confused at her statement, but she got off the bed, pulled me with her and led me into the bathroom. She began to undress and I realized what she meant. Earlier this week, Clay and Rachel were having sex and apparently wanted the whole world to know. Brooke was suggesting we have sex in our shower that is outside with no enclosure. Extremely sexy of her.

"As you wish mi'lady." I followed her lead and undressed myself.

She was absolutely breathtaking in all her naked glory. She had the cutest, yet perfect tan lines. She reached for my hand and yanked me into the shower. I cut the water on as the steam filled around us. The hot water rolling down my back only added to the amazing sensation Brooke was giving my body.

Her hands caressed around my shoulders, my chest, my hips, and my ass. Her touch was exhilarating. I couldn't take it any longer. I picked her up, her legs clinging around my waist, and I slammed her against one of the walls and she let out a scream of passion.

"I want you so fucking bad." I hissed against her neck.

"Then take me."

Without any more hesitation I thrust my dick inside her hard and she screamed in pleasure. Her tight walls gripped me hard and I bit my lip to thrust in and out of her. I let out an animalistic growl that sent her over the edge. She dug her nails into my shoulders as she screamed my name. It was the most amazing sound ever. She removed her hands from my shoulders and placed them around my head pulling me into her chest. I sucked vigorously on her breasts one at a time teasing and giving them the same amount of attention and added pleasure. She bucked wildly against me and I wasn't even sure how I was able to keep us vertical the whole time.

We were animals going wild with our bodies. I don't think I've ever been that loud but that was the effect Brooke had on me. I didn't care if the whole world was watching us right now and then. I was completely lost in her.

"Fuck Brooke I'm coming."

She growled at me and my eyes shot opened to see her coming as well and the look on her face was priceless. It would be forever embedded in my mind. My forehead fell against her breasts as we both heaved in and out for air.

We finished showering and for once I had to admit I was a little bit embarrassed that Haley, Nathan, Clay and Rachel heard us. As we reached the stairs near the door, Brooke stopped, placed her hand in mine and pulled me inside.

Haley was blushing, Nathan was trying to hold back any comments he wished to share with the group, Clay was grinning like an idiot and Rachel…

"Whores." She said the moment we were inside.

"Slut, don't even. You two woke me from a perfectly good nap the other day. So shut it." Brooke pointed her finger back and forth between Clay and Rachel.

"So can we finally agree that you two are officially together?" Nathan said as he leaned back in his chair.

"Yeah, I think so." I said shocking myself.

"I'm happy for you both." Haley said as the red started to leave her face.

We finished breakfast and we're mapping out our last few days here. It was drawing near to the end but we were going to enjoy every moment we had left.

"I can't wait to go snorkeling." Brooke placed a bag on the bed and started packing some quick essentials and clothes.

"Baby come on now, you know for a fact you don't need anymore clothing especially considering I plan on taking you out of them later." I grabbed her shirt and threw it across the room, picked up her pants and shook my head and tossed it aside as well.

"Hey!" She ran over, smacked me, picked up her clothes and placed them back in the bag.

"What?"

"We do have plans after snorkeling. So I am packing them and you should grab some too." She disappeared in the bathroom.

I grabbed a nice pair of shorts and a shirt. We were going to another beach party but this one was more for a pleasant time, not for horny college students to have a good time. They were having a local concert near the pier and a walk up bar where they served some of the best fish tacos around, your choice of meat and toppings. Honestly, I had to admit I was looking forward to it.

Clay and Nathan booked a private tour of the island with Rachel and Haley. We were going to join, but I think we all could agree that Brooke and I needed some alone time. It was the first day we were declaring ourselves in a relationship together. A celebration with just the two of us was in order.

I let Brooke finish packing for the both of us for many reasons. One, she is a fashionista, she thrives for clothing and surely she would pick out something better than I would for myself. Second, I loved and relished in the fact that she loved taking care of me that way. My mother was the only other woman who did that for me and I didn't feel threatened or babied. It was an unconditional love that is very rare to find in another, I believe.

I ran into my favorite red who seemed disgruntled.

"What's the stick up your ass about?" I leaned against the railing of the patio and she crossed her arms and glared at me.

"Don't hurt her." It was all she said and Rachel Gatina was not a woman of few words.

"Rachel." I called out but she stormed away and a small part of me wondered if she truly believed I would hurt Brooke again.

"What's wrong?"

I turned towards Brooke who carried our bag across her shoulder, I smiled and took it from her.

"It's nothing."

"The look on your face wasn't nothing. Luke is it your heart?" Her hand fell against my chest and I inhaled deeply.

"No, it's not my heart. It's nothing. Remember, I'm brooding." I said in my deepest voice.

She smiled and popped her hip to the side.

"Well then let's go Broody boy, I've got lots of fish to see." She skipped forward and grabbed my hand dragging my along with her.

* * *

><p>The car ride became a little bumpy and it started to interfere with my thoughts. I gripped the arm rest tightly hoping it would help me relax and clear my mind again. I took in my surroundings as I really never saw anything more beautiful and peaceful. At the moment I didn't want this feeling to disappear.<p>

The car finally came to a stop. I waited a moment before opening my door.

"What's bothering you?" His voice was a little more concerned that I wanted it to be but he waited to speak while we were alone.

"Nothing." I said in my most chirper mood, he wasn't buying it.

"It's me, Nathan and Haley are not in the car at the moment. Talk to me Rach."

I didn't know if I should tell him or not, Clay sometimes took my words and feelings toward other men a little too forward. Jealousy was an evil trait I really did dislike about Clay.

"Don't take what I am saying the wrong way, you promise?" I turned my whole body towards Clay and he nodded placing his hand over his heart.

"I promise. What's wrong?" He removed his hand from his chest and took mine in his.

"I don't think Lucas and Brooke should be together." There I finally confessed a dark secret I've kept to myself for years.

The look on Clay's face was baffled. He truly didn't understand.

"Why would this upset me? Or are you trying to tell me by asking me not to take what you're saying as wrong as a way of telling me discretely that Lucas is who you really want?" His tone started towards his jealous streak but I realized how that came out and I shook my head.

"No, no, no! I mean…shit…I just think that Brooke and Lucas are like a ticking time bomb. Something always happens that ends up putting them in dark places when things go to shit. I remember high school, you weren't there, I never wanted to see that kind of torment in Brooke ever again and Luke." I couldn't help but grin at the mention of his name.

"Lucas is that friend, that guy friend, that I could never have true feelings for but he means the world to me as if he were my family. He _is_ my family and so is Brooke. I couldn't bear to see something happen to Lucas and then Brooke crumble and lose herself all over again. I couldn't bare it." I started to cry. Tears were not a good thing for my reputation. I hated, no I despised crying. It was a horrible emotion for humans to possess.

"Ray, I really don't think it would matter if Brooke and Lucas were dating or not. They are meant for each in every way possible. I think it would destroy her either way if Lucas were no longer a part of her life at all. Let them enjoy their time together even if it, God forbid, is a short time." He reached up and started clearing up the tears.

"I hate crying." I wiped some of the tears away myself after his fingers left my cheeks.

"You shouldn't. You are absolutely beautiful when you cry. It makes you vulnerable and you believe it makes you weak. It doesn't make you weak, it makes you stronger." He gave me an encouraging smile.

"I just couldn't stand to lose either one of them and for them to lose each other. It's not right, it could…it just can't ever happen." I was definitely letting my guard down and I seemed like a helpless child.

"Talk to them. I don't like to see you this way and I know Brooke and Lucas can pick up on your emotions. They know that you love them both so much and that you don't want anything happening to either one of them but it's not in your control." He was right.

Clay wasn't the smartest person in the world, but he always knew when to say the right thing. Besides Lucas, he was the only other man who understood me. Of course I knew I was in love with him. I took in a deep breath.

"I love you, Clay."

He smiled, "I love you more," and gently kissed me.

"Everything will be alright." He said.

I had to believe him. I just had too.

* * *

><p>We finally made it to the best snorkeling site on the island. There were a few other couples and families here as well getting ready for the unknown excitement we would be encountering under water.<p>

"Calm down little lady before you burst out of your skin." He whispered in my ear as his arm slid down my back caressing my hip.

"I've never been snorkeling. This is really exciting for me." I leaned against his warm chest and closed my eyes taking him in.

We were really here together and everything finally felt right and in place. I couldn't imagine being anywhere better and any other person in the world than right here with Lucas.

"Well pretty girl let's get our adventure started."

I squealed as the excitement was becoming too much for me.

We had to sit through a "class" on what to do and what not to do. Basically they were telling us to have a great time but to be cautious of our surroundings and show absolutely no harm to the underwater life.

We were given our own snorkeling masks. The instructors would be swimming with us but giving us our reign to explore on our own. We all swam out together in a small herd and then dispersed along the marked off regions. Another couple chose to follow us and I didn't mind, it wasn't like Lucas and I planned on doing anything naughty, we were really here and excited to explore underwater.

"Don't give yourself a leg cramp, Davis." Lucas winked at me before placing his tube in his mouth and disappearing slightly underwater.

I did the same and dove into the water. The amazing wonders that my eyes fell upon were nothing I could imagine before. I didn't even know if I had words to describe the beauty that I was seeing.

Fish of all different colors swam around us. The instructors showed up pictures with the names of the fish. From the ones I remembered distinctly I could make out as I swam with them. There was a cluster of parrotfish with their exotic pinks, greens, and blues. They were absolutely breathtaking. Then I was able to point out the fairy basslets. They were interesting to me as they consisted of two vibrant colors, yellow and purple. Mostly their front half was one color then the rest of the body became the other color. It was like God wanted just the front half to be purple and the other half to be symmetrical of yellow.

Lucas rested his hand on my back as he pointed and my mouth dropped open losing my breathing tube. A barracuda which the guides told us would be a possibility to see was swimming towards us. They told us to remain calm if we were to come in contact with them. They only react if you provoke them. I dug my nails into Lucas' arm. The hellish creature swam along with the fish towards us. The closer the animal came near the clearer I could see its razor sharp teeth. This barracuda was huge, at least six feet long. Even though I was underwater, I was holding my breath in suspense not because of lack of oxygen. The barracuda's tail hit Lucas in the shoulder and I dug my nails deeper into his skin. It didn't seem to bother him at all, but the giant, slender fish slithered away and out of sight. I reached for my tube and resurfaced out of the water.

I inhaled a deep breath trying to regain steady breaths. Lucas surfaced too and removed his mask treading lightly in the water.

"You wanted an adventure." He grinned at me.

"Yes and I got one! That was so exhilarating. Not knowing what was going to happen with that hellish fish! It was awesome!" Yes, I was scared, but it was an exciting scared.

"Want to do some more exploring?" He asked and I reached out to touch his face.

"What do you think?" I winked at him and went back into the water.

We swam around some more, I let my fingers gently glide against the course edges of the coral. More exotic fish, names I didn't know were in our sight. All the wonderful colors that were brought to my attention only gave me ideas for a clothing line. It was great and a fantastic way to literally dive in and be able to do up close and personal research and pull ideas from.

We took a break, climbed up on one the rocks stranded near the snorkeling area and rest for a bit. Swimming was no joke and took a lot out of you. I definitely now didn't want to leave for nobody or nothing. This was the grandest place I've ever traveled to and this is where I wanted to be for the rest of my life. Soaking in the sun with the man I've only ever been in love with. This is what I wanted for my life.

It was beginning to get late and Lucas and I hurried to the showers. I quickly rinsed off the salt water and washed my hair. I let the breeze dry my hair as it began to dry in waves. I decided to keep my outfit choice low key. Yes, I love making a fashion statement but this time I just wanted to blend in. I wore a strapless dress with flowing fabrics. It was a jade green that camouflaged me into the palm trees. I put on some flats and grabbed my bag.

Once outside, my eyes immediately fell upon Lucas. He was dressed handsomely in a pair of khaki shorts and a black button down. Simple as he was mesmerizing.

"Wow." He said and I stopped.

"What?" I almost thought he was shocked that I was not all glammed up. I wasn't even wearing make up. Did he not like me this way?

"What? Should I have put make up on? I just figured with the—"

"No, Brooke, this is the most beautiful I've even seen you before. So natural and care free. You are the most beautiful woman I've ever laid my eyes upon. I genuinely mean that." He reached his hand out to mine and pulled me close to him.

"Lucas, I—" I wanted to tell him how much I loved him but he rudely interrupted me with a passionate kiss.

"Come on or Naley and Clachel will wonder if we abandoned them." He said against my lips.

"Clachel? Really Luke?"

"Hey, I'm trying here." He winked at me.

* * *

><p>The band started playing and it was just simply amazing. I usually don't like being involved with crowds of people I don't know but this just felt different. We were all here for vacation and fun. We all wanted to have a great time. Nathan and I met a couple from Atlanta and the guy, Henry, graduated from Duke two years ago. Imagine that.<p>

"I wonder if Lucas and Brooke are okay?" Nathan whispered in my ear.

"Honey, they are pretty much official now, they are probably taking their time to get here or probably doing it the whole way here." I admit I was slightly jealous of them.

They were in love and even though Lucas can't admit that out loud yet, they were crazy about each other. The reason why I feel jealous is sometimes I miss being in love. Yes, Nathan was the only man for me and I was madly and deeply in love with him. Had I become a prude? I know I can be a little shy about sex but maybe I should take a page out of Rachel's book.

"Hey Scott, wanna do something a little naughty?" I have never had sex with Nathan in public where anyone could walk in on us…but I was definitely feeling a little frisky and a bad girl.

Nathan's mouth fell open and his mouth went wide.

"Are you serious?" He asked me as if that was the last thing he ever expected me to say.

"Oh my gosh! Am I really that bad? Am I that much of a prude?"

Nathan started to panic and grabbed my face gently between his hands.

"No Hales, not at all. You're not a prude but you aren't _Rachel_ either. I love that you like to keep that part of our life a secret and just for _our_ pleasure. I love you for who you are not who you pretend to be silly goose. But don't take my reaction negatively. I love that you surprise me and this is definitely a surprise. You sure do know how to keep me on my toes Haley James." He bent down and kissed me gently but with all the love he possessed.

"Wow, I'm definitely horny now." I winked at him and started pulling him away from the beach.

"Marry me."

I stopped dead in my tracks.

"What?" I whispered nearly losing my voice.

"Haley James." He knelt down on one knee and I loved that nobody was really paying us any attention.

"Marry me? I can't imagine my life with anybody else but you." He reached into his pocket and pulled out that little black box every girl dreams of receiving from the man she wants to spend the rest of her life with.

"Yes." I said nodding my head furiously.

He opened the box and it was the loveliest ring I'd ever seen. He slipped it on my finger and it was perfect.

"I love you Nathan Scott."

"I love you Haley James."

I couldn't control myself anymore. I dragged him into the trees and we got lost in the darkness together.

* * *

><p>As we arrived I saw Haley dragging Nathan into the darkness away from the crowd. I knew exactly what they were doing and I shook my head.<p>

"Naughty girl. You go Haley James." I meant for just myself to hear until Brooke spoke.

"What about Haley? Where are they?"

I grinned and took Brooke's hand in mine.

"Let's just find Clay and Rach."

Once we spotted them, they looked as if nobody else in the world mattered except them. For the first time, I didn't envy them because I experience that with Brooke every second I'm with her.

Rachel finally spotted us and her face, I couldn't read it and that was very unusual for me. I looked at her and then she looked away.

"Penny!" Clay shouted and ran towards Brooke picking her up in his arms.

There was no sting of jealousy coursing through me at all. That was a first definitely for me. I walked over to Rachel as Clay and Brooke started talking.

"I want the truth Red. What the hell is going on with you?"

Rachel looked over my shoulder towards Clay and Brooke and Clay took Brooke by the hand and they walked off. Carrying on into conversation as Brooke winked and waved at me.

"I'm sorry for how I walked away from you earlier and just spat out at you like that."

"Well, then talk to me. What's going on Rachel?" We walked near the water and dipped our toes in the wet sand.

"I am scared that Brooke will lose you all over again, Luke, and I can't, I can't bear to see that again. I don't want any of us to lose you and I don't want you to get hurt as well. Clay told me that no matter if you and Brooke were together or a part it would still be devastating for her to lose you either way and like I said I'm sorry for yelling at you earlier like I did. I had no right too."

I took her hand in mind and gave it a squeeze.

"You love Brooke and I understand you getting defensive of her, but only death can take me from her now." I pulled Rachel into a side hug and I kissed her forehead.

"I'm not going anywhere this time; I have everything I need now."

"I'm happy for you Lucas, I really am."

I was going to speak when I heard the familiar shrill echo through the air. Rachel and I turned to see Brooke drooling over Haley's hand and grinning like an idiot at Nathan. Rachel and I walked towards them and that's when I noticed it. There was a large diamond ring residing on Haley's left hand. I turned towards my brother and he blushed.

"Believe it or not I was going to ask for your blessing to marry Hales."

"You wouldn't have had too. Congratulations!" I pulled my baby brother into a hug then reached for my sister to be finally into my arms.

"I am so happy for you Hales." I breathed into her hair.

We spent the rest of the night celebrating and enjoying the life that we were blessed with, particularly me.

Once we made it back to the house, we opened a bottle of wine since we didn't have champagne and made a toast on Nathan and Haley's behalf. We all got in our swimsuits and enjoyed each other's company in the pool. After some time I got out and watched as some of the people I cared about most in the world were happy.

As I finished my last beer, something didn't feel right. I sat up straight and took in a deep breath. Something was wrong. All of a sudden I was having trouble breathing, my vision started to degrade.

"Br—" I choked.

Everybody was having a good time in the pool, splashing water at each other.

"Brooke." I choked once more and it wasn't loud enough for anybody to hear.

I threw the beer bottle I had in my hand on the ground and watched as it shattered around me.

Things were growing dark, I couldn't feel anymore.

"Brooke." I said once more.

I finally got everyone's attention. What vision I had left fell upon Brooke. She went pale.

"LUCAS!" She screamed as she started rushing towards me as everyone else did as well.

"Brooke, I, I…"

"LUCAS!" She climbed out of the pool and rushed towards me and it panned out in slow motion as I felt my body begin to shut down.

"I, I, I love you." Everything went black.

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><p><strong>Don't hate me!<strong>

**Love it? Hate it? I did a lot with this chapter, I am satisfied about it, but your opinions mean a lot to me! Read and Review! I love hearing from you all!**

**XoxO**


	18. Hospital

**Thanks guys! Although I do feel I have lost quite a few readers or at least the ones that leave reviews but I will do you all a favor that will benefit me as well, if I can get at least TEN reviews, I'll post another chapter by Sunday evening...challenge for you dedicated fans! **

**This chapter is short, but I felt if I continued with what I have in mind for the next scene, this chapter would be ridiculously long. **

**Enjoy! **

**x**

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><p><em><strong>It's like you're screaming and no one can hear<strong>_

"_LUCAS!" _

"_Br..."_

_The water was like this weight I couldn't shake. I was trying desperately to get to him. _

"_LUCAS!" My screams were drowning everything else around me. I was only focused on him and not the arms trying to help me out of the water._

_I finally was able to get out and I ran towards him just in time for him to utter those three little words I've only dreamt of hearing him say._

"_I, I, I love you." He went lifeless before me._

"_NOOOOOOO! LUCAS!"_

I don't think I've ever been this scared before. There was only one other time I even felt close to this and it was when Karen was in the hospital delivering baby Lily. That seemed so long ago that it wasn't even tangible to how I felt now. The doctor wouldn't give us any details and would only speak to Nathan because he was family. It irritated me to my core. What gives that man the right to excuse me from knowing what is happening to the man I love more than anything in this universe. He didn't know me and he especially didn't know a fucking thing about Lucas.

I called Karen immediately as well as Dr. Jensen. I didn't care if the doctors had contacted him as well. I wanted someone to talk to me not to Nathan to relay messages. Karen was on her way to St. John now and Dr. Jensen said there wasn't a heart available yet. I started to panic and yell at Dr. Jensen. This wasn't his fault but I felt the need to blame somebody. This wasn't supposed to happen. We were all at peace, calm, and enjoying life in the best way possible. The ass hole doctor finally came out and explained that Lucas was in a coma.

I caved and my knees hit the cold tile floor of the foreign hospital. I couldn't control my anger, despair, and love. He was in a coma and his heart was weakening by the moments that passed by. A strong pair of arms reached for me and pulled me from the ground. I didn't care anymore. The man that means everything to me was most likely going to die if he didn't get a heart and there were no hearts to be donated.

I started to cause a scene in the middle of the hospital as other families that were grieving and had loved ones they were waiting on watched me. I didn't care; I honestly didn't even know how I was able to breathe anymore. I was slowly and surely going to lose everything.

The doctor returned again and this time he was polite enough to let us all here what he had to say as Nathan approached him.

"Will he be able to make it out of the coma? We all know that he was on the donor list for a heart...will he be able to survive this?" Nathan asked the question we all wanted to know but couldn't bring ourselves to ask out loud.

"I spoke with Mr. Scott's doctor back in the states. He explained to me that Lucas had stopped taking his HCM medicine and that was an awful mistake on his part. That medicine worked to keep his heart going especially in this particular time with his heart steadily losing life." The arrogance of this man.

"We do not need the sarcasm or the lectures. We just want a yes or no answer." Haley bit her tongue as she tried to say it as sweetly as she could.

The doctor grunted and finally his eyes came into contact with mine and for the first time he softened.

"Mr. Scott got careless and now truly it is up to him if he wants to live or not. He has been moved towards the top of the list now sense he is in ICU. I..." His eyes were still on me as I glared at him.

"I am sorry but right now there is nothing we can do but just wait." He nodded and walked away.

I still hadn't spoken. I didn't know what to say. That son of a bitch just said that this is now a waiting game.

"Can we see him?" My voice was unrecognizable to my own ears.

The doctor stopped and nodded.

"Room 241, Miss." He walked off again.

I noticed that there was not a ring on his finger. Maybe this man has never experienced a loss in his life to come off so cold but when he finally looked at me something changed in him. Clay still had his arms around me holding me up for support.

"Maybe you should go first."

It was surprising that Nathan spoke up and suggested I go see Lucas first.

"But Nate...I..."

"Brooke, if there is going to be anybody to bring him back to us." The tears finally began to pour from his eyes.

I couldn't stand this. We were all distraught and afraid that we may lose him.

"Haley, I, I can't go by myself." My grip became almost painful to me but she didn't' seem to mind. Her hand closed over mine tightly as well.

"Of course, Tigger." She was doing her best to not lose her composure, but I knew Haley wanted to cry out.

Rachel squeezed Nate's arm and it was a sweet gesture on her part. Haley reached out and took Rachel's hand with her free one and smiled at her. Even in a time like this, we are came together, just as we should.

It was like walking the plank, death row. The feeling that all of your worst fears were coming to the surface at maximum speed. I felt as if I were suffocating. Haley's grip was tight on my arm just as my hand was around hers. We knew Lucas wasn't dead...yet...it was scary for us because we've never seen him like this. Yes, Lucas has had to go the hospital a few times but he was never unconscious or unresponsive. We finally saw the numbers tiled diagonally across the door, 241. I felt my skin break as small droplets of blood rose from underneath my skin on the back of my hand from Haley's amazing death grip. I couldn't blame her; if I were holding her neck she'd be dead by now. Haley reached for the door first as I felt frozen in place. No sound came as the door glided open and then the horrible beeps echoing from the monitor lying next to a bed with what almost looked like a corpse. It took everything in me to not fall to my knees once again. Haley and I were holding each other up. Haley and I were always each other's life lines and this was the biggest one of all.

Lucas was pale, almost a shade of blue. I didn't think a coma left you looking like a corpse necessarily, but suddenly the up and down movement of his chest became visible. I released the breath I had not realizing I had been holding. We stopped at the edge of the bed both of us terrified that we might break him if we were to touch him.

"Oh Luke." Haley breathed with a shy whisper.

I didn't know what to say, I didn't know what I should do. I lost my words as my mind became cloudy incapable of working properly.

I took a risk and reached out for Lucas's hand. It was warm surprisingly. Haley finally dared to touch him too and we both felt relieved of the warmth within him compared to his exterior shell.

"Lucas." I could only say his name at the moment.

There was so much I wanted to say. So much I need him to hear. He's my other half. He's the left side of my brain, the veins that runs under my skin, the only beat in my heart. I didn't want Haley to be present for that or anybody at all. Those are only meant to be words I share with him until our wedding day. Will we have a wedding day? It's not that I wish to doubt but only to prepare myself for the possibility I may never marry Lucas, have his children, or live my life with him.

"Brooke."

I looked over at Haley and I for this whole time was only thinking about myself and how this would make me feel. Her swollen red eyes. The tears caked on her face that still ran down her neck. This would be devastating for Haley as well. Lucas has always been her best friend, her family. They have been through everything together. Their friendship stands the tests of time as they have continued to overcome every challenge thrown at them together.

"Spend some time with him Hales." I kissed her forehead and walked out of the room before she could protest me.

I shout the door behind me and slid down the wall slowly as my feet fell out from under me. I balled into the fetal position and rocked myself back and forth. I wanted to be soothed, comforted, but the only way that would happen if Lucas had his arms around me but that can't happen right now.

Oh Haley...how will this change her as a person? She will still have the love of her life with her by her side but will a piece of her feel a fraction of how I will feel if he were to leave us? I know she would. Nathan...everything him and Lucas have been through. A father who kept them apart from each other for years, they were able to overcome that and be brothers.

Karen, Lily...

I wanted to scream. If Lucas dies...he'll be leaving behind so many people that will never be the same again.

I didn't realize how heavy my eyelids felt until a hand was on my shoulder jolting me out of my daze.

"Brooke, you okay?"

"Nate?"

I felt him slide down onto the ground next to me and pulled me into his embrace. I buried my face into his chest. His scent was the opposite and yet similar to Lucas. Lucas had more of a citrus scent to him while Nathan had a natural, earthy smell to him and yet they both smelled out sweetness. It smelled like Karen, Lily, and their home. So it was a smell designed just for them to signal that they are a family, as one.

"Why are you out here looking like you're about to fall asleep?" He had brushed the hair out of my face and was softly and genuinely rubbing my back for comfort.

"Everything I wanted to say to Lucas, I wanted to say in private, so I gave Haley the first moment to be with him." I coughed and began to feel sick.

"Brooke, are you okay?"

"I just feel dizzy."

Nate moved one of his arms from around me and I looked away from his chest to see Clay and Rachel coming over to us.

"Do you have any headache medicine in that suitcase you have?"

I smiled just a little as Nate sliced through the tension for a moment.

For once Rachel had no comeback to spit out. That's definitely a sign of bad news. I heard the familiar rattle of pills in a plastic bottle. Nate gave me two and his water. I felt this would only make me sicker, but I didn't want Nate to have to worry about my health too.

"Hey."

Nate turned with me in his arms and looked up at Haley who leaned against the shut door.

Nate helped us both up front the floor as I gently pulled myself from his arms and pushed him towards Haley.

"Are you going in?" Haley asked aloud.

"Yeah." I walked in quietly.

Nate pulled the door closed and I walked over to sit by Lucas's side. His warmth was still there as I placed my face into his palm.

"You weren't supposed to leave me." I couldn't help the words as they escaped from my lips.

"I'm I'm sorry. I just love you so much Luke." I removed my face from his hand and looked up to his face.

It was as if he were brooding in his coma. I shook my head. Could he possibly hear me? I know they say if you talk to a coma patient, most of the time they could hear you as if you were the lighthouse guiding them through the storm.

"You can't go anywhere Luke. After what seems like forever, we're finally happy...together. Luke?" I whispered his name.

The only response was the echoing beeps of the monitors.

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><p><strong>Thoughts? Let's hear them! <strong>

**x**


	19. Arrival

**I am so, so sorry about not getting the chapter up by Sunday night! Work went a little too late for me on Sunday and by the time I saw all of my reviews it was late, late in the early AMs on Monday when I realized it. Classes started for me yesterday and I had some complications with that, but I was able to finish this chapter as quickly as I could! Again I am sorry for the delay, but deep down, thank you to all that reviewed!**

**Just letting you know a few chapters are left and then it will be the end! Enjoy!**

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><p><em><strong>Out of the night that covers me, <strong>_

_**Black as the pit from pole to pole, **_

_**I thank whatever gods may be**_

_**For my unconquerable soul.**_

_**Invictus, Henley.**_

I felt the warmth of something soft and tender against my head. My eyes fluttered open and I saw a familiar, kind, and comforting face.

"Brooke, sweetie."

"Karen?" My voice came out as a soft whisper barely audible to myself.

She smiled. Tears came to my eyes and, as a child would after having a nightmare, I reached up to her and pulled her into a hug. I held onto her and I felt incapable of letting go. She didn't in any way try to pry me away. She held me like a mother held their child; she wasn't going to let me go until I wanted her too.

"I'm so sorry, Karen." I began to shake and she knew I wanted to let her go; I just physically wasn't able to.

She started to pull away never letting her hands fall from me. I finally came face to face with her. Her son was lying in a coma right beside us and her entire focus is on me.

"Brooke, you have nothing to be sorry for. You are a daughter to me as Lucas is my son. How are you?"

I couldn't help but let fresh tears run down my face.

Karen smiled and then turned away from me and looked down at Lucas. His chest rose up and down as if he were just sleeping not trapped in a nightmare.

"My baby boy." She reached down and touched his hand and then his face.

I started to back away but she called out to me and asked me to stay.

"I just can't believe this is happening to him. He was always so healthy and active. He had a decent diet; he did his best to stay out of known trouble." She placed her hand over her face as I'm sure numerous occasions when he was acting wild that went undetected crossed her mind.

"He was having such a wonderful time. He was never unhappy or stressed. We were all happy...together." I wrapped my arms around my body.

"I know. He called me everyday." Karen looked over her shoulder at me.

I didn't know this. I didn't realize that Luke had been calling Karen this whole time. It was a beautiful gesture. Lucas loved his mother and would do anything for her.

Karen released her hand from Lucas and placed it over her face as she began to cry silently. I bent down and reached out to her. I couldn't stand to see her cry or be sad. I held her as we both cried at Luke's bedside.

"I want him back here with us so badly."

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><p><em>I felt cold. This cold felt strange to me. Cold weather I could deal with but this...this was different. It left me feeling empty. As if something was missing. Then I felt <em>_**it.**_

"My baby boy."

_Mom? I wanted to reach out to her, touch her, and hold her. I could barely feel her touch, but I could hear her clearly. Where am I? I tried to move my arms and legs but nothing happened._

"I just can't believe this is happening to him. He was always so healthy and active. He had a decent diet; he did his best to stay out of known trouble."

_Who was she talking to? Where am I? _

"He was having such a wonderful time. He was never unhappy or stressed. We were all happy...together."

_Brooke? Brooke and my mom were here and they sounded so sad. Then, like a flash of lightning striking me, I remembered what happened. I remembered the sharp pain shooting through my whole body as my heart started to slow down. It was like some of the murmurs I would have. It hit you like a ton of bricks. My legs gave out on me and the last thing I remember was seeing Brooke run towards me and I finally told her I loved her. _

"I know. He called me everyday."

_Oh mom. I am lying in a hospital bed incapable of reaching out to the people I love most in this world. All I wanted to do was hold them both and tell them that I was going to be alright but I didn't know this. For all I know I could already be dead but obviously not if I am coherent of them talking around me. Then I realized that I did notice I was breathing. I could feel my chest rise and fall with normal breaths._

"I want him back here with us so badly."

_I heard movement and then the sounds of crying. I tried with everything I had in me to move. I wanted to reach out to both of them and bring them in my arms and tell them that everything was going to be okay. The sad and scary part about it is I do not know if everything is going to be alright. I am what I assume in a coma. I wish there was something I could do, some way to communicate with them that I am here, I am aware of them, their presence. _

"Is Lily here?" Brooke asked and her voice, it was so broken.

_Oh Brooke. I love you, I love you, I...love…you!_

"Yes, I didn't want her to see Luke this way, but I had to think of all outcomes, and I know she would want to say goodbye if it comes to it." My mother sounded so sad.

_The silence that filled the room gave me shivers that felt like needles going down my spine. To say goodbye? Will I have a chance to say goodbye if I do die? _

"She's with Rachel. She loves Rachel; it's almost a little funny to me."

_I could feel my mother's smile. It was like sunshine, just like Brooke's._

"I'll leave you alone with him. He's your son, you deserve all the time in the world with him."

"As do you Brooke."

_If it were even possible, my heart was breaking even more. To see two of the most precious people in the world to me sound so shattered and alone scared me. I couldn't and did not want to leave them._

"I'm not going anywhere." Brooke left the room.

_Mom! MOM! I kept shouting but no sound came out. For once, I wanted to be like a child, treated like a child. I wanted her to hold me and tell me everything was going to be alright. Something deep down inside me told me I may not get that chance. I may not get the chance to ever tell mom, Lily, and Brooke, most of all Brooke, that I love them and will always be with them._

"Oh Lucas, sometimes I feel like I've done something wrong in my life to see you like this."

_No, you could never have done anything wrong. You're my mother; you've only ever done good! Don't think that way at all!_

"I want to blame Dan sometimes; actually I do blame him everyday for your heart condition. He passed it to you, but in the end, it's not his fault. Is it?"

_I hated hearing her sound so unsure, so doubtful. Of course, I blamed Dan too…but I also had to blame myself. I didn't take my medication and that is my fault. I was just hoping, hoping, that a small part of me believed in the act of love. Doesn't love heal? Love lifts us up where we belong, all you need is love? Right?_

"My boy. My sweet baby boy."

_She began to cry and it made me gasp, even within my own head, I gasped. It took the air right of my lungs. She took my hand and held it in between her own. She placed gentle kisses on my hand and I wanted to cry with her. Mom, I don't want to leave you. _

"Parents aren't supposed to outlive their children."

_Just as she spoke the words, I thought them as well. I was supposed to watch her passing on to the next life, not the other way around. Mom, I make a promise to you forever and now. I will outlive you! You will not see me die! I will get through this; I will fight to come back to you, Lily, Nathan, Haley, and most importantly Brooke. I will not leave you, any of you. I am going to fight and fight and fight! I am the master of my fate! I am the captain of my soul!_

* * *

><p>Why did it have to be so cold? I mean, a relaxing, soothing cold is always nice, but this cold…this cold was on the verge of death. I was shaking so bad and Nathan had to give me his jacket and he was cold as well. I tried to offer it back, but he just shook his head at me. He was always so kind to me even though I did try to steal him away from Haley at one point.<p>

Karen and Lily had shown up not even thirty minutes ago and it was finally beginning to hit me that something was seriously wrong with Lucas. Karen was here, and with the look of horror on her face at the realization that her son may not make it through this was horrifying. Lily looked tired, she knew Lucas was sick but that was it. She was sleeping in Karen's arms and Nathan gently took her from Karen.

Karen hugged Nate with Lily in his arms. She went to Haley next and she surprised me as she pulled me into a tight hug and squeezed me as a mother does when she is concerned. It shocked me because I didn't realize she felt this motherly to me. I was friends with Brooke and Lucas, so I was occasionally over at Karen's house. She was always kind to me but she felt at first I was bad news, hell, I was but she was always nice to me, so I felt obligated and wanted to always be on good behavior with her.

She was the image of mother, a caregiver, a compassionate woman. She pulled back from me and looked at me in the eyes and then looked towards Nathan and Haley.

"How are you all holding up?" She asked as calmly as she could.

The shock was evident on all of our faces.

"How are you doing Karen? Lucas is your son?" Haley asked as she rushed to Karen and took her hand.

"Yes, Haley, he _is_ my son, but I care for you all if you were my own, even this young gentleman." She pointed towards Clay.

I don't think they have ever met.

"Clay, I presume?" She held out her hand towards him.

He was shocked and confused and placed his hand in hers. She smiled at him and nodded.

"Yes mam, I,I" He stuttered.

I don't think I've ever heard Clay stutter like that before. Then again, Karen did have this effect on people.

"Brooke has talked about you a couple of times and Rachel talks about you frequently." She smiled at me and I blushed.

This almost wasn't fair because Luke was in the other room hanging in the balance. Clay slid his arm around me and pulled me to him.

"We're doing as well as we can." I said speaking for all of us.

It seemed appropriate. We were all just now playing the waiting game, it was all we could do.

"Rachel?"

I looked up and Lily was rubbing her eye and she reached out for me. I smiled and took her in my arms. Me and Lily were quite good friends. I loved her as if she were my own. I didn't think I ever wanted children until I met Lily. She's absolutely amazing and having Karen raise her has taught me even more than ever that I want kids of my own. I wanted a spunky redheaded daughter with Clay's kindness when shown. I wanted boys with Clay's athletic ability and my stubbornness.

"Is Brooke with him?" Karen asked.

"Yes." Nathan spoke.

She smiled at all of us and kissed Lily on her forehead and went inside.

"I'm hungry." Lily said into my shoulder and leaned back to look at me.

"You want to get something to eat?" I asked her trying to remain calm. I felt that out of Nathan, Haley, and myself, that I could convince Lily that nothing is too seriously bad with Lucas.

She nodded.

"Does anybody else want anything?" I asked and nobody said anything.

"I'll come with you." Clay said.

"Who are you?" Lily asked looking at Clay curiously.

"This is Clay, he's very important to me, he's my boyfriend." I said and I looked at Clay and he smiled. I wanted our kids to have his smile.

"I'm Lily." She held her tiny, beautiful hand out to Clay.

He took it and kissed it lightly, she giggled.

"Lily, has anyone ever told you just how absolutely beautiful you are?" He asked her.

"My brother."

* * *

><p>I walked out into the hallway and Nathan and Haley were there sitting down talking amongst themselves.<p>

"Hey." Haley said as she got up and pulled me into a hug.

"Where's Lily?"

"With Rachel, she wanted something to eat." She said and we all just stared at each other.

"How does he look?" Nathan asked.

"Dead." I said coldy, but I didn't mean to say that out loud. Haley gasped; she was appalled that I would even say such a thing and Nathan just stared.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that, he's breathing normally, so that's good. He really does look like he's sleeping, lost in a nightmare, or possibly a dream." I said.

What are we to do now? I know I didn't want to leave, but there was absolutely nothing I could do. We were just supposed to stay here and wait? Or go back to the house and wait? I know I wasn't leaving him, I was not going to leave his side.

"You should go and see him, he's your brother." I said and he smiled.

"I'll give Karen a little more time."

We sat outside in the hall, just waiting. How long were we going to wait until something happened?

About ten minutes went by and Nathan went inside to see Luke, and Rachel, Clay, and Lily were now back.

"BROOKE!" Lily yelled down the hall, running towards me.

I picked her up and held her tightly to me. I smiled at Rachel as she sat down next to Haley.

"Did you eat something?" I asked her as we sat down, Lily in my lap.

"Yeah, I had a fruit cup; I didn't really see anything else I would want to eat." She spoke so gracefully for a young child.

"That's good." I said trying my best to keep my composure.

"Brookie?" She looked up at me with bright, pleading eyes.

"Yes, Lily?"

"Is Lucas going to be okay?"

How was I to answer this precious little girl? I couldn't lie to her; I could never lie to her.

"Lucas is really sick, Lily. We don't know how much longer it is going to take him to get better." It was the truth, but sugar coated for her to believe.

"I want to see him." She sounded so sad.

"Yeah, but your mom and Nate are in their right now. We'll go in, in a little bit okay pumpkin?" I poked her nose and she smiled brokenly.

I really wish I could give her great news, but not just for her, but for myself as well.

Karen walked out and came and sat down with us. We waited a little longer and Nate came out and I could tell he had been crying.

"I want to see Lucas." Lily said more urgently this time.

"Do you want me to go with you?" Karen asked and Lily squeezed my hand.

"Mommy, can Brooke come with me? I think Lucas would like it if she was with me."

I did my best to keep my tears back from slipping down my face.

"Of course sweetheart." Karen looked up at me and smiled.

I took Lily by the hand and we walked in together. I had to do my best not to cry, I couldn't cry. I didn't want to upset Lily.

"Lukie?" Lily ran towards the bed, but stopped when she got to it.

It was as if the bed scared her. She reached for Luke's hand and held it.

"Luke, can you hear me?"

Lily was only greeted with silence. I stepped back so Lily couldn't see my face. I wasn't going to break, I couldn't break.

"I believe you can hear me. You're sleeping, so I know deep down you can hear me." She took in a breath and let out a sigh.

"I love you Lucas, and I know when you wake up, you'll get better. You're the strongest person I know. You're my big brother." She said and I couldn't help it any longer, I cried.

I went into the bathroom that was in Lucas's room and closed the door behind me and cried. That sweet, sweet little girl was braver than I was, but I tried to blame it on the fact, that she didn't know Luke's heart wasn't strong enough for him anymore. She just believed he was sick and would be better soon.

A memory from high school came rushing back to me and I let myself get lost in it.

"_LUCAS!"I screamed as he fell to the ground in the middle of the court._

_I went to rush to him but Whitey and others were pushing everyone away. Number 64 on the opposing team hit Lucas in the face and tripped him. He fell like a rag doll to the ground. _

_I was waiting impatiently as he didn't move. Lucas finally came alert and his face winced in pain as he reached for his knee. _

_Lucas had broken his leg and had a bloody lip. He was taken to the ER and Haley and I followed closely behind. Luke assured Nathan that he was fine and to stay and finish playing the game. Nathan did as Luke requested._

_Haley and I had to sit in the waiting room for quite some time before they let us go in and see him. My concern for him grew deeper within me than I realized. I knew I had always a major crush on Lucas but this, this was deeper. I began to realize that I was in love with him. _

_We were finally able to go and see him. After some point, Haley went to get something to eat and I was sitting next to Lucas on the bed as he examined the cast on his leg. _

"_Well this sucks."_

_I smacked him in the shoulder._

"_What the fuck, Brooke?" He reached towards his shoulder and rubbed it._

"_You scared me!" I shouted at him._

_I didn't mean for it to sound as harsh as it came out, but it was how I felt._

"_I'm fine, Brooke." He looked at me as if I was crazy for hitting him._

"_I'm sorry that I hit you, but Luke, I, I care about you, and when you went down and you didn't move, that, that really scared me." I started twiddling my thumbs._

"_Hey." _

_And the next thing he did, I don't think he's ever touched me like this, but he reached up to my face and caressed my cheek. At fifteen years old, I knew I had never felt this sensation just from a single touch before._

"_I am never going to leave you, ever, I promise."_

He promised me he would never leave me so he would make it through this. I had to believe it. I just had to.

* * *

><p><strong>Whew! Okay so the next chapter does a time jump, just letting you know! <strong>

**Review! **

**X**


	20. Mother's Comfort

_**Out of the night that covers me, **_

_**Black as the pit from pole to pole, **_

_**I thank whatever gods may be**_

_**For my unconquerable soul. **_

I felt the warmth of something soft and tender against my head. My eyes fluttered open and I saw a familiar, kind, and comforting face.

"Brooke, sweetie."

"Karen?" My voice came out as a soft whisper barely audible to myself.

She smiled. Tears came to my eyes and, as a child would after having a nightmare, I reached up to her and pulled her into a hug. I held onto her and I felt incapable of letting go. She didn't in any way try to pry me away. She held me like a mother held their child; she wasn't going to let me go until I wanted her too.

"I'm so sorry, Karen." I began to shake and she knew I wanted to let her go; I just physically wasn't able to.

She started to pull away never letting her hands fall from me. I finally came face to face with her. Her son is lying in a coma right beside us and her entire focus is on me.

"Brooke, you have nothing to be sorry for. You are a daughter to me as Lucas is my son. How are you?"

I couldn't help but let fresh tears run down my face.

Karen smiled and then turned away from me and looked down at Lucas. His chest rose up and down as if he were just sleeping not trapped in a nightmare.

"My baby boy." She reached down and touched his hand and then his face.

I started to back away but she called out to me and asked me to stay.

"I just can't believe this is happening to him. He was always so healthy and active. He had a decent diet; he did his best to stay out of known trouble." She placed her hand over her face as I'm sure numerous occasions when he was acting wild that went undetected crossed her mind.

"He was having such a wonderful time. He was never unhappy or stressed. We were all happy...together." I wrapped my arms around my body.

"I know. He called me everyday." Karen looked over her shoulder at me.

I didn't know this. I didn't realize that Luke had been calling Karen this whole time. It was a beautiful gesture. Lucas loved his mother and would do anything for her.

Karen released her hand from Lucas and placed it over her face as she began to cry silently. I bent down and reached out to her. I couldn't stand to see her cry or be sad. I held her as we both cried at Luke's bedside.

"I want him back here with us so badly."

* * *

><p><em>I felt cold. This cold felt strange to me. Cold weather I could deal with but this...this was different. It left me feeling empty. As if something was missing. Then I felt <em>_**it.**_

"My baby boy."

_Mom? I wanted to reach out to her, touch her, and hold her. I could barely feel her touch, but I could hear her clearly. Where am I? I tried to move my arms and legs but nothing happened._

"I just can't believe this is happening to him. He was always so healthy and active. He had a decent diet; he did his best to stay out of known trouble."

_Who was she talking to? Where am I? _

"He was having such a wonderful time. He was never unhappy or stressed. We were all happy...together."

_Brooke? Brooke and my mom were here and they sounded so sad. Then, like a flash of lightning coursing through me, I remembered what happened. I remembered the sharp pain shooting through my whole body as my heart started to slow down. It wasn't like some of the murmurs I had before where iIt hit you like a ton of bricks, no; this was more like being hit by a train. My legs gave out on me and the last thing I remember was seeing Brooke run towards me and I finally told her I loved her. _

"I know. He called me everyday."

_Oh mom. I am lying in a hospital bed incapable of reaching out to the people I love most in this world. All I wanted to do was hold them both and tell them that I was going to be alright but I didn't know this. For all I know I could already be dead but obviously not if I am coherent of them talking around me. Then I realized that I did notice I was breathing. I could feel my chest rise and fall with normal breaths._

"I want him back here with us so badly."

_I heard movement and then the sounds of crying. I tried with everything I had in me to move. I wanted to reach out to both of them and bring them in my arms and tell them that everything was going to be okay. The sad and scary part about it is I do not know if everything is going to be alright. I must be in a coma. I wish there was something I could do, some way to communicate with them that I am here, I am aware of them, their presence. _

"Is Lily here?" Brooke asked and her voice, it was so broken.

_Oh Brooke. I love you, I love you, I...love…you!_

"Yes, I didn't want her to see Luke this way, but I had to think of all outcomes, and I know she would want to say goodbye if it comes to it." My mother sounded so sad.

_The silence that filled the room gave me shivers that felt like needles going down my spine. To say goodbye? Will I have a chance to say goodbye if I do die? _

"She's with Rachel. She loves Rachel; it's almost a little funny to me."

_I could feel my mother's smile. It was like sunshine, just like Brooke's._

"I'll leave you alone with him. He's your son, you deserve all the time in the world with him."

"As do you Brooke."

_If it were even possible, my heart was breaking even more. To see two of the most precious people in the world to me sound so shattered and it scared me. I couldn't and did not want to leave them._

"I'm not going anywhere." Brooke left the room.

_Mom! MOM! I kept shouting but no sound came out. For once, I wanted to be like a child, treated like a child. I wanted her to hold me and tell me everything was going to be alright. Something deep down inside me told me I may not get that chance. I may not get the chance to ever tell mom, Lily, and Brooke, most of all Brooke, that I love them and will always be with them._

"Oh Lucas, sometimes I feel like I've done something wrong in my life to see you like this."

_No, you could never have done anything wrong. You're my mother; you've only ever done good! Don't think that way at all!_

"I want to blame Dan sometimes; actually I do blame him everyday for your heart condition. He passed it to you, but in the end, it's not his fault. Is it?"

_I hated hearing her sound so unsure, so doubtful. Of course, I blamed Dan too…but I also had to blame myself. I didn't take my medication and that is my fault. I was just hoping, hoping, that a small part of me believed in the act of love. Doesn't love heal? 'Love lifts us up where we belong, all you need is love?' Right?_

"My boy. My sweet baby boy."

_She began to cry and it made me gasp, even within my own head, I gasped. It took the air right of my lungs. She took my hand and held it in between her own. She placed gentle kisses on my hand and I wanted to cry with her. Mom, I don't want to leave you. _

"Parents aren't supposed to outlive their children."

_Just as she spoke the words, I thought them as well. I was supposed to watch her passing on to the next life, not the other way around. Mom, I make a promise to you forever and now. I will outlive you! You will not see me die! I will get through this; I will fight to come back to you, Lily, Nathan, Haley, and most importantly Brooke. I will not leave you, any of you. I am going to fight and fight and fight! 'I am the master of my fate! I am the captain of my soul!'_

* * *

><p>Why did it have to be so cold? I mean, a relaxing, soothing cold is always nice, but this cold…this cold was on the verge of death. I was shaking so bad and Nathan had to give me his jacket and he was cold as well. I tried to offer it back, but he just shook his head at me. He was always so kind to me even though I did try to steal him away from Haley at one point.<p>

Karen and Lily had shown up not even thirty minutes ago and it was finally beginning to hit me that something was seriously wrong with Lucas. Karen was here, and with the look of horror on her face at the realization that her son may not make it through this was horrifying. Lily looked tired, she knew Lucas was sick but that was it. She was sleeping in Karen's arms and Nathan gently took her from Karen.

Karen hugged Nate with Lily in his arms. She went to Haley next and she surprised me as she pulled me into a tight hug and squeezed me as a mother does when she is concerned for her children. It shocked me because I didn't realize she felt this motherly to me. I was friends with Brooke and Lucas, so I was occasionally over at Karen's house. She was always kind to me but I always thought she believed I was bad news, hell, I was but she was always nice to me, so I felt obligated and wanted to always be on good behavior with her.

She was the image of mother, a caregiver, a compassionate woman. She pulled back from me and looked me in the eyes and then looked towards Nathan and Haley.

"How are you all holding up?" She asked as calmly as she could.

The shock was evident on all of our faces.

"How are you doing Karen? Lucas is your son." Haley asked as she rushed to Karen and took her hand.

"Yes, Haley, he _is_ my son, but I care for you all as if you were my own, even this young gentleman." She pointed towards Clay.

I don't think they have ever met.

"Clay, I presume?" She held out her hand towards him.

He was shocked and confused and placed his hand in hers. She smiled at him and nodded.

"Yes mam, I,I" He stuttered.

I don't think I've ever heard Clay stutter like that before. Then again, Karen did have this effect on people.

"Brooke has talked about you a couple of times and Rachel talks about you frequently." She smiled at me and I blushed.

This almost wasn't fair because Luke was in the other room hanging in the balance. Clay slid his arm around me and pulled me close.

"We're doing as well as we can." I said speaking for us all.

It seemed appropriate. We were all just now playing the waiting game, it was all we could do.

"Rachel?"

I looked up and Lily was rubbing her eye and she reached out for me. I smiled and took her in my arms. Me and Lily were quite good friends. I loved her like a daughter, I think. I didn't think I ever wanted children until I met Lily. She's absolutely amazing and having Karen raise her has taught me even more than ever that I want kids of my own. I wanted a spunky redheaded daughter with Clay's kindness. I wanted boys with Clay's athletic ability and my stubbornness.

"Is Brooke with him?" Karen asked.

"Yes." Nathan spoke.

She smiled at all of us and kissed Lily on her forehead and went inside.

"I'm hungry." Lily said into my shoulder and leaned back to look at me.

"You want to get something to eat?" I asked her trying to remain calm. I felt that out of Nathan, Haley, and myself, that I could convince Lily that nothing is too seriously bad with Lucas.

She nodded.

"Does anybody else want anything?" I asked and nobody said anything.

"I'll come with you." Clay said.

"Who are you?" Lily asked looking at Clay curiously.

"This is Clay, he's very important to me, he's my boyfriend." I said and looked at Clay and he smiled. I wanted our kids to have his smile.

"I'm Lily." She held her tiny, beautiful hand out to Clay.

He took it and kissed it lightly, she giggled.

"Lily, has anyone ever told you just how absolutely beautiful you are?" He asked her.

"My brother."

* * *

><p>I walked out into the hallway and Nathan and Haley were there sitting down talking amongst themselves.<p>

"Hey." Haley said as she got up and pulled me into a hug.

"Where's Lily?"

"With Rachel, she wanted something to eat." She said and we all just stared at each other.

"How does he look?" Nathan asked.

"Dead." I said coldy, but I didn't mean to say that out loud. Haley gasped; she was appalled that I would even say such a thing and Nathan just glared.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that, he's breathing normally, so that's good. He really does look like he's sleeping, lost in a nightmare, or possibly a dream." I said.

What are we to do now? I know I didn't want to leave, but there was absolutely nothing I could do. We were just supposed to stay here and wait? Or go back to the house and wait? I know I wasn't leaving him, I was not going to leave his side.

"You should go and see him, he's your brother." I said and he smiled.

"I'll give Karen a little more time."

We sat outside in the hall, just waiting. How long were we going to wait until something happened?

About ten minutes went by and Nathan went inside to see Luke. Rachel, Clay, and Lily came back from the cafeteria.

"BROOKE!" Lily yelled down the hall, running towards me.

I picked her up and held her tightly to me. I smiled at Rachel as she sat down next to Haley.

"Did you eat something?" I asked her as we sat down, Lily in my lap.

"Yeah, I had a fruit cup; I didn't really see anything else I would want to eat." She spoke so gracefully for a young child.

"That's good." I said trying my best to keep my composure.

"Brookie?" She looked up at me with bright, pleading eyes.

"Yes, Lily?"

"Is Lucas going to be okay?"

How was I to answer this precious little girl? I couldn't lie to her; I could never lie to her.

"Lucas is really sick, Lily. We don't know how much longer it is going to take him to get better." It was the truth, but sugar coated for her to believe.

"I want to see him." She sounded so sad.

"Yeah, but your mom and Nate are in their right now. We'll go in, in a little bit okay pumpkin?" I poked her nose and her smile was sad.

I really wish I could give her great news, but not just for her, but for myself as well.

Karen walked out and sat down with us. We waited a little longer and Nate came out and I could tell he had been crying.

"I want to see Lucas." Lily said more urgently this time.

"Do you want me to go with you?" Karen asked and Lily squeezed my hand.

"Mommy, can Brooke come with me? I think Lucas would like it if she was with me."

I did my best to keep my tears from slipping down my face.

"Of course sweetheart." Karen looked up at me and smiled.

I took Lily by the hand and we walked in together. I had to do my best not to cry, I couldn't cry. I didn't want to upset Lily.

"Lukie?" Lily ran towards the bed, but stopped when she got to it.

It was as if the bed scared her. She reached for Luke's hand and held it.

"Luke, can you hear me?"

Lily was only greeted with silence. I stepped back so Lily couldn't see my face. I wasn't going to break, I couldn't break.

"I believe you can hear me. You're sleeping, so I know deep down you can hear me." She took in a breath and let out a sigh.

"I love you Lucas, and I know when you wake up, you'll get better. You're the strongest person I know. You're my big brother." She said and I couldn't help it any longer, I cried.

I went into the bathroom that was in Lucas's room, closed the door behind me and cried. That sweet, sweet little girl was braver than I was, but I tried to blame it on the fact, that she didn't know Luke's heart wasn't strong enough for him anymore. She just believed he was sick and would be better soon.

A memory from high school came rushing back to me and I let myself get lost in it.

"_LUCAS!"I screamed as he fell to the ground in the middle of the court._

_I went to rush to him but Whitey and others were pushing everyone away. Number 64 on the opposing team hit Lucas in the face and tripped him. He fell like a rag doll to the ground. _

_I was waiting impatiently as he didn't move. Lucas finally came alert and his face winced in pain as he reached for his knee. _

_Lucas had broken his leg and had a bloody lip. He was taken to the ER and Haley and I followed closely behind. Luke assured Nathan that he was fine and to stay and finish playing the game. Nathan did as Luke requested._

_Haley and I had to sit in the waiting room for quite some time before they let us go in and see him. My concern for him grew deeper within me than I realized. I knew I always had a major crush on Lucas but this, this was deeper. I began to realize that I was in love with him. _

_We were finally able to go and see him. After some point, Haley went to get something to eat and I was sitting next to Lucas on the bed as he examined the cast on his leg. _

"_Well this sucks."_

_I smacked him in the shoulder._

"_What the fuck, Brooke?" He reached towards his shoulder and rubbed it._

"_You scared me!" I shouted at him._

_I didn't mean for it to sound as harsh as it came out, but it was how I felt._

"_I'm fine, Brooke." He looked at me as if I was crazy for hitting him._

"_I'm sorry that I hit you, but Luke, I, I care about you, and when you went down and you didn't move, that, that really scared me." I started twiddling my thumbs._

"_Hey." _

_And the next thing he did, I don't think he's ever touched me like this, but he reached up to my face and caressed my cheek. At fifteen years old, I knew I had never felt this sensation just from a single touch before._

"_I am never going to leave you, ever, I promise."_

He promised me he would never leave me so he would make it through this. I had to believe it. I just had to.

_Two hours later_

A loud sound pierced my ears as I jolted upright out of my sleep. It was Lucas' heart monitor. I started screaming for help. All the blood rushed to my head as I began to feel lightheaded. I clutched Lucas' face, screaming for him to wake up, hitting his chest. It felt like an eternity before someone showed up. Two nurses and a doctor swarmed him as another held onto me, pulling me away from the room.

"No, I can't leave him, no! Don't, Lucas!" I cried out for him sobbing like a baby. What if this was him leaving me. I wasn't ready. Oh God, please don't let this be it.

* * *

><p><strong>I am soooooo sorry I have been m.i.a awhile. I am finally finishing my last semester of college and it's a lot of work on top of working for a living. I have had this chapter written for quite some time but I just now proofread it and wanted to post it. I only see a few more chapters left in this. Again I am sorry for my absence but hopefully things will change soon. I am actually getting ready to do some writing outside of OTH. MAybe that will work out for me. thank you! xoxoxoxoxo<strong>


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